Should I put my 3 year old back in diapers?

I just had my fourth baby a little more than a month ago. The other
three, youngest to oldest are 13 months old, two years old and three
years and two months old. The oldest, Sarah, was potty trained about
six months ago and had been doing really well until Rachel first came
home. With Rachel home, there were three girls in diapers and
something must have happened because Sarah started making in her
pants. The first couple times it happened, we weren't concerned but
after a little while, it started happening quite often, sometimes more
than once a day. Just this afternoon, I asked Sarah if she had to go
potty and she said no. I didn't want to push her so I just let it be.
Not more than 10 minutes later, she was soaked. In the past few
days, she has started wetting the bed at night also. We're really
thinking about putting her back in diapers because there seems to be
no other way. We never used pull-ups with her because they're really
expensive and they're just like diapers anyway. I'd greatly
appreciate any advice on what to do here!!

Jaime wrote in message
om...
I just had my fourth baby a little more than a month ago. The other
three, youngest to oldest are 13 months old, two years old and three
years and two months old. The oldest, Sarah, was potty trained about
six months ago and had been doing really well until Rachel first came
home. With Rachel home, there were three girls in diapers and
something must have happened because Sarah started making in her
pants. The first couple times it happened, we weren't concerned but
after a little while, it started happening quite often, sometimes more
than once a day. Just this afternoon, I asked Sarah if she had to go
potty and she said no. I didn't want to push her so I just let it be.
Not more than 10 minutes later, she was soaked. In the past few
days, she has started wetting the bed at night also. We're really
thinking about putting her back in diapers because there seems to be
no other way. We never used pull-ups with her because they're really
expensive and they're just like diapers anyway. I'd greatly
appreciate any advice on what to do here!!

I'd leave it a bit longer. Dd has been trained since last August, and a
couple of months ago I went through a bad patch in pregnancy and she started
to have more accidents. I think it was a way of guarenteeing immediate
attention. She's at the moment tending to dribble occasionally on her pants
before going, but she hasn't had an accident since then. I just made
slightly more fuss about how good she was to go, and made sure I asked her
frequently. I'm taking her to the dr's tomorrow just to rule out an
infection, as she was complaining of pain when she went, but I think it's
just a bit sore round there with the heat.
Possible making a bit of how she's a "big girl" and can do things-like maybe
spend time making a cake, which only "big girls" can do. Dd's very pleased
to tell people now that you can only do ballet if you're a "big girl" and
baby won't be able to do it until they're big. I guess also being careful
not to say "you're a big girl, big girl's don't do that" means that she can
feel more secure at not being a baby. Dd also likes being told/looking at
pictures of her as a baby, and how she was in my tummy etc.
Debbie
Ps I like the names: We were undecided until dd was born whether to call her
Rachel or Sarah. When she came out I decided she looked like a Rachel!

This could be short-lived behavior caused by the change in family
circumstance. But when I learn of a sudden change in the voiding
situation -- especially at night, I wonder about a bladder infection.

True, bladder infections usually include fever, pain on urination,
urgency, frequency. But not always.

Jaime wrote:
I just had my fourth baby a little more than a month ago. The other
three, youngest to oldest are 13 months old, two years old and three
years and two months old. The oldest, Sarah, was potty trained about
six months ago and had been doing really well until Rachel first came
home. With Rachel home, there were three girls in diapers and
something must have happened because Sarah started making in her
pants. The first couple times it happened, we weren't concerned but
after a little while, it started happening quite often, sometimes more
than once a day. Just this afternoon, I asked Sarah if she had to go
potty and she said no. I didn't want to push her so I just let it be.
Not more than 10 minutes later, she was soaked. In the past few
days, she has started wetting the bed at night also. We're really
thinking about putting her back in diapers because there seems to be
no other way. We never used pull-ups with her because they're really
expensive and they're just like diapers anyway. I'd greatly
appreciate any advice on what to do here!!

On 16 Jul 2003 13:16:21 -0700, (Jaime) wrote:

I just had my fourth baby a little more than a month ago. The other
three, youngest to oldest are 13 months old, two years old and three
years and two months old. The oldest, Sarah, was potty trained about
six months ago and had been doing really well until Rachel first came
home. With Rachel home, there were three girls in diapers and
something must have happened because Sarah started making in her
pants. The first couple times it happened, we weren't concerned but
after a little while, it started happening quite often, sometimes more
than once a day. Just this afternoon, I asked Sarah if she had to go
potty and she said no. I didn't want to push her so I just let it be.
Not more than 10 minutes later, she was soaked. In the past few
days, she has started wetting the bed at night also. We're really
thinking about putting her back in diapers because there seems to be
no other way. We never used pull-ups with her because they're really
expensive and they're just like diapers anyway. I'd greatly
appreciate any advice on what to do here!!

Often older children who are trained regress for a while. If she
doesn't mind diapers, I would put her back in them for a while,
knowing she knows what to do and will decide to do it on her own
probably not in a long time. But I would be careful that she doesn't
see this as a punishment. Be matter of fact about it and tell her
she can use panties when she decides she is ready.

You can also talk to her about being the big sister and make sure
you give her as much cuddling and attention as you can. One on
one time is important although it is hard to do with the number of
little ones you have.





--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..
Outer Limits

Very, very true. My dd had none of those symtoms, but had a raging bladder
infection.

Brandy



This could be short-lived behavior caused by the change in family
circumstance. But when I learn of a sudden change in the voiding
situation -- especially at night, I wonder about a bladder infection.

True, bladder infections usually include fever, pain on urination,
urgency, frequency. But not always.

