Yet another media strike against AP!

Stephanie and Tim wrote:

"Marie" wrote in message
...


ted wrote in message . ..


Meanwhile, this child has been deprived of the inestimable benefit of


learning


that he was not a member of the wedding, that the marriage is not a


threesome.


Who is this guy? Does he know what he's talking about? What a horrible


thing to say!

The only thing I've ever agreed with him about is toilet training.
Everything else is really stupid sounding, cold-hearted and mean.
Some people really have a big problem with children in the "marriage" bed.
Strange, b/c dh and I have a marriage everywhere we are, not just in our
bedroom.
Ha, my kids were part of my wedding ;o) Guess that means it's ok for them


to


sleep with us?
Marie





Well, I have no problem with other people who want to cosleep safely. But
this newsgroup gets to be a pretty unfriendly place regarding the issue of
cosleeping sometimes. *I* like having no children in our bed. Like the Ted
Bundy (or someone) comment above. Should this group be renamed radical AP
instead? If so, I will take my bf issues elsewhere when my baby is born.

S





I think there are plenty of people on this newsgroup who weren't too
fond of co-sleeping.
I'm one of them. We did it for awhile with my first child because it
was the best way
to get her to sleep, but it was terrible for *our* sleep. The heck with
the marriage bed;
I wanted the sleeping bed. I lucked out with the 2nd, who never
minded a crib.

Clisby


Clisby

Of course, with Rosemond, it is no surprise that he has yet another article
against an AP tenet, but this one I think is bad. Grandma needs to mind her
own business. It's not the parents who are writing in complaining! Access it
at www.rosemond.com

July 8, 2003
John's Weekly Column: 07/08/2003
"The Family Bed"

by John Rosemond

Q: My 2-year-old grandson has slept with his parents since he was born, but
with the birth of a third child (he has a 4-year-old sister), he was moved to a
bed of his own in an adjoining room. Since he refuses to cooperate in the new
sleeping arrangements, either my son or daughter-in-law rocks him to sleep,
which might take an hour or more. Then, without fail, he wakes up in the middle
of the night and goes to his parents' bed where the new baby is sleeping. The
parents try to make him go back to his bed, but oftentimes, the father goes to
the other room to sleep. At other times, the 2-year-old wakes up his older
sister and together they wake up the entire house with their shenanigans. What
can a grandma do to help in a situation like this?



A: Let this be a lesson to all who are reading this that while the "family bed"
may seem warm and fuzzy, it often devolves into chaos of this sort. If this
2-year-old had been trained to sleep in his own bed since birth, this would not
be happening. Assuming no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be a
well-adjusted child who was perfectly content with a room and a bed of his own.

Despite the claims of "family bed" advocates, not one study done by an
objective researcher has demonstrated benefit in either the short- or long-term
to the children so bedded. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends
against the practice, noting that infants are sometimes smothered by parents
who inadvertently roll over on them in the night or as a result of getting
tangled in king size sheets and blankets.

Rarely do I meet a father who has chosen to initiate this unnecessary practice.
It's nearly always the mother's call, and the mother in question is almost
invariably one who has bought into the propaganda that bedding with her child
promotes mother-child bonding. If the other moms in her social group are
bedding with their kids, she feels the additional pressure of not wanting to be
the most "un-bonded" mom in the neighborhood.

There are no two ways about it, a child who sleeps with his parents develops a
dependency upon sleeping with his parents, one that comes back to haunt all
concerned when the parents decide the child's presence in the bed has become
inconvenient.

Meanwhile, this child has been deprived of the inestimable benefit of learning
that he was not a member of the wedding, that the marriage is not a threesome.

During my private practice years, I saw a lot of these kids. They were, as a
rule, not happy campers. The parents in the above question are obviously slow
learners as they're making the same mistake with the newborn.

What can Grandma do to help? She can say, "When you would like some
old-fashioned advice from an old-fashioned older woman who is obviously out of
step with the times, don't hesitate to ask." While she's waiting for her son
and daughter-in-law to come to their senses, she might consider cutting this
column out of her local paper and mailing it to her them in a plain brown
envelope, sans return address.


koa
Still nursing James, 02/06/01
EP'ing for Joey 04/02/03 (BCP)

John Rosemond wrote in a column:

Assuming no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be a
well-adjusted child who was perfectly content with a room and a bed of his
own.

Well, duh. If no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be the perfect
child, no? At least he'd look like one.

