6 month old - cosleeping to crib?

Hello everyone...

Our 6 month old boy (our first and only so far) has been cosleeping
with us since he was born back in May.

We have a crib but he hasn't used it one bit. He needs to be in bed or
in our arms (mine - i'm the daddy by the way) to take naps.

We are moving into our first house this weekend coming and he'll have
his own room (in an apartment now).

We want to start some good sleeping habits , not only because i snore
(which he might be used to anyway, but i do wonder if it makes him
sleep less soundly) but we want him to start to learn self worth or
what-have-you , you know, confidence and all that.

We're going to have to do it eventually, we don't want him sleeping
with us past 1 year.

Is now the time to do it as far as the "best" time, meaning, now is a
less difficult time compared to 9, 12 months?

He can't sit himself up on his own yet, so of course he can't stand on
his own either.

We LOVE him sleeping with us, but really it does need to end at
somepoint.

Thanks!
Paul & Nancy

On Nov 26, 4:08�pm, Psalm Nuclei wrote:
Hello everyone...

Our 6 month old boy (our first and only so far) has been cosleeping
with us since he was born back in May.

We have a crib but he hasn't used it one bit. He needs to be in bed or
in our arms (mine - i'm the daddy by the way) to take naps.

We are moving into our first house this weekend coming and he'll have
his own room (in an apartment now).

We want to start some good sleeping habits , not only because i snore
(which he might be used to anyway, but i do wonder if it makes him
sleep less soundly) but we want him to start to learn self worth or
what-have-you , you know, confidence and all that.

We're going to have to do it eventually, we don't want him sleeping
with us past 1 year.

Is now the time to do it as far as the "best" time, meaning, now is a
less difficult time compared to 9, 12 months?

He can't sit himself up on his own yet, so of course he can't stand on
his own either.

We LOVE him sleeping with us, but really it does need to end at
somepoint.

Thanks!
Paul & Nancy

I've heard many different techniques, but we placed our baby's crib
right next to our bed (with rales on both sides still and up) and he
has been a great sleeper. He would just peek over the side bumper pad
at me each morning and smile. Such a breeze really. He prefers being
read to, rocked, and placed into his crib with a musical aquarium
mobile thing attached to the side and playing, and he is now just over
2 years old. He doesn't like it stone silent. He has had his own room
now, the same room since we moved our bed out and he was used to his
room, since before the age of 1. I can't imagine suffering through
transition for years such as some people I know have done all the way
through with even a 6-y/o. All of my kids slept in their own cribs,
have never been left to cry it out, have joined us in our beds on bad-
dream nights or thunderstorm nights, etc., and we've never had any
sleep issues. I believe the sooner they learn to fall asleep, fall
back to sleep, etc. on their own, the better. The older they get, the
more they can communicate they don't want to do it alone, because they
won't know how, and the more it tugs at your heart, even if you are
unable to do the family bed thing, That doesn't mean I advocate
plopping them down and leaving the room while they scream their heads
off, just that they can and do get used to being placed down very
drowsy and finishing off drifting to sleep on their own with proper
techniques. On the other hand, some kids just won't -- it's a crap
shoot IMO. lol.

Psalm Nuclei wrote:
Hello everyone...

Our 6 month old boy (our first and only so far) has been cosleeping
with us since he was born back in May.

We have a crib but he hasn't used it one bit. He needs to be in bed or
in our arms (mine - i'm the daddy by the way) to take naps.

We are moving into our first house this weekend coming and he'll have
his own room (in an apartment now).

We want to start some good sleeping habits , not only because i snore
(which he might be used to anyway, but i do wonder if it makes him
sleep less soundly) but we want him to start to learn self worth or
what-have-you , you know, confidence and all that.

I don't think that co-sleeping in any way undermines any
of those things. That said, you don't have to appeal to any of
those things to stop co-sleeping. If you want to be done with it
by a year, that's your choice and no other justification needed.

We're going to have to do it eventually, we don't want him sleeping
with us past 1 year.

Is now the time to do it as far as the "best" time, meaning, now is a
less difficult time compared to 9, 12 months?

