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#81
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school supplies!
Banty wrote:
Where I *did* have complaints and had sympathy with other parents' complaints was the short lead times that schools and activities like Scouts sometimes give parents. If a child comes home even as far ahead as a Monday night with a homework project due Friday that calls for a different size milk carton than usually bought in that household, that can mean an extra grocery trip which impacts the household evenings where meals have to be served, activities have to be attended, bedtimes observed, etc. etc. There seemed to be an assumption of an SAH parent who can run errands any given day. Hear Hear! My school is very reasonable on costs and projects etc. I don't really have complaints about it but this one is very difficult sometimes. And to echo one of your other posts our issue last year was a shoe box. My son needed a shoe box. Well my house doesn't have shoe boxes in it. So I load up all 4 kids and go trudging down to K-Mart to find a shoe box - on a week night - when I have about 3 hours between off work and bedtime to manage what needs to be managed for 4 small kids. You can imagine how happy they all are to go shopping in the freezing cold dark winter night when they are either hungry (before supper) or tired (after supper). -- Nikki |
#82
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school supplies!
Banty wrote:
In article , Rosalie B. says... I have never been able to get over the outrage that was expressed when I asked the kids to have a ruler with metric marks on it (in addition to inches). I don't really understand why that was such a problem for them. That was the only thing I asked for that wasn't a team requirement. They acted like it took their mortgage payment or something. And yet, they were OK with being required by the school to buy a gym uniform from the school that cost $14.00 I also asked the kids to make a weather instrument and gave them directions for various things that could be made from ordinary household items. (This was 6th grade). One of the items was a rain gauge, which in simplest form is some kind of container like a tin can with straight sides, and a ruler or some markings on the side. There were more complicated things (the choice was up to them) like an anemometer which required a milk carton and some other items. One mother was highly indignant because the pointer on this instrument was made out of a "broom straw", and she "had to" go out and buy a broom to get a broom straw and also she "had to" buy milk in a different size carton than she usually got. I mean really!! She could have used a toothpick or gotten a straw from a brush or any similar object. Or she could have told him she didn't have those things, and to make something else. Well, those kind of complaints are pretty familliar to me as being on the Cub Scout committee it seems every little item or the yearly fee or fee for campling trip was objected to as something that will break the families' banks even though every effort was made to do things on the cheap. But, in the end, the five or ten dollars, or fourty dollar yearly fee would come in. Where I *did* have complaints and had sympathy with other parents' complaints was the short lead times that schools and activities like Scouts sometimes give parents. If a child comes home even as far ahead as a Monday night with a homework project due Friday that calls for a different size milk carton than usually bought in that household, that can mean an extra grocery trip which impacts the household evenings where meals have to be served, activities have to be attended, bedtimes observed, etc. etc. There seemed to be an assumption of an SAH parent who can run errands any given day. The weather instrument was a quarterly project. If the parent didn't know about it until the weekend before, it was because the child procrastinated or didn't tell them. I had a project each quarter. Really simple things like keep a notebook of observations over several weeks - write a few sentences about what you see a couple of times each week. Things like a leaf collection. This was to teach them about longer term projects. The weather instruments were a winter project after they'd had the fall project done (the notebook of observations) and the parents knew or should have known that the child had said project. I didn't give any other homework other than the quarterly project. The math teacher gave homework, the English teacher gave homework. The social studies teacher and I didn't generally give homework. I sent the parameters home at the beginning of school and each quarter. As for the rulers, parents said that they couldn't find them, specifically in the drugstore. But it wasn't as if I needed them the absolute first week of school or would have shamed the child or something for not having one. Personally, I wouldn't try to have absolutely everything that the child needed before the first day of school. Just give them the basics and wait a week or two to get the more exotic things. This is one reason why I took up the Cub Scout newsletter - to get all the information out at least 10 days ahead of the Pack Night meetings, and *all* the information out (as a Tiger mom new to Scouts I was told "but everyone already knows that because we do it that way every year .."). So consider if sometimes the problem is more in the timing of the requirements than the actual dollar costs. Banty |
#83
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school supplies!
