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Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?



 
 
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  #21  
Old September 22nd 06, 01:28 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
beeswing
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Posts: 16
Default Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?

Kevin Karplus wrote:
On 2006-09-17, Dawn wrote:
Come to think of it, why not think of it that way? Wouldn't you
*prefer* she still wanted to trick-or-treat as opposed to the other
things teens do on Halloween?


In Santa Cruz, CA, Halloween is probably the biggest party night of
the year, with 25,000 people crowding into a few blocks downtown (the
city population is about 55,000 and the county about 250,000). Last
year the party got out of hand with 7 gang-related stabbings, with all
6 of the county's ambulances in use, plus the 2 LifeFlight
helicopters.

I'd much rather see the teens asking for handouts of candy, costumes
or not.


Well, with a comparative like that, of course.

But it's really not that big of a deal where I live. Halloween has
practically died due to lack of interest.

beeswing

  #22  
Old September 22nd 06, 01:29 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
Karen
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Posts: 2
Default Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?

She argues that at 11, she's
still a child and should be allowed to trick-or-treat. But she doesn't
stop there...she tries to tell me that she'll be a child until she's
18. (She should have stopped while she was ahead!)



Be glad that she still recognises that she is a child; my 13 year old
step-daughter insists that she is an adult not a child.

If we did trick or treating (we don't), I'd be inclined to let her go
but limit her to friend's houses; if she looks older and is dressed in a
scary way (I assume she will be!) she might well appear intimidating to
some people, especially small children.

Karen

  #23  
Old September 22nd 06, 01:29 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
beeswing
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Posts: 16
Default Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?

Chris wrote:

My older son who turned 15 yesterday didn't go last year, but I think
he did the year before, when he was 13--partly because he went with his
9 year old brother. Evan, who will turn 11 just before Halloween and is
in 6th grade will probably want to go this year, but I imagine it will
be his last. We live in a rural area and they usually only go to 5-8
houses on our road. Everyone only gets a dozen or so trick or
treaters, so they give out handfuls of candy. He probably gets as much
from those houses as if he went to 20-30 and got one piece at every
stop. Halloween is my least favorite holiday of all and we are pretty
low-key about it, so I don't expect either boy to really persist in
trick or treating very much longer.

Chris


Thanks for the data point. It's great that your trick-or-treating is so
low key. Here in the city it's a wee bit different...the kids (my kid
included) are primarily out for megaloads of candy.

beeswing

  #24  
Old September 22nd 06, 01:30 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
beeswing
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Posts: 16
Default Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?

Barbara wrote:

We don't *do* Halloween, but we did when I was a kid, so I feel I'm
still qualified to respond. ;-

IMHO, I can't see the harm in allowing her to trick-or-treat if she
wants to. Twelve is such an in-between age; some kids are
12-going-on-9, and others are 12-going-on-24 (and some go back and
forth between the extremes several times a day). She'll be rolling her
eyes at *kid stuff* far too soon; let her enjoy it as long as she
wants.

Barbara


Thanks; this is good advice. I've come to (almost) the same conclusion.
Well, I don't know about "as long as she wants"...but 12 is in-between,
and I've OK'd her for trick-or-treating this year, at least. Next year
we can revisit it. She's already saying that she probably wouldn't be
going next year.

beeswing

  #26  
Old September 22nd 06, 01:33 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
beeswing
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Posts: 16
Default Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?

Dawn wrote:
beeswing wrote:
My daughter will be 12 in December and is in 6th grade

(snip)
What do parents here think? How old is too old to trick-or-treat?


I think it's too old when the kid doesn't want to go anymore.


I'm not sure I'm willing to take it quite that far. I mean, I think
it's a good marker, but not the only marker. I still believe that teens
don't need to be trick-or-treating...that it's mostly for the younger
set. But my daughter isn't a teen yet, and I wouldn't have even
considered cutting off trick-or-treating this year if she wasn't
already in her second year of middle school. (I know. Arbitrary.)

For
Henry, that was 12 -- but I wouldn't fight him if he still wanted to go
(or if he wanted to go with friends this year). I suspect he stopped
because he got tall early and felt uncomfortable -- he turns 14 today
and is 6'3"


What a tall boy! My daughter is tall for a girl age, but that's still
"only" a little over 5 ft 4 in. She looks at least 14, though, and
maybe even older if you look fast.

I'd require him to dress up -- I can't handle the 16 year olds in jeans
and a t-shirt with a Wal-mart plastic sack... but I do still give them
candy on the theory that there is a lot worse those kids could be doing
on Halloween night.


We don't get trick-or-treaters down our street...it's a dead end. So
I'm out of the loop as far as what other kids do.

Come to think of it, why not think of it that way? Wouldn't you
*prefer* she still wanted to trick-or-treat as opposed to the other
things teens do on Halloween?


Probably. On the other hand, she's shown no interest in the "other
things teens do on Halloween" so it's not (yet) an issue.

FWIW, in our part of the country, which is just a few miles north of
the border with Mexico, the Halloween season is a multi-generational
celebration and we actually get a fair number of adults at our door
each year (in great costumes). The Mexican "Day Of The Dead" (Dia de
los Muerta) celebrations are pretty cool. But then, I *love* Halloween
and decorate almost as much for it as I do for Christmas.


That is kinda kewl. Can see how that would happen near Mexico.

-Dawn
Mom to Henry, 14 today!!!!


Happy belated birthday to Henry! My, do the years fly....

beeswing

  #27  
Old September 23rd 06, 12:47 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
Paula
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Posts: 14
Default Trick-or-treating -- how old is too old?

On Thu, 21 Sep 2006 15:30:26 EDT, "beeswing" wrote:

I told her that I considered her viewpoint and asked the question in a
newsgroup I respected...and that I was willing to change my mind.

I hope what she learns from this is that I *will* listen to her and her
reasons (but not necessarily in every case agree with her) and that I'm
open to taking advice and suggestions from people whose viewpoints I
respect...and finally, that I'm open to changing my mind if the
evidence weighs that way.

I think those are good lessons for a kid to have no matter what his or
her age.


Absolutely! It's the kids who are afraid to even bring up a subject
with their parents who sneak out and get into the most trouble. If
she knows she can talk to you about it and you will listen to her and
take her viewpoint into consideration, it will mean a lot to her and
to your relationship with her. Kids care a lot about being heard and
really understood and respect you for it even when they don't always
get their way.

Well done to both you and your daughter! And Happy Halloween!

--
Paula
"Anyway, other people are weird, but sometimes they have candy,
so it's best to try to get along with them." Joe Bay

 




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