How long will we have to wait?

SnTHoliday wrote:
My fiance has tried to find out why he stopped, and all he says is he's
working on it. That's the answer everytime. What you people don't seem
to realize is child support
is a court order.

What some people fail to realize is that if you don't have the money,
you can't pay even if you want to. If the money isn't there, it isn't
there. Maybe he got saddled with a ton of marital debt. Maybe his job
sucks. Maybe he has health problems.

Obviously we don't know the true situation, but it is conceivable that
when he says he's "working on it" he means "I don't have the money but
I'm trying to get it".

Not all non-paying NCPs are deadbeats. Maybe this guy is, maybe he
isn't. Without facts we're all just pushing our own agendas.

... We would like to get married but don't have the
money. It's not easy to take a 500.00 hit each month.


Did you ever consider maybe it's not easy (or possible) for him to take
a $500 hit every month either? Just because he has a job doesn't
necessarily mean he has a spare $500/month. That doesn't necessarily
excuse his behavior, I'm just trying to point out that these situations
are rarely as cut and dried as it seems as the radicals from either side
make it out to be.

"P. Fritz" paulfritz ATvoyager DOTnet wrote in message
...

"SnTHoliday" wrote in message
oups.com...
If anyone is familiar with the Dept of Child Support Services in CA,
can you tell me how long it takes to start receiving payments from
deadbeat dads? My fiancee' has a child support order since 2004, and
the ex has decided he just doesn't want to pay anymore. My fiancee'
provided the DCSS here in Sacramento with all the ex's information such
as home address, employer, child supprt order, etc. This situation has
us in a real bind since we are short over

Free hint for the clueless.........that is between your "fiancee' " and
her
ex, NOT you.

This case sounds suspiciously familiar. There was a guy here a few months
ago who was talking about encouraging his GF in the Bay Area to move in with
him in the Sacramento area. He wanted her to get away from the child's
father and let him be the "new daddy."

That guy, if it's a different guy, got the same advice - Stay out of it. It
is none of your business. But that guy also got the advice here that if he
forced the issue the CS might get cut off. I think this is the same guy.

"SnTHoliday" wrote in

three kids of my own. We would like to get married but don't have the
money. It's not easy to take a 500.00 hit each month.


There it is again, so what you are saying is your income is around
$2000/mth, she doesn't work and so her only contribution was the tax free
$500 from her ex. Sounds like you lot don't have much going for you and I'm
wondering why she would bother marrying a guy that can't support the
household?

Let me introduce myself, I am a real live Dead Beat with $54,000 in
arrearages and now a convicted felon as mandated by your precious Child
Support kourts. The answer to your original question, you could wait up to 6
years before you see a dime if he gets any jail time. Your best bet is to
get a better paying job and she needs to get out on her ass and earn an
income.

Glad you take so much pride in demanding a hand out, have you people no
shame?

"Moon Shyne" wrote in


Wouldn't that judgement hold true for the men here who don't think they
should have to pay child support?

Paying CS is no problem, paying the extortionate government rates is where
the real problem lies.

Just suppose some senior activist group started pushing for laws to force
siblings to finance their aging parent's medical bills to save the tax
payers money, how would you feel about the government agencies confiscating
half of your paycheck? This would all be legal becuase they passed a law to
do so!

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
k.net...

"SnTHoliday" wrote in message
oups.com...
It doesn't matter what the deadbeat ex thinks, he still has an
obligation to pay court ordered child support. Did you ever stop to
think that I am paying this man's child support? Pretty pathetic if you
ask me. You sound like another NCP who owes back
child support and the only support you do provide is to deadbeats.

Your story is changing again.

First you said your household budget was running over $500 short each
because he was not paying his CS. Now you are trying to claim you have
been
making up his CS obligation. Which is it?

English not your first language?

How about... his household is running short by approximately 500 a month
BECAUSE he is covering the other guy's unpaid support.

If you need further clarification, feel free to ask.


The facts are - If he figured out you and your fiancé were diverting his
CS
payments to pay for other children,

That's an if, not a fact.

he has the right to go to the court and
ask for relief.

Which it doesn't appear he did.

The court can force your fiancé to account for how the CS
money is spent and on whom.

No one has said that accounting for CS would be a problem. Of course, if it
hasn't been paid, it's pretty easy to account for it.


You have referred back twice to him being ordered by the court to pay.
That
court order is very specific about who he is paying for by naming the
judgment creditor and the child in addition to the amount he is to pay.

And the OP started out by asking about the child support due to the child's
mother.

If
the court's order is not being followed he can ask for a contempt of court
order and other sanctions.

