My car!

....is toast, obviously...
We were thinking about getting a van. I had told my dad that, and he said
he would keep an eye out for something reasonable that we could afford to
buy and maintain.
My dad gave me a call a little while ago and he said he found a car for me.
Right then and there my heart skipped a beat and I held my breath for him to
finish. He said it's a 1988 Volkswagen Jetta... I had a 1986 Jetta - the
one I crashed. This new one is red and, I guess, fully loaded... Has a
remote starter, not that I really care much about that anyways, heated
seats, sunroof, A/C, power locks and windows - which I'm not too crazy about
because if your power goes out, you can't open the windows, like in the odd,
rare, extreme case that **** happens and you go off a bridge into water or
something, you're kind of screwed... But this, he says, is in awesome
condition, new tranny, but it's a gas, not diesel engine... It's also an
automatic, and, for some reason, I love my standard transmission... But
that's beside the point... I had this nerve racking fear of this car. I
think because it's basically the exact same car we had, and I now seem to be
scared of it. I'm scared of the same thing happening again, and I've
decided that no matter what, Bran's seat will be on the driver's side, since
his booster seat requires the side shoulder straps, and Amie will be in the
middle seat of the car. No one will be on the passenger's side, given that
it was the small metal window frame that cut my son's head open. With this
Jetta, seeing as it's the exact same one as I had, I can't put A's car seat
in the middle seat because it doesn't sit properly. I always had to put the
kids on the end seats, not the middle, and for me, it just made more sense
to put A's seat on driver's side and B's on passenger's side because Bran's
able to get in the car himself, and he passes me his seat belt to latch up
when I get Amie in, or he climbs in on the driver's side and sit in his
seat. Just seemed easier and the best thing to do. Now, clearly, I see it
is not.
Is this a stupid fear? Am I over acting to it all? Am I being retarded for
actually being terrified of a stupid car that I've never actually seen, and
being terrified for a silly reason? Is this normal? My dad said a van is
out because they're just too expensive to run, fuel wise, and to buy, they
are more expensive in the long run. The price for this Jetta is $2500.
That's a damn good price, and this car is from my dad's mechanic friend that
does all the mechanical work on all of our cars and specializes in imports.
The body of this car has very little rust - just a bit on the trunk. The
body, otherwise, is in great condition, and mechanically, it's sound and top
notch.
I'm still terrified of this car, though, for some reason. I didn't dare
outwardly say that to my dad... I didn't care to hear what he had to say,
and I didn't care to tell him I'm scared of a car! lol
Have I completely fallen off my rocker already? Why in sam hill am I afraid
of a car? Bran didn't seem to have any problem getting back into a car when
we left the hospital to go home the next day, yet I was shaking sitting in
the back seat of the car, and I was so scared when I drove my mom's car -
same car as mine in every way, other than hers is a turbo diesel and hers is
a 1988... I was white knuckling on the wheel, and I barely moved my hand off
the wheel to change gears when I absolutely had to. I stalled it out 2
times in a row in the parking lot of the hospital, and I felt like I had
never driven a car before, yet I've been driving stick since I was 14 with a
learner's permit, and driving on my own since I was 16. I learned on
standard, and aside from my old Ford wagon I had for 2 or 3 months, I've
always had a standard, yet I got in my mom's car at the hospital, and surely
people thought I didn't know how to drive, all because I was sitting in the
driver's seat shaking and stalling the car out because I couldn't find 1st
gear... Took me a couple blocks to kind of get the hang of it, and I partly
blamed it on my swollen and bruised knee that I kind of needed for the
clutch.
I think I really have lost it... Scared of the car, rambling on about
nothing. This car my dad has found is scaring the crap out of me. Normal
or check myself in???

--
A: Because it messes up the order in which people normally read text.
Q: Why is top-posting such a bad thing?
A: Top-posting.
Q: What is the most annoying thing on usenet?

