Sad story

We can assume that she was aware of her problems if no registered midwife
would take her under any circomstances.

and, a Dr. told her the baby was breech before it was born. )

Jenny

"Donna Metler" wrote in message
. ..

"Ilse Witch" wrote in message
news
On Thu, 08 Jul 2004 06:34:25 +0000, Plissken wrote:

Sadly the baby had major complications during delivery and passed
away.
How
sad.

That's really sad. And unfortunately this type of stories will put home
births in a bad perspective. I wonder though, why none of the care
providers was able to change her mind. There is such good care
available,
this didn't need to happen.

It happens in hospitals too-none of the women in my pregnancy/infant loss
group had a home birth. Now, in some cases, like mine, complications were
evident before delivery, and therefore a hospital birth was indicated (but
still couldn't save the baby)-in others, everything was completely fine to
outer appearance, but something happened during labor/delivery itself-with
no good reason why. Unless a woman has had previous pregnancy
complications
or has pre-existing health issues, there's no reason to expect problems.



--
-- I
mommy to DS (July '02)
mommy to three tiny angels (28 Oct'03, 17 Feb'04 & 20 May'04)
guardian of DH (33)

"Jenny D" wrote in message
...
OMG... poor child... stupid woman.

You know, if her primary cesarean was anything like MINE (and mine wasn't as
bad as some I've heard), maybe she simply never wanted to set foot in a
hospital again. I've been there, done that. Wound up with another cesarean
anyway. But come on, before you call this woman stupid, maybe consider that
it's just possible she'd been so traumatised she'd rather risk losing her
next baby than go through that again. You know?

I pity her. I grieve with her.

--angela

I would never risk loosing my baby... no matted how traumatized I was. My
baby comes first before anything. If a doctor told me that I would have to
give birth upside down while jabbing a fork in my eye so that my baby can be
safe... I would do it.

She killed her child; she's a murderer.

The only excuse she may possibly have is if she did so for some religious
reason.

I understand that you disagree, and that's ok, I am a very extreme person
(especially when pregnant) but I these types of things sicken me.

I grieve for her dead baby.


"Chotii" wrote in message
news

"Jenny D" wrote in message
...
OMG... poor child... stupid woman.

You know, if her primary cesarean was anything like MINE (and mine wasn't
as
bad as some I've heard), maybe she simply never wanted to set foot in a
hospital again. I've been there, done that. Wound up with another cesarean
anyway. But come on, before you call this woman stupid, maybe consider
that
it's just possible she'd been so traumatised she'd rather risk losing her
next baby than go through that again. You know?

I pity her. I grieve with her.

--angela

"Jenny D" wrote
She killed her child; she's a murderer.


I really hope that some of our regular posters aren't reading this. If you
are, then (((((mega-hugs)))).

Jean

ChocolateTruffles wrote in message news:taiHc.49718$P7.7841@pd7tw3no...
Plissken wrote:

BTW, in what town did this happen?

In Sooke just outside of Victoria.

Somehow, that doesn't surprise me. :-( Poor baby.

Why isn't it surprising?

On a side note, my husband and I spent part of our honeymoon in Sooke,
at the Sooke Harbour House. Excellent food, beautiful accomodations.
The Galloping Goose Trail was pretty neat, too.

Cathy Weeks
Mommy to Kivi Alexis 12/01

On Thu, 08 Jul 2004 10:37:05 -0500, Donna Metler wrote:

Unless a woman has had previous pregnancy complications
or has pre-existing health issues, there's no reason to expect problems.

She had a C-sec with her first and knew the baby was breech. I cannot
blame the midwifes for not accepting her as a patient, I was just
wondering in howfar they explained to her *why* she was not accepted. Some
of them must have realized that she was quite fixed on this homebirth and
she could end up with unprofessional care.

It's a bizar catch 22: if only one of the midwifes would have accepted
her, her baby might have lived. But if not, she would most likely have
sued the midwife, indirectly sending insurance premiums rocketing and the
midwife out of business. Which the midwife probably realized and therefore
didn't accept her in the first place.

It is really deeply sad for the mother (and father), and I hope she
manages to live with her decision in the long run. I know, there is no
guarantee that the baby would have lived in hospital, but I'm sure the
chances would have been greatly improved.

