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Name change because parent not visiting child



 
 
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  #13  
Old November 8th 06, 01:37 PM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
CasualObserver
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 38
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never seen him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an year, can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do no want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name change.
Thanks in advance.


Your situation might be different but a lot of fathers dont visit
because they feel that they themselves are the enemy.


Wouldn't their own feelings be their own problem? Why inflict them on a
child?


I guess you have to ask why many fathers feel that way. Could it be
that they are
treated like dirt by the system? Maybe they are constantly berated by
the mothers
making them feel like an unwelcome visitors? Isnt it the gentlemen
thing to do is
not visit if you are not welcome? And still pay.

  #14  
Old November 8th 06, 07:36 PM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
MrMann
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


"DrLith" wrote in message
...
wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never seen him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an year, can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do no want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name change.
Thanks in advance.


How old is your son? Unless I'm reading you wrong (first you say the
father has "never seen him," but then say the father hasn't visited "in
over a year"), your son must still be a baby. If that's the case, it's
both too early to tell whether it will be "traumatic" for your child to
bear his father's last name and whether the father will continue to be
estranged for the rest of the child's life.


Good point.

Observation: Maybe the OP is wanting the name change for her own selfish
reasons.

  #15  
Old November 9th 06, 01:01 AM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
Moon Shyne
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 427
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very
traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never seen
him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an year,
can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do no
want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name change.
Thanks in advance.

Your situation might be different but a lot of fathers dont visit
because they feel that they themselves are the enemy.


Wouldn't their own feelings be their own problem? Why inflict them on a
child?


I guess you have to ask why many fathers feel that way. Could it be
that they are
treated like dirt by the system? Maybe they are constantly berated by
the mothers
making them feel like an unwelcome visitors? Isnt it the gentlemen
thing to do is
not visit if you are not welcome? And still pay.


There's nothing gentlemanly about walking away from your children.




  #16  
Old November 9th 06, 02:19 AM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
CasualObserver
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 38
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very
traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never seen
him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an year,
can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do no
want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name change.
Thanks in advance.

Your situation might be different but a lot of fathers dont visit
because they feel that they themselves are the enemy.

Wouldn't their own feelings be their own problem? Why inflict them on a
child?


I guess you have to ask why many fathers feel that way. Could it be
that they are
treated like dirt by the system? Maybe they are constantly berated by
the mothers
making them feel like an unwelcome visitors? Isnt it the gentlemen
thing to do is
not visit if you are not welcome? And still pay.


There's nothing gentlemanly about walking away from your children.



Tell that to the fathers who weren't gentlemen and now have restraining
orders. And btw, what does being an occasional visitor have to do with
being a father?

  #17  
Old November 9th 06, 03:32 AM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
teachrmama
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,905
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


"CasualObserver" wrote in message
ps.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of
Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very
traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never seen
him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an year,
can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason
enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do no
want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name change.
Thanks in advance.

Your situation might be different but a lot of fathers dont visit
because they feel that they themselves are the enemy.

Wouldn't their own feelings be their own problem? Why inflict them on
a
child?

I guess you have to ask why many fathers feel that way. Could it be
that they are
treated like dirt by the system? Maybe they are constantly berated by
the mothers
making them feel like an unwelcome visitors? Isnt it the gentlemen
thing to do is
not visit if you are not welcome? And still pay.


There's nothing gentlemanly about walking away from your children.



Tell that to the fathers who weren't gentlemen and now have restraining
orders. And btw, what does being an occasional visitor have to do with
being a father?


Gosh, Cas, what's the matter with you? A GENTLEMAN visits his child "when
ordered" (by the court or by mommy.) Visiting the child has NOTHING to do
with being a father. PAYING CHILD SUPPORT is what makes a man a father.
Don't you know that?



  #18  
Old November 9th 06, 04:43 AM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
Bob Whiteside
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 981
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"CasualObserver" wrote in message
ps.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the

father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of
Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very
traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never

seen
him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an

year,
can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason
enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do

no
want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name

change.
Thanks in advance.

