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#61
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On Sat, 18 Sep 2004 17:53:40 -0600, "slykitten"
wrote: Right now, we're not too sure what the diagnosis on this kiddo is.... we had one therapist do an eval that said he had bipolar NOS and ADHD and we had other therapists (at the hospital) simply say that he has mood disorder.... no one can agree on anything.... One therapist said that it sounded like I needed to get a neurological consult to rule out possible seizure disorder! OY! But then.... that's not unreasonable and it's something I tried to do but my insurance won't cover it.... gotta love insurance companies! Ouch. That's nasty. I just can't imagine how hard the American healthcare system makes things for you guys. From my little bit of knowledge, I can tell you that bipolar is one of the mood disorders, so those two are just one broad and one more specific of the same kind of problem. And certainly kids, especially boys, who end up having mood disorders spend time with ADHD as a diagnosis fairly commonly first. That neurological consult sure sounds like a good idea. I wish I could help. Cele |
#62
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Subject: Need a couple of ideas and resources
From: oaway (Joelle) Date: 9/18/2004 9:45 PM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: I remember being told to give the baby up for adoption, and that I was wrong to be helping my daughter raise the baby? Why don't you go google the whole thread again. Maybe you'll be able to hear better what people were telling you. O.K. I find time hard to come by lately, I am better off dropping the defense and trying to listen harder........ not sure what you mean about Victim stories ? You are a victim. Nothing is your fault. You aren't responsbile for anything bad that's happened to you. Nothing anybody suggests will work because the whole world is against you. Anybody who doesn't tell you what you want to hear is abusing you. eeeekkkk !!!!!!! Not me ? seriously..... I do not want to be seen as a "Victim" I made huge mistakes that caused some of what we are going through. It has taken a lot of hard work for me to change. I have picked my battles with my daughter and indeed am responsible for some of this.I was listening, I did step back and look at this and saw that I needed to back off and when I left the kids to deal with thier child all hell broke lose. The responsibility became a fight between them and they are no longer together. I'm tired, I am worn out, emotionally spiritually and physically falling apart.What can I do when nothing I do helps anymore? Bev Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle |
#63
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Subject: Need a couple of ideas and resources
From: "slykitten" ms Date: 9/18/2004 7:59 PM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: I don't believe I was replying to Joelle because her advice was sound and I don't believe that she'd bash my beliefs religiously as marriage is a personal choice, etc.... however, I do believe it was a reply from that Bebelstrange person because this person has had a history of replying nastily to me in the past. That's ok though too. O.K. now I am confused ? Hello Slykitten, I would be "That Bebelestrnge person" you are reffering to here........My name is Bev. I kind of am wondering what you mean by saying I have a history of replying to you nastily in the past ? Would ya mind refreshing my memory because I think you are wrong about that????? I got involved in this thread because I felt Joelle was not respecting you when you called your Sig. other your sons Step Dad, I know I backed you here in this thread and I do not recall ever responding to you any other time. Bev I do hope I hadn't lashed at Joelle and please keep in mind that when I made some of my initial replies, I was only out of the hospital not more than a day or two and still feeling the effects of being really sick. I've had the chance to since read through and I'm amazed really that I'm not alone! |
#64
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"Bebelestrnge0721" wrote in message ... Subject: Need a couple of ideas and resources From: "CME" Date: 9/17/2004 6:28 PM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: 0yJ2d.20303$yW6.5300@clgrps12 "Karen O'Mara" wrote in message . com... oaway (Joelle) wrote in message ... I'll say some prayers for your grandchild tonight. God knows she needs them. well that's a prayer she could do without. Karen I see you see through her cloak and spot the dagger Thanks Karen Joelle can pray for anyone she likes and frankly, I don't see how a prayer for a small child is something that anyone can do without. While you're at it Joelle could you say one for me and my children? Having someone else think about us never hurts. Christine Christine, The point I am making or trying to make you seem to be missing. Joelle is not offering me sincere prayers for my grandchild. She is saying my granddaughter needs her prayers to save my grandchild from me, as if she is so great and powerful ugh..... She is being sarcastic with that remark ,as she has since I first posted here. She decided I was 1) a bad mother, 2) a bad grandmother, 