Inappropriate Teacher's Dress

"Barbara" wrote in message
ups.com...
SNIP
Just kidding. I think we have given a good go at this. I think neither
of
us is ever going to come to the other's way of thinking. You are still
invited to a ficticious invitation to my house. Will you come if Joe is
wearing his International Male shorts?
SNIP

Gotta do it. What on earth are International Male shorts? I took a
brief look at their website. Their clothes, ummm, didn't appeal to my
sense of style. But I didn't see them as a specific genre. Are they
the male equivalent of Daisy Dukes?

Some of the stuff in their catalog is WAY Daisy Duke. I have never looked at
their website though.


Barbara

"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...

"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...
Picuture us sitting having a chat at a coffee shop. Who is the
communicator?

Whoever is speaking at the moment? If two people are together, then
both are communicating something by what they wear.

Bizby


My point was that communication is made up of a speaker and a listener,
and sender and a receiver.

The thing is that I don't really think there is as much of a disconnect
as you guys all think. I think we all agree that we should try to
dress appropriately for the occasion, even if we may not agree
exactly on what "appropriately" might mean for any different
occasion. I think we also all agree that should try to be tolerant
of the clothing choices of others.

So why all the pages and pages of postings?

Bizby


I think there is a greater disconnect between Banty and I vs Ericka and I.
Bad clothing choices = jerk as near as I read her recent post up a tad.
Different strokes, I guess.

Stephanie wrote:
"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...

Stephanie wrote:

I think we have given a good go at this. I think neither of us is ever
going to come to the other's way of thinking. You are still invited to a
ficticious invitation to my house. Will you come if Joe is wearing his
International Male shorts?

Sure...I just probably won't invite him to my next
black tie party ;-)

That sounds fair.

Well, and probably not too much skin off anyone's nose,
since my next black tie party might well be my 2yo daughter's
wedding, if then ;-)

Best wishes,
Ericka

On 28 Jun 2005 10:05:30 -0700, Banty wrote:


I'm not sure what "International Male" shorts are, but assuming it's something
beyond the pale, it would go something like this.

1. Yes I would go because you wouldn't be informing me of this - right?

I think that she said earlier she would not because it simply isnt
something that she would think about. This is a freind who happens to
dress this way. Perhaps she has another friend who always wears
khakis and polo shirts.
2. If this is truly an awful thing to wear, I'd consider the guy a jerk and
avoid him or just be civil,

I think you just made her point. YOu assume someone is a jerk because
he dresses like in (fill int he blank), without ever speaking to him.
And from my experience, more limiting than I personally want to be
(speaking for me, not stephanie)

Barb

In article , Stephanie says...


"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , Stephanie says...


"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Stephanie wrote:


People send and receive messages all the time, based on all sorts of
things. Banty, you are certainly right when you say that is the way it
is. To me, this means all of us have a responsibilty when sending *and
receiving*

This I agree with.

and that no special onus exists on the sender.

This I do not agree with. Sending is the more active role,

You're wrong.

Just kidding. I think we have given a good go at this. I think neither
of
us is ever going to come to the other's way of thinking. You are still
invited to a ficticious invitation to my house. Will you come if Joe is
wearing his International Male shorts?

I'm not sure what "International Male" shorts are, but assuming it's
something
beyond the pale, it would go something like this.

1. Yes I would go because you wouldn't be informing me of this - right?


I just did! But if we were not already having this conversation, it would
never dawn on me to bring it up. It does not hit my radar. No offense would
be intended.

2. If this is truly an awful thing to wear, I'd consider the guy a jerk

That's too bad. He's a great guy.


and
avoid him or just be civil, and if it's acting jerky in other ways as well
and I
can't avoid him I'd leave - UNLESS - -
3. - - he seems to display some very obvious redeeming qualities (very
funny
and/or very interesting somehow) in which case I woudl re-categorize him
as "a
character".

Now you're proposing one jerk/character.


No I'm not. I'm proposing a guy who thinks having his butt cheeks hang out
looks good. You are the one who classified him as a jerk. (Which is the very
crux of my issue, I think.)

With one or two jerks, I'd attend
another party of yours, as long as the problems were easy to deal with.
If I
found that the whole *tenor* of your party was dominated by the fact that
quite
a few people did whatever, however, double-dipping in the food and trying
to get
me to buy stuff or asking me my salary or something, I'd feel
uncomfortable, and
I'd make some excuse to leave as soon as it was at all graceful, and not
accept
any of your subsquent invitations.

