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Gag of the Week....



 
 
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  #1  
Old May 22nd 06, 04:11 PM posted to alt.support.single-parents
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Default Gag of the Week....

Did you hear about the Montana teacher who was helping one of her
kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots? He asked for help & she could
see why. Even with her pulling & him pushing, the little boots still didn't
want to go on. Finally, when the 2nd boot was on, she had worked up a sweat.

She almost cried when the little boy said, "Teacher, they're on the wrong
feet." She looked & sure enough, they were. It wasn't any easier pulling the
boots off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as
together they worked to get the boots back on, this time on the right feet.

He then announced, "These aren't my boots."

She bit her tongue rather than get right in his face & scream, "Why didn't
you say so?" like she wanted to. And, once again she struggled to help him
pull the ill-fitting boots off his little feet. No sooner they got the boots
off & he said,
"They're my brother's boots My Mom made me wear 'em."

Now she didn't know if she should laugh or cry. But, she mustered up the
grace & courage she had left to wrestle the boots on his feet again.

Helping him into his coat, she asked, "Now, where are your mittens?"

He said, "I stuffed 'em in the toes of my boots."

Her trial starts next month.........


  #2  
Old June 12th 06, 06:52 PM posted to alt.support.single-parents
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Default Gag of the Week....

A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a redhead
with three small children running around at her feet.

He said, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the
product?"

She said, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time."

"And if you don't mind me asking, what do you use it for?"

"We use it for sex."

The researcher was a little taken aback.

He said, "Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child's
bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge. But, in fact, I know that most
people do use it for sex. I admire you for your honesty. Since you've been
frank so far, can you tell me exactly how you use it for sex?"

The redhead said, "I don't mind telling you at all. My husband and I put it
on the door knob and it keeps the kids out."



 




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