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#11
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Need help in Texas QUICK!!!
"Randy Jabsco" wrote in message s.com... First, I take allegations of abuse from women with such a grain of salt, that I hardly believe it. According to surveys, women are just as likely to abuse children yet they are nowhere near the 'just as likely' conviction rate. It just seems to me that the abuse allegation is the most abused and quickly used accusation when it comes to women and divorce, and I don't believe half of it. Yes it is the most abused and it is used for the wrong reasons and yes women are more likely to be the perpetrator of the abuse. But please do not forget that children do in circumstances get abused by men. Convicted peadophiles should lose all parental rights. Sounds like this guy has one hell of a record do you really think it safe to allow him near a child? Believe me it is not easy to get them convicted in the first place. Setting aside all of that however, which I believe does not have much bearing on the case, an adult that wishes to see his/her child, and a child that wishes to see his/her mother/father, even in the most supervised cases depending on the circumstances, should not be denied the ability to do so. Considering he shows no interest in the child it is safest to terminate parental rights now If supervised contact is allowed they will eventually allow unsupervised contact. Probably on the basis of "give him a chance to have a regular life with his child" It is always the American response (I mean no disrespect to Americans) that once a person does something that they are branded for life and cannot change. I strongly prefer to accept the Japanese way, which basically states that a person can change and once confesses his/her crime that he/she is well along his/her way to rehabilitation and reintegration into society. I kind of have my doubts about a system that brands a person all his life and prevents him from fully integrating into society by refusing him jobs, voting rights, land owning, licensing, etc. That surely isn't rehabilitation, it is branding. Randy I'm not American I'm Australian. My knowledge of peadophiles comes first hand. I was stalked by one for most of my life in an attempt to disuade my mother from laying charges. Dealing with these people is not like dealing with anyone else. Truely they are a whole breed of their own. Rehabilitation- It was him seeing his psyciatrist which brought my mother into her nightmare after avoiding him for five years. His treatment in no way changed him. It simply gave him justification of his actions. "They are my children I can do whatever I want with them" it was another twelve years after the treatment in which he stalked both of us to stop her own treatment and his incarceration. The stalking only stopped when he went to prison. He is 75 now and even so six months ago when he was released from prison I obtained a restraining order to prevent him coming anywhere near me or my children. These people are Predators! Peadophiles should not be allowed job's where they will be in contact with children to allow such is ludricrous. Would you hire a theif in a Bank ........ No I thought not. Do you want to tell his other eight known victims that they have to see their Father/Foster Father?...........Good luck! First thing they will do is snot you one! -- Randy Please don't bottom-post... It's a bitch to scroll down. "glow" wrote in message ... Please don't take offence of this I do not in any way support false allegations of Abuse to prevent contact. But a convicted paedophile should not have any contact whatsoever with any children. Such a crime should remove all the criminals rights in regards to children. (honestly I think they should all be castrated also as a prevention/punishment. Rendered infertile.) This is one thing I know from experience if she can stop any abuse before it happens and he has been convicted of such offences then she should take very step to prevent her own child becoming one of his victims. A child of that age honestly would not be able to comprehend the implications of knowing her father. These people can be manipulative and cunning, do not underestimate them. "Randy Jabsco" wrote in message s.com... Have you asked the child if she wishes to see her father or not? -- Randy Please don't bottom-post... It's a bitch to scroll down. "Cattlebarronness" wrote in message ... Well as far as how long he will be in jail I have no idea. I don't even know where he is in jail. The Attorney General is the one that told me he was back in jail. My daughter doesn't even know him because he hasn't made an attempt to see her in exactly 4 yr. to the date. So I am hoping they will not make me take her to any jail to see him. I'm just so scared right now for her. I know I sound selfish. I am her protector and feel like if I don't try my best to protector her from everything I possibly can I have failed. If he gets money in jail or not is not my concern. I don't want or need his money. In the last 4 yr.. I have improved mine and my daughters life 100 fold. She is doing well in school. She is going into 1st grade and is a year younger than the other children in her class. I have a college fund set up and have paid for medical, vision, dental and life insurance on her so I do not see where I need any money from him since I am able to provide for her with out him or his money. I'm sorry if I am just rambling on and on and on. The only thing I don't have is anyone to talk to about this. I know of no one that has been through this or is in the same situation. I guess I'm just hopping I will find something said to me as some kind of relief so I can sleep tonight and know my child is safe. Thanks for your time. |
#12
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Need help in Texas QUICK!!!
Thank you, Glow for your story. I feel for you...
