Kids interest

Can anyone relate to me with not knowing what your kids are interested
in?
I put one in karate and he seems to like it but the other two I have no
clue. They are just kids but I can't get them to stick to one thing.

Yes, all you can really do is present them with a list of activities
you can sign them up for. I did this this summer with my two, six and
eight, and they picked what they wanted, although one wanted to enter
into a lego building class, which I refused to spend money on at this
point. Anyway, I narrowed it down and chose a san chu ryu (sp) class,
as it was what I wanted because it taught them a bit of self defense
pertaining to strangers. lol. My eight-year-old cried when I told him
this and I almost erased it, but when I explained it wasn't really
karate and listed details instead, he decided he would give it a try.
lol. He loves it. Anyway, we have tried baseball in the past, but
because my son picked it, he finished each of the two seasons we paid
for. It turns out he really could only say that he liked the pool
parties, the parades, friends, and the trophies, so we did not spend
that money there again. He wanted to try soccer so I hesitantly forked
over the $90+ dollars for that, and thank goodness he loves it so far.
There are community-sponsored short-term activities every summer in my
area that are far less expensive for the kids and I've stuck with those
until they find something that clicks. Paying the big bucks for all of
the activities that are for the kids who know what they want was
getting expensive and frustrating, especially only to learn they did
not like it. lol. My daughter is currently trying T-ball, but in a $45,
six-week league rather than the $90, 12-week league. lol. She seems to
love the socialization, but I can't tell whether or not she loves it.
lol. Had my son cried about going to T-ball, I would not have forced
him into going, as a child making a decision at the ages of 6 to 8
should not hold the "you must finish what you started" repercussion -
they just don't know the end result and I certainly will never punish
them for trying something new. Now, if my son were 14 and he had me
spend big bucks on an activity at his request and then he decided he
wanted to quit, I would probably see to it that he learned the "finish
what you start" philosophy.


wrote:
Can anyone relate to me with not knowing what your kids are interested
in?
I put one in karate and he seems to like it but the other two I have no
clue. They are just kids but I can't get them to stick to one thing.

wrote in message
ups.com...
Can anyone relate to me with not knowing what your kids are interested
in?
I put one in karate and he seems to like it but the other two I have no
clue. They are just kids but I can't get them to stick to one thing.

Yes!! Activity wise we just try different things. We haven't tried much
yet. The 7yo has tried soccer and baseball for sports. He wasn't overly
excited about it and I think we've learned that team sports isn't really his
thing. He is interseted in karate and we'll start that soon. He also loves
golf, which he does with his dad. He was in cubscouts last year. He
liked/likes that so I think we are both figuring out what works.

The 5yo will probably enjoy most sports but we haven't tried any yet.

I've totally bombed out on lots of gifts too. They don't actually ask
for/beg for anything which is great but it makes it hard to know what to
buy. Oh - they want a 4 wheeler but that isn't happening ;-). You'd
think I'd know my own kids better!

I don't actually care if they stick with it as long as they finish the
season.
--
Nikki, mama to
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
Brock 4/06
Ben 4/06

I didnt let my kids stick to one thing until teenage.
I believe kids dont know what they like until they have tried lots of
things.
So every term of school (sometimes they will go 2 terms) I get them into
something different.
Since 5 they have tried, dancing, bowling, gymnastics, soccor, indoor
cricket, guitar, piano. Swimming, athletic, hockey etc
my eldest is now 12 and my middle is 10 and they both have chosen cricket to
stick to. I would prefur they try out some more things, but they both LOVE
it, and i know will stick to it, without my urging.
All the best
Fiona
wrote in message
ups.com...
Can anyone relate to me with not knowing what your kids are interested
in?
I put one in karate and he seems to like it but the other two I have no
clue. They are just kids but I can't get them to stick to one thing.

Grahame wrote:
I didnt let my kids stick to one thing until teenage.
I believe kids dont know what they like until they have tried lots of
things.
So every term of school (sometimes they will go 2 terms) I get them into
something different.
Since 5 they have tried, dancing, bowling, gymnastics, soccor, indoor
cricket, guitar, piano. Swimming, athletic, hockey etc
my eldest is now 12 and my middle is 10 and they both have chosen cricket to
stick to. I would prefur they try out some more things, but they both LOVE
it, and i know will stick to it, without my urging.