Nikki schrieb:
Banty wrote: Where I *did* have complaints and had sympathy with other parents' complaints was the short lead times that schools and activities like Scouts sometimes give parents. If a child comes home even as far ahead as a Monday night with a homework project due Friday that calls for a different size milk carton than usually bought in that household, that can mean an extra grocery trip which impacts the household evenings where meals have to be served, activities have to be attended, bedtimes observed, etc. etc. There seemed to be an assumption of an SAH parent who can run errands any given day. Hear Hear! My school is very reasonable on costs and projects etc. I don't really have complaints about it but this one is very difficult sometimes. And to echo one of your other posts our issue last year was a shoe box. My son needed a shoe box. Well my house doesn't have shoe boxes in it. So I load up all 4 kids and go trudging down to K-Mart to find a shoe box - on a week night - when I have about 3 hours between off work and bedtime to manage what needs to be managed for 4 small kids. You can imagine how happy they all are to go shopping in the freezing cold dark winter night when they are either hungry (before supper) or tired (after supper). What is it with shoeboxes anyway? Last year we had the teacher telling the kids on monday that they need a shoebox on wednesday for an art project. Well, there isn't even a shoe shop where I live anymore. I finally scored a box in a sporting goods store. Then when I bring it in on Wednesday and tell the teacher that next time could she please give us a weeks warning she goes "Oh, I went and got some boxes yesterday anyway, just in case, you needn't have worried" well, why can't she go and get all the stupid boxes if she's going to go and get some as backup anyway, or at least let us know that it's not a huge deal if we can't find a shoebox. Another really nice thing was last year at the first parent teacher meeting thing (all parents and teachers of the grade meet in the evening to talk about the school year, requirements, what's going on in class, etc.) anyway, at some point she brings up the cost of water (we don't have fountains, the school buys bottled water and each kid pays x-amount towards it), and also that she wants to go to the theater with the kids 9€ and there's a theater coming to the school 5€, and she'd like to buy this special maths exercise book for 8€,... And then one woman chips in and says "Why don't we all give you 40€, that way we should be ok for most of the rest of the schoolyear." Uhm, sure, why don't I spend my last money on school activities instead of buying food... It was the end of the month and I went to the teacher to ask if it's ok if I give her the money next month, she looks at me in total bewilderment clearly not understanding why I ask, I explain that it's the end of the month, still, blank look, I explain that I don't have that much money left to just spend, finally she says "Yeah, whatever, just bring it in as soon as you can." And I think that's what ****es me off most really, that it's assumed we all have unlimited time to go and look for supplies and that we have unlimited funds and can just hand over cash at very short notice. cu nicole |
#84
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school supplies!
Yes, all of that plus there are some of us who have 2-3 kids and sometimes
they all need something at the same time. I seem to get nickel and dimed and even if the money won't break the bank for one child, it may have been the third request for money and sometimes we just don't have anything extra on some weeks. -- Sue (mom to three girls) "Banty" wrote in message ... In article , Ericka Kammerer says... Banty wrote: So consider if sometimes the problem is more in the timing of the requirements than the actual dollar costs. Timing is definitely an issue, but I think some of it just comes down to the fact that some people will trade money for convenience and others will trade convenience for money. Some would prefer for all the costs to be bundled and to pay one fee and be done with it. Others want the costs spread out or would prefer to get their own (either for control or because they think they can get a better deal). People just have different preferences, so it's darned hard to satisfy all (or even most) of them. Everyone would like enough lead time, of course, but even with lead time you're not going to satisfy everyone. But everyone likes lead time, or at least, nobody is hurt by lead time - no? Without leaving enough lead time, to my mind even the first effort to try to enable people to get what *the school* (or Scouts, or whoever) is requiring *of parents* isn't being made. I was more replying to Rosalie's post about incidentals that happen through the school year. So often it seemed the lead time was being counted in three or four days, when those three or four days for me, and probably other families with all parents working, weren't very good days. There's also sometimes this idea that everybody's household has certain things because, well, it seems teachers' households do. One evening we had to scramble for an ice cube! For a home experiment. Well, in our house ice cubes just isn't this handy thing. We simply refrigerate our cold drinks, any ice cubes remaining from entertaining probably had long sublimated in the freezer ;-) Boughten ice is crushed, not a cube. So we went to neighbors, and seemed to have found the evening when all our immediate neighbors were out. Good thing we knew someone four houses down. But it took a good hour for us to find an ice cube! Then there was the saga of pizza boxes. One teacher had pizza boxes designated for the base of the school project, because they were just the right size, were flat, and she planned to arrange them abutting in an array to show off for the Parent Night. So it pretty much had to be a pizza box. Well, we don't do pizza much as it's highly glycemic for me (I only get to eat the topping). So I tried to get an empty pizza box from a local pizzeria. Which they were willing to do - *after* they got all the orders from a line because the teen at the counter wasn't sure what to do and the owner was busy making the pizzas. Yes, I tried to pick the pizza box up on the way home from work close to dinner time. But to do otherwise would mean missing a lunch meeting or making an extra trip. So it was like, 45 minutes to get a pizza box. So, not that these are big huge deals that I ever complained to the teacher about. But sometimes I don't think teachers and the like realize what a parent has to do to scramble up some specified supply even if they've made an effort to require some common thing. Indeed, it would be the worst impacts because those would be things required that very evening or the next day. Banty |
#85
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school supplies!
Banty wrote:
So, not that these are big huge deals that I ever complained to the teacher about. But sometimes I don't think teachers and the like realize what a parent has to do to scramble up some specified supply even if they've made an effort to require some common thing. Indeed, it would be the worst impacts because those would be things required that very evening or the next day. Yeah, I always hope for a teacher who has multiple kids ;-) Cuts down on that sort of stuff. Best wishes, Ericka |
#86
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school supplies!
