10 ways to be a better father

In article , Bob
wrote:

dragonlady wrote:
Bob did.

Bob has consistently said that he doesn't think adultry hurts a marriage.

Uh, no. That wasn't what Bob said. Bob said that adultry often doesn't
hurt a marriage as much as jealousy, spite, vindictiveness, malice,
feminism, and *******s.

You would probably be better posting your own opinion and not trying to
paraphrase someone else's opinion.

Bob



Bob, you demanded that I show that adultery hurt a marriage, and
insisted that there was no harm if the person wasn't caught.

If I misunderstood you, please clarify: is adultery harmful to a
marriage? Does it make a difference to you if it is a man committing
adultery or a woman?

Assume that there are NO children conceived or STD's brought into the
marriage. Assume, if you like, that they don't get caught. Is adultery
under those circumstances wrong and/or harmful to the marriage?

meh
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

On Wed, 26 Nov 2003 12:09:08 -0800, Rauni
wrote:

On Wed, 26 Nov 2003 19:44:25 GMT, dragonlady
wrote:

Can you ever decry men's deeds when THEY are wrong?

Of course not! Andre and the soc.men crowd have embraced the "culture
of victimhood" You know victimhood empowerment through
victimhood-chip-on-the-shoulder, Us-vs-Them mentality. The are trying
to outshout and out-whine the very feminist they hate.

Maybe they need to examine there immortals words "We have met the
enemy... and he is us" Pogo

They are engaging in what those who are recovering from abuse call
abuse-sizing. My abuse was worse than your abuse thinking.

It doesn't promote recovery among the victims of abuse and I doubt
it is promoting health among those engaging in it here.

"The pure and simple truth is rarely pure
and never simple." -- Oscar Wilde


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits

dragonlady wrote:
In article , Bob
wrote:


dragonlady wrote:

Bob did.

Bob has consistently said that he doesn't think adultry hurts a marriage.

Uh, no. That wasn't what Bob said. Bob said that adultry often doesn't
hurt a marriage as much as jealousy, spite, vindictiveness, malice,
feminism, and *******s.

You would probably be better posting your own opinion and not trying to
paraphrase someone else's opinion.

Bob




Bob, you demanded that I show that adultery hurt a marriage, and
insisted that there was no harm if the person wasn't caught.

Bob suggests that you take a remedial reading class as well as
restricting yourself to posting your own opinions.

Bob pointed out that dragonlady can not point to any particular harm
that adultery (of itself) does to a marriage.

Dragonlady posted the strawman about "no harm if the person wasn't
caught." Your straw man argument is your own.



If I misunderstood you, please clarify: is adultery harmful to a
marriage? Does it make a difference to you if it is a man committing
adultery or a woman?

Bob has consistently advocated equal rights and equal responsibilities.

Adultery (by itself) often cause less harm than jealousy, spite,
vindictiveness, malice, feminism, and *******s. Dragonlady could not
point to any harm that adultery does other than providing a convenient
excuse for jealousy, spite, vindictiveness, malice, feminism, and *******s.

In real life adultery is not all bad nor all good, nor the same in every
situation. In some dried up boring marriages adultery may add spice and
excitement to one partner who brings the renewed sexual energy home to
the marriage. It can help to "get your battery charged" and be a boon to
a marriage. In others situations it may provide an excuse for a
feminist looking for a reason to leave her boring marriage and justify
(in her mind) hurting her children.

Bob finds that moralizing and criticizing generally doesn't consider the
particular situation and often only adds to the potential for harm.



Assume that there are NO children conceived or STD's brought into the
marriage. Assume, if you like, that they don't get caught. Is adultery
under those circumstances wrong and/or harmful to the marriage?
meh

Neither always harmful, nor always helpful. See above.

Note: Bob is not Christian and generally does not recognize the moral
dictates of that religions as given or "truth." Moral values often
vary a lot from one religion to the next, and quite often come down to
"do what you're told."

Bob

dragonlady wrote:
In article , Bob
wrote:



Whelping a ******* into a family is another matter entirely. A woman
out whoring needs to make better choices than to get pregnant and birth
a *******. There are technological options today so there is no excuse.

Bob


As I said, if both parties have agreed to non-monogomy, I have no
quarrel with whatever they do; we were talking about the sorts of
affairs to which one partner has NOT agreed.

