new: I need help with a question

Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first, before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or
advice.
Thanks
Angel

"Angel" wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or

Your new husband should never have put you in this position.

Papa

"Angel" wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or

Your new husband should never have put you in this position.

Papa

"Angel" wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or

Your new husband should never have put you in this position.

Papa

I am sorry papa but he is an over the road driver and he couldn't be here in
the middle of the week and they don't schedule these on Fridays or Mondays.
He is very sorry too. I love my husband very much and I am trying to do
good thing to help the both of us. He is not proud of letting his CS get out
of hand. But now he is dealing with it. And I am trying to help. I guess
it maybe would of helped if she hadn't got pregnant. They were married for a
couple of years and were headed for divorce when she became pregnant for the
first child. He made it clear when they got married he didn't want kids to
which she agreed. Then two years after the first along came the second.
Angel
"PapaPolarBear" wrote in message
news

"Angel" wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to
what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay
for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion
or

Your new husband should never have put you in this position.

Papa

I am sorry papa but he is an over the road driver and he couldn't be here in
the middle of the week and they don't schedule these on Fridays or Mondays.
He is very sorry too. I love my husband very much and I am trying to do
good thing to help the both of us. He is not proud of letting his CS get out
of hand. But now he is dealing with it. And I am trying to help. I guess
it maybe would of helped if she hadn't got pregnant. They were married for a
couple of years and were headed for divorce when she became pregnant for the
first child. He made it clear when they got married he didn't want kids to
which she agreed. Then two years after the first along came the second.
Angel
"PapaPolarBear" wrote in message
news

"Angel" wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to
what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay
for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion
or

Your new husband should never have put you in this position.

Papa

I am sorry papa but he is an over the road driver and he couldn't be here in
the middle of the week and they don't schedule these on Fridays or Mondays.
He is very sorry too. I love my husband very much and I am trying to do
good thing to help the both of us. He is not proud of letting his CS get out
of hand. But now he is dealing with it. And I am trying to help. I guess
it maybe would of helped if she hadn't got pregnant. They were married for a
couple of years and were headed for divorce when she became pregnant for the
first child. He made it clear when they got married he didn't want kids to
which she agreed. Then two years after the first along came the second.
Angel
"PapaPolarBear" wrote in message
news

"Angel" wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to
what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay
for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion
or

Your new husband should never have put you in this position.

Papa

Ah welcome to the world of CS. As a second spouse you do come second. Your
ex is required to pay his court ordered CS based on his income. That some
of his income supports you, is irrelevent for determining his CS obligation.
Her statement that her new husband pays nothing towards raising the children
is also irrelevent when determining his CS obligation, as is your income,
and the expensive cars and designer clothes. Further your medical expenses
are secondary when it comes to his CS payment. IOW, he can pay your medical
expenses, but can not use the fact of paying your medical expenses as a
reason not to pay his CS obligation.

The only factors you mention that are relevent to determining his CS
obligation a 1) the oldest child turning 18, and 2) the ex not working.
Depending on what the CS order says, he may not be obligated for CS for the
18 year-old, although many recent CS orders require CS for the 18 year old
if the 18 year old is enrolled in a post-secondary education program (i.e.
college, trade school, etc.) While the ex's unemployment is a factor, my
experience is that it will have little effect on what he pays, because the
state will impute an income for her (i.e. decide what she could earn if she
worked and assume that she earns that amount), or her income may not be used
is the state formula for determining CS. If the state with jurisdiction
uses the income shares formula, it is almost certain that the state will
impute her an income, because that can result in a greater CS obligation for
him. This is a result of the assumption that the amount spent on the
children is directly proportional to the combined income of the parents.

My advice is to you is to stay out of the situation to the extent you are
able and learn to accept the fact that when it comes to CS, you and he (and
any children you and he may have) are secondary when it come to the ex and
her children. One more thing, she, the ex, can say anything she wants, but
it is only what the court orders that has any force.


