C-section to Vaginal Ratio recommendations?

If he has a 5 percent or less rater of c-sections, I'd
drop on the floor and kiss his feet. I think the odds you'll
find that are slim and none. The national average is about
26 percent now, so anything lower than that would be better
than average. Good homebirth midwives probably weigh in
around 5 percent or less, so that would be absolutely
outstanding. If he were truly non-interventionist, he
could have a 10 percent c-section rate.

Homebirth midwifes do have the advantage that elective c-sections are not
going to be in their statistics, plus their patients are usually very
committed to natural birth. A direct comparison is difficult.

I find it quite scary that even with a good homebirth midwife the rate is
still 5%, but then I am overly freaked out by c-sections.

Anne

wrote:

Good call, I should. I added that to my list.

I'll bet they hate it when we show up with lists...


I *always* bring lists (for my OB appts, GP appts,
DS's ped appts), and I always get a positive reaction
from the caregivers. I think they feel like my being
organized ahead of time means that a) they're answering
all of my questions and b) we get through it more quickly,
since I don't spend time trying to remember what it was
I wanted to ask. I also get positive reactions from
caregivers about my doing my own research. They want me
to be an informed partner in my own care, and frankly,
I wouldn't want to be seen by a doc who felt otherwise.

The perinatologist with Scheherazade even complemented us
on the questions we asked!

Emily

Emily wrote:
wrote:

I *always* bring lists (for my OB appts, GP appts,
DS's ped appts), and I always get a positive reaction
from the caregivers.

I feel bad asking a lot of questions because I just hate waiting at the
doctor's office (although I've been pleasantly surprised that this
doctor hasn't kept us waiting much). I always feel like I'm keeping
someone else waiting if I ask a lot of questions. It makes it
difficult, because there's so much that I want to know about my OB. I
never found it necessary to get to know my GP, because he was basically
a human vending machine for antibiotics for years and years (I've been
blessed with extremely good health for most of my life, and have never
had to get to know a doctor).

I probably need to get over this. The OB is very accommodating and
willing to answer questions. I always feel, though, like I need to
rush through them in order to let the next patient have her turn. The
next patient is probably in there for three hours...

Amy

Melania wrote:

Hah! Our doctor group was a fun bunch; one of the doctors said
"basically we're really lazy and don't do any work. We just hang out,
act encouraging, and after we make sure the cord isn't wrapped around
the neck, we even get Dad to catch the baby." I leaned over to dh and
said "do you *want* to catch the baby?" "uh, no!" "oh, GOOD. Let's
just
let the people who've done that a few hundred times handle it, then."
He was busy helping me, anyway.

After my husband mentioned that he wanted to catch the baby, before we
found out that the OB won't let him, we got into a big hairy discussion
about who was going to be helping me while he was down there playing
doctor. I said, "If you're catching, I want my sister there to hold my
hand and help me count." He insisted that he could do both. He just
couldn't understand why it wouldn't be every bit as good if he were
between my feet, and I couldn't make him understand that I wanted his
attention on ME, not the baby, for 10 more seconds before it's on the
baby for the rest of our lives. I would imagine that if he did catch,
it would take concentration, and he certainly wouldn't be able to focus
on me and catching the baby...

I was really relieved when the doctor said he wouldn't let him catch,
because my husband was unwilling to let anyone else in the room. I
even suggested hiring a doula, so that someone would be able to support
me, and he wouldn't hear of it. *sigh*

Amy

Anne Rogers wrote:

He's also not going to let my husband catch the baby, due to
liability,
which is also a relief. I'd rather have him holding my hand at
that
point, anyway. The last thing I want to have to worry about is
Daddy
vs. Slippery Baby.

would he let you catch the baby? this wasn't something I asked for,
but when
the time came the midwife did what she needed to do on the
penultimate
contraction, which was unloop the cord from the baby's neck and then
told me
to lift it on to me tummy on the next contraction, which I did and it
was a
fantastic moment, my husband was up my my head so he was close too,
it was a
wonderful moment,

I didn't think to ask, but it sure doesn't sound like it. I don't
think I'd want to, anyway. Mommy vs. Slippery Baby doesn't sound any
better than Daddy vs. Slippery Baby (although I'm glad that it worked
well for you!!). I'm clumsy, and I'm not very bendy. I can't figure
out how I would do it without hurting myself or dropping the baby...

I need to see video of this happening. I also need to see video of
various birthing positions (so that I can show my husband that
squatting isn't weird). Is there such a thing online? You all would
know, if there is...

Amy

Elle wrote:
Hmm I don't know anything about standing orders. Can you explain a
bit?

wrote:

Standing orders are what the doctor wants the hospital to do with all
of their patients between the time the patient checks in, and when
the
doctor shows up. If a doctor wants every woman shaved, enemaed (is
that a word?), given an IV, and to have no food or fluids, that would
be a part of his standing orders. Trouble is that these things
happen
when the doctor is still on the golf course, or in bed, so there's no
one there to argue with. The nurses will get in trouble if they
don't
do it, and you can be labelled a "problem patient" if you fight them
on
it... (according to my mom, anyway).
snipped

Oh OK. I think things are done a bit differently here -- all the things
you mention, when it comes to maternity care, are governed by hospital
policy, not the individual whim of the doctor. Well they don't shave or
enema anymore, but things like IV, food & drink etc are governed by the
general standard of care on the unit. L & D has a handbook outlining
all their practices so you know what you are getting into. I can't
think of anything my doctor would issue a standing order for.
Interesting.

