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#11
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"Tiffany" wrote in message ...
Well, well..... My daughter is now a half-sister. Her fathers girlfriend had the baby over the weekend. She is excited about it..... I honestly could care less. (Yes, I am like that. If you can't take care of one kid, you don't have more.) Anyways.... I think her Grandfather is going to see the baby as soon as possible and might take her along. She will enjoy that. She has been playing phone tag with the mother but it seems all went well with the delivery. On another topic, my daughter has been bugging me to download AIM so she can talk with friends online. I had allowed that about 2 years ago until I walked in and read what was being typed. Cuss words like they were drunken sailors. So that was the end of that. Here I am trying it again. I told her it is on a trial bases and that I CAN and WILL evaluate what is being typed anytime I want. She said ok. I told her if chats get racy, it would be in her best interest to make no comments and cut out. So I see AIM doesn't archive chats. I know there are tons of computer knowledge out in this group so can someone direct me to a place I can download a program to save these chats, if need arises that I should read??? I know Yahoo archives but I don't see anything for aim. We do not have AOL btw. So she puts all her many friends on her list. I signed on just a few moments ago and one of her friends was online. I didn't speak to her..... wonder why she isn't in school!?!?!?! She has some poetry that was a bit disturbing (youth..... lol) and a link to her personal webpage. You had to click on the word motherf---- to get to it. Yeah, lovely. That page being not so great and all did give some incite. I wonder if her mother has read the site??? There are accusations in the quest book that she is giving head, a wrist cutter and some other nice things. She uses cuss words like its nothing. She talks of a make out session though the details of how far it went is vague. Did I mention that I won't have my kid over there ever again???????? Why is the mom allowing this 13 year old to go to boys houses to 'hang out'????? Am I the only mom that wouldn't allow that????? Am I the odd ball here???? Sigh..... I wish I could go back in time. (I watched the Butterfly Effect last night... .gets me to thinking, I COULD do it right.) It's good that you have the opportunity to have this bird's eye view into her buddy list. I would take most of the information you discover with a big grain of salt, though. All the kids cuss like this and talk big and are drama queens. I was shocked one day when I walked through the halls of middle school between classes. Every word was f-this and s-that... even from the honor students. Some of it might be true, too, though. But, it could be possible whether AIM was in place or not, you know? Try to check out your daughter's AIM profile and her links she offers, too. You might find a link to livejournal.com or a photobuddy site or something. It's all made publicly, so you're not really spying. Don't react or you'll burn your bridges. It's easy for kids to hide stuff. Now-a-days is no different than way-back-when. The technology is just different. It's all about trusting them with the privilege that you've given. Letting her have AIM is letting her chat with privacy. Archiving it for your reading defeats the purpose of that step. Tell her how to block IMs and remind her about the weirdos out there. My two-cents. Karen |
#12
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"Joelle" wrote in message ... id I mention that I won't have my kid over there ever again???????? Why is the mom allowing this 13 year old to go to boys houses to 'hang out'????? Am I the only mom that wouldn't allow that????? Am I the odd ball here???? You aren't the only one. But's it's a tough battle. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle I suppose the key is to stay on top of things at all times, as much as humanly possible. I just think she is to young at this point for dating or hanging out with guys. She has friends who can also go to the movies with guys..... a parent might take them but they are alone in the theater. I can tell you one thing, a lot can happen in the back of a theater. lol T |
#13
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"V" wrote in message ... "Tiffany" wrote in message ... snip On another topic, my daughter has been bugging me to download AIM so she can talk with friends online. I had allowed that about 2 years ago until I walked in and read what was being typed. Cuss words like they were drunken sailors. So that was the end of that. Here I am trying it again. I told her it is on a trial bases and that I CAN and WILL evaluate what is being typed anytime I want. She said ok. I told her if chats get racy, it would be in her best interest to make no comments and cut out. So I see AIM doesn't archive chats. I know there are tons of computer knowledge out in this group so can someone direct me to a place I can download a program to save these chats, if need arises that I should read??? I know Yahoo archives but I don't see anything for aim. We do not have AOL btw. So she puts all her many friends on her list. I signed on just a few moments ago and one of her friends was online. I didn't speak to her..... wonder why she isn't in school!?!?!?! She has some poetry that was a bit disturbing (youth..... lol) and a link to her personal webpage. You had to click on the word motherf---- to get to it. Yeah, lovely. Net Nanny. Get it. Use it. V I will look it up for sure. Thanks for the suggestion. I found only a few programs that can log AIM, outside of keystroke logging programs. I am hoping to find something free but if not, I will buy it. Do you use Net Nanny or know someone who does? Is it good, reliable? T |
#15
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"Tiffany" wrote in message ... "V" wrote in message ... "Tiffany" wrote in message ... snip On another topic, my daughter has been bugging me to download AIM so she can talk with friends online. I had allowed that about 2 years ago until I walked in and read what was being typed. Cuss words like they were drunken sailors. So that was the end of that. Here I am trying it again. I told her it is on a trial bases and that I CAN and WILL evaluate what is being typed anytime I want. She said ok. I told her if chats get racy, it would be in her best interest to make no comments and cut out. So I see AIM doesn't archive chats. I know there are tons of computer knowledge out in this group so can someone direct me to a place I can download a program to save these chats, if need arises that I should read??? I know Yahoo archives but I don't see anything for aim. We do not have AOL btw. So she puts all her many friends on her list. I signed on just a few moments ago and one of her friends was online. I didn't speak to her..... wonder why she isn't in school!?!?!?! She has some poetry that was a bit disturbing (youth..... lol) and a link to her personal webpage. You had to click on the word motherf---- to get to it. Yeah, lovely. Net Nanny. Get it. Use it. V I will look it up for sure. Thanks for the suggestion. I found only a few programs that can log AIM, outside of keystroke logging programs. I am hoping to find something free but if not, I will buy it. Do you use Net Nanny or know someone who does? Is it good, reliable? T My sister does. There are also so many new programs available. Just ask around computer software stores. Take care, V |
#16
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"V" wrote in message ...
