Canadian question regarding custody

"Jess" wrote in message
...

"Teri" wrote in message
...
concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

Does he have a power of attorney?

My understanding is that this is automatic in Canada with 50/50 custody,
unless there is a specific court order preventing it.

Teri

I should probably explain a bit more. Custody is by a domestic contract
that my DH drew up when he and his X separated. The contract simply says
that custody is 50/50.

HTH, and thanks for the help!

Teri

Teri wrote:
"Slightly Graying Wolf"
wrote in message news:M4FMh.52180$DN.13484@pd7urf2no...

1) In the divorce documents who has guardianship rights? The Mother
or is it equally shared? Custody and Guardianship are two separate
issues and should be spelled out in the divorce.

John, I believe in Canada that guardianship and custody are one and
the same - unless a difference is specifically documented. DH and BM
(birth mother) have 50/50 custody/guardianship of SD.

I live on the Wet Coast of Canada, I was given the advice to make reference
to them separately when preparing the divorce documents to avoid any grey
areas in the future. I would assume it is much the same there in the Center
of the Universe :-)

John

You might think about getting a new agreement, something more official. I
know when I first split with the ex, we had a very 'loose' agreement. When
problems came along, that didn't work anymore. There was no default for
when we couldn't agree on things, and we had to have something where it was
all written in stone.

With hope and heart,
Kathleen

--
He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn,
or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other.
~ C.S.Lewis
"Teri" wrote in message
. ..
I should probably explain a bit more. Custody is by a domestic contract
that my DH drew up when he and his X separated. The contract simply says
that custody is 50/50.

HTH, and thanks for the help!

Teri

"Teri" wrote in message
. ..

"Kathleen" wrote in message
...
In my case, in the US, I had the right to be secondary contact on all the
school papers, but they erased all traces of me and my information
anyway.
I had to go in to the school with my papers.
With hope and heart,
Kathleen

I have a fear of that happening, Kathleen. I had a really good
relationship last year with SD's teacher - up until the teacher's
conference. We met with the teacher first, BM met with him the next day.
The last time I tried contacting him he wouldn't even answer my email.
I've let it go though, since SD has now moved to another school.

Teri

Where is your husband? Kathleen wasn't the Step-mom in her situation, she
was the Bio Mom. How come your husband isn't the one contacting the
teacher?

Heather

"heather m." wrote in message
...

"Teri" wrote in message

I have a fear of that happening, Kathleen. I had a really good
relationship last year with SD's teacher - up until the teacher's
conference. We met with the teacher first, BM met with him the next day.
The last time I tried contacting him he wouldn't even answer my email.
I've let it go though, since SD has now moved to another school.

Where is your husband? Kathleen wasn't the Step-mom in her situation, she
was the Bio Mom. How come your husband isn't the one contacting the
teacher?

Why should he? I'm quite capable of saying to a teacher, "Are there
specific pages that SD should be studying in her Verses book?" and "SD asked
me to bring treats to class. Would Tuesday be a good day?" It's not like
it's rocket science. DH has his things that he does with SD, and I have my
things. But DH and I both go to parent/teacher conferences - and for that
matter we both were able to go when we had treats for SD's class. That's
the entire point of a family, that everyone pitches in.

Teri

"Kathleen" wrote in message
...
You might think about getting a new agreement, something more official. I
know when I first split with the ex, we had a very 'loose' agreement.
When
problems came along, that didn't work anymore. There was no default for
when we couldn't agree on things, and we had to have something where it
was
all written in stone.

That sounds good, Kathleen, but we both know that there's no way any
contract can be written to encompass every purchase, activity, and event in
a child's life.

Teri

"Slightly Graying Wolf" wrote in
message news:FvbNh.61834$DN.1575@pd7urf2no...
Teri wrote:
"Slightly Graying Wolf"
wrote in message news:M4FMh.52180$DN.13484@pd7urf2no...

1) In the divorce documents who has guardianship rights? The Mother
or is it equally shared? Custody and Guardianship are two separate
issues and should be spelled out in the divorce.