3) an idiot, etc. and solely because she on her high pedestal, chooses to condemn me for the way I live, and the mistakes I made in the first year of my grieving the loss of my lifes partner to death. At that same time my youngest daughters mental illness was triggered also by her grief and loss. I held on to that kid despite my own short comings Some people are not as strong as others when grief is involved . we made it through all that and I am grateful I found that strength for my family. I do not and did not ask for the "poor you" support , I was honest to who I am and was slammed for the truth . I was slammed for our own beliefs about our family not seeing Adoption as an option for US . I AM HUMAN and have made mistakes , bad choices, and have paid that price in life. I have that forgiveness, and who the hell is she or anyone else to condemn me . we've crawled our way back through counsiling, therapy , and natural healing, as I know others have. I do not claim to be any more special than anyone else. Good therapists save lives and families and mine is a family that fell and stood back up and healed. I have not destroyed my children or my grandchildren, and her jabs at how she will pray for us is indeed a malicious and cruel attack. Follow as you feel you must. I got involved because I saw her do the same to Sly, it does not take a freekin rocket scientist to see through her . She is so obvious. Other than that I think she is capable of good advice and if she could control her personal feelings and judgements and accept that people have different lifestyles and that does not mean they are ****ing up thier kids because of that, then maybe she would stop having to pray for all of us sinners You misunderstand me, this is a love hate thing here for me, there is something about a person that uses spiritual goodness in an evil way that concerns me . Bev You still use alot of words for what I STILL see to be a "woe is me" syndrome. Christine |
#65
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"Cele" wrote in message ... On Fri, 17 Sep 2004 18:42:07 GMT, "CME" wrote: "Bebelestrnge0721" wrote in message ... ubject: Need a couple of ideas and resources From: "slykitten" ms Date: 9/16/2004 10:57 PM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: do you have any clue about anything??? he IS my son's STEP DAD!!!! he's the ONLY DAD my son has EVER known! He became DAD when my son was 15 months old and he accepted US. Yes, he IS STEP DAD. -- No Sly she does not have a clue... I do though , I understand 100%. My daughters had a step mom, from the time the oldest was 5 1/2 and the youngest she was 6 months old, would we have married over 20 years ago probably, but we were denied that right. What do I feel about the paperwork now F%$# it, means nothing what we had was more than any piece of paper could give us. Our vows were etched within our hearts . Stay strong let it roll off it doesn't matter if there are people so shallow that they don't get it. Take care Bev Are you on medication because I think you missed a dose. Oy. Lots of people are on medication. I'm on medication. Tell her to get stuffed if that's in your heart, but please don't use medication as an insult, k? No because I seriously think she's either not on the right meds. Perhaps this is her natural personality but I see her as an "over-reactive drama queen" with a major case of "I'm a victim" mixed with "the world is against me" syndrome (not a professional diagnosis mind you but hits the nail on the head regardless). I've been depressed on and off for a number of years and this woman has issues medication doesn't seem to be helping. Sure my comments may be harsh lately, but I really have no tolerance lately for drama. You see what you want to see, but I'm telling you, your judgement is clouded by your personal vendetta against Joelle. But then again, why am I wasting my breath when I'm supposed to be holding it. Good luck to you in life, I sincerely think you'll need it. Christine Lotta pain all 'round, I'd say. People lash out when they're hurting. At least, I do.... Hey Christine, did we get any further on the group meet this summer? Got any thoughts on the where of it? Paul and I seem to be up for it..... Cele Well considering I'm only a car ride away to Vancouver, I don't see an issue of not being able to make it with enough planning on my part. Christine |
#66
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On Sun, 19 Sep 2004 04:18:33 GMT, "CME"
wrote: Are you on medication because I think you missed a dose. Oy. Lots of people are on medication. I'm on medication. Tell her to get stuffed if that's in your heart, but please don't use medication as an insult, k? No because I seriously think she's either not on the right meds. Perhaps this is her natural personality but I see her as an "over-reactive drama queen" with a major case of "I'm a victim" mixed with "the world is against me" syndrome (not a professional diagnosis mind you but hits the nail on the head regardless). I've been depressed on and off for a number of years and this woman has issues medication doesn't seem to be helping. Sure my comments may be harsh lately, but I really have no tolerance lately for drama. Well, I'm not seeing what some others of you are seeing. I'm