Morning sickness

Yikes. I didn't have this much this early in my first pregnancy, but at 7-8
weeks now I am soooooo soooo sick on my stomach, it's much worse than
before. I am so afraid it's not going to go away. What I do remember from my
first is having worse nausea at the first trimester and it came back in the
last few weeks.

I am doing all the same tips as I did first time but they simply do not
work- B6, ginger, eating small but often, not getting an empty stomach, etc.

Worse, I seem to have excessive fatigure and NO stamina or energy, and I can
barely crawl out of bed. I also seem to be having nausea to the extent of
having **motion sickness**, as I can't drive a car without feeling sick and
the same thing happens when I stand at a pool or even the bathtub and see
the water moving, I feel sick and dizzy.

I don't think I am having blood pressure problems and my appointment is in a
few days. But yikes, I feel SO bad. I felt ok at all my doctor's
appointments last time, even the one 2 days before I gave birth. THIS time I
don't see how in the heck I am going to feel like forcing myself to get up
and GO to even my first appointment, I am so damn tired. Is it normal to
have NO energy at 8 weeks? None, zip, zilch, nada. I have been clsoe to
tears because my 3 year old needs me and I find myself asking her to let me
lie down and rest a lot, I feel so bad. It seems like all day long I am
saying "Oh sweetie, please understand that mama doesn't feel well and I need
to rest", or "I know you want to go to the store but I am going to have to
nap now" etc. I never felt anywhere near this the first time.

There are a few pregnant people right now that I know work full time and I
feel miserable, I couldn't do this. I am just way too sick. I am not
depressed just physically run-down feeling, but I actually am afraid this is
going to depress me. I realize I need to rest as much as I feel I need to
but I feel awful that I have no energy, like I am letting everyone down. not
to mention, I am not having a very good time doing nothing myself.

Ack............and I think I need go throw up now too. I hope this does away
at 3 month like everyone says it will. I am startoing to worry I may end up
in the hospital because I am not able to eat and I am throwing up fluids.
ugh.

I just want to say it feels like forever before I will be able to feel
normal again. It sounds awful but I have decided I cannot experience another
pregnancy. This is a depressing thought, but an honest fact at the moment.

I need to feel normal again- no puking, no nausea, and have energy.

beyond the pale wrote:
I just want to say it feels like forever before I will be able to feel
normal again. It sounds awful but I have decided I cannot experience another
pregnancy. This is a depressing thought, but an honest fact at the moment.

I need to feel normal again- no puking, no nausea, and have energy.

I know that one... Call your doctor and ask about medication for the
nausea. Here in Germany you can get Vomex it's safe during pregnancy,
but it has some side effects, for me it was mainly constipation. And by
constipation I mean _constipation_ as in straining on the toilet to the
point where you think your head will explode... I would take breaks from
the vomex, deal with the vomiting and nausea and at elast get some
relief from the constipation... Not ideal, but better than throwing up
every half hour.
I also spent my days and nights in bed. See if you can find a babysitter
for your 3 y.o. or maybe one of your friends or relatives can take her
for a bit every now and then? I know it's really really hard, but it
will pass eventually.
I'm not going to have a third because morning sickness was bad with Sam
and it was bad with this one (hospital twice, for over a week each time
with Sam, once for just 4 days with this one, but this time I got
medication for at home, with Sam I didn't) and I can't imagine ever
going through with this again. It was bad with one 6 y.o. who plays well
without me (he visits the neighbours kids and plays outside and in his
room) but you know, a next time will involve two "older" kids, and
that's just not happening.

