What's the impact of dressing our children as adults?

I have been reading this tread with interest, and agree with many views
put forward.

i do have a couple of questions though.

I am in the UK and our children are still in school until the end of
july, have the kids in the states finished for the summer? the reason i
ask is the original message came from a teacher just wondering how
she/he is getting so much time to post? just a thought that occured to
me (apologies if you are on maternity leave or something)

In the Uk we have some great low cost cothing stores which seen to
stock a variety of clothing some i consider in my opinion to be
unsuitable for all my girls but a majority i don't. for example plain t
shirts in pretty colours for both boys and girls for a couple of pounds
(about $3)

Over here it is very posible to get good clothes for kids with no
problems under say 10.

I have noticed however that the clothing for kids above ten can be very
provocative, and i have to say if any of my older girls come back from
the shops with anything i don't agree with it goes back straightway and
the child in question is banned from the shops for a while.

I do totally understand that social and ecconomic conciderations muct
be thought about and of course differant ethic backgrounds must be
taken into concideration. Afterall nobody would see a problem with a
child wearing a sari because it is an ethic dress yet these show a
couple of inches of tummy skin.

We have had the same problem with relatives buying unsuitable clothing
or make up in the past (whos crazy idea was Winnie the pooh
lipgloss?!?!) But we have not made it clear to the people involved that
we won't let the children too young have this stuff so they are wasting
there time and money, we get a lot of books bought now which is
fantastic.

I so believe that this is about parent power, i dress my toddler so she
has no say but even as they get older everything in the wardrobe is
there on my and other halfs say so.
Parents must protect their children from all dangers real or potential.
we can not expect other people to do it. governments, the media,
clothing companies do not have this moral obligation to do so, we do. I
see too many people putting the blame for issues like children dressed
as adult at the foot of others but afterall is said and done the
parents of children dressed in clothing which makes them look
sexualized let those children leave the house looking like that.

In My house we have a saying that 'this is a dicatorship not a
democracy and what we say goes'

It may sound a bit silly but it works for us.

Another thought I had was if the energies we are all putting into this
tread was put into campaning for longer sentances for deviants and full
disclosure of the whereabout of such people after prison we may help
the world just a little more.


(sorry if the spelling is bad i can't spell nor play boggle and forget
playing scrabble)

"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
" wrote in
oups.com:

Dragonlady,
I apologize if I'm not being clear with what I consider
"adult" like clothing. I think your confusion with this is
not necessarily due to my lack of clarification. I think
this is the issue...what is considered too riske for
children?

i think you meant risque.
how many people have to say that "no, we don't approve of the
slut puppy look" for you to believe that?
i think 2 piece bathing suits on toddlers are stupid, not
because it's "sexy", but because a toddler is fine in just a
swim diaper.


I was about to object to the stupidity of 2 piece suits on toddlers, until I
got to the swim diaper part. We never put our toddlers in suits when they
were in diapers. But not that little miss is potty trained, the idea of
getting her in and out of a wet one piece suit to go does not sound like my
idea of fun! She does have a kinda bikini style. I confess that trumped the
tankini because it was cheap. But she is so little she could run around buck
naked and not offend anyone... or most anyone I guess. All she cares about
is that it is pink and has little flowers on it.

Of course, a pair of little jeans and a polo is darling and
very appropriate. A Sunday dress and mary janes is fine.
Certainly clothing when we were growing up is fine. This
is a recent phenomenon - which is why it's a discussion
that may look on the surface as not being an issue but, in
reality, is.

by 'recent phenomenom' i'm guessing you aren't aware this
trend has been ongoing since the 60s? toddlers in hiphuggers &
halter tops? or in the 70s, the little sequin tube tops? this
isn't NEW.

lee

"Tori M" wrote in
:


you can't go by advertising to see what children actually
wear. go out to a park or something & look at some real
kids. for the most part you *won't* see kids dressed in
slutty or even "miniature adult" clothes. you'll see
jeans, t-shirts, shorts, tanktops, probably sweatpants
(which is my big bugbear. i really dislike seeing
sweatpants out in public, although i'll tend to be
charitable if they're on kids of toilet training age).

Jeff thinks I am kookie that I wont wear sweats out of the
house and I just tell him they are inside cloths and I
refuse to wear them out. He does all the time.. He can
look goofy all he wants. Those are the days I am glad I
am the only one dressing the kids.

well, sweats are exercise wear. wearing sweats out in public
just looks lazy & sloppy shrug. it really isn't that much
more difficult to put on a pair of jeans or trousers & a t-
shirt. even my mom, who has severe arthritis in her hands &
has had all her knuckles replaced twice, manages to dress
nicely without resorting to anything remotely resembling
sweats. i don't think she has ever even *owned* a sweatshirt,
never mind sweatpants!
the only sweatpants Boo has ever had were part of a Halloween
costume, black sweatshirt, black pants, 2 pairs of black
kneesocks stuffed & sewed to the sweatshirt. ta da! a spider)
lee
--
"Fascism would be better described as corporatism,
since it is marriage between the state and business"
- Benito Mussolini

"Stephanie Stowe" wrote in
news:Zxvkg.1$XJ4.0@trndny02:


"enigma" wrote in message
how many people have to say that "no, we don't approve of
the slut puppy look" for you to believe that?
i think 2 piece bathing suits on toddlers are stupid, not
because it's "sexy", but because a toddler is fine in just
a swim diaper.