That's why I checked out the hospital really thoroughly, and also met
with a couple L & D nurses for an info session -- they are really the
ones in charge. If all goes according to plan the doctor just shows up
to check on you a couple of times and catch the baby!

Elle
2/16/2005

wrote in message
oups.com...
I said, "If you're catching, I want my sister there to hold my
hand and help me count."

Just for the record, there's no need to "count" while pushing if you're not
anesthetized. That whole counting-to-ten thing while pushing originates
because women who've had epidurals often can't feel the urge to push and
have to be "coached" to push through contractions. If did that to me when I
could actually *feel* the urge to push, I'd knock their blocks off!

He insisted that he could do both. He just
couldn't understand why it wouldn't be every bit as good if he were
between my feet, and I couldn't make him understand that I wanted his
attention on ME, not the baby, for 10 more seconds before it's on the
baby for the rest of our lives. I would imagine that if he did catch,
it would take concentration, and he certainly wouldn't be able to focus
on me and catching the baby...

Of course, that's perfectly reasonable (wanting his attention on you rather
than the baby), but you might be surprised by how you actually feel when
that moment comes. Don't be too surprised if you find him wanting to focus
on the baby because *you're* focussed on the baby (or getting it out, anyway
g).

I was really relieved when the doctor said he wouldn't let him catch,
because my husband was unwilling to let anyone else in the room. I
even suggested hiring a doula, so that someone would be able to support
me, and he wouldn't hear of it. *sigh*

Try to talk him into a doula, anyway, especially if you have any hopes of
having an unmedicated birth. A doula has seen labor *waaaaay* more times
than either you or your husband have and is going to have far more tricks up
her sleeve for helping you cope with labor than either of you could come up
with on your own or together. In addition, because your husband is your
husband, he is probably more susceptible to suggestions from medical staff
that this or that (unnecessary, annoying) procedure is really only for your
good and/or the baby's good (when it may well just be what the hospital
staff are *used* to doing and therefore it makes their jobs easier). A good
doula who understands your preferences and knows what type of birth you're
aiming for is better able of separating the wheat from the chaff in these
sorts of situations and of acting as your advocate without the conflict of
such close emotional ties.

I never had a doula for any of my births, but I greatly regret that I didn't
for my first. I strongly suspect I would have had a much more positive birth
experience if I'd had someone knowledgeable and experienced there to help me
and advocate for me. By the time I got to my second and third births, I knew
what I wanted well enough to be my own advocate (and my husband knew how
*my* labors went well enough to support me in what I wanted), but the first
time, we were both too green for it to work out very well.
--
Be well, Barbara
Mom to Mr. Congeniality (7), the Diva (5) and the Race Car Fanatic (almost
3)

Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to see, so much to do,
So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
You'll never know if you don't go.
You'll never shine if you don't glow.
- "All Star", Smashmouth

Circe wrote:
wrote in message
oups.com...
I said, "If you're catching, I want my sister there to hold my
hand and help me count."

Just for the record, there's no need to "count" while pushing if
you're not
anesthetized. That whole counting-to-ten thing while pushing
originates
because women who've had epidurals often can't feel the urge to push
and
have to be "coached" to push through contractions. If did that to me
when I
could actually *feel* the urge to push, I'd knock their blocks off!

Hahaha! It's frightening, how many of the ideas I have for what this
is going to be like come from TV and movies. *sigh* Being a first
timer is kind of hard.

Of course, that's perfectly reasonable (wanting his attention on you
rather
than the baby), but you might be surprised by how you actually feel
when
that moment comes. Don't be too surprised if you find him wanting to
focus
on the baby because *you're* focussed on the baby (or getting it out,
anyway
g).

I'm glad you think it's reasonable. I felt like a shrew typing it. I
just want *SOMEONE* paying attention to me! If I pass out or have a
stroke or something, I want someone to notice right away, not 10
minutes later when they finally wonder why I'm not cooing at the baby.


Try to talk him into a doula, anyway, especially if you have any
hopes of
having an unmedicated birth. A doula has seen labor *waaaaay* more
times
than either you or your husband have and is going to have far more
tricks up
her sleeve for helping you cope with labor than either of you could
come up
with on your own or together. In addition, because your husband is
your
husband, he is probably more susceptible to suggestions from medical
staff
that this or that (unnecessary, annoying) procedure is really only
for your
good and/or the baby's good (when it may well just be what the
hospital
staff are *used* to doing and therefore it makes their jobs easier).

I suggested that to him, once, that he might listen to the doctors
because I'm in pain and he doesn't want me to be in pain... He got
really offended. But I know it's a natural tendency for men. I really
need to work on this doula thing...

