I was afraid it would come to this...

Yesterday, I got a call from daycare at about 4:00 saying that they'd run
out of milk for (4-month-old) Sprogly. I'd sent 20oz, which was more than he
was eating each day last week. He's gone from 12-14oz/day pretty
consistently to about 16-18oz/day last week, and now this. I generally can
pump 14-16oz/day. So I was running a little ahead of him by about 10oz/week,
and as of last week I'm behind by about the same amount. At this rate I'll
go through my freezer stash in probably a couple of weeks, and we'll have to
start giving him formula at daycare.

My theory is that his eating pattern changed over the week-and-a-half break
I had over the holidays--he's doing less of the reverse-cycle nursing than
he was, though he does still nurse a few times each night. (I couldn't tell
you exactly how many, because neither one of us really wakes up completely.)
That, and he's just getting bigger, and eating more.

I've been afraid this was going to happen for a while. I just can't pump
more than 17oz/day at an absolute maximum, more like 16 on a regular basis.
I drink water, I take Domperidone, fenugreek, alfalfa, blessed thistle, eat
oatmeal cookies... and every minute of my day is packed full, I can't work
in any more pumping sessions. I just don't let down for the pump--at least I
don't feel a letdown, as I do when nursing--I'm only pumping out what's
built up between nursing or pumping sessions.

I'd have no problem if I were just nursing--no problem at all. I also have
no problem nursing him at night--I've gotten very adept at going right back
to sleep, and I'm used to it at this point. I'd rather nurse him every two
hours at night than to give him formula, but it doesn't look like I'll have
that choice.

I was almost in tears yesterday on the way to get to daycare to feed my
son...I'd really hoped not to have to give him formula. I don't know why it
bothers me *so* much. I am doing everything I can. Everything. I've put such
an investment into giving him my milk.

And before anyone makes the suggestion--I *must* work full-time, and can't
take time to nurse during working hours. I've been a little sensitive on
that subject lately. I've been feeling so much resentment toward
SAHMs...during my vacation it felt like I'd died and gone to heaven. I don't
mean to belittle what SAHMs do, especially those with multiple kids. I'm
just so disappointed, and it felt so easy to me to stay home with him,
compared to what I've been doing.

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving him
formula after all I've been doing?

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/

zeldabee wrote:

Yesterday, I got a call from daycare at about 4:00 saying that they'd run
out of milk for (4-month-old) Sprogly. I'd sent 20oz, which was more than he
was eating each day last week. He's gone from 12-14oz/day pretty
consistently to about 16-18oz/day last week, and now this. I generally can
pump 14-16oz/day. So I was running a little ahead of him by about 10oz/week,
and as of last week I'm behind by about the same amount. At this rate I'll
go through my freezer stash in probably a couple of weeks, and we'll have to
start giving him formula at daycare.

[snip]


And before anyone makes the suggestion--I *must* work full-time, and can't
take time to nurse during working hours. I've been a little sensitive on
that subject lately. I've been feeling so much resentment toward
SAHMs...during my vacation it felt like I'd died and gone to heaven. I don't
mean to belittle what SAHMs do, especially those with multiple kids. I'm
just so disappointed, and it felt so easy to me to stay home with him,
compared to what I've been doing.

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving him
formula after all I've been doing?



You just do. If you can't produce enough milk, then supplementing while
baby is in daycare is okay. I think many working mothers do this - not
all, but many women just can't pump out enough milk.

Keep loving and nursing your baby, but please don't stress out about
giving him formula.

Jeanne

zeldabee wrote:
Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving him
formula after all I've been doing?

Well, I reached a similar point in my brief but intense return to WOH in
the fall. (My nurslings were 9 mos old at that point). They drank more
during the day than I could pump, and my work activities led me to have
problems with let down, supply, exhaustion, etc., etc.

Between my own experience adn what I'd read here, discussed with
friends, etc., is that sometimes babies will just have a hungry day or
hungry week, and then settle down to smaller amounts of EBM during the
day. Sometimes it's related to development or growth spurts or
something physical, and thus it's temporary in nature, even if it seems
really permanent at the time.

Lots of sympathy from here....I'll keep my fingers crossed that Sprog's
increased input is temporary or that the gap atleast is temporary!
(Could it be possible for your breasts to 'catch up' to the increased
demand if S was also hungry on weekends? Not sure if that would help,
but maybe?)

If it is a permanent change, then one way to console yourself is to
repeat the advice I heard from Holly before I returned to work -- you
can consider formula just another 'solid food'. It's hard to do that if
S is not on other solids yet, but it's one way of looking at it. This
may help you feel better about the situation, even if you'd intended to
completely avoid formula, you need to follow rule number one: Feed the
baby.