Did they ever want to stick with anything before
they were teenagers? I can't imagine insisting that mine
give up the things they liked, and certainly wouldn't be
too keen making the investment in musical instruments
for things that would change that quickly. They're free
to try out new activities (so long as the schedule and
budget permit), but I'm not sure why I'd insist they
drop activities they enjoy. I think there's a lot of
value in developing a passion for something and sticking
with it, though I don't think you can force that.
It seems beneficial enough that I wouldn't try to
thwart it, though.

Best wishes,
Ericka

Grahame wrote:
I didnt let my kids stick to one thing until teenage.
I believe kids dont know what they like until they have tried lots of
things.

I too think that kids need to try lots of things, but I also believe
that there are some things that kids need to do for a long time in
order to have a good idea of whether they are interested or not.

Music is one of those things that one needs to practice over an
extended time. I think music is important so I made it a priority.
DD#1 played piano, alto clarinet and chimes, and her children have
also all played piano and some other instrument. DD#2 quit piano as
soon as I would let her, but she played bass clarinet in the band in
HS (and bass drum in the marching band). Her son plays a brass
instrument. DD#3 was the same but she dropped it before HS because of
horses. Neither dd#2 nor dd#3 have pianos, which is unfortunate. DS
was a singer. His children are very musical - the oldest boy plays
guitar well enough to get into gifted and talented school where he
started on violin and trumpet, and his sister plays the keyboard.

I think forcing kids to switch sports/interests is a cop-out and is
detrimental.to their forming an interest in something to the extent
that they will keep on with it because if they don't learn to a
certain level when they are young, they will always be behind which
will be discouraging.. If they are really interested and want to be
at the top level at (for instance) figure skating, the system is set
up for them to reach certain levels at certain ages.

OTOH there are things that when the kid tries them, they just aren't a
good fit. My mother had my sister and me in ballet - my sister loved
it. I wasn't that interested. My sister also loved theatre, and I
didn't. DD#1 and 2 also tried ballet and gymnastics, but that wasn't
something that they kept up with. My dgd started gymnastics late
(like at age 9) and was definitely behind her friends.

DD#3 was always interested in horses, and started riding when she was
about 4. She was competing on a national level by the time she was
14. She's now a professional horse trainer and judge. In the case of
horses, not only do you have to learn how to do it yourself, but you
have to train your horse.

DD#2 decided that she wanted to be on a swim team at age 6, and when I
finally gave in and let her join 2 years later, she took the whole
family with her, and I ended up coaching. None of them were world
class swimmers, but they all enjoy swimming and are pretty good at it.

So judgment is required and really thinking about what would be best
for individual kids - not just what is most convenient for you, or
what you liked or didn't like at their age. There's no blueprint for
a kid that will tell you what things he will be interested in and will
shine at.

Hi --

We let our boys experiment with a wide variety of activities, both via
after school/weekend programs and via summer camp. Between them they've
done art, soccer, baseball, tae kwon do, hands on science (a terrific
enrichment program), robotics, creative writing workshops, cooking,
swimming, newspaper writing ... that covers most of it. We haven't yet
had an experience where a child requested an activity and then didn't
want to stick it out.

We didn't offer them a choice about a musical instrument, though. We
started them on Suzuki method violin at age 3 and quitting is not an
option. It's been interesting to see how and why their interest waxes
and wanes ... One thing I'm seeing is that lessons aren't sufficient for
my 10-year old. To maintain his interest he really needs a regular
ensemble experience.

In general, it's always interesting to see how their interests change.
DS1, for example, hated team sports as a little boy. But in 4th grade
he joined a recreational team, and now soccer is one of his favorite
activities. DS2 diligently took tae kwon do for several years, dropped
out two years ago, requested to do tae kwon do camp for a week this
summer, and now can't wait to start regular classes again. We're also
seeing an interest in cooking resurface.

