A Parenting & kids forum. ParentingBanter.com

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » ParentingBanter.com forum » misc.kids » General
Site Map Home Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

DS and eating



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #91  
Old May 26th 07, 01:03 PM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
Welches
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 849
Default DS and eating


"toypup" wrote in message
.. .
On Fri, 25 May 2007 23:54:44 +0100, Penny Gaines wrote:


(Rice pudding is a lovely bland dish of rice cooked into mush.)


Is that the same as rice porridge? I love rice porridge. It's not so
bland when it's cooked in chicken stock.

No I don't think so. I haven't heard of rice porridge. Rice pudding is a
sweet dish (you can buy it tinned which is not very good). It's pudding rice
cooked in milk (in the oven) with a bit of butter and nutmeg on the top. You
stir brown sugar or jam into it. I haven't made it for at least 15 years so
I can't remember the recipe offhand.
Debbie


  #92  
Old May 26th 07, 01:07 PM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
Welches
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 849
Default DS and eating


"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
Clisby wrote in
link.net:
Rosalie B. wrote:

First - when I was cooking, mixed vegetables were
significantly nastier and also more expensive than buying
the vegetables separately.


I think mixed vegetables are still pretty bad (assuming you
mean the frozen kind). I don't know about cost, since I
don't buy them.


i bet she meant the canned ones. Veg-All YUCK!
and i never could figure out canned potatoes? why, why?
potatoes are available pretty much year round & they keep
well.
we happen to like frozen mixed veggies (i won't buy frozen
potatoes either, except tater tots...)
lee

We have one recipe which uses tinned potatoes. Didn't know before dh
produced that recipe you ould get tinned potatoes. Frozen potatoes? Never
noticed them except as chips. The only frozen veg I would get it frozen peas
(to eat raw mostly, we all enjoy that) and the only tinned veg is sweetcorn
which at one point was the only food item #2 would consistantly eat in
quantity. Frozen sweetcorn is horrible.
Debbie


  #93  
Old May 26th 07, 02:03 PM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
Stephanie[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 693
Default DS and eating


"Penny Gaines" wrote in message
news
Ericka Kammerer wrote:
[snip]
We never had that many choices. more than 2 veggies? More than one would
have been Thansgiving. I don't know how "normal" your dinners were. I
didn't know anyone who made that much stuff.



My grandmother was doing the cooking, and there were
six of us at the table. I think this was common for my
grandmother's era (though not so much for my parents').
You don't even want to know what Thanksgiving looked like ;-)
I think the way my grandmother cooked was very common for
her time. Food was mostly prepared relatively simply
and there were more different things on the table. I
think that is far less common today (or during my childhood--
my friends begged to eat at our house). When there's more
variety on the table, there's less cost to telling a
child "eat it or go hungry" because the child will likely
find something to eat. If you've only got a couple things
on the table, it's much harder for the parent to say
"eat it or go hungry" and the parent has much more of
an incentive to either cater to the child's limited
preferences or push the child to eat.


Surely that's due to the number of people eating. If you are preparing
enough food for six (without using much in the way of ready-prepared
food), you are much more likely to have a wide variety. If you are
only feeding four, then you need less food.



My parents made more food by increasing the volume of the individual items
rather than increasing the number of items.


Add to it that you might be
buying pre-weighed packs of vegetables, and that you are feeding people
who are less physically active (my Dad walked from our house to the
station, then from the station to his office, my husband drives), then the
quantity of feed needed is significantly less, and hence the number of
dishes will be less.

--
Penny Gaines
UK mum to three



  #94  
Old May 26th 07, 02:13 PM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
Rosalie B.
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 984
Default DS and eating

"xkatx" wrote:

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Rosalie B. wrote:
"xkatx" wrote
Yes, and if I'm not looking at her, I'm looking at the 7 month old. Or
trying to concentrate on nursing the 7 month old while I try and feed
myself and keep her hands out of my food or whatever. Or I'm trying to
listen to N tell me about his day at work or DS's day at school. I
shouldn't have to be watching the 6 year old like a hawk, but I seem to
have to anyways. Also, I've noticed, he's sneaky as can be. If,
keeping to examples already out, I am taking DD2's tray and plate away,
he'll do it then as it only takes a second for me to turn my back and it
to happen.

This strikes me as a lot more complicated than just an eating problem.
He's either doing this on purpose to be annoying or he has to do it
for some reason of his own.


It does sound like there's an element of a power
struggle. It seems like for whatever reason, he doesn't
like the rules (reasonable as they may be) and this is
his way of pushing back.

Best wishes,
Ericka


This might seem fair and reasonable.
I have noticed that the worst time for this is at dinner, and I've also
noticed his behaviour in general seems to be less than desireable at this
time of the year when the kids are all outside playing. DS has picked up a
real mouth and attitude, and it does seem to stem from these other boys.
Yes, I know DS is the only one who should be responsible for his own
behaviour like this, but it's just frustrating. The food is the first
battle I would like to pick and conquer with him.


I know we always say to pick your battles, but I'm not sure that
conquer is the word I'd use for that.