Your situation might be different but a lot of fathers dont visit
because they feel that they themselves are the enemy.

Wouldn't their own feelings be their own problem? Why inflict them

on
a
child?

I guess you have to ask why many fathers feel that way. Could it be
that they are
treated like dirt by the system? Maybe they are constantly berated by
the mothers
making them feel like an unwelcome visitors? Isnt it the gentlemen
thing to do is
not visit if you are not welcome? And still pay.

There's nothing gentlemanly about walking away from your children.



Tell that to the fathers who weren't gentlemen and now have restraining
orders. And btw, what does being an occasional visitor have to do with
being a father?


Gosh, Cas, what's the matter with you? A GENTLEMAN visits his child "when
ordered" (by the court or by mommy.) Visiting the child has NOTHING to

do
with being a father. PAYING CHILD SUPPORT is what makes a man a father.
Don't you know that?


It's all about women wanting to control men's behavior - One father is a bad
father because he visits the child but doesn't pay CS. The next father is
a bad father because he pays but doesn't visit the child. Some fathers are
considered bad fathers regardless of what they do. Why do some women feel
so qualified to define what good fathering means?

The OP has her own issues and I'm somewhat surprised no one has confronted
her yet. Why is she so concerned about the child's last name when she is
the one who provided the input for the name on the child's birth
certificate? Does she have a different last name from the child? Was she
ever married to the child's father and changed her name, or was she just
another "single mother" who never bothered to marry the child's father? Is
she trying to avoid her own past and why?


  #19  
Old November 9th 06, 04:51 AM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
Gini
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 936
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


"Bob Whiteside" wrote
..........................

The OP has her own issues and I'm somewhat surprised no one has confronted
her yet. Why is she so concerned about the child's last name when she is
the one who provided the input for the name on the child's birth
certificate? Does she have a different last name from the child? Was she
ever married to the child's father and changed her name, or was she just
another "single mother" who never bothered to marry the child's father?
Is
she trying to avoid her own past and why?

==
Well, I think the mother who was whining about her son going to live with
his dad and laid
all kinds of guilt on the child trumps this one as scoundrel mother of the
year.


  #20  
Old November 9th 06, 06:22 AM posted to alt.child-support,alt.support.divorce
CasualObserver
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 38
Default Name change because parent not visiting child


teachrmama wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
ps.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

Moon Shyne wrote:
"CasualObserver" wrote in message
oups.com...

wrote:
I have the sole physical custody of my minor child with the father
having the usual visitaion rights. I am a citizen of state of
Georgia.
The father does provide child support. But he refuses to have any
relationship with his son. In these circumstances, it is very
traumatic
for my child to bear his father's last name when he has never seen
him.
Can I change his last name to my last name without the father's
approval. Since the father hasn't visited my child in over an year,
can
this be considered abandonment. And can abandonment be a reason
enough
for me to file for name change of my son. At the same time I do no
want
to lose child support. Please suggest avenues for his name change.
Thanks in advance.

Your situation might be different but a lot of fathers dont visit
because they feel that they themselves are the enemy.

Wouldn't their own feelings be their own problem? Why inflict them on
a
child?

I guess you have to ask why many fathers feel that way. Could it be
that they are
treated like dirt by the system? Maybe they are constantly berated by
the mothers
making them feel like an unwelcome visitors? Isnt it the gentlemen
thing to do is
not visit if you are not welcome? And still pay.

There's nothing gentlemanly about walking away from your children.



Tell that to the fathers who weren't gentlemen and now have restraining
orders. And btw, what does being an occasional visitor have to do with
being a father?


Gosh, Cas, what's the matter with you? A GENTLEMAN visits his child "when
ordered" (by the court or by mommy.) Visiting the child has NOTHING to do
with being a father. PAYING CHILD SUPPORT is what makes a man a father.
Don't you know that?


I do know and must say that I've been a model payer for many years now
and hope to achieve the NCP of the year award sometime.

 




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