NL wrote:
Rosalie B. schrieb: Anne Rogers wrote: You also have the pressure of being expected to understand, it isn't always acceptable for adults to ask "silly" questions - and it can be I am too old to be bothered by people thinking that I am asking silly questions. And have been for a long time. I am every teacher's nightmare. Well, I don't fear asking stupid questions either, but asking questions _all the time_ in a business meeting will make everyone feel uncomfortable, besides there's usually a "time limit" meaning you can't make a 1h appointment into a 2 or 3 hour appointment because there's other people waiting. exactly, I don't not ask a question because of what other people will think of me, but in any situation, there are still things that are appropriate and things that aren't. I do ballroom dancing, when I first went to lessons, I never asked anything, because I didn't know anything, I figured I'd try and do what I was being told to do and had no idea that some things were more important than others. Then as I learnt more I'd find I did have questions, but you still have to moderate what you ask and it's actually a good skill to learn to try and work out answers for yourself, you simply can't ask every question you might think of to ask and be a reasonable member of society! Cheers Anne |
#87
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school supplies!
I don't either - and I'm not giving her a hard time. I'm also not talking about asking a work colleague or neighbor. But if a person (especially someone from another country) asks an American realtor or mortgage company rep something to the effect of, "Does it matter how much we put down?" I find it astounding that none of those people would mention PMI. I don't know what else Anne could reasonably have done to drag the information out of them if she didn't know the information was there to be dragged. Clisby, don't worry about giving me a hard time, I certainly didn't think that of you and I doubt toypup did either. But you're right, knowing what I know now I do find it quite stunning that we really didn't manage to drag it out of anyone, I don't think we even managed to get a hint of 20% being a cut off point of getting a better deal, let alone it being a point where we could find we actually couldn't even get a mortgage - which is essential knowledge and could have completely changed our plans, I do feel as if everyone we were involved with was in it for what they could get out of it and that as my husband's employer offered us significant benefits to use one of two loan companies and one real estate agency, we felt that they had failed in there responsibilities to new hires. I think the company has grown so large that it's lost some of the oversight that a smaller company has, it's very easy for something very significant to happen a lot of layers down from top management. For example, today, I got an email saying that if I had used the health website to do anything that I needed to print it all out because they were changing providers in 3 weeks time, I haven't really used it, but we've been bomarded with encouragement to set up individual profiles and health records and take questionnaires and what not, I suspect that the two clashing things have come from them being things dealt with my seperate areas and no one person having oversight - the encouragement to fill profiles and what not in probably comes from the financial side, with the idea of education and health living cutting insurance costs, but what the engine behind the website is is probably a different persons resonsiblity with different motivating factors - which is all getting rather off topic, but it illustrates some of the challenges of working for a large company that pretty much drives the economy of the area. Cheers Anne |
#88
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school supplies!
You know the interest rate, if it's fixed or not, the term, and whether or not you can prepay, I hope. Do you? Yup, those things at least are quite similar to the UK, not what they typically are but the words used! We got a pretty good fixed rate for the time, term 30 years and I can't remember the specifics of the prepay, but if it wasn't free we definitely judged that it was worth it for whatever number we considered as a minimum length of time before we sold the house. Cheers Anne |
#89
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school supplies!
If the school is in an area where the majority of students couldn't afford such a trip, then that's when you have to start appealing to local companies etc. not expecting the few that can pay to pay for everyone. I doubt VERY much if we would have been allowed to do that at a public school. Why not? I read just today of a huge amount of money travelling between a local company and the local school district, perhaps what makes it ok is that the money officially comes from a foundation, which was created by the owner of the company and technically is his choosing to do something with a portion of his earnings. But the company does directly channel a lot of money in to local schools (we could be the only school district where ALL the high schools made the national top 100 last year), it's never as simple as just handing over the money, but for every hour an employee gives their time to the school, such as volunteering in the classroom the company gives 17 dollars to the school. For every donation an employee makes to a charity, the donation is matched - I'm not sure exactly what bits of school are registered charities, but PTA fundraisers must be. It would be VERY interesting to see a break down of where money came from for the entire budget, I would guess that a significant amount does come indirectly from this one company. Cheers Anne |
#90
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school supplies!
Anne Rogers wrote:
If the school is in an area where the majority of students couldn't afford such a trip, then that's when you have to start appealing to local companies etc. not expecting the few that can pay to pay for everyone. I doubt VERY much if we would have been allowed to do that at a public school. Why not? I read just today of a huge amount of money travelling between a local company and the local school district, State laws may vary, but corporate partnerships with public schools are not uncommon. Not all corporate partners are as generous, but most of the public schools around here have some kind of relationship with a corporate partner. That said, the nature of the partnerships differs quite a bit, perhaps according to the needs of the school, perhaps according to the preferences of the company. Best wishes, Ericka |
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