He's already proved that he doesn't have to do what you want. It will
be three or four times as difficult to 'win' this battle.

Winter comes, the neighbourhood kids aren't all outside, and he turns back
into the little boy that he can be - listens and is just a typical boy for
his age. Spring comes around and the other kids come out and well, it just
seems to bring along some major issues, and yes, at times, it does appear
that he just doesn't like the rules. I think this *might* have something to
do with the simple fact that he does have rules and expectations from us.


Is it like that RL Stevenson poem about going to bed when it is still
light out in the summer? Are the kids outside during your dinner
time?

These other kids, OTOH, don't seem to have that from their parents. It's
not uncommon for me to see one or a few of these boys in the neighbourhood
out wandering around at 9, 10pm. On a school night. Not that it matters,
but I wouldn't wander aimlessly around at that hour, I would never allow my
child to either. Many of the other kids - 97% of the time the other parents
have no idea (or seem to care) where their children are or what they're
doing.

What age are the children that are out? I don't think that there is
that much bad about having children unscheduled at some point. Or
they could be bad parents or they could be overstressed parents who
have no options.

Maybe he is a little depressed in the winter when the days are
shorter, and he has more energy in the spring and summer. Maybe if
you loosened the control a little bit, he would relax about the food
hiding thing. Or maybe you could use going out after dinner as a
reward for not hiding food. Or you could feed him his dinner
separately from the rest of the family - after everyone else has eaten
or just feed the two kids at the same time and you and your husband
eat afterwards by yourselves. Or you could let him pick a snack and
watch TV while the rest of you ate, and then feed him on his own
afterwards.

If he were my child, I would just put plastic down (I used to use old
plastic tablecloths backed with fabric that I had for picnics around
the high chair) all around his chair so that it would be impossible
for him to put food anywhere except on top of the plastic and then let
him do what he wants, and just take up the plastic and put any food
that was in that area in the garbage. I used to wash the tablecloth
also. I would refuse to fight about it, or even acknowledge it.

I know that this is not age appropriate, but if it has the effect of
making less work for you, then you will feel less stressed about it.
When you are less stressed, he will realize that he's not getting to
you and may eventually stop.

What might happen next, of course, is that he will act out in some
other and equally inappropriate, destructive and irritating way. You
may prefer the problem that you have now to some problem in the
future.

..
  #95  
Old May 26th 07, 02:34 PM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
Ericka Kammerer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 2,293
Default DS and eating

xkatx wrote:
"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...


It does sound like there's an element of a power
struggle. It seems like for whatever reason, he doesn't
like the rules (reasonable as they may be) and this is
his way of pushing back.


This might seem fair and reasonable.
I have noticed that the worst time for this is at dinner, and I've also
noticed his behaviour in general seems to be less than desireable at this
time of the year when the kids are all outside playing. DS has picked up a
real mouth and attitude, and it does seem to stem from these other boys.
Yes, I know DS is the only one who should be responsible for his own
behaviour like this, but it's just frustrating. The food is the first
battle I would like to pick and conquer with him.
Winter comes, the neighbourhood kids aren't all outside, and he turns back
into the little boy that he can be - listens and is just a typical boy for
his age. Spring comes around and the other kids come out and well, it just
seems to bring along some major issues, and yes, at times, it does appear
that he just doesn't like the rules. I think this *might* have something to
do with the simple fact that he does have rules and expectations from us.
These other kids, OTOH, don't seem to have that from their parents. It's
not uncommon for me to see one or a few of these boys in the neighbourhood
out wandering around at 9, 10pm. On a school night. Not that it matters,
but I wouldn't wander aimlessly around at that hour, I would never allow my
child to either. Many of the other kids - 97% of the time the other parents
have no idea (or seem to care) where their children are or what they're
doing.


Is it an issue in the fall as well? Have you considered
allergies as a possible culprit? I know when DS1's seasonal
allergies kick up, not only is he dealing with itchy eyes and
a runny nose, but it affects his mood and behavior as well.
He gets generally cranky and resistant. In fact, I usually
notice the behavioral change before he notices the eyes/nose/
throat issues.

Are you implying above that the food hiding thing wasn't
happening in the winter, and is a new phenomenon? I understand
from your past posts that he's a bit of a challenging child to
deal with, and that you have to be fairly firm with him. There
are some areas where kids a traditionally very capable of
mounting a resistance if they feel (rightly or wrongly) that
they've been too controlled. Potty training and eating are
the prime examples of those. They know they hold most of the
cards with these two areas. You can't make them eat, and you
can't make them go in the potty...and they know it. It may be
helpful to back off on the "you must eat X or else Y" rules
for a bit and instead concentrate on the table rules that
have to do with him being a pleasant dinner companion. For
some kids who are prone to engaging in power struggles, you
may be better off being very strict about a minimal set of
rules that are absolutely necessary, and then let him make
his own decisions in areas that aren't as important. For
instance, of the table rules you described, the ones that
seem more expendable to me would be the ones about him having
to finish every bite of what he takes and an "acceptable" amount
of what he's served. If he goes wild eating between meals,
you could specify particular snack times so he's not eating
all day and spoiling his meals. He's going to decide what to
put in his mouth anyway, so why create a power struggle over
it? And if he is responsible for cleaning up what he drops/
hides, then that isn't an effective way of getting back at
you for the rules he's resenting. Making a mess doesn't create
more work for you. It just creates more work for him. Of course,
being a clever sort, he's likely to find a way to make the
cleaning more work for you as well, so if you go in that
direction, you'll need to have a strategy in mind for how
you'll deal with it when he balks at cleaning and makes it
five times as much work as if you'd just taken care of it
yourself.

