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#21
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child support review objection
"Sarah Gray" wrote Gini wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote teachrmama wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote Chris wrote: Indeed! There exists not a SINGLE CP (mother) who is willing to swap positions with the NCP (father). Why? Because they know that they are RIPPING OFF the NCP. That's why! Yet they continue to foolishly proclaim that they are being "FAIR". Maybe some of these CP's actually enjoy spending time with their children. As opposed to my ex, who told me today that he will not be coming up to spend a few days with our daughter this weekend as planned, but instead will be coming later next week. He says it's "not safe" for him to make an eight-hour drive alone, so he's waiting until his dad is driving up later in the week. She is really disappointed that she can't stay with him while he is here, just spend a few hours after school Oh, but Sarah, what is more important? Spending time with dad (and ditching school) or going to school and having limited time with dad? chuckle (tongue in cheek) I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. No different after the split. I told him. He is upset that I have not mailed anything, but she has been insistent on saving stuff to give to him in person. The thing is, he insists that he wants to be this great dad, and that it's killing him that he "had" to move. But it's not as if there is a shortage of $9 an hour jobs here. And, frankly, if I were in his position, I would have already been doing what I could to have visited her a number of times already. I suggested renting a car and said that I would help with gas, and he came up with the above response (he doesn't have a car of his own). == I understand your frustration and his apparent wishywashieness (I just made that word up . My ex grew up in an emotionally devoid home. After we had kids, he learned what it was like to deeply love someone and it kinda threw him offguard. So, while he really really loved his babies, he sometimes really didn't know *how* to love them. So, when others might have seen him as uncaring, I knew better. Now, even though the boys are in their late 20s, he's right there for them with lots of hugs and "I love you's"--and they worship their dad. |
#22
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child support review objection
"teachrmama" wrote in message ... "Gini" wrote in message news:bA81j.6698$ht1.4377@trndny01... "teachrmama" wrote "Gini" wrote "Sarah Gray" wrote ...................................... I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. I have to agree. Sometimes they just don't understand the major impact they have. And I'm not sayig this in any sort of negative way. My husband is such a solution-finder. When our daughters were very young he commented that they were acting the same way he had seen some of his alcoholic relatives act, and he was concerned. I had to point out to him that they were acting exactly as 1-1/2 and 2-1/2 year olds were supposed to act. It was his alcoholic relatives that were acting inapproporiately. chuckle === Hehe--they can be pretty dense, eh? I remember my middle son sitting on the hood of our car with his suitcase waiting for his dad to arrive. After a while I called his dad and told him to get moving. It just didn't occur to him while he was sipping his third cup of coffee that the boy was sitting in the driveway waiting...waiting....(Now, if that were Moon, she would have been typing a letter to her ex [cc the court, of course] that the court had not authorized a change in the visitation schedule and that 24 hour's written notice was required for such change.) Yep, I'm sure she would have. But that path has not led her to where she wanted to go, has it? == Nope. And she has one helluva paper trail. |
#23
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child support review objection
teachrmama wrote:
"Sarah Gray" wrote in message ... Gini wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote teachrmama wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote Chris wrote: Indeed! There exists not a SINGLE CP (mother) who is willing to swap positions with the NCP (father). Why? Because they know that they are RIPPING OFF the NCP. That's why! Yet they continue to foolishly proclaim that they are being "FAIR". Maybe some of these CP's actually enjoy spending time with their children. As opposed to my ex, who told me today that he will not be coming up to spend a few days with our daughter this weekend as planned, but instead will be coming later next week. He says it's "not safe" for him to make an eight-hour drive alone, so he's waiting until his dad is driving up later in the week. She is really disappointed that she can't stay with him while he is here, just spend a few hours after school Oh, but Sarah, what is more important? Spending time with dad (and ditching school) or going to school and having limited time with dad? chuckle (tongue in cheek) I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. No different after the split. I told him. He is upset that I have not mailed anything, but she has been insistent on saving stuff to give to him in person. The thing is, he insists that he wants to be this great dad, and that it's killing him that he "had" to move. But it's not as if there is a shortage of $9 an hour jobs here. And, frankly, if I were in his position, I would have already been doing what I could to have visited her a number of times already. I suggested renting a car and said that I would help with gas, and he came up with the above response (he doesn't have a car of his own). It doesn't sound as if he has quite developed the knack of taking responsibility for his own choices yet. Do you have a video camera? Maybe seeing a video ov his daughter would motivate him to come up more often. I have a slew of videos uploaded to youtube that I have emailed him links to. -- Sarah Gray |
#24