He, who? The he in the court order is the one who is in contempt of court.

"Gini" wrote in message
news:lJ8bg.7339$pI5.4898@trndny05...

"Bob Whiteside" wrote
.................

The facts are - If he figured out you and your fiancé were diverting his
CS
payments to pay for other children, he has the right to go to the court
and
ask for relief. The court can force your fiancé to account for how the
CS
money is spent and on whom.
==
That's pretty clear by: "How long will we have to wait," and "we are
short over
$500.00 a month..." Clearly he doesn't think it's the child who is short,
but
"we."

Who do you think is doing the actual paying of the bills in that house, the
"we" or the child?

Pretty telling.

That you can't consider who is the person or persons actually paying the
bills?

Wanna guess why he won't answer the question of WHY
the NCP
stopped paying?

Maybe he doesn't know?

Maybe it coincided with the advent of new beau moving in his
three kids who just happen to have a mom in prison and a dad who can't
afford to
support them.

And what would any of that have to do with one man supporting his own child?


==

"SnTHoliday" wrote in message
ups.com...
My fiance has tried to find out why he stopped, and all he says is he's
working on it. That's the answer everytime. What you people don't seem
to realize is child support
is a court order. Willfully withholding child support is contempt of
court (at least in CA,
I don't know about other states). He is breaking the law and his kid is
suffering the consequences of the parents always at each other's
throats over money. We know he still has a job, he verified it last
night when my fiance asked him for money.

don't lump me into the "you people" category. I just simply asked why he
stopped paying. Most of these issues can be resolved without involving any
state agencies. In fact if the agencies are not involved chances are the
outcome will be better than involving them because no one likes to be in a
situation where they feel forced. You should be able to relate to what I
just said - regardless of the situation. She should be using the
relationship between her and her child's father to achieve the desired
outcome. It takes more work, but the outcome is more desirable.

I'm sorry I called him a deadbeat, I am upset because my fiance is very
stressed about this. She does not want me picking up the slack for her
ex not paying child support which I would gladly do if I did not have
three kids of my own. We would like to get married but don't have the
money. It's not easy to take a 500.00 hit each month.

I'm sure you are upset, and that I can relate to. I'm not sure what plans
you and your fiance are making for your wedding, but my husband and I
married on less than $5,000. Keep on thing in mind - it isn't the money you
dump into a wedding that makes a marriage, but the love & respect you have
for each other. Keeping things simple by establishing healthy relationships
between all parents is a key to love & respect. She should be talking to
him about her financial concern and how it is impacting her life. If they
have a good relationship he would do what he can to make things better. She
may consider accepting less than $500/month in support for a period of time
if he is experiencing hardship. It would help improve the overall
relationship; communication; and situation. The long-term outcome will be
more desirable.


--
Tracy
http://www.hornschuch.net/tracy/

"P. Fritz" paulfritz ATvoyager DOTnet wrote in message
...

"SnTHoliday" wrote in message
oups.com...
If anyone is familiar with the Dept of Child Support Services in CA,
can you tell me how long it takes to start receiving payments from
deadbeat dads? My fiancee' has a child support order since 2004, and
the ex has decided he just doesn't want to pay anymore. My fiancee'
provided the DCSS here in Sacramento with all the ex's information such
as home address, employer, child supprt order, etc. This situation has
us in a real bind since we are short over

Free hint for the clueless.........that is between your "fiancee' " and
her ex, NOT you.

If their finances are combined, then it does involve him.


--
Tracy
http://www.hornschuch.net/tracy/

"Tracy" wrote in

If their finances are combined, then it does involve him.

Even if this one child did not exist, their living expenses would not be
that much different.
Taking a hit means they are living far above their income, not the NCP's
problem if this Brady bunch has wedding plans they can't afford.

"Tracy" wrote

"P. Fritz" paulfritz ATvoyager DOTnet wrote

"SnTHoliday" wrote
If anyone is familiar with the Dept of Child Support Services in CA,
can you tell me how long it takes to start receiving payments from
deadbeat dads? My fiancee' has a child support order since 2004, and
the ex has decided he just doesn't want to pay anymore. My fiancee'
provided the DCSS here in Sacramento with all the ex's information such
as home address, employer, child supprt order, etc. This situation has
us in a real bind since we are short over

Free hint for the clueless.........that is between your "fiancee' " and
her ex, NOT you.

If their finances are combined, then it does involve him.
==
IF their collective financial wellbeing depends on this 500.00 to the extent
that they
can't marry without it, they have bigger issues to take care of.
==