Best wishes,
Ericka
  #96  
Old May 26th 07, 05:56 PM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
Penny Gaines
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 328
Default DS and eating

Welches wrote:
[snip]
(Rice pudding is a lovely bland dish of rice cooked into mush.)


I take it you don't like it. You need it properly made not school dinners or
Ambroisier.

[snip]

Oh no, I do like it properly made.

You can now get it in Waitrose etc in the readymeal range. Seems a bit
pointless (like ready cooked jacket potatoes).

--
Penny Gaines
UK mum to three
  #97  
Old May 30th 07, 05:23 AM posted to alt.mothers,misc.kids
N ELF
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1
Default DS and eating


"RivahGal" wrote in message
oups.com...
On May 23, 9:49?am, "xkatx" wrote:
Alright, this is driving me absolutely bonkers. I really don't know what
to
do with this one, so I'm hoping someone has some ideas!
I'm x-posting (alt.mothers & misc.kids) - hope no one minds.

DS is now 6. He seems to be a fairly fussy eater, and has been for some
time. He doesn't like mushrooms. He doesn't like much for vegetables.
Not
crazy about too many fruits, other than a rare banana, watermelon,
apples.
Doesn't like yogurt, etc. I tend to 'sneak' these foods into his diet,
though, so it's not too big of a concern at times.

The problem is, though, I am getting sick and tired of certain things he
does. When eating, if he doesn't like it (and I know he doesn't) rather
than fight about it, I tell him to just pick it out and put it on the
side
of his plate. Example, eating spaghetti and I put mushrooms in it. Just
put it on the side of his plate, and let it be. The problem is, he seems
to
'hide' food he doesn't like or want. I find the toast crust shoved in
the
corner of his chair at the table - same with the green beans or lima
beans
or whatever out of his meals. He'll discreetly 'drop' the stuff he
doesn't
like under the table, under his chair or on his chair. It makes a huge
mess, and quite frankly, doing a full vacuum of the table area EVERY
meal,
3x a day, shouldn't be necessary, I don't believe. But I have to because
there's a huge mess.
It isn't always stuff he doesn't like. To me, it almost seems like he's
gone back to the toddler stage of when he just doesn't want anymore,
he'll
drop it. His cereal at breakfast - if he doesn't want to finish it, he
will
do the same dropping or hiding thing. I don't know why. I have never
forced him to eat anything more when he claims to be full, nor have I
ever
forced him to eat anything he doesn't like. He knows the rules are that
if
you try it once and don't like it, fine. He also knows the rules are
that
if he serves himself food (and he is definitely at that age where he
likes
to serve himself) then he must eat all he takes - he knows to start small
and have seconds and is usually real good with this, with the exception
of
the 'dropping' and 'hiding'. If someone else serves him, he needs to eat
an
acceptable amount and if he says he's full before the plate is done, then
there are no snacks until next meal (although he is more than welcome to
snack on the previous meal he filled up on)
I'm just wondering why he is dropping and hiding this food. It's really
starting to drive me insane. I've always thought that the food thing
wasn't
an issue. He has been doing this for quite some time - I'd say he
started
about 2 years ago, but lately it seems to be getting worse. We had to
put
DD1 back into her high chair to remove her booster seat partly because he
was hiding food under her booster seat. (other reason is this booster
has
no straps to tie her in, so she stands or gets up) He definitely makes
more
of a mess at any given meal than DD1 does, and she is only 22 months.

Sorry this is so long. Tried to offer as much info as possible!
Any ideas?


I wouldn't try to figure out WHY he's doing it (this is just my
take!), but I'd sure make him clean up the mess each time. Witht he
vacuum or cleaning it up with paper towels. But if he makes the mess,
he should clean it up. He's old enough.

I would also begin giving him very small portions of whatever you're
having. Ridiculously small. If he eats it all and wants more, give him
another small portion. In any case, I'd certainly put it on him to
clean up after himself. But then, I'm the Mean Mom.

Julie
askmeanmom.com


If he is 6 one would assume he can say why he is doing what he is doing.
You might want to try asking him.


 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
6 mos eating Nicole Breastfeeding 25 May 4th 07 09:12 PM
DD not eating well Jenny Breastfeeding 4 April 10th 07 06:31 PM
NB not eating enough Shell Breastfeeding 16 November 23rd 05 03:27 AM
what are you eating?? ted Pregnancy 25 January 28th 04 06:59 PM
How much should my 1 yo be eating?? A&G&K Breastfeeding 10 August 22nd 03 09:43 PM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 09:47 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 ParentingBanter.com.
The comments are property of their posters.