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child support review objection
Gini wrote:
"Sarah Gray" wrote Gini wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote teachrmama wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote Chris wrote: Indeed! There exists not a SINGLE CP (mother) who is willing to swap positions with the NCP (father). Why? Because they know that they are RIPPING OFF the NCP. That's why! Yet they continue to foolishly proclaim that they are being "FAIR". Maybe some of these CP's actually enjoy spending time with their children. As opposed to my ex, who told me today that he will not be coming up to spend a few days with our daughter this weekend as planned, but instead will be coming later next week. He says it's "not safe" for him to make an eight-hour drive alone, so he's waiting until his dad is driving up later in the week. She is really disappointed that she can't stay with him while he is here, just spend a few hours after school Oh, but Sarah, what is more important? Spending time with dad (and ditching school) or going to school and having limited time with dad? chuckle (tongue in cheek) I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. No different after the split. I told him. He is upset that I have not mailed anything, but she has been insistent on saving stuff to give to him in person. The thing is, he insists that he wants to be this great dad, and that it's killing him that he "had" to move. But it's not as if there is a shortage of $9 an hour jobs here. And, frankly, if I were in his position, I would have already been doing what I could to have visited her a number of times already. I suggested renting a car and said that I would help with gas, and he came up with the above response (he doesn't have a car of his own). == I understand your frustration and his apparent wishywashieness (I just made that word up . My ex grew up in an emotionally devoid home. After we had kids, he learned what it was like to deeply love someone and it kinda threw him offguard. So, while he really really loved his babies, he sometimes really didn't know *how* to love them. So, when others might have seen him as uncaring, I knew better. Now, even though the boys are in their late 20s, he's right there for them with lots of hugs and "I love you's"--and they worship their dad. That is great how you guys have managed to maintain good relationships with your kids. I'm really hoping that my ex gets it together; As much as I cannot stand him, I want my daughter to have a decent relationship with her dad. -- Sarah Gray |
#25
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child support review objection
"Sarah Gray" wrote Gini wrote: ............................. == I understand your frustration and his apparent wishywashieness (I just made that word up . My ex grew up in an emotionally devoid home. After we had kids, he learned what it was like to deeply love someone and it kinda threw him offguard. So, while he really really loved his babies, he sometimes really didn't know *how* to love them. So, when others might have seen him as uncaring, I knew better. Now, even though the boys are in their late 20s, he's right there for them with lots of hugs and "I love you's"--and they worship their dad. That is great how you guys have managed to maintain good relationships with your kids. I'm really hoping that my ex gets it together; As much as I cannot stand him, I want my daughter to have a decent relationship with her dad. === There's nothing more precious than family and like it or not, when we have children, our ex's are family--forever. |
#26
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child support review objection
"Gini" wrote in message news:wT81j.6699$ht1.3843@trndny01... "teachrmama" wrote in message ... "Gini" wrote in message news:bA81j.6698$ht1.4377@trndny01... "teachrmama" wrote "Gini" wrote "Sarah Gray" wrote ...................................... I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. I have to agree. Sometimes they just don't understand the major impact they have. And I'm not sayig this in any sort of negative way. My husband is such a solution-finder. When our daughters were very young he commented that they were acting the same way he had seen some of his alcoholic relatives act, and he was concerned. I had to point out to him that they were acting exactly as 1-1/2 and 2-1/2 year olds were supposed to act. It was his alcoholic relatives that were acting inapproporiately. chuckle === Hehe--they can be pretty dense, eh? I remember my middle son sitting on the hood of our car with his suitcase waiting for his dad to arrive. After a while I called his dad and told him to get moving. It just didn't occur to him while he was sipping his third cup of coffee that the boy was sitting in the driveway waiting...waiting....(Now, if that were Moon, she would have been typing a letter to her ex [cc the court, of course] that the court had not authorized a change in the visitation schedule and that 24 hour's written notice was required for such change.) Yep, I'm sure she would have. But that path has not led her to where she wanted to go, has it? == Nope. And she has one helluva paper trail. So, is it just her nature to be that way? Or did today's system give her that extra measure of comfort she needed to behave in that manner? |
#27
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child support review objection