John, I believe in Canada that guardianship and custody are one and
the same - unless a difference is specifically documented. DH and BM
(birth mother) have 50/50 custody/guardianship of SD.

I live on the Wet Coast of Canada, I was given the advice to make
reference to them separately when preparing the divorce documents to avoid
any grey areas in the future. I would assume it is much the same there in
the Center of the Universe :-)



This is what I'm working from...

http://www.attorneygeneral.jus.gov.o.../propguard.asp

This brochure describes guardianship of property of minor children in
Ontario only; each province of Canada has its own laws about children's
property.

Guardianship
In its legal sense, "guardian" refers to
1. a "guardian of the person" (described as "custody" in Ontario
legislation) or to
2. a "guardian of property" (responsible for managing the child's assets).

A child who is under the age of 18 years is called a minor.

In Ontario, a parent is automatically the "guardian of the person" of his or
her minor child. However, a parent is not automatically the "guardian of
property" of his or her minor child's property. A parent can only receive
such authority on behalf of a child by statute, court order or other
document, such as a will.

In article , Teri says...


"heather m." wrote in message
t...

"Teri" wrote in message

I have a fear of that happening, Kathleen. I had a really good
relationship last year with SD's teacher - up until the teacher's
conference. We met with the teacher first, BM met with him the next day.
The last time I tried contacting him he wouldn't even answer my email.
I've let it go though, since SD has now moved to another school.

Where is your husband? Kathleen wasn't the Step-mom in her situation, she
was the Bio Mom. How come your husband isn't the one contacting the
teacher?

Why should he? I'm quite capable of saying to a teacher, "Are there
specific pages that SD should be studying in her Verses book?" and "SD asked
me to bring treats to class. Would Tuesday be a good day?" It's not like
it's rocket science. DH has his things that he does with SD, and I have my
things. But DH and I both go to parent/teacher conferences - and for that
matter we both were able to go when we had treats for SD's class. That's
the entire point of a family, that everyone pitches in.

But why *can't* he? Families divide their tasks according to who is better
positioned to do what, also. Consider if you're just looking to make an issue
here.

Banty

Banty

"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , Teri says...


"heather m." wrote in message
et...

"Teri" wrote in message
Where is your husband? Kathleen wasn't the Step-mom in her situation,
she
was the Bio Mom. How come your husband isn't the one contacting the
teacher?

Why should he? I'm quite capable of saying to a teacher, "Are there
specific pages that SD should be studying in her Verses book?" and "SD
asked
me to bring treats to class. Would Tuesday be a good day?" It's not like
it's rocket science. DH has his things that he does with SD, and I have
my
things. But DH and I both go to parent/teacher conferences - and for that
matter we both were able to go when we had treats for SD's class. That's
the entire point of a family, that everyone pitches in.

But why *can't* he? Families divide their tasks according to who is
better
positioned to do what, also. Consider if you're just looking to make an
issue
here.

On the contrary, Banty, I'm not the one who brought up the question. I
simply came in here asking what I and SD's 'stepdad' could do with regards
to emergency permissions - because I'm concerned for my SD. Period.

I never said DH *couldn't* ask the question. I said *I* choose to do this.
These were my questions and I'm the one looking for answers. If I want to
brush SD's hair, I'll do it. I don't go around asking my DH to do it simply
because SD is my SD and he's her father. Can he do it? You'd better
believe it - and actually he usually is the one most likely to brush SD's
hair. But that doesn't mean I can't brush her hair or that I have to let
him brush it even though I want to do it.

Or to put things another way - I tend to find that people often think that
father's who've remarried abrogate their responsibilities, and they get
defensive about that. Sorry, you've got the wrong parties on that one. DH
is definitely an involved father. I simply have my own questions and I'm
the one looking for answers.

Now, does anyone actually have an answer to my inquiry - or are we just
going to keep on requiring that I offer proof that my DH is an excellent,
involved father? (Excellent father's do come along once in a while. Thank
goodness.)

Teri