Net Nanny. Get it. Use it. When do you stop Net Nanny? A certain age? When they move out? Do you install cameras in their room, search their backpacks, tap the phone, read their diaries? I mean, at some point, you gotta know your kid and you know when it's time to let them make some of these decisions for themselves. You can't keep them in a cave and then release them at 18 years old. Letting kids be responsible for a lot of these connections can really help them learn to make good decisions when they're older. Karen |
#17
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#18
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"Cele" wrote in message ... On 28 Sep 2004 21:11:50 -0700, (Karen O'Mara) wrote: "V" wrote in message ... Net Nanny. Get it. Use it. When do you stop Net Nanny? A certain age? When they move out? Do you install cameras in their room, search their backpacks, tap the phone, read their diaries? I mean, at some point, you gotta know your kid and you know when it's time to let them make some of these decisions for themselves. You can't keep them in a cave and then release them at 18 years old. Letting kids be responsible for a lot of these connections can really help them learn to make good decisions when they're older. Karen Absolutely. They don't wake up adults on their magic birthday without practising for adulthood first. :-) Cele I agree.......just like drinking.....I think it is absurd the way the drinking age laws are established and enforced.....as if turning 21 (or 19 across the border) somehow magically makes you mature and responsible. |
#19
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"P.Fritz" wrote in message ... "Cele" wrote in message ... On 28 Sep 2004 21:11:50 -0700, (Karen O'Mara) wrote: "V" wrote in message ... Net Nanny. Get it. Use it. When do you stop Net Nanny? A certain age? When they move out? Do you install cameras in their room, search their backpacks, tap the phone, read their diaries? I mean, at some point, you gotta know your kid and you know when it's time to let them make some of these decisions for themselves. You can't keep them in a cave and then release them at 18 years old. Letting kids be responsible for a lot of these connections can really help them learn to make good decisions when they're older. Karen Absolutely. They don't wake up adults on their magic birthday without practising for adulthood first. :-) Cele I agree.......just like drinking.....I think it is absurd the way the drinking age laws are established and enforced.....as if turning 21 (or 19 across the border) somehow magically makes you mature and responsible. I agree there is no magic age, each child is different and matures. I think though that child must be watched and protected. I believe what some are saying is that using things like Net Nanny is invasive and intrusive and child should be trusted... treated like adults in order for them to learn to act like adults. Thing is, my kid is FAR from an adult. She is a confused - barely teenager - in the body of a women, raging hormones and all. My concerns are NOT of her reading porno or looking at websites that teach you how to build a bomb. My concern is BOYS. (Yeah, Paul, you get that part, right? lol) I have already caught her talking smack on the phone, not once either. I know that she has kissed and I don't think it was just a nice one on the cheek. Where? The school yard, waiting for the buses to come. She did tell me after some prying. Would she come to me if she was thinking of taking things farther? I doubt it. No matter how I tell her to trust me, that we would have her put on BC, ect. I still can't say for sure she would talk to me first. Would she talk to another adult? I hope so. So if monitoring her online chats someday tell me that she is talking about getting it on with some dude at the next football game, and I can bring up a nice talk about it BEFORE it happens and MAYBE prevent if for another few months or years...... then I think it is well worth it. Besides, it was the condition of her being able to use AIM again. She knows it is being monitored. Sorry, ranting on and on. T |
#20
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"Tiffany" wrote in message ... "P.Fritz" wrote in message ... "Cele" wrote in message ... On 28 Sep 2004 21:11:50 -0700, (Karen O'Mara) wrote: "V" wrote in message ... Net Nanny. Get it. Use it. When do you stop Net Nanny? A certain age? When they move out? Do you install cameras in their room, search their backpacks, tap the phone, read their diaries? I mean, at some point, you gotta know your kid and you know when it's time to let them make some of these decisions for themselves. You can't keep them in a cave and then release them at 18 years old. Letting kids be responsible for a lot of these connections can really help them learn to make good decisions when they're older. Karen Absolutely. They don't wake up adults on their magic birthday without practising for adulthood first. :-) Cele I agree.......just like drinking.....I think it is absurd the way the drinking age laws are established and enforced.....as if turning 21 (or 19 across the border) somehow magically makes you mature and responsible. I agree there is no magic age, each child is different and matures. I think though that child must be watched and protected. I believe what some are saying is that using things like Net Nanny is invasive and intrusive and child should be trusted... treated like adults in order for them to learn to act like adults. Thing is, my kid is FAR from an adult. She is a confused - barely teenager - in the body of a women, raging hormones and all. My concerns are NOT of her reading porno or looking at websites that teach you how to build a bomb. My concern is BOYS. (Yeah, Paul, you get that part, right? lol) I have already caught her talking smack on the phone, not once either. I know that she has kissed and I don't think it was just a nice one on the cheek. Where? The school yard, waiting for the buses to come. She did tell me after some prying. Would she come to me if she was thinking of taking things farther? I doubt it. No matter how I tell her to trust me, that we would have her put on BC, ect. I still can't say for sure she would talk to me first. Would she talk to another adult? I hope so. So if monitoring her online chats someday tell me that she is talking about getting it on with some dude at the next football game, and I can bring up a nice talk about it BEFORE it happens and MAYBE prevent if for another few months or years...... then I think it is well worth it. Besides, it was the condition of her being able to use AIM again. She knows it is being monitored. Sorry, ranting on and on. T Forutnately, mine is still embarrassed about buying a bra. :-) But "I know it won't last too much longer |
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