--
-- I
mommy to DS (July '02)
mommy to three tiny angels (28 Oct'03, 17 Feb'04 & 20 May'04)
guardian of DH (33)

Well, wrong province...

Why doesn't it surprise you?

"ChocolateTruffles" wrote in
message news:taiHc.49718$P7.7841@pd7tw3no...
Plissken wrote:

BTW, in what town did this happen?

In Sooke just outside of Victoria.

Somehow, that doesn't surprise me. :-( Poor baby.

--
Brigitte aa #2145
http://ca.geocities.com/bironmonger/
Please excuse the quality. It is under construction and I am still
learning. :-)

"To repeat what others have said, requires education; to challenge it,
requires brains."
~ Mary Pettibone Poole

She killed her child; she's a murderer.

The only excuse she may possibly have is if she did so for some religious
reason.

I understand that you disagree, and that's ok, I am a very extreme person
(especially when pregnant) but I these types of things sicken me.

I grieve for her dead baby.


This is a terrible accusation, and the religious tidbit in now way
diminishes it: would murder for a god be less a murder?

I realize you are an extreme person who stands by her views, but this was
not a murder, it was an accident, which could also have happened in a
hospital.
That woman might have lacked some judgement, but the people around her did
too, and she is not to be blamed.

I sincerely hope nothing ever happens to you or your loved ones following a
decision you might have made thinking it was the right one.

You say you grieve for her dead baby... I grieve for her.

"Jenny D" wrote in message
news
I would never risk loosing my baby... no matted how traumatized I was. My
baby comes first before anything. If a doctor told me that I would have
to
give birth upside down while jabbing a fork in my eye so that my baby can
be
safe... I would do it.

She killed her child; she's a murderer.

The only excuse she may possibly have is if she did so for some religious
reason.

I understand that you disagree, and that's ok, I am a very extreme person
(especially when pregnant) but I these types of things sicken me.

I grieve for her dead baby.

The thing is-most people don't realize they CAN lose a baby until it happens
to them. I know I never even considered the possibility until I developed
HELLP at 22 weeks-and I know in my first pregnancy I was much more worried
about natural childbirth, birthing centers, etc. (There was always a pretty
high probability I'd need a C-section, so home birth wasn't an option).

Now, I'd do anything to have a baby to take home and hold-and it doesn't
matter how it gets here, and women worrying over where they have the baby
seems downright silly to me. But, when I read my journal from the first
pregnancy, I realize that it's no sillier than I was

There are SO many people out there advocating for VBAC, non-interventionist
childbirth, home birth, etc, that it would be easy to convince yourself that
the doctors are wrong if they tell you that they expect complications. After
all, having babies is easy, millions of women do it, right? And if that's
what you want, it's easy to convince yourself of that.

I pity her-because now not only will she have to deal with the guilt and
pain of a loss, but realize that there's a good chance that her choices
caused it. And that's a pain I would hate to see anyone go through.



"Chotii" wrote in message
news

"Jenny D" wrote in message
...
OMG... poor child... stupid woman.

You know, if her primary cesarean was anything like MINE (and mine
wasn't
as
bad as some I've heard), maybe she simply never wanted to set foot in a
hospital again. I've been there, done that. Wound up with another
cesarean
anyway. But come on, before you call this woman stupid, maybe consider
that
it's just possible she'd been so traumatised she'd rather risk losing
her
next baby than go through that again. You know?

I pity her. I grieve with her.

--angela

Zaz wrote:


I realize you are an extreme person who stands by her views, but this was
not a murder, it was an accident, which could also have happened in a
hospital.

Absolutely. Are we going to call women whose babies
die in hospital births due to medical malpractice, mistakes,
unnecessary interventions, etc. murderers as well? After all,
the vast majority of mistakes happen in hospitals. Anyone could
do the research and choose not to put herself in that position.
Wouldn't that make her just as culpable? We could keep taking
it further and further--should we ban pain relief drugs in
labor because in rare cases they can cause serious complications?

If you're going to play the blame game, at least
be consistent--at which point most people will realize
how foolish it is.

I agree the woman exercised poor judgement, but
unfortunately, that happens not infrequently in all sorts
of other cases that we call accidents, not murders.

Best wishes,
Ericka