If your parties are full of characters, well, depends on particulars, but
it's
pretty easy to get "character-overload". Just for starters, *I'm* at that
party... :-)


He's not much of a character. He just has an exposed butt.

No offsetting redeeming qualities? Oh well.

Banty

In article , Stephanie says...


"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...

"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...
Picuture us sitting having a chat at a coffee shop. Who is the
communicator?

Whoever is speaking at the moment? If two people are together, then
both are communicating something by what they wear.

Bizby


My point was that communication is made up of a speaker and a listener,
and sender and a receiver.

The thing is that I don't really think there is as much of a disconnect
as you guys all think. I think we all agree that we should try to
dress appropriately for the occasion, even if we may not agree
exactly on what "appropriately" might mean for any different
occasion. I think we also all agree that should try to be tolerant
of the clothing choices of others.

So why all the pages and pages of postings?

Bizby


I think there is a greater disconnect between Banty and I vs Ericka and I.
Bad clothing choices = jerk as near as I read her recent post up a tad.
Different strokes, I guess.




Now wait. From the description (and I did stipulate something quite beyond the
pale), this isn't a "bad clothing choice". It's in-your-face I-don't-givva****
peek-at-privates.

So, when would YOU think someone is making your other guests uncomfortable?
Some butt showing? All the butt a'la Prince at the award show? Naked waist
down? At just exactly what line on that butt would you decide that folks
uncomfortable with it aren't just being judgemental so-and-so's and the guy is
(ahem, avoiding the 'j-word') being somewhat insensitive and inconsiderate??

Over to you...

Banty

"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , Stephanie says...


"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...

"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...
Picuture us sitting having a chat at a coffee shop. Who is the
communicator?

Whoever is speaking at the moment? If two people are together, then
both are communicating something by what they wear.

Bizby


My point was that communication is made up of a speaker and a listener,
and sender and a receiver.

The thing is that I don't really think there is as much of a disconnect
as you guys all think. I think we all agree that we should try to
dress appropriately for the occasion, even if we may not agree
exactly on what "appropriately" might mean for any different
occasion. I think we also all agree that should try to be tolerant
of the clothing choices of others.

So why all the pages and pages of postings?

Bizby


I think there is a greater disconnect between Banty and I vs Ericka and I.
Bad clothing choices = jerk as near as I read her recent post up a tad.
Different strokes, I guess.




Now wait. From the description (and I did stipulate something quite
beyond the
pale), this isn't a "bad clothing choice". It's in-your-face
I-don't-givva****
peek-at-privates.


So obviously you have a difference of opinion about what constitutes
appropriate. Could you please stop making my points for me?

So, when would YOU think someone is making your other guests
uncomfortable?
Some butt showing? All the butt a'la Prince at the award show? Naked
waist
down? At just exactly what line on that butt would you decide that folks
uncomfortable with it aren't just being judgemental so-and-so's and the
guy is
(ahem, avoiding the 'j-word') being somewhat insensitive and
inconsiderate??


I don't know. I have never ever been a judgmental so and so about any
article of clothing, so I could not say.

Over to you...

Banty

Stephanie wrote:

"Banty" wrote in message
...

Now wait. From the description (and I did stipulate something quite
beyond the
pale), this isn't a "bad clothing choice". It's in-your-face
I-don't-givva****
peek-at-privates.

So obviously you have a difference of opinion about what constitutes
appropriate. Could you please stop making my points for me?

Actually, I think what you may have is more a different
picture in mind of the specific article of clothing under
discussion.

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Stephanie wrote:

"Banty" wrote in message
...

Now wait. From the description (and I did stipulate something quite
beyond the
pale), this isn't a "bad clothing choice". It's in-your-face
I-don't-givva****
peek-at-privates.

So obviously you have a difference of opinion about what constitutes
appropriate. Could you please stop making my points for me?

Actually, I think what you may have is more a different
picture in mind of the specific article of clothing under
discussion.

Best wishes,
Ericka


I don't think the article of clothing actually matters that much. I think
Banty and I are on the opposite ends of the universe on this one.

"Stephanie" wrote in message
...
I think there is a greater disconnect between Banty and I vs Ericka and I.
Bad clothing choices = jerk as near as I read her recent post up a tad.
Different strokes, I guess.

She said, "truly awful". I can see some clothing choices as making me think
someone was a jerk. T-shirts with racist, anti-Semitic, or homophobic
slogans or pictures for example would make me think that. So, are we going
to spend another 100 posts trying to define exactly where the line of "truly
awful" resides? For me personally, overly tight or revealing clothing
wouldn't make me think "jerk" necessarily, but might not leave a favorable
impression.

Bizby