Angel wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or
advice.
Thanks
Angel

Ah welcome to the world of CS. As a second spouse you do come second. Your
ex is required to pay his court ordered CS based on his income. That some
of his income supports you, is irrelevent for determining his CS obligation.
Her statement that her new husband pays nothing towards raising the children
is also irrelevent when determining his CS obligation, as is your income,
and the expensive cars and designer clothes. Further your medical expenses
are secondary when it comes to his CS payment. IOW, he can pay your medical
expenses, but can not use the fact of paying your medical expenses as a
reason not to pay his CS obligation.

The only factors you mention that are relevent to determining his CS
obligation a 1) the oldest child turning 18, and 2) the ex not working.
Depending on what the CS order says, he may not be obligated for CS for the
18 year-old, although many recent CS orders require CS for the 18 year old
if the 18 year old is enrolled in a post-secondary education program (i.e.
college, trade school, etc.) While the ex's unemployment is a factor, my
experience is that it will have little effect on what he pays, because the
state will impute an income for her (i.e. decide what she could earn if she
worked and assume that she earns that amount), or her income may not be used
is the state formula for determining CS. If the state with jurisdiction
uses the income shares formula, it is almost certain that the state will
impute her an income, because that can result in a greater CS obligation for
him. This is a result of the assumption that the amount spent on the
children is directly proportional to the combined income of the parents.

My advice is to you is to stay out of the situation to the extent you are
able and learn to accept the fact that when it comes to CS, you and he (and
any children you and he may have) are secondary when it come to the ex and
her children. One more thing, she, the ex, can say anything she wants, but
it is only what the court orders that has any force.


Angel wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or
advice.
Thanks
Angel

Ah welcome to the world of CS. As a second spouse you do come second. Your
ex is required to pay his court ordered CS based on his income. That some
of his income supports you, is irrelevent for determining his CS obligation.
Her statement that her new husband pays nothing towards raising the children
is also irrelevent when determining his CS obligation, as is your income,
and the expensive cars and designer clothes. Further your medical expenses
are secondary when it comes to his CS payment. IOW, he can pay your medical
expenses, but can not use the fact of paying your medical expenses as a
reason not to pay his CS obligation.

The only factors you mention that are relevent to determining his CS
obligation a 1) the oldest child turning 18, and 2) the ex not working.
Depending on what the CS order says, he may not be obligated for CS for the
18 year-old, although many recent CS orders require CS for the 18 year old
if the 18 year old is enrolled in a post-secondary education program (i.e.
college, trade school, etc.) While the ex's unemployment is a factor, my
experience is that it will have little effect on what he pays, because the
state will impute an income for her (i.e. decide what she could earn if she
worked and assume that she earns that amount), or her income may not be used
is the state formula for determining CS. If the state with jurisdiction
uses the income shares formula, it is almost certain that the state will
impute her an income, because that can result in a greater CS obligation for
him. This is a result of the assumption that the amount spent on the
children is directly proportional to the combined income of the parents.

My advice is to you is to stay out of the situation to the extent you are
able and learn to accept the fact that when it comes to CS, you and he (and
any children you and he may have) are secondary when it come to the ex and
her children. One more thing, she, the ex, can say anything she wants, but
it is only what the court orders that has any force.


Angel wrote in message
...
Hello,
I just came from a "mistake of fact hearing". I stood in for my new
husband.
And I got to met the ex. They way I had things figured was way off from
what there (CS & ex's) figures are. But when I spoke up and said
something
she (ex) laughed at me. As it turns out the state is right, so as to what
there figures say. The ex belittled me right in front of the woman that
was
conducting the investigation. She said that her children come first,
before
the new wife. We also, have a modification coming up because the oldest
child is now 18 and graduated from school. The ex proceeded to tell me
that
she will fight the modification, and that here new husband doesn't
contribute to raising the children...But these children have expensive
cars
to drive and all the designer clothes that are on the market and the ex
doesn't work. The ex also, told me that my husband has no right to pay for
my medical expenses or medicine when her children are to come first. I
broke down into tears after she left. I don't know which way to go as I
am
new to all of this CS stuff. Can some on please give me some suggestion or
advice.
Thanks
Angel