"Sarah Gray" wrote in message ... teachrmama wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote in message ... Gini wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote teachrmama wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote Chris wrote: Indeed! There exists not a SINGLE CP (mother) who is willing to swap positions with the NCP (father). Why? Because they know that they are RIPPING OFF the NCP. That's why! Yet they continue to foolishly proclaim that they are being "FAIR". Maybe some of these CP's actually enjoy spending time with their children. As opposed to my ex, who told me today that he will not be coming up to spend a few days with our daughter this weekend as planned, but instead will be coming later next week. He says it's "not safe" for him to make an eight-hour drive alone, so he's waiting until his dad is driving up later in the week. She is really disappointed that she can't stay with him while he is here, just spend a few hours after school Oh, but Sarah, what is more important? Spending time with dad (and ditching school) or going to school and having limited time with dad? chuckle (tongue in cheek) I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. No different after the split. I told him. He is upset that I have not mailed anything, but she has been insistent on saving stuff to give to him in person. The thing is, he insists that he wants to be this great dad, and that it's killing him that he "had" to move. But it's not as if there is a shortage of $9 an hour jobs here. And, frankly, if I were in his position, I would have already been doing what I could to have visited her a number of times already. I suggested renting a car and said that I would help with gas, and he came up with the above response (he doesn't have a car of his own). It doesn't sound as if he has quite developed the knack of taking responsibility for his own choices yet. Do you have a video camera? Maybe seeing a video ov his daughter would motivate him to come up more often. I have a slew of videos uploaded to youtube that I have emailed him links to. That's great. I'm sure she is a superstar!! |
#28
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child support review objection
teachrmama wrote:
"Sarah Gray" wrote in message I have a slew of videos uploaded to youtube that I have emailed him links to. That's great. I'm sure she is a superstar!! Oh for sure. Only 5 and already a diva! -- Sarah Gray |
#29
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child support review objection
"Gini" wrote in message news:LO81j.12663$Mg1.6005@trndny03... "Sarah Gray" wrote Gini wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote teachrmama wrote: "Sarah Gray" wrote Chris wrote: Indeed! There exists not a SINGLE CP (mother) who is willing to swap positions with the NCP (father). Why? Because they know that they are RIPPING OFF the NCP. That's why! Yet they continue to foolishly proclaim that they are being "FAIR". Maybe some of these CP's actually enjoy spending time with their children. As opposed to my ex, who told me today that he will not be coming up to spend a few days with our daughter this weekend as planned, but instead will be coming later next week. He says it's "not safe" for him to make an eight-hour drive alone, so he's waiting until his dad is driving up later in the week. She is really disappointed that she can't stay with him while he is here, just spend a few hours after school Oh, but Sarah, what is more important? Spending time with dad (and ditching school) or going to school and having limited time with dad? chuckle (tongue in cheek) I just hope he *does* come up next week, because she has really been looking forward to see him. I have a folder full of pictures and "letters" she insisted she had to give him in person. == Did you tell him that? There were times I had to "prompt" my ex to get his butt in gear. Some men just don't understand how their words/actions affect the kids. I had to prompt my ex when we lived together to understand the child's needs/feelings from time to time. No different after the split. I told him. He is upset that I have not mailed anything, but she has been insistent on saving stuff to give to him in person. The thing is, he insists that he wants to be this great dad, and that it's killing him that he "had" to move. But it's not as if there is a shortage of $9 an hour jobs here. And, frankly, if I were in his position, I would have already been doing what I could to have visited her a number of times already. I suggested renting a car and said that I would help with gas, and he came up with the above response (he doesn't have a car of his own). == I understand your frustration and his apparent wishywashieness (I just made that word up . My ex grew up in an emotionally devoid home. After we had kids, he learned what it was like to deeply love someone and it kinda threw him offguard. So, while he really really loved his babies, he sometimes really didn't know *how* to love them. So, when others might have seen him as uncaring, I knew better. Now, even though the boys are in their late 20s, he's right there for them with lots of hugs and "I love you's"--and they worship their dad. Same with my husband--very cold home environment growing up. My favorite picture is the first time he went out and played with the whiffle ball and bat with the girls when they were 6 and 7. I framed it and hung it on the wall. Before that, he was there, but not really there, if you know what I mean. That was a breakthrough moment for all of us. =c) |
#30
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child support review objection
"teachrmama" wrote "Gini" wrote "teachrmama" wrote "Gini" wrote ................................. === Hehe--they can be pretty dense, eh? I remember my middle son sitting on the hood of our car with his suitcase waiting for his dad to arrive. After a while I called his dad and told him to get moving. It just didn't occur to him while he was sipping his third cup of coffee that the boy was sitting in the driveway waiting...waiting....(Now, if that were Moon, she would have been typing a letter to her ex [cc the court, of course] that the court had not authorized a change in the visitation schedule and that 24 hour's written notice was required for such change.) Yep, I'm sure she would have. But that path has not led her to where she wanted to go, has it? == Nope. And she has one helluva paper trail. So, is it just her nature to be that way? Or did today's system give her that extra measure of comfort she needed to behave in that manner? == Considering the behavior is consistent over the years and profoundly pervasive, it appears to be her nature. |
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