May I tell you another sad story? It was a few years ago, after my wife separated. Now, we are on good terms at the moment, but before she ended up leaving without warning and without contact, for about two years. About a year or so later, I find out that there is an investigation going on from child protective services. It got started due to lice that she had contracted from another child, and let me tell you... lice is one difficult thing to get rid of, especially in a household of seven children which are giving and receiving it from/to one another (she was living with her sister, who had been rather busy obviously). Eventually, it got to a point where child protective services jumped in and started a little investigating. Again, I didn't know anything about it just yet. When they stopped by, they found that my daughter seemed to like short skirts and skimpy dressing. Had she been with me, it would have been the opposite as I am a firm believer in dressing and acting in a dignified way. But for some reason (I am not a psychologist), they associated this form of dressing as a form of past sexual abuse. So they looked into it... a separation in the household, skimpy dressing. To tell truth, I still don't know what set it all off. I do know however that neither the mother, daughter, nor anyone in the household neither had reason nor did they say anything about any abuse, Protective Services just decided it must be so. So, what happened? Well... they started taking her out of class and out of school so they can start having their private little session with the child, without any parents being present and without anyone knowing (until the child said something later). Now, if I had known about this, and had I been around, I probably would have dropped her out of school and began home schooling, as is my right. But again, I still wasn't around. Later on, the mother did end up sending her to me, out of that current state, and CPS found the laws a bit different in our state and their ability to brainwash children a little more out of their reach (but not much) It was about that time that I came into the scene and found out what was going on and had an attorney on it and CPS starting getting quite a bit more nervous. You can tell just by the way they were talking. But guess what, not much recourse here. Even the attorney did not want to take the case. Can't do much about it. Remember that case in the east a little while back where child protective services kept hauling some kids into their sessions until they finally convinced the children that they had been abused (although years later it had been proved otherwise in court, along with a nice lawsuit)? Well, let me tell you. It's true. Child Protective Services use unethical and what should be illegal tactics. They take the child in for questioning and drill the child almost like an adult without legal protection, and without the child knowing the seriousness of the situation. A literal brain washing. I even remember reading several articles on their tactics. In the end, because of a lice problem. My ex cannot get a job as a teacher's aid or childcare assistant because she is 'under suspicion' (no evidence and no convictions). I am not sure with myself, as I have never tried to work in such a capacity, but I suppose I might be there too. They could not get any evidence (obviously, none existed) despite their attempts to brainwash her. But I sure learned a little about the government... and if there is any organization that I would vote to cut funding for, it would certainly be the Child Protection Services, and Child Support Agencies, and possibly most Family Court Governmental services, as I believe they are quite possibly the most dangerous and abusive organization I have ever had the displeasure of having to read about and experience. God Help them if I ever get into office. Now, back to the subject at hand. No person's rights should ever be taken away. Nobody's... Not the Jew, not the Black Man, not the Deadbeat's, not the accused Murderer, Pedophile, nor the Rapist... That does not mean however that common sense shouldn't take place. It is true that most sexual deviants suffer from a mental condition that is quite possibly one of the most difficult to cure and they are likely to do it again. It would be absolutely stupid to not give attention to serious and proven matters such as what you describe. But, please keep in mind that from my experience and from what I have read, I am willing to believe that as much as 50% of the cases in America need to be taken another look at, as I do not believe the stories to be as they are given and prosecuted. It truly is sad too, because it causes SERIOUS damage to credibility when true reports, such as the one you described, take place. -- Randy Please don't bitch about my Top-Posting. I hate scrolling down. "glow" wrote in message ... "Randy Jabsco" wrote in message s.com... First, I take allegations of abuse from women with such a grain of salt, that I hardly believe it. According to surveys, women are just as likely to abuse children yet they are nowhere near the 'just as likely' conviction rate. It just seems to me that the abuse allegation is the most abused and quickly used accusation when it comes to women and divorce, and I don't believe half of it. Yes