seeing someone who's been through a rough time, made some mistakes, stood by her kids and hurting some. But regardless of anyone's opinion of Bev, I get uncomfortable when people use the whole meds thing as a way to put someone down, because I see it as contributing to the whole societal censure and judgmental attitudes towards any kind of mental illness. Hey Christine, did we get any further on the group meet this summer? Got any thoughts on the where of it? Paul and I seem to be up for it..... Cele Well considering I'm only a car ride away to Vancouver, I don't see an issue of not being able to make it with enough planning on my part. Works for me! Now that school's back in I'm swamped all the time, but come summer, I'll have to come see you even if we don't get the group meet going. But a group meet would be even better. Cele |
#67
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Subject: Need a couple of ideas and resources
From: "CME" Date: 9/19/2004 12:18 AM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: tM73d.25351$yW6.7452@clgrps12 No because I seriously think she's either not on the right meds. Perhaps this is her natural personality but I see her as an "over-reactive drama queen" with a major case of "I'm a victim" mixed with "the world is against me" syndrome (not a professional diagnosis mind you but hits the nail on the head regardless). I've been depressed on and off for a number of years and this woman has issues medication doesn't seem to be helping. Sure my comments may be harsh lately, but I really have no tolerance lately for drama. Christine, Who knows ? I mean, I don't. I am under a lot of stress right now, I do not expect everyone to understand what this has been like for my family. I do not see our lifes issues being any worse than others, I know everyone has there own crosses to bear. I am reaching out , I am obviously going about it the wrong way for some to understand me. It does hurt when I have done the best that I can with all I have been handed ( by my own mistakes or not) I accept that , but I can't give in to it. I learn and I go on as many of us have. and sometimes it 'IS' O.K. to sing "You and me against the world" to your children, if you know what I mean. I hope that you do Bev |
#68
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"Bebelestrnge0721" wrote in message ... Subject: Need a couple of ideas and resources From: "CME" Date: 9/19/2004 12:18 AM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: tM73d.25351$yW6.7452@clgrps12 No because I seriously think she's either not on the right meds. Perhaps this is her natural personality but I see her as an "over-reactive drama queen" with a major case of "I'm a victim" mixed with "the world is against me" syndrome (not a professional diagnosis mind you but hits the nail on the head regardless). I've been depressed on and off for a number of years and this woman has issues medication doesn't seem to be helping. Sure my comments may be harsh lately, but I really have no tolerance lately for drama. Christine, Who knows ? I mean, I don't. I am under a lot of stress right now, I do not expect everyone to understand what this has been like for my family. I do not see our lifes issues being any worse than others, I know everyone has there own crosses to bear. I am reaching out , I am obviously going about it the wrong way for some to understand me. It does hurt when I have done the best that I can with all I have been handed ( by my own mistakes or not) I accept that , but I can't give in to it. I learn and I go on as many of us have. and sometimes it 'IS' O.K. to sing "You and me against the world" to your children, if you know what I mean. I hope that you do Bev Everyone has been under alot of stress at one or more point in their lives, what you don't seem to get is how you seem to thrive on the drama. I'm of the belief that the world isn't against us, it's our own choices that determine how that world unwraps. So instead of looking outside yourself and playing the victim, which you also seem to revel in, get over yourself and move on. Christine |
#69
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I'm tired, I am worn out, emotionally spiritually and physically falling
apart.What can I do when nothing I do helps anymore? Bev Then do nothing. If your daughter is determined to be a mother and the father is determined to NOT be a father...... there is nothing you can do. I suggested the adoption route BECAUSE of your daughter's mental illness, your other daughter's issues, and the chaos already around that you described..... Adoption may not have been the popular choice, but for an immature, mentally ill teen, it may have been the best choice. However, that's not likely to happen now I think sigh. I'm a firm believer in tough love..... it's necessary with some children (my own included). Doesn't mean they are abandoned and isolated, just means they assume responsibility for the decisions they make and the parents reject enabling. Just my 2 cents......... Christine |
#70
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On 19 Sep 2004 12:20:03 GMT, oaway (Joelle) wrote:
What can I do when nothing I do helps anymore? Keep going. So true..... Cele |
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