Yes, if you want to do it, now is generally a pretty good
window of opportunity for most kids (no guarantee with any specific
kid, though ;-) ).

Best wishes,
Ericka

Psalm Nuclei wrote:
Hello everyone...

Our 6 month old boy (our first and only so far) has been cosleeping
with us since he was born back in May.

We have a crib but he hasn't used it one bit. He needs to be in bed or
in our arms (mine - i'm the daddy by the way) to take naps.

We are moving into our first house this weekend coming and he'll have
his own room (in an apartment now).

We want to start some good sleeping habits , not only because i snore
(which he might be used to anyway, but i do wonder if it makes him
sleep less soundly) but we want him to start to learn self worth or
what-have-you , you know, confidence and all that.

We're going to have to do it eventually, we don't want him sleeping
with us past 1 year.

Is now the time to do it as far as the "best" time, meaning, now is a
less difficult time compared to 9, 12 months?

He can't sit himself up on his own yet, so of course he can't stand on
his own either.

We LOVE him sleeping with us, but really it does need to end at
somepoint.

All our children transitioned from their large mobile bassinette to their
cot at around 5 or 6 months of age although they still came into our bed for
cuddles if they needed to until they no longer wanted to. So I think moving
might be a very good time to change their default sleeping place to their
cot/crib and begin that transition.

If he seems to be having a bit of trouble settling in you could try having
bedding in his room to use to keep him company or just bring him back to
your bed for a few minutes of reassurance. I suggest you don't keep him in
with you all night unless he's not well while your transitioning him to his
own sleeping place.

Psalm Nuclei wrote:
Hello everyone...

Our 6 month old boy (our first and only so far) has been cosleeping
with us since he was born back in May.

We have a crib but he hasn't used it one bit. He needs to be in bed or
in our arms (mine - i'm the daddy by the way) to take naps.

We are moving into our first house this weekend coming and he'll have
his own room (in an apartment now).

We want to start some good sleeping habits , not only because i snore
(which he might be used to anyway, but i do wonder if it makes him
sleep less soundly) but we want him to start to learn self worth or
what-have-you , you know, confidence and all that.

He'll learn that just fine regardless of where he's sleeping.
Anthropological evidence tells us that in lots of societies where
bedsharing is normal, children actually become more independent more
quickly than we would expect in this society. (See
http://tinyurl.com/2nn5lr.) I would recommend basing your decisions on
what you're happy with at each stage, not on an idea that you need to do
things a certain way with his sleeping to get him to learn confidence.
The way children learn confidence is by having parents who are loving
and caring for and gently nudging them to try new things while always
being there for them and sympathising when they do feel nervous about
something. As for sleeping arrangements, just do whatever's working for
you as a family at each stage.

We're going to have to do it eventually, we don't want him sleeping
with us past 1 year.

Is now the time to do it as far as the "best" time, meaning, now is a
less difficult time compared to 9, 12 months?

Probably best to avoid 9 months, since this is apparently a typical
sort of age for a child's sleep patterns to regress temporarily (and
then sort themselves out fairly spontanteously). Other than that, I
don't know if there's a right or a wrong age, but one thing to bear in
mind is that transitioning to a crib *and* a separate room *and* having
the upheaval of a house move all in one go is quite a bit of change. So
it might be best to leave it a few weeks and/or do the move by stages so
that he goes into his cot first and then into his own room a bit later.

He can't sit himself up on his own yet, so of course he can't stand on
his own either.

Which is probably a practical advantage. ;-)

We LOVE him sleeping with us, but really it does need to end at
somepoint.

Quite. End it at whatever point you're unhappy about having him sleep
with you.

BTW, in terms of how to do it, I found a method described in Tracey
Hogg's 'The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems' was quite useful.
Basically, after a bedtime routine you put the baby into the cot while
he's still drowsy rather than asleep. Then, if he cries, you pick him
up for a cuddle and then put him back down again. (There are slight
variations depending on age - at this age she recommends holding him for
a few minutes to calm him before putting him down, but for older babies
she recommends putting them down immediately after picking him up, so
they literally go up and then back down again.) Keep doing this until
the baby falls asleep. It should hopefully take less and less time each
night.