A good
doula who understands your preferences and knows what type of birth
you're
aiming for is better able of separating the wheat from the chaff in
these
sorts of situations and of acting as your advocate without the
conflict of
such close emotional ties.

That sounds so nice... I need one.

I never had a doula for any of my births, but I greatly regret that I
didn't
for my first. I strongly suspect I would have had a much more
positive birth
experience if I'd had someone knowledgeable and experienced there to
help me
and advocate for me. By the time I got to my second and third births,
I knew
what I wanted well enough to be my own advocate (and my husband knew
how
*my* labors went well enough to support me in what I wanted), but the
first
time, we were both too green for it to work out very well.

I will definitely try to talk to him about this, but it seems like he
gets insulted whenever I suggest that his support might not be
enough... He doesn't understand that a doula would be there to support
*him* too. Men!!

Thanks for the really great advice,
Amy

After my husband mentioned that he wanted to catch the baby, before we
found out that the OB won't let him, we got into a big hairy discussion
about who was going to be helping me while he was down there playing
doctor. I said, "If you're catching, I want my sister there to hold my
hand and help me count." He insisted that he could do both. He just
couldn't understand why it wouldn't be every bit as good if he were
between my feet, and I couldn't make him understand that I wanted his
attention on ME, not the baby, for 10 more seconds before it's on the
baby for the rest of our lives. I would imagine that if he did catch,
it would take concentration, and he certainly wouldn't be able to focus
on me and catching the baby...

Honestly, it could be totally different for you. When I was pushing the
first time, I didn't need my DH holding my hand. He was paying attention to
me, absolutely, but mostly he was holding the mirror for me and encouraging
me verbally. I don't want it to sound like I didn't need him, because I
did, but he was doing exactly what I needed him to do. If I had needed him
to hold my hand or whatever, he would have done that, but as it happened, I
needed his physical touch more during labor than during the pushing part.
He would have been able to catch the baby without it taking any attention
from me at all. As it happened, once the baby's head and shoulders were
out, he put down the mirror, and the two of us together put our hands around
the baby's chest and brought her the rest of the way out and onto my chest.
This time we're intending for him to catch the baby, including the head
(with the midwife providing guidance and perineal protection), if he wants
to at the time, if I don't need him to be holding my hand or otherwise
physically supporting me, and if the baby and I are in a good position for
him to catch. We're not stuck on it, though, so if it doesn't turn out to
be the best thing, that's okay too. All that to say that you may be
surprised at what you do or don't need/want your DH to do. IMO, it's most
important to be flexible and for your DH to be willing to do or not do
whatever it is you do or don't need/want.


--
-Sara
Mommy to DD, 3 Very Soon
And Someone Now Overdue

wrote:

I suggested that to him, once, that he might listen to the doctors
because I'm in pain and he doesn't want me to be in pain... He got
really offended. But I know it's a natural tendency for men. I really
need to work on this doula thing...

We didn't have a doula for our first baby and really regret it.
We were both very suggestable/vulnerable and both have lots
of regrets about DD1's birth (ended up in a c-section).



A good
doula who understands your preferences and knows what type of birth
you're aiming for is better able of separating the wheat from the chaff in
these sorts of situations and of acting as your advocate without the
conflict of such close emotional ties.


That sounds so nice... I need one.


I never had a doula for any of my births, but I greatly regret that I
didn't for my first. I strongly suspect I would have had a much more
positive birthexperience if I'd had someone knowledgeable and experienced there to
help me and advocate for me. By the time I got to my second and third births,
I knew what I wanted well enough to be my own advocate (and my husband knew
how *my* labors went well enough to support me in what I wanted), but the
first time, we were both too green for it to work out very well.


I will definitely try to talk to him about this, but it seems like he
gets insulted whenever I suggest that his support might not be
enough... He doesn't understand that a doula would be there to support
*him* too. Men!!


DH was supportive of getting a doula for our second daughter
(unmedicated VBAC), but actually having a face to face meeting
with the doula I chose sealed the deal. We came out of our
first together meeting with her and he was thrilled that she
would be there to share the load. And as she told him, she wasn't
there just to support me, but to support him supporting me. She
assured him that she wouldn't take his place, but would provide
a buffer for us. And she was priceless. If we were ever to have
another baby (which we aren't), we'd hire a doula again in a
second. She was instrumental in me succeeding with a VBAC.

And during the birth of DD2 our doula was priceless. DH's support
was incredible (our midwife said he was the best support person
she'd ever seen . And our doula enabled him to be that support
person. During labor she made suggestions, ths freed DH to implement
the suggestions instead of trying to think of what might help.
Additionally, I had a really long pushing stage. She was able to
speak with the midwife and the nurse and assure us that the baby
was doing just fine, so DH could stay completely with me while
she was off gathering information. That really helped. She knew
what questions to ask so she could give us a status update without
either of us thinking about the types of questions to ask.

So my suggestion is to find a doula you like, and then drag your DH to
meet her. You don't have to commit to hiring her, but talking
with her may just change his mind.

Good luck!

Mary W.