Hugs,
Barbara

zeldabee wrote:
Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around
giving him formula after all I've been doing?

First off: {{{{{{hugs}}}}}} I think you need them. Whatever happens, you've
done GREAT. Don't berate yourself and feel inadequate. Things are as they
are.

Now, having got that out of the way, here are couple of things to consider
before you resign yourself to formula:

1. It's quite possible that now that you've gone back to work, your baby
will go back to nursing more at night and needing a bit less milk during the
day. It may just take a few weeks for him to get back into that pattern.
But, if he does, you may find that, at a minimum, your freezer stash lasts a
little longer than you currently think it will.

2. Since he's now in the "window" for solids introduction, what about
offering him a small amount of solids at daycare as a way to "tide him
over"? If he's showing signs of readiness by the time your freezer stash
runs out, adding some solids to his diet at 4.5 or 5 months is not likely to
harm him and even a couple of ounces of a little something in addition to
the milk you're providing might well be enough to keep him happy. One of the
reasons my oldest started solids so early (a little before 4 months,
actually, much though it chagrins me to admit it) was because I was having a
bit of trouble keeping up with him with milk. Adding just a couple of ounces
of cereal to his daily food supply was enough to avoid formula.

If you do wind up using formula, try to remind yourself that it is the
exception and your own milk is the rule. I know why it bothers you so much
to do it, as I always felt very strongly about avoiding formula myself, but
in the final analysis, what matters most is that he is fed properly and is
comfortable when you're not there to feed him. You're probably only talking
about a few ounces a day, at the most, so it's really going to represent a
very small proportion of his diet.
--
Be well, Barbara
(Julian [6], Aurora [4], and Vernon's [22 mos.] mom)

This week's special at the English Language Butcher Shop:
"Call anywhere, any time...virtually from any phone" -- prepaid phone card
dispenser

Daddy: You're up with the chickens this morning.
Aurora: No, I'm up with my dolls!

All opinions expressed in this post are well-reasoned and insightful.
Needless to say, they are not those of my Internet Service Provider, its
other subscribers or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itchin' for a
fight. -- with apologies to Michael Feldman

I'd rather nurse him every two
hours at night than to give him formula, but it doesn't look like I'll have
that choice.


Well, you *could* try waking him to feed at night for a while, until he gets
re-accustomed to that pattern. It would probably be exhausting, but it's
something to consider.

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving him
formula after all I've been doing?

I was fortunate enough never to reach quite that point, but I had plenty of
fears about it when I first went back to work. And we've certainly seen other
moms here at mkb run into the same thing. So you're definitely not alone.

One thing that may help you, if/when you do have to give him formula, is to
think of the formula as just another form of "solid food" -- one that has more
nutritional value than any other, too. At 4 months he's young to start solids
but not outrageously so; you'd have begun introducing foods other than
breastmilk to him relatively soon in any event. He'll just have formula first
instead of rice cereal or pureed banana. :-)

And BTW, if you're pumping 16 oz. a day without letting down for the pump, I'm
impressed. I never got more than 14 or so (total in two sessions) and that was
with a good letdown!

Holly
Mom to Camden, almost 3
EDD #2 6/8/04

"zeldabee" wrote in message
...
Yesterday, I got a call from daycare at about 4:00 saying that they'd run
out of milk for (4-month-old) Sprogly. I'd sent 20oz, which was more than
he
was eating each day last week. He's gone from 12-14oz/day pretty
consistently to about 16-18oz/day last week, and now this. I generally can
pump 14-16oz/day. So I was running a little ahead of him by about
10oz/week,
and as of last week I'm behind by about the same amount. At this rate I'll
go through my freezer stash in probably a couple of weeks, and we'll have
to
start giving him formula at daycare.

My theory is that his eating pattern changed over the week-and-a-half
break
I had over the holidays--he's doing less of the reverse-cycle nursing than
he was, though he does still nurse a few times each night. (I couldn't
tell
you exactly how many, because neither one of us really wakes up
completely.)
That, and he's just getting bigger, and eating more.

I've been afraid this was going to happen for a while. I just can't pump
more than 17oz/day at an absolute maximum, more like 16 on a regular
basis.
I drink water, I take Domperidone, fenugreek, alfalfa, blessed thistle,
eat
oatmeal cookies... and every minute of my day is packed full, I can't work
in any more pumping sessions. I just don't let down for the pump--at least
I
don't feel a letdown, as I do when nursing--I'm only pumping out what's
built up between nursing or pumping sessions.