it is the most abused and it is used for the wrong reasons and yes women are more likely to be the perpetrator of the abuse. But please do not forget that children do in circumstances get abused by men. Convicted peadophiles should lose all parental rights. Sounds like this guy has one hell of a record do you really think it safe to allow him near a child? Believe me it is not easy to get them convicted in the first place. Setting aside all of that however, which I believe does not have much bearing on the case, an adult that wishes to see his/her child, and a child that wishes to see his/her mother/father, even in the most supervised cases depending on the circumstances, should not be denied the ability to do so. Considering he shows no interest in the child it is safest to terminate parental rights now If supervised contact is allowed they will eventually allow unsupervised contact. Probably on the basis of "give him a chance to have a regular life with his child" It is always the American response (I mean no disrespect to Americans) that once a person does something that they are branded for life and cannot change. I strongly prefer to accept the Japanese way, which basically states that a person can change and once confesses his/her crime that he/she is well along his/her way to rehabilitation and reintegration into society. I kind of have my doubts about a system that brands a person all his life and prevents him from fully integrating into society by refusing him jobs, voting rights, land owning, licensing, etc. That surely isn't rehabilitation, it is branding. Randy I'm not American I'm Australian. My knowledge of peadophiles comes first hand. I was stalked by one for most of my life in an attempt to disuade my mother from laying charges. Dealing with these people is not like dealing with anyone else. Truely they are a whole breed of their own. Rehabilitation- It was him seeing his psyciatrist which brought my mother into her nightmare after avoiding him for five years. His treatment in no way changed him. It simply gave him justification of his actions. "They are my children I can do whatever I want with them" it was another twelve years after the treatment in which he stalked both of us to stop her own treatment and his incarceration. The stalking only stopped when he went to prison. He is 75 now and even so six months ago when he was released from prison I obtained a restraining order to prevent him coming anywhere near me or my children. These people are Predators! Peadophiles should not be allowed job's where they will be in contact with children to allow such is ludricrous. Would you hire a theif in a Bank ....... No I thought not. Do you want to tell his other eight known victims that they have to see their Father/Foster Father?...........Good luck! First thing they will do is snot you one! -- Randy Please don't bottom-post... It's a bitch to scroll down. "glow" wrote in message ... Please don't take offence of this I do not in any way support false allegations of Abuse to prevent contact. But a convicted paedophile should not have any contact whatsoever with any children. Such a crime should remove all the criminals rights in regards to children. (honestly I think they should all be castrated also as a prevention/punishment. Rendered infertile.) This is one thing I know from experience if she can stop any abuse before it happens and he has been convicted of such offences then she should take very step to prevent her own child becoming one of his victims. A child of that age honestly would not be able to comprehend the implications of knowing her father. These people can be manipulative and cunning, do not underestimate them. "Randy Jabsco" wrote in message s.com... Have you asked the child if she wishes to see her father or not? -- Randy Please don't bottom-post... It's a bitch to scroll down. "Cattlebarronness" wrote in message ... Well as far as how long he will be in jail I have no idea. I don't even know where he is in jail. The Attorney General is the one that told me he was back in jail. My daughter doesn't even know him because he hasn't made an attempt to see her in exactly 4 yr. to the date. So I am hoping they will not make me take her to any jail to see him. I'm just so scared right now for her. I know I sound selfish. I am her protector and feel like if I don't try my best to protector her from everything I possibly can I have failed. If he gets money in jail or not is not my concern. I don't want or need his money. In the last 4 yr.. I have improved mine and my daughters life 100 fold. She is doing well in school. She is going into 1st grade and is a year younger than the other children in her class. I have a college fund set up and have paid for medical, vision, dental and life insurance on her so I do not see where I need any money from him since I am able to provide for her with out him or his money. I'm sorry if I am just rambling on and on and on. The only thing I don't have is anyone to talk to about this. I know of no one that has been through this or is in the same situation. I guess I'm just hopping I will find something said to me as some kind of relief so I can sleep tonight and know my child is safe. Thanks for your time. |
#13
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Need help in Texas QUICK!!!
