help me keep my son from perpetuating the cycle of abuse (very long)

"Joelle" wrote in message
...
ome psychoes are either really good at faking normal or really do care so
much for me that they are dr. jekyll when they are with me and mr. hyde
to
other people or have been mr. hyde at times in the past and are trying

eally hard not to be when they are with me but after awhile the
undercurrent of danger comes to the surface but by then I'm entangled.

SIgh. I know I'm just farting in the wind here, but honestly Lorian, if
once
or twice you meet some guy who really did "change" after you got to know
him,
well, once can happen to anyone, twice, it's time to start thinking twice,
but
if this is happening to you often or "all the time" you really do have to
look
at yourself. Most men are not Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde - and if the majority
of
the men you are attracted to are, then you have to look at yourself and
why you
are drawn to that sort of person. Or you may be expecting it of them and
you
see it when it's not there.

Yea I know, I'm being oppressive and blaming the victim. I've really sort
of
given up on you - but maybe someone else reading this who is in the same
pattern will think about it and look at what they can do to change the
pattern.


Joelle

From what she's said though, is that that was the past. She isn't dating
anyone for exactly those reasons. And I don't think that pointing out how
one falls into patterns of behaviour is victim blaming, so hopefully she
sees that.

Christine