"xkatx" wrote in message
news:aQQFf.180395$6K2.108948@edtnps90...
...is toast, obviously...
We were thinking about getting a van. I had told my dad that, and he said
he would keep an eye out for something reasonable that we could afford to
buy and maintain.
My dad gave me a call a little while ago and he said he found a car for
me. Right then and there my heart skipped a beat and I held my breath for
him to finish. He said it's a 1988 Volkswagen Jetta... I had a 1986
Jetta - the one I crashed. This new one is red and, I guess, fully
loaded... Has a remote starter, not that I really care much about that
anyways, heated seats, sunroof, A/C, power locks and windows - which I'm
not too crazy about because if your power goes out, you can't open the
windows, like in the odd, rare, extreme case that **** happens and you go
off a bridge into water or something, you're kind of screwed... But this,
he says, is in awesome condition, new tranny, but it's a gas, not diesel
engine... It's also an automatic, and, for some reason, I love my standard
transmission... But that's beside the point... I had this nerve racking
fear of this car. I think because it's basically the exact same car we
had, and I now seem to be scared of it. I'm scared of the same thing
happening again, and I've decided that no matter what, Bran's seat will be
on the driver's side, since his booster seat requires the side shoulder
straps, and Amie will be in the middle seat of the car. No one will be on
the passenger's side, given that it was the small metal window frame that
cut my son's head open. With this Jetta, seeing as it's the exact same
one as I had, I can't put A's car seat in the middle seat because it
doesn't sit properly. I always had to put the kids on the end seats, not
the middle, and for me, it just made more sense to put A's seat on
driver's side and B's on passenger's side because Bran's able to get in
the car himself, and he passes me his seat belt to latch up when I get
Amie in, or he climbs in on the driver's side and sit in his seat. Just
seemed easier and the best thing to do. Now, clearly, I see it is not.
Is this a stupid fear? Am I over acting to it all? Am I being retarded
for actually being terrified of a stupid car that I've never actually
seen, and being terrified for a silly reason? Is this normal? My dad
said a van is out because they're just too expensive to run, fuel wise,
and to buy, they are more expensive in the long run. The price for this
Jetta is $2500. That's a damn good price, and this car is from my dad's
mechanic friend that does all the mechanical work on all of our cars and
specializes in imports. The body of this car has very little rust - just a
bit on the trunk. The body, otherwise, is in great condition, and
mechanically, it's sound and top notch.
I'm still terrified of this car, though, for some reason. I didn't dare
outwardly say that to my dad... I didn't care to hear what he had to say,
and I didn't care to tell him I'm scared of a car! lol
Have I completely fallen off my rocker already? Why in sam hill am I
afraid of a car?

My son Eli had an extreme fear of being in a car with the windows rolled up
due to a car accident 2 years ago. It got to the point that he'd make
himself sick and I'd have to pull over. But winter was coming and I
couldn't drive around with my windows rolled down so I put it to him
logically.

He's been in a car approx 3-4 times a day, there are 365 days in a year,
multiply that by 8 years. He's been in a car (roughly) 11680 times in his
lifetime, yet only 1 accident. After I laid it out like that, he stopped
being afraid and has been fine ever since.

So my questions is... you know your fear is irrational (yet understandable)
but are you going to let it control you?

Christine

"CME" wrote in message
news:NXJGf.182318$6K2.35794@edtnps90...

"xkatx" wrote in message
news:aQQFf.180395$6K2.108948@edtnps90...
...is toast, obviously...
We were thinking about getting a van. I had told my dad that, and he
said he would keep an eye out for something reasonable that we could
afford to buy and maintain.
My dad gave me a call a little while ago and he said he found a car for
me. Right then and there my heart skipped a beat and I held my breath for
him to finish. He said it's a 1988 Volkswagen Jetta... I had a 1986
Jetta - the one I crashed. This new one is red and, I guess, fully
loaded... Has a remote starter, not that I really care much about that
anyways, heated seats, sunroof, A/C, power locks and windows - which I'm
not too crazy about because if your power goes out, you can't open the
windows, like in the odd, rare, extreme case that **** happens and you go
off a bridge into water or something, you're kind of screwed... But this,
he says, is in awesome condition, new tranny, but it's a gas, not diesel
engine... It's also an automatic, and, for some reason, I love my
standard transmission... But that's beside the point... I had this nerve
racking fear of this car. I think because it's basically the exact same
car we had, and I now seem to be scared of it. I'm scared of the same
thing happening again, and I've decided that no matter what, Bran's seat
will be on the driver's side, since his booster seat requires the side
shoulder straps, and Amie will be in the middle seat of the car. No one
will be on the passenger's side, given that it was the small metal window
frame that cut my son's head open. With this Jetta, seeing as it's the
exact same one as I had, I can't put A's car seat in the middle seat
because it doesn't sit properly. I always had to put the kids on the end
seats, not the middle, and for me, it just made more sense to put A's
seat on driver's side and B's on passenger's side because Bran's able to
get in the car himself, and he passes me his seat belt to latch up when I
get Amie in, or he climbs in on the driver's side and sit in his seat.
Just seemed easier and the best thing to do. Now, clearly, I see it is
not.
Is this a stupid fear? Am I over acting to it all? Am I being retarded
for actually being terrified of a stupid car that I've never actually
seen, and being terrified for a silly reason? Is this normal? My dad
said a van is out because they're just too expensive to run, fuel wise,
and to buy, they are more expensive in the long run. The price for this
Jetta is $2500. That's a damn good price, and this car is from my dad's
mechanic friend that does all the mechanical work on all of our cars and
specializes in imports. The body of this car has very little rust - just
a bit on the trunk. The body, otherwise, is in great condition, and
mechanically, it's sound and top notch.
I'm still terrified of this car, though, for some reason. I didn't dare
outwardly say that to my dad... I didn't care to hear what he had to say,
and I didn't care to tell him I'm scared of a car! lol
Have I completely fallen off my rocker already? Why in sam hill am I
afraid of a car?