Jaime wrote:
I just had my fourth baby a little more than a month ago. The other
three, youngest to oldest are 13 months old, two years old and three
years and two months old. The oldest, Sarah, was potty trained about
six months ago and had been doing really well until Rachel first came
home. With Rachel home, there were three girls in diapers and
something must have happened because Sarah started making in her
pants. The first couple times it happened, we weren't concerned but
after a little while, it started happening quite often, sometimes more
than once a day. Just this afternoon, I asked Sarah if she had to go
potty and she said no. I didn't want to push her so I just let it be.
Not more than 10 minutes later, she was soaked. In the past few
days, she has started wetting the bed at night also. We're really
thinking about putting her back in diapers because there seems to be
no other way. We never used pull-ups with her because they're really
expensive and they're just like diapers anyway. I'd greatly
appreciate any advice on what to do here!!

I'd greatly
appreciate any advice on what to do here!!


The best advice *I* can offer is to put her back in diapers for a while, and
slow down on the baby making a little so you can give all your children the
attention they need. Kids often regress when a new baby enters the house
because THEY want to be 'the baby' too. (Looks like your oldest never really
had the chance to be 'the baby.')

Also, realistically, it's not at all unusual for just turned 3's to be still
wetting the bed anyway. You might want to use pull-ups at night, as a way to
let her know that THIS is a normal 3 year old thing. (They don't' have to be
that expensive, because if she wakes up dry some mornings, you can re-use
them.) (Of course it isn't unsual for 3's to be in diapers during the day
either, but if she's been potty trained for 6 months, we'll assume that she's
fully capable of being dry during the day if she wants to be.)


Naomi
CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

(either remove spamblock or change address to to e-mail
reply.)

"Shannon" wrote in message ...
I say no dont, just talk to her lirk a person when she does it and explain
over adn over again where she is suppose to go eventually she will get it
also give her lots of attention for all the good things she does, after all
that is most likely why she is doing it. She wants your attention if she
only gets it for bad things or for things like that she wont stop. Im not
saying you dont give her attention btu i can see how it must be hard to give
them al the attention they need. You may feel you give her lots but maybe
she sees it differently. Good Luck!!!

Shannon
due Sept 12

I agree she just needs some special attention, give her some quality
one on one time and maybe she will come around.

OSPAM (Naomi Pardue) wrote in message ...

snip

(Looks like your oldest never really
had the chance to be 'the baby.')

Agewise that was me (along with many of my friends), oldest with
siblings arriving soon after as OP's...may explain a lot (not wanting
to "bother" people, i.e.)

MC...reserving right to act like a baby as was never allowed to as a
baby!




Also, realistically, it's not at all unusual for just turned 3's to be still
wetting the bed anyway. You might want to use pull-ups at night, as a way to
let her know that THIS is a normal 3 year old thing. (They don't' have to be
that expensive, because if she wakes up dry some mornings, you can re-use
them.) (Of course it isn't unsual for 3's to be in diapers during the day
either, but if she's been potty trained for 6 months, we'll assume that she's
fully capable of being dry during the day if she wants to be.)


Naomi
CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

(either remove spamblock or change address to to e-mail
reply.)

Friends of ours came up with an interesting suggestion
that is food for thought: have her wear nothing over the diaper, so
maybe when people see a child her age in diapers, they'll comment and
maybe she will decide she doesn't want to wear diapers anymore. Your
thoughts?

I wouldn't do it.
First of all, it really isn't all that uncommon to see 3 year olds in diapers,
so people aren't likely to comment on it.

Second, humiliation really isn't a very good form of discipline, especially in
a situation like this. (All the kid wants, probably, is some attention from her
mother. Why would you want to embarrass her in public? [The embarrment coming
less from the diapers themselves then from the running around in her underwear
aspect of it.])











Naomi
CAPPA Certified Lactation Educator

(either remove spamblock or change address to to e-mail
reply.)

"Tsu Dho Nimh" wrote in message
...
(Jaime) wrote:

Thank you all very much for your kind words of advice. After much
consideration, we've decided to put Sarah back in diapers for a little
while anyway. Friends of ours came up with an interesting suggestion
that is food for thought: have her wear nothing over the diaper, so
maybe when people see a child her age in diapers, they'll comment and
maybe she will decide she doesn't want to wear diapers anymore.

No ... humiliation will do NOTHING to help her.

It will be bad enough when her favorite things don't fit over the
diapers.

If I remember correctly, the OP's child is only three. *My* 3 year olds (I
have twins) couldn't care less about what other people say. As they came
closer to 4, they began to care a bit. But only a bit. My twins will be 4
next Friday, and we're just getting the one potty trained now. She has run
around in a diaper only, MANY times, and people have seen her and made no
comment. Why would they? Unless the OP was *soliciting* negative comments
from people....?

Now, in my case, there were complicating factors that held us back from
potty training her, namely, my being hospitalized for 2 months (we'd begun
potty training her before that, but when I went in the hospital, it was one
thing too many for my DH to deal with), and because she has a g-tube we
hadn't quite figured how to work around. Surely, our daughter could have
trained younger. But she didn't, and it doesn't make any difference - in the
2 weeks since we started, she's had all of 3 accidents, and *this* is *very*
good for her self-esteem, as we praise her highly for the behavior we want
to encourage (and since she's been almost completely successful, she gets a
lot of praise), and tell her she'll do better next time when she has an
accident. That's all.

If the OP's child is regressing due to the presence of a newborn, why
humiliate her for it? It's very common, normal behavior. It won't last.

--angela