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#1
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Little One HATES the car seat!
My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4
weeks old, he has hated the car seat! He screams like we're doing something terrible to him, goes as stiff as a board when we try to put him in it and sobs for about 15 minutes after we take him out. It is horrible! I hate to hear him scream like that, but I have to be able to go out with him in the car! Does anyone have any advice for how to make this less of a trial for him? I don't want him to grow up hating to be in the car, or thinking that we don't care because we keep putting him in there. Alicia |
#2
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Little One HATES the car seat!
Alicia wrote:
My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4 weeks old, he has hated the car seat! He screams like we're doing something terrible to him, goes as stiff as a board when we try to put him in it and sobs for about 15 minutes after we take him out. It is horrible! I hate to hear him scream like that, but I have to be able to go out with him in the car! Does anyone have any advice for how to make this less of a trial for him? I don't want him to grow up hating to be in the car, or thinking that we don't care because we keep putting him in there. I'm wondering if the semi-sitting position that you take in a car seat is uncomfortable for him. Maybe because of gas? Talk it over with your pediatrician. At any rate, it's something he will grow out of -- unless he realizes he can get a rise out of you by doing it, in which case it will continue. In other words, don't react to his unwanted behavior, just treat it very matter-of-factly. Also, recheck to make sure there isn't something poking him. I think it's important to remember, also, that screaming and crying are how babies that age communicate. I well remember DD at 3 - 6 months during what the BH and I darkly called the arsenic hours screaming from about 4-6 PM. After a long day, I figure it was her way of unwinding. Easy to say, very hard to live through. It got better. And who really knows what she was crying about. Try not to take it personally Scott DD 10 and DS 7.5 |
#3
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Little One HATES the car seat!
On Wed, 29 Oct 2003 11:37:06 EST, Alicia wrote:
My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4 weeks old, he has hated the car seat! He screams like we're doing something terrible to him, goes as stiff as a board when we try to put him in it and sobs for about 15 minutes after we take him out. It is horrible! I hate to hear him scream like that, but I have to be able to go out with him in the car! Does anyone have any advice for how to make this less of a trial for him? I don't want him to grow up hating to be in the car, or thinking that we don't care because we keep putting him in there. No experience at all - just some wild guesses. I'm assuming you've already felt around with your hands and face to see whether there's anything sharp or lumpy or scratchy in the seat or its straps. Is it brand new? Does it smell like new plastic (emit solvent fumes)? (Washing it or putting it out in the sun might help that.) Is there any sign that it irritates his skin? Do you put your son in any other type of rigid or semi-rigid carrier that he's comfortable in? Is the carseat fixed to the car, or is it the kind where you can buckle him in first and then carry the seat top to the base? Have you asked his doctor about it? Louise |
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Little One HATES the car seat!
Alicia writes:
My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4 weeks old, he has hated the car seat! I don't know anyone who has had this problem, but I found a long list of comments on the web, from people who did. Maybe some of these comments will be useful to you: http://parents.berkeley.edu/recommen...ats/hates.html Scott Lindstrom writes: At any rate, it's something he will grow out of -- unless he realizes he can get a rise out of you by doing it, in which case it will continue. In other words, don't react to his unwanted behavior, just treat it very matter-of-factly. I couldn't disagree more with this theory of child development. 12 week old children don't cry in order to "get a rise" out of their parents. Infants aren't going to cry any more or less if you treat them coldly. David desJardins |
#5
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Little One HATES the car seat!
David desJardins wrote:
Alicia writes: My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4 weeks old, he has hated the car seat! I don't know anyone who has had this problem, but I found a long list of comments on the web, from people who did. Maybe some of these comments will be useful to you: http://parents.berkeley.edu/recommen...ats/hates.html Scott Lindstrom writes: At any rate, it's something he will grow out of -- unless he realizes he can get a rise out of you by doing it, in which case it will continue. In other words, don't react to his unwanted behavior, just treat it very matter-of-factly. I couldn't disagree more with this theory of child development. 12 week old children don't cry in order to "get a rise" out of their parents. Infants aren't going to cry any more or less if you treat them coldly. Maybe. But if a parent starts behaving such that they react with alarm to everything a child does at age 0-3 months, how easy is it for that parent to change his/her behavior as a child does start to become aware how to yank the parents' strings? [And why do you interpret matter-of-fact treatment to be cold?] Scott DD 10 and DS 7.5 |
#6
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Little One HATES the car seat!
He's not the only baby who hates the car seat if it helps.
Unfortunately, it seems that some babies are more or less comfortable in their seats than other. Both of my girls were content in theirs, but our baby boy has not been. We are sure that a significant hernia that was not repaired until 9 months contributed. That is resolved now and he still does not enjoy his carseat for very long periods of time. We have him facing his sisters in our van, which has helped. We are hopeful, but realistic, that turning his seat around in the next few months will help. As another poster said, try not to take it personally. Unless you can find some "cause" for his discomfort, he may just fuss more in the car than other babies. He may react to your concern if you spend a great deal of time and energy worrying about it. You might try getting a toy mobile and installing sun shields. Karen G |
#7
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Little One HATES the car seat!