I was about to object to the stupidity of 2 piece suits on
toddlers, until I got to the swim diaper part. We never put
our toddlers in suits when they were in diapers. But not
that little miss is potty trained, the idea of getting her
in and out of a wet one piece suit to go does not sound
like my idea of fun! She does have a kinda bikini style. I
confess that trumped the tankini because it was cheap. But
she is so little she could run around buck naked and not
offend anyone... or most anyone I guess. All she cares
about is that it is pink and has little flowers on it.

well, my toddler didn't toilet train until 4.25 years old
(but he's a boy & he wears swim trunks & an SPF t-shirt now,
so i guess that's technically 2 pieces g)
OTOH, i played outside all summer topless until i was 11
years old... and the only reason i had to start wear a t=shirt
then was because the neighbor girl who was 6 months younger
started to 'develop' and apparently was giving her mom a hard
time about wearing a shirt because i didn't & i was older. i
may be weird but i really wouldn't make a toddler/preschool
daughter wear a shirt anytime i would let her brother go
shirtless.
i also still use cutoffs & a t-shirt for swimming, as i have
since the 60s, because i just can't find a bathing suit (or
pattern) i like.
lee

"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
"Stephanie Stowe" wrote in
news:Zxvkg.1$XJ4.0@trndny02:


"enigma" wrote in message
how many people have to say that "no, we don't approve of
the slut puppy look" for you to believe that?
i think 2 piece bathing suits on toddlers are stupid, not
because it's "sexy", but because a toddler is fine in just
a swim diaper.

I was about to object to the stupidity of 2 piece suits on
toddlers, until I got to the swim diaper part. We never put
our toddlers in suits when they were in diapers. But not
that little miss is potty trained, the idea of getting her
in and out of a wet one piece suit to go does not sound
like my idea of fun! She does have a kinda bikini style. I
confess that trumped the tankini because it was cheap. But
she is so little she could run around buck naked and not
offend anyone... or most anyone I guess. All she cares
about is that it is pink and has little flowers on it.

well, my toddler didn't toilet train until 4.25 years old
(but he's a boy & he wears swim trunks & an SPF t-shirt now,
so i guess that's technically 2 pieces g)

My boy was also older when he potty trained. We did put trunks on him also.

OTOH, i played outside all summer topless until i was 11
years old... and the only reason i had to start wear a t=shirt
then was because the neighbor girl who was 6 months younger
started to 'develop' and apparently was giving her mom a hard
time about wearing a shirt because i didn't & i was older. i
may be weird but i really wouldn't make a toddler/preschool
daughter wear a shirt anytime i would let her brother go
shirtless.

Same here.

i also still use cutoffs & a t-shirt for swimming, as i have
since the 60s, because i just can't find a bathing suit (or
pattern) i like.
lee

enigma wrote:
"Stephanie Stowe" wrote in
news:Zxvkg.1$XJ4.0@trndny02:


"enigma" wrote in message
how many people have to say that "no, we don't approve of
the slut puppy look" for you to believe that?
i think 2 piece bathing suits on toddlers are stupid, not
because it's "sexy", but because a toddler is fine in just
a swim diaper.

I was about to object to the stupidity of 2 piece suits on
toddlers, until I got to the swim diaper part. We never put
our toddlers in suits when they were in diapers. But not
that little miss is potty trained, the idea of getting her
in and out of a wet one piece suit to go does not sound
like my idea of fun! She does have a kinda bikini style. I
confess that trumped the tankini because it was cheap. But
she is so little she could run around buck naked and not
offend anyone... or most anyone I guess. All she cares
about is that it is pink and has little flowers on it.

well, my toddler didn't toilet train until 4.25 years old
(but he's a boy & he wears swim trunks & an SPF t-shirt now,
so i guess that's technically 2 pieces g)
OTOH, i played outside all summer topless until i was 11
years old... and the only reason i had to start wear a t=shirt
then was because the neighbor girl who was 6 months younger
started to 'develop' and apparently was giving her mom a hard
time about wearing a shirt because i didn't & i was older. i
may be weird but i really wouldn't make a toddler/preschool
daughter wear a shirt anytime i would let her brother go
shirtless.
i also still use cutoffs & a t-shirt for swimming, as i have
since the 60s, because i just can't find a bathing suit (or
pattern) i like.
lee

I'm disinclined to let my kids be naked outside of the house (inside,
well, that's another story), mainly because I think that sunscreen is
creepy, and I'd rather they wear clothes than have me apply sunscreen.
(Summer clothes: t shirt and shorts, unless they're going into the
woods, when I have them wear their ridiculous white or pink leggings --
easier for seeing ticks...)

