toddler questions

Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

Thanks.

I listen to classic rock and stations that play the 80s, 90s, and today
stations. Sometimes country and sometimes oldies.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

wrote in message
oups.com...
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

Thanks.

Oops sorry, this should have gone to the other thread. For this, I would
just tell the truth and explain what it is. No biggie.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

wrote in message
oups.com...
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

Thanks.

wrote and I snipped:
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

What's wrong with being judgmental? Parenting includes passing on your
values to your children. It's not too early to explain what smoking is and
to put in your anti-smoking plug. It *is* unhealthy, and you don't want
your children to get started.

-Patty, mom of 1+2

wrote in message
oups.com...
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire".



Because he is dumb as a box of rocks! (Disclaimer: I accepted this title
when I was a smoker.)


I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?


IMO you should tell it to her like it is. And if that means being
judgemental then so be it.

Thanks.

wrote:
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

I think I said something like, "Some people like to smoke. It's not
good for your body, and I think it's yucky and smells bad, so our
family doesn't like it, but some people do."

Beth

wrote:
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

Thanks.

Be honest about the health implications of smoking.
However you may have to be careful if you have smokers in your family.
I do not want my DS to tell my parents that they are stupid for
smoking, I have therefore explained how they started smoking before
people knew it was bad and now they are addicted and therefore find it
very hard to smoke. You can then go on to say how everyone knows how
bad it is these days and then include your own judgements.

Mary Ann

"Mary Ann" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

Thanks.

Be honest about the health implications of smoking.
However you may have to be careful if you have smokers in your family.
I do not want my DS to tell my parents that they are stupid for
smoking,


Back when I was smoking, I did it first so my sister did not have to. I
explained the stupidity of *starting* and the difficulty of quitting. I
talked a tad about addiction. I told her that any time she wanted to remind
me it was yucky and bad for me, she should feel free.



I have therefore explained how they started smoking before
people knew it was bad and now they are addicted and therefore find it
very hard to smoke.
You can then go on to say how everyone knows how
bad it is these days and then include your own judgements.



As kids get older, you can discuss stupid teenagers like me who *know* it is
bad for them, that it is addictive but do it anyway to be "cool".

Mary Ann

wrote in message
oups.com...
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

I agree with "what's wrong with judgemental?"

Why try to sound non-judgemental? It's a dirty habit, when we walk
past smokers I intentionally guide my daughter further away from them
telling her I don't want her breathing in yucky smoke. We call it a
dirty habit, and dirty habits make you sick, blah blah blah...

KR

wrote:
Yesterday My 3.5 yo showed me someone on the walkway smoking and asked
why "that man's mouth is on fire". I didn't know how to answer. Luckily
she spotted something else on the road and asked something else. I know
the next time she seems someone else smoking she'll ask again. How do I
explain to her what smoking is without sounding judgemental?

Thanks.