Scott Lindstrom writes:
Maybe. But if a parent starts behaving such that they react with alarm to everything a child does at age 0-3 months Reacting and responding to a child who is angry at being forced into a carseat, and who cries for long periods during and after every such occasion, is not remotely the same as "reacting with alarm to everything a child does." [And why do you interpret matter-of-fact treatment to be cold?] Because that's what the dictionary says. cold n. .... 2 a : marked by a lack of the warmth of normal human emotion, friendliness, or compassion got a cold reception; also : not moved to enthusiasm the movie leaves me cold b : not colored or affected by personal feeling or bias : DETACHED, INDIFFERENT cold chronicles recorded by an outsider -- Andrew Sarris; also : IMPERSONAL, OBJECTIVE cold facts cold reality David desJardins |
#8
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Little One HATES the car seat!
Alicia wrote in message news:2RRnb.215974$9l5.50262@pd7tw2no...
My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4 weeks old, he has hated the car seat! He screams like we're doing something terrible to him, goes as stiff as a board when we try to put him in it and sobs for about 15 minutes after we take him out. It is horrible! I hate to hear him scream like that, but I have to be able to go out with him in the car! Does anyone have any advice for how to make this less of a trial for him? I don't want him to grow up hating to be in the car, or thinking that we don't care because we keep putting him in there. Alas, I know what you mean. And the icing on the cake is that everyone thinks you're making it up because "babies love car rides"! My son's reaction was a little less extreme than yours, as we could sometimes get him to tolerate short rides, but generally car rides were exercises in torture for all involved. We never found a solution per se, just limited car rides as much as we could and just gritted our teeth when we had to go somewhere more than 15 minutes away and listened to the howls, feeling terrible. He's fourteen months old now, and he's much, much better about it if it gives you any comfort. He started to improve when we were able to turn the seat around, and he's also just gotten old enough for him to be able to daydream, I guess. Just trying to reassure you that there may be hope. One thing you might check into: a child of my acquaintance was a terrible car rider, and when she got old enough to talk, it turned out that she was very sensitive to motion sickness and was probably howling because her stomach was bothering her. I don't know what can be done about this possibility, but you might ask your doctor. Beth |
#9
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Little One HATES the car seat!
Karen G ) wrote:
: He's not the only baby who hates the car seat if it helps. : Unfortunately, it seems that some babies are more or less comfortable in : their seats than other. Both of my girls were content in theirs, but : As another poster said, try not to take it personally. Unless you can Here's another me too post. My daugher, now 12, was very unhappy in the car seat as a newborn. When she was 5 weeks old we decided to take a 7 hour car trip to see my husband's dying grandmother. It was one of the most miserable times I've ever had in a car. We started out stopping frequently and finally decided to tough it out for longer stretches as the frequent stops prolonged the agony for all of us. When she was somewhat older we realized that she was feeling carsick/nauseous in the car and I suspect that may have been why she was so miserable as an infant. Fortunately the carsickness appears to have lessened as she gets older. It is difficult and we reduced our numbers of car trips while she was very young. When she reached 4-6 (?) months we found that we were more able to interact with her and distract her which made the trips easier. Good luck, Jody |
#10
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Little One HATES the car seat!
In article 2RRnb.215974$9l5.50262@pd7tw2no,
Alicia wrote: My beautiful baby boy is now almost 12 weeks old, and since he was about 4 weeks old, he has hated the car seat! He screams like we're doing something terrible to him, goes as stiff as a board when we try to put him in it and sobs for about 15 minutes after we take him out. It is horrible! I hate to hear him scream like that, but I have to be able to go out with him in the car! Does anyone have any advice for how to make this less of a trial for him? I don't want him to grow up hating to be in the car, or thinking that we don't care because we keep putting him in there. Alicia Ours despised riding backwards. In light of her subsequent personality development, we think it might have been because she didn't have anything to look at. She yelled at the top of her lungs most of the way home from the hospital, until we hit a stretch of bumpy road the last few miles that somehow lulled her to sleep. Anyway we used to be able to distract her by singing, which would put off the crying for maybe ten minutes. Around here, that's enough time to get a lot of places. We obtained a tape of lullabies when she was about four months old, which helped sometimes. We also hung some chewable keys and other toys from the handle of the seat, which sometimes kept her occupied. Otherwise, we just let her cry herself to sleep. Once she was old enough to ride frontwards, things got much better. Hope it gets better soon! If it's any comfort, what our daughter was like the first three months was a very shaky predictor of what she later turned out to be (a pretty good car rider, for one thing). |
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