I'd have no problem if I were just nursing--no problem at all. I also have
no problem nursing him at night--I've gotten very adept at going right
back
to sleep, and I'm used to it at this point. I'd rather nurse him every two
hours at night than to give him formula, but it doesn't look like I'll
have
that choice.

I was almost in tears yesterday on the way to get to daycare to feed my
son...I'd really hoped not to have to give him formula. I don't know why
it
bothers me *so* much. I am doing everything I can. Everything. I've put
such
an investment into giving him my milk.

And before anyone makes the suggestion--I *must* work full-time, and can't
take time to nurse during working hours. I've been a little sensitive on
that subject lately. I've been feeling so much resentment toward
SAHMs...during my vacation it felt like I'd died and gone to heaven. I
don't
mean to belittle what SAHMs do, especially those with multiple kids. I'm
just so disappointed, and it felt so easy to me to stay home with him,
compared to what I've been doing.

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving
him
formula after all I've been doing?

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/



I am completely ignorant because (1) I haven't pumped and (2) I haven't felt
a letdown so I only think I know what it is. So here's my question,
consider it more of a general question about pumping than an attempt to
solve your problem:

Can you pump *while* you are nursing at night to get more milk? When I'm
nursing esp. at night when I am more engorged, the other breast often drips
like crazy.

-- Dagny

"zeldabee" wrote in message
...
My theory is that his eating pattern changed over the week-and-a-half
break
I had over the holidays--he's doing less of the reverse-cycle nursing than
he was, though he does still nurse a few times each night.

I think there's a good chance your theory is correct. Can you encourage him
to nurse a little more in the evenings and at night, to get him back on his
reverse-cycle track?

Not sure how easy that would be for you. It was never a problem with my DD
since she despised the bottle and totally reverse-cycled (she ate around 6oz
of EBM each day at day care!).

Lucy

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving him
formula after all I've been doing?


I feel for you b/c I've been there. It was very hard for me. I cried in
WalMart when my husband called and said I needed to bring home formula. We'd
gone through my freezer stash and 16 oz of donor milk and I just could not keep
up any longer.

It has been a downward spiral, or course. Now Baby Joey has about 75% formula
and 25% breastmilk. I just don't have the will to sit at the pump endlessly
every day now, and I did feel pretty defeatist once that first ounce of formula
hit his tummy. I felt like I should throw in the towel immediately and just
give him 100% formula from then on (which I knew was way over the top).

If you do come to the point where you have to supplement, it is OK. That is
the good side to formula--that we DO have a choice and can utilize it when we
are not able to give breastmilk.

And it also made me feel better that for a long time, *I* was not the one
giving the formula--DH did it for weeks before it got to the point where I had
to start giving it to him when DH was not at home.

You may get back to the point where you can drop formula altogether, but in the
meantime, make wise choices and do the best you can! YOu've far exceeded what
many women will do for their babies, especially since you are back to work.

Is your day care feeding him too much? Many times centers prompt babies to
empty a bottle, or feed on a strick # of oz per hour, and actually feed the
baby more than he needs. Is there any way you can assess this?

When I was feeling a little behind the 8-ball pumping wise, I would try to
sneak in some extra pumpings on the weekends. After DS went to bed for the
evening, I would pump as much as I could, and pop it into the freezer or
fridge. By the time he woke up during the night, my body would have
re-filled itself satisfactorily.

It's extra work, but there's an end in sight. When your sprogly starts on
solids, he will need less milk, so the burden on you will be lightened, even
though he still nurses.

And, if it comes down to it, formula was invented for those who could not
feed their infants. If you are not producing enough mother's milk, then some
formula to get him through the day will not hurt him, because the bulk of
his nourishment will still come from you.

You're doing great. Just keep on!

-Shannon

"zeldabee" wrote in message
...
Yesterday, I got a call from daycare at about 4:00 saying that they'd run
out of milk for (4-month-old) Sprogly. I'd sent 20oz, which was more than
he
was eating each day last week. He's gone from 12-14oz/day pretty
consistently to about 16-18oz/day last week, and now this. I generally can
pump 14-16oz/day. So I was running a little ahead of him by about
10oz/week,
and as of last week I'm behind by about the same amount. At this rate I'll
go through my freezer stash in probably a couple of weeks, and we'll have
to
start giving him formula at daycare.

My theory is that his eating pattern changed over the week-and-a-half
break
I had over the holidays--he's doing less of the reverse-cycle nursing than
he was, though he does still nurse a few times each night. (I couldn't
tell
you exactly how many, because neither one of us really wakes up
completely.)
That, and he's just getting bigger, and eating more.

