double trouble

I have 6 year old twins. I home school them. They seem to get in
trouble very easy. For example.... This week they decided to take the
mail out of the neighbors mailbox and thorw it in their garbage cans.
How do I punish them? If I leave them in a room longer then 10 mintues
they will destroy it. They can play simple games with out fighting.
They think of any way to cause trouble. If I ask them to do something
they turn to me and say no I don't want to and they do what they want.
Is this a phase or more. Can anyone help me out. I also have 3 other
children that do not have these problems.

Amanda

As the mother of 6 1/2 year old triplets (GBB) I would have to say that
this most definitely is not a phase. I haven't had this problem with
any of mine. They know better, lol.

You asked "how do I punish them?" and mentioned something about
putting them in their room and what happens. Is this the extent of
their punishing? Before I tell you what I would do, I guess I should
ask what you are doing to punish them at this point. What are your
methods of punishment with the boys?

Tonya
Mommy to 6 1/2 yr old GBB Triplets

They have time out for 6 minutes quietly. If not quiet then after the
6 minutes is up it starts again. They have to go to their room if
they have broken or destroyed something. They have no toys and are
earning them back.

I do the time out thing on occasion. I am not a big fan of it for the
most part. It does work ON OCCASION. I have a 7 year old step son
that lives with us every other week and that is what his mother does
and I have to tell you he is the most rotten brat I have ever met in my
life when she is around - and I have met a lot of kids. It doesn't
phase him at all to have to sit in time out for 5-10 minutes. He
doesn't get time outs at our house - he gets his tail spanked. He says
"yes ma'am" and "no sir" and isn't as mean and hateful at our house as
he is hers either. He won't say "yes maam" and the like at her house
either. It's "yeah" and "huh" and "what" and more than anything "NO!".
I mean, she can't control him and all I have to do is look at him and
he knows that he had better act right. It is all in what he knows he
can get away with. Mama makes him sit in his room - big deal. I spank
his tail. Which is worse? Which gets more respect and better behavior
in the end? You guessed it - mine does. They are going to push the
limits, there is no question there - but it is all a matter of how far
they know that they can get. If they know that the worst that is going
to happen to them is that they are going to have to sit in their room -
how bad is that?

I have demanded respect and obedience from mine since before they could
speak. NO means NO. I am the Mama - I am the one in charge. Not
these little people. This may sound harsh to you but it sure does
work. Kids need schedule and structure and rules and consequences. If
there are no consequences for their actions you aren't doing your job -
which is preparing these children for LIFE. Life isn't fair and
lying/disobeying/destroying things isn't fair. There is no respect for
others if they are destroying others property. The consequences have
to fit the crime though. Before you know it they will be driving and
on their own. Babying them and not disciplining them isn't preparing
them for the real world. I don't think it is fair to them. Am I
saying that if one hits the other one that the one being hit should hit
back? No, I am not saying that. I am just saying that time outs don't
work. They obviously aren't at your house. If it's not broken, don't
fix it, but if it is, which from what I read from your email, it is -
you need to find something else besides what you are doing to solve the
problem.

Talking ugly or screaming at each other? Wash their mouth out with
soap. Make them do chores that you know they don't want to do. (Help
you with laundry/dishwasher, etc.- they are not too young for this)
Spank that tail. Something besides what you have been doing, since
that obviously isn't working.

I hope I wasn't too harsh.