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In the best interest of the children

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Old June 1st 08, 03:48 PM posted to alt.child-support
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Default In the best interest of the children

I married my first love. She seemed to be a wonderful person but I found
out that she would tell you whatever she wanted you to believe, and the
truth didn't matter to her. She was the only girl I had been with sexually
until after she divorced me.

After we were married about a year, I was sent out of town for training and
she committed adultery. After I found out, she claimed to be sorry and
wanted to be forgiven. I was reluctant to trust her because she's lied
before, I think she was sorry that she got caught. I was told that God's
will was for me to forgive her. After this I was tempted to "get even" a
few times but I didn't do it, my dad was an adulterer and it really hurt mom
and us kids, I hated adultery. We seemed to have a pretty happy marriage
and had children.

After the 2nd child, she started sliding back to her old ways. I found out
that she had been telling people that she cheated on me because I cheated on
her. I didn't but in hindsight I wish I did, I wouldn't deny it if I did.
After she moved out, but before the divorce, she was pregnant with the 3rd
child. She claimed she wanted to divorce me because we fought too much and
it was "for the best interest of the children". What we fought about was
her wanting a divorce.

Anyway, she divorced me, I noticed in the whole divorce / child support
process it seems assumed that the man is automatically guilty even if proven
innocent. I was paying child support on the 3 girls and the ex decides
she's to sick and can't handle the kids so they lived with me for a while.
The department of public aid got on me because I wasn't paying my child
support. I told them that the kids were living with me and I didn't think I
needed to send child support. She was living on public aid for her and the
kids and going out with her boyfriend and partying like she had no
responsibilities. So I paid child support for the time the kids lived with
me, and public aid never held her accountable for what she had done. Also,
I think it's highly likely that the 3rd daughter isn't mine, but I love her
for who she is, not for who her dad is.

She later married this boyfriend that she left me for (after cheating on him
multiple times). She left and divorced him after he raped one of our
daughters. Remember, all this is in the best interest of the kids, good ole
mom. In the mean time I got a better paying job and the CS she got more
than tripled from what it was originally, which is when she bought herself a
sport car but the kids had to work to buy their own car and auto insurance.

I ended up with a much better wife and have been married over 10 years now
and have a good stable home life. My ex lives with a guy her 2nd husband
worked with, and she sluts around with others when they aren't getting
along. One of the girls is 18 and just finished HS this year, another will
be 18 in October. They are figuring out that their mom is spending their CS
money on herself. The kids will be leaving the nest and the old hen will
only have whatever whoremonger(s) she can find.

Unfortunately the daughters are starting to live their life the way they
been raised. It's hard to remember that it's all in the best interest of
the children.

I just wanted to tell a bit of my story because I'm an exception in many of
the instances that are brought up. If I'm paying CS for a daughter that
isn't mine, it's because she slept around, not me. I guess getting raped,
seeing mom shack with one man after another, seeing mom spend your CS on
herself, and having to work till midnight and go to school the next day is
all in the best interest of the child!



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