reasons I've heard for not breastfeeding

But don't you want to do all you can to protect your children?

You could also say that working mothers should stay at home with their
children because it's what's best for them.


To me, I believe yes it is the answer. I put sunscreen on the kids
when they are out in the sun for long periods of time. I don't allow
them much junk food, caffeine, preservatives,...I do what I possibly
can to protect their health.
Giving a child these things occasionally is fine, just as giving
formula is fine occasionally after the baby is a few months old. But
it's not fine everyday (and we all know kids who eat nuggets and fries
and drink coke every day!)

You are comparing formula to junk food???????

LeAnn

I don't have a problem with people making choices. I have a BIG
problem with people refusing to be honest about the consequences of
their choices. I'm sick of hearing "I formula fed and my child is
perfect, so it didn't matter!" when you don't know that yet. Someone
needs to have the balls to say, "Yes, I know that I put my child at a
higher risk of illness and obesity, but for blah-blah reason, I felt
that in weighing the positives and negatives this was still the best
choice."

Or even the balls to say, "I chose to formula feed because I was
given poor information and didn't want to listen to the right
reasons."

EXACTLY!!!!!

I could easily have been a combifeeding mom -- it was my original intention,
because I didn't want to pump and didn't intend to be a SAHM. As it happened,
that's not how things turned out; I did pump. (So many things in parenting are
like that, you end up doing things you never imagined you would...) But if I
*had* used formula rather than pumping, I would have had the integrity to
admit, to myself and to anyone else who cared, that it was a choice carrying
both risks and benefits, and that the risks were mostly to my child while the
benefits were mostly to me. Sounds like "selfish" to me.

Holly
Mom to Camden, 3yo
EDD #2 6/8/04

You can think it is a VERY big deal to breastfeed and that is perfectly
fine, but I really do wonder why people think it's any of their business
what someone ELSE chooses for themselves?

Two reasons.

First, a mother's choice not to breastfeed is not primarily a choice she is
making for herself, it's a choice she is making for her baby. And there is a
community interest in parents caring appropriately for their babies, since
babies generally can't defend their own interests. Whether and to what extent
it's *right* for a total stranger, vs. a neighbor or friend, vs. a family
member vs. the government to opine or intervene is of course a matter on which
reasonable people can disagree, but it's not outrageous to say that as a
society we all have some interest in what and how babies are fed.

Second, in most cases, the mother *makes* it someone else's business by being
the one to bring it up!!!

Holly
Mom to Camden, 3yo
EDD #2 6/8/04

"Shena Delian O'Brien" wrote in message
news:Knw0c.89544$4o.113481@attbi_s52...
The mind boggles. I understand choosing not to breastfeed if you don't
have proper supply and can't get it, if your baby isn't thriving, or you
have to take medications to live which would go through the breastmilk
and harm the baby, etc... but some of the reasons I've heard lately just
floor me.

For example:

1) dh doesn't want me to (he thinks sex would be awkward with lactating
breasts, etc)

DH likes me being pg. I'm broad chested with a small B cup, and pregnancy is
the only time I have cleavage. If I breastfeed, they may even get BIGGER.
Wow...

LeAnn wrote in message
om...
I mean that my choice is based on what I see. I've seen and spent
time with both breast fed children and bottle fed children and I can't
tell a difference in intellegence, health, size, wellbeing or any
other characteristics. I would never ever put any women down for
choosing to breastfeed, after all, it is the way God intended. But
I'm offended that some women take on a 'holier than thou' attitude
when it comes to confronting women who bottle feed. Like we're not as
good a mother as they are, or we're being selfish. It's totally
unfounded.

Personally, LeAnn, one reason I breastfeed is because I'm lazy. I nannied
for a while and it's so much easier to breastfeed. And I'm comparing with
bottle feeding no more than 3 bottles a day as he was over 6 months and
mostly on solids.
Debbie

LeAnn wrote:
I would not support putting a baby to sleep on it's stomach because
it endangers it's life, formula feeding your child does not endanger
it's life.

Well, I'm sorry, but you're incorrect. Formula-feeding *does* increase the
risk of your baby/child dying from a number of different causes. Heck, it
increases the risk of SIDS, just as tummy-sleeping does. Now, not feeding
your child at ALL would be far *worse*, of course, and it's certainly better
to feed your child formula than plain cow's milk or home-brew formula. But
is *does* endanger, in a very small way, your child's life compared to
breastfeeding. It may not strike you as significant enough of an increase in
risk to be worth the trouble, and that's fine by me--it is a very small risk
that is unlikely to affect any individual. Notwithstanding, the risk that
putting your baby on her tummy to sleep is going to result in her dying of
SIDS is also a very small risk that is unlikely to affect any individual
(most of us posting here were put to sleep on our bellies, since that was
believed to be safer and we're all here, so it must be okay, right?). But to
claim there is no risk at all is just plain wrong.

But it is not my preference to breastfeed.

And heaven knows, that's fine. But please, don't kid yourself that your
choice was made without exposing your child to some risks he wouldn't have
faced otherwise.

It is my opinion, I'm not trying to force it upon anyone, I'm
only asking for respect in my choice.

I respect that you made the choice that best suited your needs, just as I
respect that some people put their babies to sleep on their tummies because
it's the only way the baby sleeps for any length of time at all. What I
can't respect is the contention that it really doesn't make any difference
which choice you make, and that goes equally for prone vs. tummy sleeping as
for breastfeeding vs. formula-feeding. Sometimes, we find we have to make
the choice that is "less good". That's okay, as long as we are aware that it
*is* less good and understand the trade-offs we're making.
--
Be well, Barbara
(Julian [6], Aurora [4], and Vernon's [2 today] mom)

All opinions expressed in this post are well-reasoned and insightful.
Needless to say, they are not those of my Internet Service Provider, its
other subscribers or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itchin' for a
fight. -- with apologies to Michael Feldman

"LeAnn" wrote in message
But
I'm offended that some women take on a 'holier than thou' attitude
when it comes to confronting women who bottle feed. Like we're not as
good a mother as they are, or we're being selfish. It's totally
unfounded.

Just out of curiosity, not flaming, has anyone "confronted" you about your
choice to use formula?
--
Marnie
--

"Welches" wrote in message
...

Personally, LeAnn, one reason I breastfeed is because I'm lazy. I nannied
for a while and it's so much easier to breastfeed. And I'm comparing with
bottle feeding no more than 3 bottles a day as he was over 6 months and
mostly on solids.
Debbie

Debbie, you can put me in the "lazy" camp, too. Formula feeding isn't hard,
but I have to say that I started nursing out of laziness too. I just
didn't want to get up out of my nice warm bed to make a bottle, when I could
just unbutton. Speaking of selfish. :P

After DD moved to her own room, though, it was a wash. It was a cold
barefoot trip down the hall either way.

Donna

where is your evidence for saying that in the majority of cases the decision to
FF wasn't thought out? How can you know what went through every FFing mother's
mind before she chose to FF?

my mother said that when my older brother was born she tried
breastdeeding and nothing came out. Her doctr checked and she didn't
have any milk to give.