Frequently such "NOT agreement" is a ruse for control and domination of
one's spouse. Bob observes that control and domination by either spouse
is often harmful to the relationship. Both would be better served by
supporting the emotional needs of his/her partner, and are poorly served
forcing lying by refusing to accept the partners real feelings.


You undermine your claim to stand for equality in relationships and
support for polyamory when you refer to the men as having affairs, and
the women as "out whoring".


What would you call it if you weren't beating around the bush?


While I agree that, *for both women and
men*, taking proper precautions to avoid pregnancy and STD's is
critical, I think you should use equally insulting or accepting terms to
refer to both men and women involved in polyamorous relationships.
meh

Would "out ****ing" be better?

Bob

Andre Lieven wrote:
Its so cute to see that you all, now that you've utterly FAILED to
prevail in debate, have now resorted to mutual masturbation fests,
where you decry what *you wish we had said*....


They always do that. The femroids need to reassure each other to keep
from having to think about how bigoted their beliefs are.

Bob

On Wed, 26 Nov 2003 14:32:11 -0700, Bob wrote:

You undermine your claim to stand for equality in relationships and
support for polyamory when you refer to the men as having affairs, and
the women as "out whoring".


What would you call it if you weren't beating around the bush?

Both men and women have affairs.

Or both men and women are *out whoring*

It's the same for both, Bob.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits

In article , Bob
wrote:

Andre Lieven wrote:
Its so cute to see that you all, now that you've utterly FAILED to
prevail in debate, have now resorted to mutual masturbation fests,
where you decry what *you wish we had said*....


They always do that. The femroids need to reassure each other to keep
from having to think about how bigoted their beliefs are.

Bob




Unlike the folks from soc.men, who never resort to just talking to each
other to reinforce their bizarre beliefs. . .
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

In article , Bob
wrote:

dragonlady wrote:
In article , Bob
wrote:



Whelping a ******* into a family is another matter entirely. A woman
out whoring needs to make better choices than to get pregnant and birth
a *******. There are technological options today so there is no excuse.

Bob


As I said, if both parties have agreed to non-monogomy, I have no
quarrel with whatever they do; we were talking about the sorts of
affairs to which one partner has NOT agreed.

Frequently such "NOT agreement" is a ruse for control and domination of
one's spouse. Bob observes that control and domination by either spouse
is often harmful to the relationship. Both would be better served by
supporting the emotional needs of his/her partner, and are poorly served
forcing lying by refusing to accept the partners real feelings.

IOW, if someone can't manage to keep their vows and their infidelity
hurts the marriage, it's really the fault of the spouse who WAS
faithful, for not . . . for not, what, exactly? For not saying, "or
poor baby I'm glad you were out screwing someone else since that's what
you seemed to need?




You undermine your claim to stand for equality in relationships and
support for polyamory when you refer to the men as having affairs, and
the women as "out whoring".


What would you call it if you weren't beating around the bush?


While I agree that, *for both women and
men*, taking proper precautions to avoid pregnancy and STD's is
critical, I think you should use equally insulting or accepting terms to
refer to both men and women involved in polyamorous relationships.
meh

Would "out ****ing" be better?

Bob




I don't care what you call it -- I just want language that is equally
offensive (or inoffensive) for referring to what BOTH men and women do
when they have sex outside of their marriage vows.
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

toto wrote:
On Wed, 26 Nov 2003 14:32:11 -0700, Bob wrote:


You undermine your claim to stand for equality in relationships and
support for polyamory when you refer to the men as having affairs, and
the women as "out whoring".


What would you call it if you weren't beating around the bush?


Both men and women have affairs.

Or both men and women are *out whoring*

It's the same for both, Bob.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits



Another grammar flame. How enlightened.

Bob

In article , dragonlady
says...

In article , Bob
wrote:

Andre Lieven wrote:
Its so cute to see that you all, now that you've utterly FAILED to
prevail in debate, have now resorted to mutual masturbation fests,
where you decry what *you wish we had said*....


They always do that. The femroids need to reassure each other to keep
from having to think about how bigoted their beliefs are.

Bob




Unlike the folks from soc.men, who never resort to just talking to each
other to reinforce their bizarre beliefs. . .
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care



LOL. Oh but the think it's different when they do it... after all, *what* is
'soc.men'?

Banty