Anyone remember Pet Rocks? I think some people ought to have Rock Babies. They
do behave themselves awfully well, and you don't have to rock them -- they're
already permanently rocked :-)

--Helen

In article , (H
Schinske) writes:

Assuming no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be a
well-adjusted child who was perfectly content with a room and a bed of his
own.

Well, duh. If no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be the perfect
child, no? At least he'd look like one.

Anyone remember Pet Rocks? I think some people ought to have Rock Babies.
They
do behave themselves awfully well, and you don't have to rock them -- they're
already permanently rocked :-)

Heh, I wonder if Ted Bundy or Jeffery Dahmer slept all nite content in their
rooms? Being content all nite in a room of your own does not mean a child is
well-adjusted in other areas as well.

"He was a quiet guy, kept pretty much to himself. Never complained. . . "
Sound familiar?

koa
Still nursing James, 02/06/01
EP'ing for Joey 04/02/03 (BCP)

Karen Askey wrote:

During my private practice years, I saw a lot of these kids. They were, as a
rule, not happy campers. The parents in the above question are obviously slow
learners as they're making the same mistake with the newborn.

Really? I guess StupidHead didn't think that the 2yo is doing it cause
he wants the attention that the newborn's getting.

E

"Elana" wrote in message
...
Karen Askey wrote:

During my private practice years, I saw a lot of these kids. They were,
as a
rule, not happy campers. The parents in the above question are obviously
slow
learners as they're making the same mistake with the newborn.

Really? I guess StupidHead didn't think that the 2yo is doing it cause
he wants the attention that the newborn's getting.

sarcasmRight, and I suppose that two-year olds who have been "trained from
birth" to sleep in their own bed in their own room *never* display any
attention-getting behavior when a new sibling arrives./sarcasm

Belphoebe

Meanwhile, this child has been deprived of the inestimable benefit of learning
that he was not a member of the wedding, that the marriage is not a threesome.



Who is this guy? Does he know what he's talking about? What a horrible thing to say!

ted wrote in message . ..
Meanwhile, this child has been deprived of the inestimable benefit of
learning
that he was not a member of the wedding, that the marriage is not a
threesome.



Who is this guy? Does he know what he's talking about? What a horrible
thing to say!

The only thing I've ever agreed with him about is toilet training.
Everything else is really stupid sounding, cold-hearted and mean.
Some people really have a big problem with children in the "marriage" bed.
Strange, b/c dh and I have a marriage everywhere we are, not just in our
bedroom.
Ha, my kids were part of my wedding ;o) Guess that means it's ok for them to
sleep with us?
Marie

"Karen Askey" wrote in message
...
In article ,
(H
Schinske) writes:

Assuming no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be a
well-adjusted child who was perfectly content with a room and a bed of
his
own.

Well, duh. If no other behavior problems had developed, he'd be the
perfect
child, no? At least he'd look like one.

Anyone remember Pet Rocks? I think some people ought to have Rock Babies.
They
do behave themselves awfully well, and you don't have to rock them --
they're
already permanently rocked :-)

Heh, I wonder if Ted Bundy or Jeffery Dahmer slept all nite content in
their
rooms? Being content all nite in a room of your own does not mean a child
is
well-adjusted in other areas as well.

"He was a quiet guy, kept pretty much to himself. Never complained. . . "
Sound familiar?

koa
Still nursing James, 02/06/01
EP'ing for Joey 04/02/03 (BCP)


Right, if you child sleeps in his own room, then he is going to grow up to
be an ax murder because his mother did not love him. That must be it.

S

"Marie" wrote in message
...
ted wrote in message . ..
Meanwhile, this child has been deprived of the inestimable benefit of
learning
that he was not a member of the wedding, that the marriage is not a
threesome.



Who is this guy? Does he know what he's talking about? What a horrible
thing to say!

The only thing I've ever agreed with him about is toilet training.
Everything else is really stupid sounding, cold-hearted and mean.
Some people really have a big problem with children in the "marriage" bed.
Strange, b/c dh and I have a marriage everywhere we are, not just in our
bedroom.
Ha, my kids were part of my wedding ;o) Guess that means it's ok for them
to
sleep with us?
Marie



Well, I have no problem with other people who want to cosleep safely. But
this newsgroup gets to be a pretty unfriendly place regarding the issue of
cosleeping sometimes. *I* like having no children in our bed. Like the Ted
Bundy (or someone) comment above. Should this group be renamed radical AP
instead? If so, I will take my bf issues elsewhere when my baby is born.

S