I hope these thoughts help,
--Beth Kevles

http://web.mit.edu/kevles/www/nomilk.html -- a page for the milk-allergic
Disclaimer: Nothing in this message should be construed as medical
advice. Please consult with your own medical practicioner.

NOTE: No email is read at my MIT address. Use the AOL one if you would
like me to reply.

My daughter liked gymnstics alot, and ended up doing that for a yr.....we
stoped her after that, because her school work was suffering, and she was
training 5 times week!
But then she continued that at school, and its the cricket that has won
over.
I also think some things need a little time to see if you like it or not.
But all my kids turned out to be sporty, so they like anything sporty
really.
I just remember my parents MAKING me do physical culture. I HATED it, and
when I gave it up after a few months, they never let me try ANYTHING again
saying I never "stuck to anything"
I vowed I would allow my kids to try many many things, till they decide what
THEY really like.
I would say I ripped things they liked away from them, I just encouraged
them to try something new....and if they didnt like it after a term or so,
they could go back to what they liked.
Anyway, they seem happy
"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
. ..
Grahame wrote:
I didnt let my kids stick to one thing until teenage.
I believe kids dont know what they like until they have tried lots of
things.
So every term of school (sometimes they will go 2 terms) I get them into
something different.
Since 5 they have tried, dancing, bowling, gymnastics, soccor, indoor
cricket, guitar, piano. Swimming, athletic, hockey etc
my eldest is now 12 and my middle is 10 and they both have chosen cricket
to stick to. I would prefur they try out some more things, but they both
LOVE it, and i know will stick to it, without my urging.

Did they ever want to stick with anything before
they were teenagers? I can't imagine insisting that mine
give up the things they liked, and certainly wouldn't be
too keen making the investment in musical instruments
for things that would change that quickly. They're free
to try out new activities (so long as the schedule and
budget permit), but I'm not sure why I'd insist they
drop activities they enjoy. I think there's a lot of
value in developing a passion for something and sticking
with it, though I don't think you can force that.
It seems beneficial enough that I wouldn't try to
thwart it, though.

Best wishes,
Ericka

In article ,
"Grahame" wrote:

I just remember my parents MAKING me do physical culture. I HATED it, and
when I gave it up after a few months, they never let me try ANYTHING again
saying I never "stuck to anything"

Gosh -- I had a similar experience with hating "Fizzy" from Day One -- I was
there because my motor skills were poor and Mum was hoping this would improve
them. Every week I begged not to go. I ended up with the Attendance badge
:-/ Fortunately Mum gave up at the end of the year. We didn't have much
money for extras, so I was in Brownies for a few years, and had two years of
music lessons in late high school. Also driving lessons.

--
Chookie -- Sydney, Australia
(Replace "foulspambegone" with "optushome" to reply)

"Parenthood is like the modern stone washing process for denim jeans. You may
start out crisp, neat and tough, but you end up pale, limp and wrinkled."
Kerry Cue

Grahame wrote:
My daughter liked gymnstics alot, and ended up doing that for a yr.....we
stoped her after that, because her school work was suffering, and she was
training 5 times week!
But then she continued that at school, and its the cricket that has won
over.
I also think some things need a little time to see if you like it or not.
But all my kids turned out to be sporty, so they like anything sporty
really.
I just remember my parents MAKING me do physical culture. I HATED it, and
when I gave it up after a few months, they never let me try ANYTHING again
saying I never "stuck to anything"
I vowed I would allow my kids to try many many things, till they decide what
THEY really like.
I would say I ripped things they liked away from them, I just encouraged
them to try something new....and if they didnt like it after a term or so,
they could go back to what they liked.
Anyway, they seem happy

If they're happy, that's the main thing. Mine have
enjoyed some activities that really benefit from an early
start and long term participation, so given that they don't
want to give them up, I don't have any motivation to insist
they try anything else. I'm sure there are other things
they'd enjoy, and maybe they're missing out on the thing
they'd enjoy the most, but if they love what they're doing
now that's good enough for me ;-)

Best wishes,
Ericka