I found this method useful for transitioning my son (who was just over a
year old at the time). That way he wasn't left on his own crying when
he was getting used to the cot. I did find I then had to do a further
transition when I left him alone to cry for a few minutes at a time,
because, having got used to his cot, he was fighting sleep more and more
and refusing to settle, and I really had to walk out of the room to give
him the message that it was bedtime. But the method of picking him up
and then putting him down again was really useful for the *initial*
transfer and getting him used to the cot, though you have to be prepared
for a lot of crying the first time and maybe the first few times you try it.


All the best,

Sarah
--
http://www.goodenoughmummy.typepad.com

"That which can be destroyed by the truth, should be" - P. C. Hodgell

"Psalm Nuclei" wrote in message
...
Hello everyone...

Our 6 month old boy (our first and only so far) has been cosleeping
with us since he was born back in May.

We have a crib but he hasn't used it one bit. He needs to be in bed or
in our arms (mine - i'm the daddy by the way) to take naps.

We are moving into our first house this weekend coming and he'll have
his own room (in an apartment now).

We want to start some good sleeping habits , not only because i snore
(which he might be used to anyway, but i do wonder if it makes him
sleep less soundly) but we want him to start to learn self worth or
what-have-you , you know, confidence and all that.



I, personally, believe that developing good sleep habits is very important.
When Mom and Dad are not availble to sleep with a child, they still should
be able to get their sleep needs met. Not getting enough sleep is a big
problem for school systems. That said, I don't think a 6mo is going to learn
self worth and confidence by sleeping in a crib.

Whatever your reasons, there are any number of books on the subject. I would
recommend a trip to your local library.



We're going to have to do it eventually, we don't want him sleeping
with us past 1 year.

Is now the time to do it as far as the "best" time, meaning, now is a
less difficult time compared to 9, 12 months?

He can't sit himself up on his own yet, so of course he can't stand on
his own either.

We LOVE him sleeping with us, but really it does need to end at
somepoint.



Some people choose to have it end when the child is ready. But that could
see you cosleeping for years to come.


Thanks!
Paul & Nancy

Well thanks for the info everyone.

DW and I had a nice talk last night and we decided to continue
cosleeping with our baby. She likes it, I like it, he loves it, and
really, that's all that matters - his happiness.

On Nov 27, 11:58 am, Psalm Nuclei wrote:
Well thanks for the info everyone.

DW and I had a nice talk last night and we decided to continue
cosleeping with our baby. She likes it, I like it, he loves it, and
really, that's all that matters - his happiness.

You have the right to set your priorities that way, but I think
parents should consider the happiness of everyone, including
themselves, when making decisions. Parents need not be martyrs.
Unhappiness of parents may affect how they interact with their
children, and kids themselves will be happier in the long run if they
realize that other people do not view their happiness as the only or
even primary consideration.

On Tue, 27 Nov 2007 08:58:04 -0800 (PST), Psalm Nuclei
wrote:

Well thanks for the info everyone.

DW and I had a nice talk last night and we decided to continue
cosleeping with our baby. She likes it, I like it, he loves it, and
really, that's all that matters - his happiness.

Sounds great for your family, and that is what is important. I love
co-sleeping with my kidlets :-)

Nan

Beliavsky wrote:
On Nov 27, 11:58 am, Psalm Nuclei wrote:

Well thanks for the info everyone.

DW and I had a nice talk last night and we decided to continue
cosleeping with our baby. She likes it, I like it, he loves it, and
really, that's all that matters - his happiness.


You have the right to set your priorities that way, but I think
parents should consider the happiness of everyone, including
themselves, when making decisions. Parents need not be martyrs.
Unhappiness of parents may affect how they interact with their
children, and kids themselves will be happier in the long run if they
realize that other people do not view their happiness as the only or
even primary consideration.

There's nothing in the previous post to indicate that the parents are
being martyrs - it sounds like co-sleeping suits everyone.

Clisby