Just make sure your husband realizes that you're not the only woman on
the planet who's having a hard time in her frist trimester, and that it
might not suddenly be over when you cross the trimester border into
trimester nr2. Don't let people put you down just because you're
pregnant and because this one isn't going as smooth as your first, or as
their 5th or whatever. You are who you are and this pregnancy is what it
is, comparing pregnancies works as well as comparing babies does, i.e.
it doesn't.
The more you worry and the worse you feel emotionally the worse your
nausea is going to get (at least that's the case with me). So try to
focus on the pregnancy and the baby and ignore people who tell you
you've just got to get up and into the fresh air more "Because I'd be
feeling sick too if all I did was lay in bed.". Send them home, don't
put up with them, and you might need to remind your husband that without
him you would not be in this situation, so he can suck it up and help
with the household chores ;-)

Honestly, it will get better eventually. It might take medication and it
might take a bit more than 3 months, but eventually it'll be over.

take care
nicole

"NL" wrote
It was bad with one 6 y.o. who plays well
without me (he visits the neighbours kids and plays outside and in his
room) but you know, a next time will involve two "older" kids, and that's
just not happening.


I understand this. I actually really wanted a #3, and was disappointed we
waited so long for a #2 (I wanted DD to be only 2 years older at most to a
second), but it just worked out this way. I had no idea how difficult it
would be to feel the effects of pregnancy while also having a toddler, but I
thought a 3 year old would be easier than, for example, having a pregnancy
and a younger baby still in diapers. but actually, diapers aside, a younger
kid is not going to say "I don't like you, mama. The sun is up and we are
supposed to be outside, I want to go outside to playyy! Get up!" I feel
awful. It is more stressful, for sure.

Also more stressful, I need medications much earlier this time than I did
with #1. With #1 I made it through the first trimester/developmental phase
without meds. This time, I called my OB and had to start taking an
antihistamine and sudafed again at 5-6 weeks along. I feel horribly guilty
for this but I simply could not have panic attacks due to nasal congestion
night after night (the OB is still surprised I can take sudafed at bedtime
and get *good* sleep, but the *only* way I can sleep is to be able to
breathe through my nose). So, I am stressed over my DD and her care, as well
as not being able to do anything for me ebcause I am too sick to drive much
or shop. And then I am worried about taking medication in my first
trimester. My nose is stopped up in the daytime too but I simply don't take
naps, so that I can use sudafed as sparingly as possible and get a
panic-free night of sleep. This way I only use sudafed at bedtime but I use
it every night and I will always worry if this could cause harm. My OB knows
it and approved it but still.