I've been afraid this was going to happen for a while. I just can't pump
more than 17oz/day at an absolute maximum, more like 16 on a regular
basis.
I drink water, I take Domperidone, fenugreek, alfalfa, blessed thistle,
eat
oatmeal cookies... and every minute of my day is packed full, I can't work
in any more pumping sessions. I just don't let down for the pump--at least
I
don't feel a letdown, as I do when nursing--I'm only pumping out what's
built up between nursing or pumping sessions.

I'd have no problem if I were just nursing--no problem at all. I also have
no problem nursing him at night--I've gotten very adept at going right
back
to sleep, and I'm used to it at this point. I'd rather nurse him every two
hours at night than to give him formula, but it doesn't look like I'll
have
that choice.

I was almost in tears yesterday on the way to get to daycare to feed my
son...I'd really hoped not to have to give him formula. I don't know why
it
bothers me *so* much. I am doing everything I can. Everything. I've put
such
an investment into giving him my milk.

And before anyone makes the suggestion--I *must* work full-time, and can't
take time to nurse during working hours. I've been a little sensitive on
that subject lately. I've been feeling so much resentment toward
SAHMs...during my vacation it felt like I'd died and gone to heaven. I
don't
mean to belittle what SAHMs do, especially those with multiple kids. I'm
just so disappointed, and it felt so easy to me to stay home with him,
compared to what I've been doing.

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving
him
formula after all I've been doing?

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/

How much domperidone are you taking and when are you taking it? I ask
because many women actually don't take enough and you can time your dosage
so you produce more at night or more during the day.

Corrine
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~
I'd rather be a mother, than anyone on earth.
Bringing up a child or two, of unpretentious birth.
I'd rather nurse a rosy babe, with warm lips on my breast,
Than wear a queen's medallion, above a heart less blest.
I'd rather tuck a little child, all safe and sound in bed.
Than twine a chain of diamonds, about my foolish head.
I'd rather wash a smudgy face, with round, bright baby eyes.
Than paint the pageantry of fame, or walk among the wise.
- Meredith Gray

"zeldabee" wrote in message
...
Yesterday, I got a call from daycare at about 4:00 saying that they'd run
out of milk for (4-month-old) Sprogly. I'd sent 20oz, which was more than
he
was eating each day last week. He's gone from 12-14oz/day pretty
consistently to about 16-18oz/day last week, and now this. I generally can
pump 14-16oz/day. So I was running a little ahead of him by about
10oz/week,
and as of last week I'm behind by about the same amount. At this rate I'll
go through my freezer stash in probably a couple of weeks, and we'll have
to
start giving him formula at daycare.

My theory is that his eating pattern changed over the week-and-a-half
break
I had over the holidays--he's doing less of the reverse-cycle nursing than
he was, though he does still nurse a few times each night. (I couldn't
tell
you exactly how many, because neither one of us really wakes up
completely.)
That, and he's just getting bigger, and eating more.

I've been afraid this was going to happen for a while. I just can't pump
more than 17oz/day at an absolute maximum, more like 16 on a regular
basis.
I drink water, I take Domperidone, fenugreek, alfalfa, blessed thistle, ea
t
oatmeal cookies... and every minute of my day is packed full, I can't work
in any more pumping sessions. I just don't let down for the pump--at least
I
don't feel a letdown, as I do when nursing--I'm only pumping out what's
built up between nursing or pumping sessions.

I'd have no problem if I were just nursing--no problem at all. I also have
no problem nursing him at night--I've gotten very adept at going right
back
to sleep, and I'm used to it at this point. I'd rather nurse him every two
hours at night than to give him formula, but it doesn't look like I'll
have
that choice.

I was almost in tears yesterday on the way to get to daycare to feed my
son...I'd really hoped not to have to give him formula. I don't know why
it
bothers me *so* much. I am doing everything I can. Everything. I've put
such
an investment into giving him my milk.

And before anyone makes the suggestion--I *must* work full-time, and can't
take time to nurse during working hours. I've been a little sensitive on
that subject lately. I've been feeling so much resentment toward
SAHMs...during my vacation it felt like I'd died and gone to heaven. I
don't
mean to belittle what SAHMs do, especially those with multiple kids. I'm
just so disappointed, and it felt so easy to me to stay home with him,
compared to what I've been doing.

Has anyone else reached this point? How do I wrap my mind around giving
him
formula after all I've been doing?

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m http://NewsReader.Com/