Well here is what happened in court....They spelled the name wrong on the
papers that were served...uuggghhh...3 yrs now I'm starting to wonder if we are going to go on 4... As for asking her if she wants to see him. No I haven't asked her. She doesn't know this person and I am not going to put her through something if I don't have to. He hasn't tried to be in her life in 4 yrs. Hasn't tried to call, visit or anything of that manner. He did although give me child support of $200. at one time and a week later came back and told me he had to have it back so I gave it back to him. About a yr later he called and asked for her SS# and I told him I wouldn't give it to him because I was the one providing all support for her. He said OK and hung up. Never asked how she was, or even if he could come and see her or talk to her on the phone. So I feel as though it is his fault he doesn't have a relationship with her. The first 2 months after we split up I let him have her anytime he wanted to visit with her. He worked off shore and was home 14 days in a row and she was not in school yet so I didn't have a problem with it. Then he just quit coming around. I never told him he couldn't see her. So now as for as the all of his convictions. He has one for rape. Why am I worried about only one? Well because about a yr. ago I talked with a friend of the family and his sister-in-law. With in the last 4 yrs he has been accused by individuals that were too scared to go to the cops or the company didn't want them too. The one that the company didn't want it reported he was working out of town and broke into a female employees hotel room and tried to rape her. She had a gun and treated to shoot him before someone came in and kicked his butt. He has 8 alias. He has been back and forth in jail and prison for the last 2 to 3 yrs. He is currently in prison. Then the history goes further into the family. His father sexual molestation by contact with a child of my daughters age. His sister has kidnapped her daughter. All have at least 8 alias and one of them have up to 25. These kinds of things go on and on and on and on in his family. If it were just him I would probably agree to some kind of visitation but I am going to do all I can to keep my child safe and protected. Am I over protective? Probably. Am I in the wrong? Maybe but I don't think so. But you have to understand I don't want his money either. My daughter has everything and anything she could ever want or need. She is not overly spoiled though. Most of what she has are not toys. She has a wonderful daddy that loves her. She has her own horse, cows, cats and dogs . I know that many not mean much to some but to us it means learning to care for other things then ourselves and it also teaches responsibility. I'm sorry if I have gotten carried away but I just want you to realize what kind of life she lives now and imagine what kind of life she could be living. |
#14
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Need help in Texas QUICK!!!
"Cattlebarronness" wrote in message ... Well here is what happened in court....They spelled the name wrong on the papers that were served...uuggghhh...3 yrs now I'm starting to wonder if we are going to go on 4... As for asking her if she wants to see him. No I haven't asked her. She doesn't know this person and I am not going to put her through something if I don't have to. He hasn't tried to be in her life in 4 yrs. Hasn't tried to call, visit or anything of that manner. He did although give me child support of $200. at one time and a week later came back and told me he had to have it back so I gave it back to him. About a yr later he called and asked for her SS# and I told him I wouldn't give it to him because I was the one providing all support for her. He said OK and hung up. Never asked how she was, or even if he could come and see her or talk to her on the phone. So I feel as though it is his fault he doesn't have a relationship with her. The first 2 months after we split up I let him have her anytime he wanted to visit with her. He worked off shore and was home 14 days in a row and she was not in school yet so I didn't have a problem with it. Then he just quit coming around. I never told him he couldn't see her. So now as for as the all of his convictions. He has one for rape. Why am I worried about only one? Well because about a yr. ago I talked with a friend of the family and his sister-in-law. With in the last 4 yrs he has been accused by individuals that were too scared to go to the cops or the company didn't want them too. The one that the company didn't want it reported he was working out of town and broke into a female employees hotel room and tried to rape her. She had a gun and treated to shoot him before someone came in and kicked his butt. He has 8 alias. He has been back and forth in jail and prison for the last 2 to 3 yrs. He is currently in prison. Then the history goes further into the family. His father sexual molestation by contact with a child of my daughters age. His sister has kidnapped her daughter. All have at least 8 alias and one of them have up to 25. These kinds of things go on and on and on and on in his family. If it were just him I would probably agree to some kind of visitation but I am going to do all I can to keep my child safe and protected. Am I over protective? Probably. Am I in the wrong? Maybe but I don't think so. But you have to understand I don't want his money either. My daughter has everything and anything she could ever want or need. She is not overly spoiled though. Most of what she has are not toys. She has a wonderful daddy that loves her. She has her own horse, cows, cats and dogs . I know that many not mean much to some but to us it means learning to care for other things then ourselves and it also teaches responsibility. I'm sorry if I have gotten carried away but I just want you to realize what kind of life she lives now and imagine what kind of life she could be living. You will be able to get a restraining order against the grandfather the father is another matter if he has not already been convicted for child sex offences. Allegations are not enough in my mind to warrant having those rights forcefully removed. If you have found her a father who does take an interest and is wanting to be a father to her ask her bio father to sign over parental rights and allow your husband to adopt her. |
#15
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Need help in Texas QUICK!!!
"glow" wrote in message ... offences. Allegations are not enough in my mind to warrant having those rights forcefully removed. If you have found her a father who does take an interest and is wanting to be a father to her ask her bio father to sign over parental rights and allow your husband to adopt her. well, he's in prison ... that's pretty indicative of guilt i'd say. Maybe bio-Dad doesn't want to have anything to do with his child anyway. Why don't you find out if he'll just sign the termination papers? Is it a requirement to have a Daddy waiting in the wings to adopt? i didn't think that was the case - maybe in some states - i don't know. if you can't afford an attorney, contact legal aid --- i Know when i used to work as a paralegal at East Texas Legal Services that we had a case like that and the Dad just signed the papers dC |
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