Well, my DD is turning out to be more stress than I could have guessed, and
it is because I am feeling sensitive to her especially right now. I had my
parents come to supposedly help me one day and my DD has behaved pretty bad
ever since. It's usually just me and her and she's pretty good, but because
I am not able to be active with her much I wanted them to come spend the day
and just focus on playing with her. IOW, not help me with housework or lift
a finger to help, just be here for her. For some reason after they came my
DD has started smartmouthing me and I cannot figure out why. With my parents
here while my husband was at work, they came just to play with her, so I
stayed in bed all day, nauseous. This is ok right, since they came to take
care of her? You'd think. But after they went home my DD started yelling at
me. "I don't like you as good mommy! You are not playing with me so you just
get out, go into another room and stay away from me!" and DD said other
things like that all day and today too. "Grandma is better than you! You're
not special anymore!" I am pretty upset. She never said anything like this
until now. I am afraid my parents said something to cause this. Why? I don't
know, it doesn't sound rational, but I did hear my mother (who, yes, can be
a hen!) say to my daughter "Play with me now, and tell your mama to go lay
down". and some other things. I don't quite know what to do about this. I
don't want them helping anymore if my DD is going to act this way after. She
does not do this when the other grandparents are here. Does anyone have any
idea what causes this? I am not a toddler psychologist. I know that my mom
can be critical, and she possibly makes such comments around my DD but I
can't understand how my DD can turn on me and behave so out of character
after just one visit of a few hours, where I took a nap. ?? Honestly I am
too nauseous to worry about it right now, and my daughter is at that stage
where kids do have outbursts. She says "I don't like you!" if she doesn't
get her way then she's cuddling up to you 10 minutes later telling you she
loves you. That's normal. But I am really irritated at how after my parents
left she was the worst behaved I have ever seen her. I was asleep so I don't
know what went on. My mom seems to like it when my DD yells at me, she just
says something like "Oh she's attached to her Grandma, she
s grandma's girl". I asked my husband if he actually thought my mom
encouraged her to say some things. He probably thinks I am crazy. I think,
though, that my parents rarely ever spend time with her- they don't live too
far away but they never come to see her- so it seems to me sometimes they
try to overcompensate for that. One other thing I noticed in the small time
I was awake, they don't make her follow my rules when they watch her, so
when they leave it feels like they have undone a lot of the discipline I
have worked hard to get my DD to have. It's minor, but I walked out of the
room to get a drink and I noticed that my daughter had her straw out of her
own cup and was drinking water out of my mom's cup. My DD has her own cup,
she's 3. I said "Why is her straw out of her cup??" and my mom said "She
didn't want her water, she wanted mine"- like that explains it. Now my DD is
giving me problems over her cup, she doesn't want to use her own cup. Great,
a better chance of catching a cold (my parents seem to get sick a lot). Big
deal? Maybe not, but irrititating- YES, because there's simply no good
reason why I have to work with my DD on using her own cup every time my
parents watch her. The same thing happened with the potty. Someone usually
goes with my DD to help her potty and clean up, but except for me, she does
not go with someone ELSE to potty. My mother started leaving the bathroom
door wide open while she herself goes and letting my DD run in and out of
there. I asked her to stop this, as there is no reason for my DD to walk in
on someone else using the bathroom when she doesn't have to use it. However
she continues leaving the door open while she goes and allowing my DD in and
out, and NOW after they have left, my DD has started to yell at my husband
and me when we go use the bathroom and shut the door. I ahgve explained to
her that grown ups close the door when they potty/ She said "Grandma
doesn't!! You a bad girl mommy!". I just don't want her running wild in the
room when I am just trying to use it for a second. It's the little things
like this, after grandma comes, that all seem to fall to hell. Now, we can
have company over and she will scream outside the bathroom door, which is
not okay to me. I asked my mother to stop it and I told her "You don't leave
the door open when you use the bathroom at your friends' houses, stop doing
it here, and my husband doesn't want to see it anyway. DD needs to learn
better manners." She says it is helping her to potty train by showing her
what to do-- DD has been potty trained for months!

Pregnancy brings out the crazy in people. None of that is big deals but it
has caused little problems around here. My DD is normal for a 3 year old but
she was over a lot of this type of thing months ago. I expected her to
regress a little with a baby on the way, but she only regresses around the
grandparents who let her. If they would stop it, it'd be over. (They also
give her candy before mealtimes, then she won't eat healthy food anymore).
They say it's their right to spoil her. My husband said thank goodness they
never come to see her but twice a year. I think this makes it worse though,
If they came more often but made her behave on the important things, I say
she wouldn't be acting up like she does. It makes me not want to ask them to
help watch her while I am morning sick any more.

Hey, our parents must be related!

My mom doesn't leave the bathroom door open though, but they do use a
totally different set of rules around Sam and it screws me up a lot.
It's geting better as he's getting older because he understands that
different households have different rules, but oh boy I could sometimes
kill the lot of them.

My mom insists I don't discipline him enough because he acts out _around
her_. Well, sorry mom, but if you can't tell him NO it's not my fault.
Sam knows really well that when I say No I mean it. I don't mean maybe
or maybe later or probably yes if you keep naging enough, I mean NO. No
Way.
Same with my brother, he'll let Sam watch TV during dinner and then he
wonders why Sam doesn't eat. Well, what does he expect?! My mom
complains how Sam never finishes his plate, but the first thing she does
when she puts his plate in front of him is say "If you finish all this
food I've got desert for you" and he _knows_ he'll get desert no matter
how much he eats, because she bargains with him. In the end he has to
eat a spoon full, say he's done and he'll get desert. Great, mom!
With me there's no such thing as desert. You can have ice cream as a
snack later if you've been good, but lunch and dinner are meals that we
sit down together for and I expect you to eat at least some of it. If
you tell me you want a whole sandwich I expect you to eat it and if you
tell me after one bite you're full you're definitely not getting
anything else. But with my mom she'll keep suggesting other things,
she'll even go and cook something different just for him.
Then she insists I have to have lunch on the table by the time Sam gets
home from school. Sam goes to school from 8-11:20. He has breakfast at
home and a second breakfast at school at around 9. He is not going to be
hungry again at 11:30! No matter what I cook, he will just not ever eat
much of it, so I might as well cook around 2 when we're both hungry, but
nooooooooooo, that's not the right time to have lunch! Well, I don't
give a rats. We eat when we're hungry and not when the clock tells us to.
But anyway, my parenty wated Sam for the easter holidays. 2 full weeks.
I was not to come with him (they live in austria now) because "We really
don't have enugh room for you" (they have a house. I'm small. It's not
like I need a room of my own, but saying "We can't handle being with you
for two weeks" aparently wasn't polite *g*) Anyway. I said no, he can't
come without me. They bribed _him_ to bargain with me! I just get so mad
about stuff like that. I'm the mom, I say what goes and what doesn't. If
they want to raise another kid they better go and make another one
themselves.