Caledonia

"Tori M" wrote:


Actually I find most of the stuff like this vomitous. Why the hell do
we have to dress little kids like mini-adults? What's wrong with cute,
CHILDREN'S clothing? I get so disgusted every time I go to buy
something for DS (almost 2.5) and all I can find are mini button-down
shirts, khakis, etc., which look like the clothing my husband wears for
work...

What is 'children's clothing' anyway? The only things that I can
really 'relate' to being 'children's clothing' is that little boys of
my dad's era (b. 1904) used to wear dresses when they were
toddlers(probably easier for TT).. The child on the left here in a
dress is my uncle with his grandmother and older sister
http://www.findagrave.com/photos/200...1039327328.jpg

And they didn't wear long pants for good Sunday clothes until they
were adults. (Not sure when this picture was taken - probably
sometime in the late 1800s)

http://familytreemaker.genealogy.com.../0032photo.jpg

This is a picture taken probably about 1910 in my grandparent's store,
and my dad is wearing suspenders and I think he is wearing knickers

http://p.vtourist.com/709773-Inside_...lver_Cliff.jpg

But we aren't dressing like that now either.

I need to find some of those for Xavier. He looks so cute in button down
but all the ones we have show off his tummy, I love Khakis too I would wear
them almost exclusivly if I could afford them in my size.. Dont tell my MIL
though she is tired of my black pants :P

Tori

"sha68" wrote in message
oups.com...
I have been reading this tread with interest, and agree with many
views
put forward.

i do have a couple of questions though.

I am in the UK and our children are still in school until the end of
july, have the kids in the states finished for the summer? the
reason i
ask is the original message came from a teacher just wondering how
she/he is getting so much time to post? just a thought that occured
to
me (apologies if you are on maternity leave or something)

Yes, school is out in many parts of the US. But I haven't seen all
that many posts from the OP, so I'm not sure why you think it's
excessive.

In the Uk we have some great low cost cothing stores which seen to
stock a variety of clothing some i consider in my opinion to be
unsuitable for all my girls but a majority i don't. for example
plain t
shirts in pretty colours for both boys and girls for a couple of
pounds
(about $3)

Wal-Mart also carries plain t-shirts and elastic waisted shorts for
about that.

We have had the same problem with relatives buying unsuitable
clothing
or make up in the past (whos crazy idea was Winnie the pooh
lipgloss?!?!)

You know, I don't really see lip gloss as makeup. It smells good,
sometimes tastes good, they put it on, and then lick it off. I don't
think we've ever gotten any official "lip gloss" but I have bought
tube after tube of flavored chapstick hoping to entice them to wear
it, unfortunately they won't. And then DD in particular gets horribly
chapped lips in the winter. I've even tried sneaking into her room to
put vaseline on her lips after she's asleep, but she always wakes up.
:-(

Another thought I had was if the energies we are all putting into
this
tread

Why are you so concerned about how other people are using their time
anyway?

Bizby

Tori M wrote:
you can't go by advertising to see what children actually
wear. go out to a park or something & look at some real kids.
for the most part you *won't* see kids dressed in slutty or
even "miniature adult" clothes. you'll see jeans, t-shirts,
shorts, tanktops, probably sweatpants (which is my big
bugbear. i really dislike seeing sweatpants out in public,
although i'll tend to be charitable if they're on kids of
toilet training age).

Jeff thinks I am kookie that I wont wear sweats out of the house and I just
tell him they are inside cloths and I refuse to wear them out. He does all
the time.. He can look goofy all he wants. Those are the days I am glad I
am the only one dressing the kids.

Tori

So, I guess you don't exercise in public?

Renee

L,
I have been thinking about your mention of the Disney Channel.

I think you are so right about the inappropriate dress/makeup of many
of the Disney Channel's TV show characters. I think we see that with
pre-teen/older children's movies, as well, many which are put out by
Disney and Nickelodeon.

And, oh my goodness, the number of little kids I have seen in thick
heel sandals! Oh my goodness. I had forgotten about that.

Anyway, thanks for the good insight. I agree.

L. wrote:
wrote:
Forget the website. Geesh. Sorry if anybody thinks I'm trying to
promote it. And, heaven forbid that I look like I'm actually promoting
the inapprorpiateness of children. Oh my goodnes.

Dragonlady,
I respect your opinion that there is nothing wrong with what children
wear. It's just something I've noticed and am concerned about. That's
all. It's worth discussing and thinking about when one looks at ads
including children - or when young children want to dress up like
little teenagers.
T

I have noticed that the Disney Channel - of all places - promotes this.
Almost every character of pre-teen and teen age is almost always
dressed "too maturely" for their character's age, IMO - and almost all
have *way* too much make-up on. In fact, many of the characters are
portrayed by actors/tresses much older than the characters (Brenda Song
is 18, Ashley Tsdale is 21, for example - both play 16 year-olds).

As for the clothing - people obviously want to buy the stuff - that's
why it is marketed. But I cringe every time I see a 12 or 9 or 6 year
old in a belly shirt, short shorts and/or "women's" shoes - ones with
big heels and/or tiny straps and glittery, etc.

AFAIC, the parents are to blame for the inappropriate dress. And I see
it a lot in places I shop locally.

-L.