my AC has these irrational fears

my AC is almost 5 yo and has been becoming more and more afraid of
things that were previously liked. right now it's nightmares about
wheels. AC wakes up crying about steering wheels on real cars and the
self-moving wheels on the shake-and-go car set that was a xmas present
much wished for and enjoyed on xmas day. AC got a stuffed dinosaur and
has some dinosaur pjs but doesn't want them 'cause AC is afraid of
dinos now (just a few months ago loved 'em).

the part of me wants to basically tell AC to suck it up and get over
it, that it's a ploy for attention. but it's awfully hard to not cuddle
& comfort the kid. the multi-times per night 'nightmares' are getting
ridiculous. and every week or so it's something new.

during the day, it turns into comments of "no, i don't want that, i'm
afraid of it" about previously favorite toys, activities, or even
clothes.

yet to me, it doesn't seem like a real terror response. i'm terrified
of big fuzzy moths and if one's in the house, i go into a full-on panic
attack. AC's fears are more flat and seem almost made up to fit the
moment. i went into AC's room last night and asked what's the matter,
why all the groaning and moaning and calling out for daddy. and it was
almost like AC had to think about it before coming up with something
and wound up with the wheels thing again.

AC has a little sib who is almost 3 and who does have occasional
screaming full-on night terrors. AC had them too at around the 2-3 age
but outgrew them. maybe AC is jealous of my coming in to little sib's
crib at night and is trying to come up with nightmares that will get
daddy to come in on AC's behalf too?

so, i'm looking for advice. how should i handle these fears? are they
real or attention getters?

nola sahd

"nola stay-at-home dad" wrote in message
ps.com...
my AC is almost 5 yo and has been becoming more and more afraid of
things that were previously liked. right now it's nightmares about
wheels. AC wakes up crying about steering wheels on real cars and the
self-moving wheels on the shake-and-go car set that was a xmas present
much wished for and enjoyed on xmas day. AC got a stuffed dinosaur and
has some dinosaur pjs but doesn't want them 'cause AC is afraid of
dinos now (just a few months ago loved 'em).

the part of me wants to basically tell AC to suck it up and get over
it, that it's a ploy for attention. but it's awfully hard to not cuddle
& comfort the kid. the multi-times per night 'nightmares' are getting
ridiculous. and every week or so it's something new.

during the day, it turns into comments of "no, i don't want that, i'm
afraid of it" about previously favorite toys, activities, or even
clothes.

yet to me, it doesn't seem like a real terror response. i'm terrified
of big fuzzy moths and if one's in the house, i go into a full-on panic
attack. AC's fears are more flat and seem almost made up to fit the
moment. i went into AC's room last night and asked what's the matter,
why all the groaning and moaning and calling out for daddy. and it was
almost like AC had to think about it before coming up with something
and wound up with the wheels thing again.

AC has a little sib who is almost 3 and who does have occasional
screaming full-on night terrors. AC had them too at around the 2-3 age
but outgrew them. maybe AC is jealous of my coming in to little sib's
crib at night and is trying to come up with nightmares that will get
daddy to come in on AC's behalf too?

so, i'm looking for advice. how should i handle these fears? are they
real or attention getters?


He wouldn't be making up nightmares if they wake him up in the first place.
He may not know exactly what he's scared of, and when you ask him he feels
he needs to give you an answer, so he'll say it's something else, then
convince himself that's what he's scared of. Nightmares are often more
about the feelings than the actual objects. Fears of all sorts of things
are common at this age. Let him know there's no reason to be afraid, but if
he is, understand that he can't help the way he feels. He'll outgrow it,
but he needs plenty of support.

There may be an unknown fear of abandonment or jealousy. But I don't think
he's making it up.


Jen