My son Eli had an extreme fear of being in a car with the windows rolled
up due to a car accident 2 years ago. It got to the point that he'd make
himself sick and I'd have to pull over. But winter was coming and I
couldn't drive around with my windows rolled down so I put it to him
logically.

I remember that accident with your boys.

He's been in a car approx 3-4 times a day, there are 365 days in a year,
multiply that by 8 years. He's been in a car (roughly) 11680 times in his
lifetime, yet only 1 accident. After I laid it out like that, he stopped
being afraid and has been fine ever since.

Well, I'm sure I've been in a car more times than he has, and that does make
sense.

So my questions is... you know your fear is irrational (yet
understandable) but are you going to let it control you?

Christine

It's a stupid fear, and I do understand it. I did make it home from the
hospital in one piece, and we've gone a few times here and there in other
people's cars, yet it's me that makes the driver nervous! Both kids seem to
be just fine and normal in the car, it's me that's grabbing the dash ahead
of me and reminding the driver that the car a block ahead is braking and
slowing down, and I do try and hold my tongue... I kind of get real nervous
at a left turn, and it makes me really nervous when someone is speeding, be
it the car I'm sitting in or the cars around.
The car my dad was getting for us is messed up now. As I knew and thought,
my mom stepped in and said she didn't think it was a good idea, bla bla bla,
and now my dad is buying that car for my mom, and not us. This exact same
thing happened when my dad had bought the Accent for me, but my mom wanted
it and got it because it was newer and nicer than her car, my dad took her
car over and gave me his car. It's not that I'm not greatful and
appreciative, it's just that no matter what, there's my mom to open her
mouth and say something... It's more of a bigger disappointment than
anything, I guess, and now I'm on the hunt for a body to put my engine and
motor and all that in, since the front end is perfectly fine, and I just
replaced a whole bunch of stuff in the front end within the last month or
so. My mom just always seems to have a really good way of putting a big
damper on anything and everything.

"xkatx" wrote in message
news:UY4Hf.1208$bd4.987@edtnps84...


It's a stupid fear, and I do understand it. I did make it home from the
hospital in one piece, and we've gone a few times here and there in other
people's cars, yet it's me that makes the driver nervous! Both kids seem
to be just fine and normal in the car, it's me that's grabbing the dash
ahead of me and reminding the driver that the car a block ahead is braking
and slowing down, and I do try and hold my tongue... I kind of get real
nervous at a left turn, and it makes me really nervous when someone is
speeding, be it the car I'm sitting in or the cars around.
The car my dad was getting for us is messed up now. As I knew and
thought, my mom stepped in and said she didn't think it was a good idea,
bla bla bla, and now my dad is buying that car for my mom, and not us.
This exact same thing happened when my dad had bought the Accent for me,
but my mom wanted it and got it because it was newer and nicer than her
car, my dad took her car over and gave me his car. It's not that I'm not
greatful and appreciative, it's just that no matter what, there's my mom
to open her mouth and say something... It's more of a bigger
disappointment than anything, I guess, and now I'm on the hunt for a body
to put my engine and motor and all that in, since the front end is
perfectly fine, and I just replaced a whole bunch of stuff in the front
end within the last month or so. My mom just always seems to have a
really good way of putting a big damper on anything and everything.


Have you talked to her about this? It's really sad that she's jealous of
her own daughter.

Christine

"CME" wrote in message
news:GseIf.1369$jh5.874@edtnps84...

"xkatx" wrote in message
news:UY4Hf.1208$bd4.987@edtnps84...