What I'm trying to say: Find someone who will truly help you and not
someone who'll just make it all worse. I know I need two weeks for every
week Sam spends with his grandparents to get him back on track, and
that's just not worth it.
I know it's hard, but she won't die from neglect if she has to play by
herself for a while each day and she won't die if you don't go outside
with her every single day either. And even if she tells you you're a bad
mom and she doesn't love you no more, that's just _right now_ because
she's not getting what she wants. She still loves you just as much as
before, she's just a lot more confused by what's going on.
I know it's not perfect, but I have the DVD-player in my bedroom and if
I'm feeling really yucky I ask my son if he wants to watch a movie with
me and we watch a movie in my bed, I usually doze off for most of it,
but that's ok with him because I'm right there and he gets to watch a
movie (we don't have a propper TV, just the DVD player, and since it's
in my room he doesn't get to watch a lot of movies, so it's a special
treat for him.).

Just remember, this is temporary. You won't feel like this until she's
18. She'll have to deal with you being busy a lot as soon as the new
baby's out and what's happening now will prepare her for that.
Nothing's ever perfect, just do what you can with what you have with
where you are. She knows you love her, she loves you, too, and chances
are she won't spend the rest of her life in therapy just because you had
morning sickness.

take care
nicole

have you tried acupuncture? you seem to have an awful lot of "mild"
problems, I say mild because though I realise they are horrific for you,
you're not dehydrated or putting anyone at risk and that's the kind of thing
acupuncture is very good for, it usually gets positive results in medical
research, more so than things like chiropractic.

Anne

Anne Rogers wrote:

have you tried acupuncture? you seem to have an awful lot of "mild"
problems, I say mild because though I realise they are horrific for you,
you're not dehydrated or putting anyone at risk

Are we reading different posts? The one you're responding to is a woman
dizzy, severely fatigued, feeling "motion sick" constantly, unable to
drive, having difficulty getting out of bed sometimes, unable to eat,
and vomiting fluids. Maybe I misread or misunderstood something, but
from the story so far, I'd suggest some medical attention ASAP.

Lara

Are we reading different posts? The one you're responding to is a woman
dizzy, severely fatigued, feeling "motion sick" constantly, unable to
drive, having difficulty getting out of bed sometimes, unable to eat,
and vomiting fluids. Maybe I misread or misunderstood something, but
from the story so far, I'd suggest some medical attention ASAP.

I took it as she wasn't actually throwing up, I read the original post again
and it still is unclear, if your summary is correct, then yes medical
attention is definitely warranted. If that needs treatment, then get that
sorted, but the whole bigger picture presented in this and other posts it
really does strike me that acupuncture might help, see this article
http://pregnancytoday.com/reference/...cupuncture.htm which points to
research showing it's effectiveness in not just nausea, but full blown
hyperemesis gravidarum and also helps fatigue. The problem with a lot of
drug treatments is that they will not help fatigue and likely hinder it. So
yes, if it is severe nausea right now that is causing dehydration, then get
help, now, go to the ER if necessary, but in the long term don't rule out
things just because they aren't mainstream.

Anne