It's a stupid fear, and I do understand it. I did make it home from the
hospital in one piece, and we've gone a few times here and there in other
people's cars, yet it's me that makes the driver nervous! Both kids seem
to be just fine and normal in the car, it's me that's grabbing the dash
ahead of me and reminding the driver that the car a block ahead is
braking and slowing down, and I do try and hold my tongue... I kind of
get real nervous at a left turn, and it makes me really nervous when
someone is speeding, be it the car I'm sitting in or the cars around.
The car my dad was getting for us is messed up now. As I knew and
thought, my mom stepped in and said she didn't think it was a good idea,
bla bla bla, and now my dad is buying that car for my mom, and not us.
This exact same thing happened when my dad had bought the Accent for me,
but my mom wanted it and got it because it was newer and nicer than her
car, my dad took her car over and gave me his car. It's not that I'm not
greatful and appreciative, it's just that no matter what, there's my mom
to open her mouth and say something... It's more of a bigger
disappointment than anything, I guess, and now I'm on the hunt for a body
to put my engine and motor and all that in, since the front end is
perfectly fine, and I just replaced a whole bunch of stuff in the front
end within the last month or so. My mom just always seems to have a
really good way of putting a big damper on anything and everything.


Have you talked to her about this? It's really sad that she's jealous of
her own daughter.

Christine

No, haven't bothered to say anything. With the Accent, it was nice that my
dad had bought this car with me in mind, thinking it was a nice little car
for me, and it was almost brand new. He got a deal on it when the car was
an insurance write off after that big storm in July a year and a half ago
due to some pretty bad hail damage to the body. My dad bought it for the
difference between what insurance gave the guy for the car and what the book
value was, so it was cheap, and perfect condition, other than the dents from
hail.

My mom said it was too nice of a car for me, and I'd just wreck it/get it
all dirty/whatever. I kind of didn't really like the car right at first,
mainly because it's a 2 door, which is very inconvenient for a small child
that still needed to be buckled into a car seat, but the thought was there,
and that's kind of why. I also didn't care much for the purple color, but
that was minor. Now I am glad I had that Volkswagen instead... Diesel beats
gas by far, and the VW had 4 doors and a huge trunk. It's just the
principal, I guess. I don't really think it's really jealousy, I think it's
just that she'll find any and all excuses for anything. She does do a lot,
but with some things, I just don't get it. When it comes to some things,
it's like talking to a wall...

Amie's car seat, for example. I had called her shortly after the accident
and asked her if she could look in the garage for the old car seat I had
used for B. It's a great car seat, but not an infant car seat, it's a
5-40lbs convertible where it can recline facing back or sit up facing
forward as baby gets older and bigger. I had simply asked her to get it out
of the garage, where I knew it was for sure because they took it to store in
their garage last spring, shortly after B moved to a booster seat. We had
no need or room for this seat. She started bitching about that. She asked
me why I needed this new seat right away, and I told her that we are not
going to be using Amie's infant seat anymore - for one, it was in a major
accident, and 2, she's right around the 20lbs mark, which would mean it
would be unsafe and illegal to put her in an infant carrier. I figured why
go out and buy a brand new infant seat that we'll use for a month, maybe, or
even less, especially when I already have a seat that's good for 5-40lbs.
She started bitching and saying, "They" checked out A's seat and it was fine
to use. Manuals and public health car seat inspectors recommend destroying
any car seat involed in even a minor accident, nevermind a bigger one,
mainly because the point of a car seat is to absorb impact and protect the
child. If there are no visible cracks or damage, there is no way to tell
for sure if the actual structure inside has been damaged or weakened... I
had then got ****ed off and we started yelling like trailer park trash over
the phone, and I said that we had both decided we are not going to use that
seat, and I had simply asked her to grab the bigger one from the garage and
drop it by on her way to work, and her work is one block west and about 3
blocks south of where we live - one block out of her way to work. I had not
asked or told her to go buy me a new one or anything like that... Yet she
got ****ed off because I felt it was safest to NOT use the current seat, and
I had decided it was pointless and a waste of money we don't have to go buy
a new infant seat.... I thought it made sense... I think she just likes to
find whatever little reason she can for her to be right. Suppose there was
another accident and the seat had already been weakened and didn't hold up?
Then what? She doesn't think like that when she doesn't want to.

Now with this other Jetta that my dad found, I know my mom said something
about it, and now my dad is going to buy it - even fix it up, have my
brother put to work to take off the rust and repaint it - and it's just
everything about it that kind of ****es me off... I found another Jetta -
exact same car that I just wrote off, but it's white with blue interior, gas
and an automatic. The price seems to be right for $800, but my dad went to
see it yesterday, took it for a test drive and it kept stalling out over and
over before he got down the block. The guy is going to bring it to our
mechanic - my dad's friend - and my dad is going to see what the problem is
for stalling out and about how much it would cost to fix the problem(s) to
see if it's worth it. This could be a great temporary solution to have
something and be able to keep looking for a car body that my motor and
engine and all that could go in. I'm now so hoping that this car I found is
a go. I'm scared of this car, but I think I could be alright with it
because it's a totally different color inside and out, and again, the price
is definitely right, given it's not going to be another $800 worth of work
to get running properly!