Canadian question regarding custody

Hi.

I am the stepmother of a 6 year old girl. My husband and I are
non-custodial but very involved in her upbringing. Stepdaughter, her
mother, and mother's boyfriend just moved to another city and enrolled SD in
a new school. My question is about emergency contacts. Who has the legal
right to approve emergency treatment of my SD? I know my husband and her
mother do, but do I?

With the mother's boyfriend, she goes around calling the boyfriend SD's
stepdad and saying they have a common law marriage - but the boyfriend is
still married to someone else so I don't think that's legally possible. So
if he's just her boyfriend and not a common-law husband/stepdad, can he
approve emergency treatment of my SD?

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for emergencies
so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

TIA,

Teri

"Teri" wrote in message
...
Hi.

I am the stepmother of a 6 year old girl. My husband and I are
non-custodial but very involved in her upbringing. Stepdaughter, her
mother, and mother's boyfriend just moved to another city and enrolled SD
in a new school. My question is about emergency contacts. Who has the
legal right to approve emergency treatment of my SD? I know my husband
and her mother do, but do I?

With the mother's boyfriend, she goes around calling the boyfriend SD's
stepdad and saying they have a common law marriage - but the boyfriend is
still married to someone else so I don't think that's legally possible.
So if he's just her boyfriend and not a common-law husband/stepdad, can he
approve emergency treatment of my SD?

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

1) In the divorce documents who has guardianship rights? The Mother or is it
equally shared? Custody and Guardianship are two separate issues and should
be spelled out in the divorce.

2) Even marriage (or common law marriage) to a CP does not give the new
parent any automatic guardianship rights. If your spouse's ex is the child's
only guardian she may have the right and the power to register her partner
as a guardian without your spouses permission.

In my case I have/had 50/50 custody and guardianship of my two boys (only
one is now a minor) and (as I had to point out to my ex) her husband can not
make life or death decisions for our children now or ever, as I will never
give him the right! She had put her husband down as the secondary contact at
the school and I had it changed to me.

John

"Teri" wrote in message
...
concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

Does he have a power of attorney?

Jess

In my case, in the US, I had the right to be secondary contact on all the
school papers, but they erased all traces of me and my information anyway.
I had to go in to the school with my papers.
With hope and heart,
Kathleen
--
He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn,
or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other.
~ C.S.Lewis

Hi.

I am the stepmother of a 6 year old girl. My husband and I are
non-custodial but very involved in her upbringing. Stepdaughter, her
mother, and mother's boyfriend just moved to another city and enrolled
SD
in a new school. My question is about emergency contacts. Who has the
legal right to approve emergency treatment of my SD? I know my husband
and her mother do, but do I?

With the mother's boyfriend, she goes around calling the boyfriend SD's
stepdad and saying they have a common law marriage - but the boyfriend
is
still married to someone else so I don't think that's legally possible.
So if he's just her boyfriend and not a common-law husband/stepdad, can
he
approve emergency treatment of my SD?

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

1) In the divorce documents who has guardianship rights? The Mother or is
it
equally shared? Custody and Guardianship are two separate issues and
should
be spelled out in the divorce.

2) Even marriage (or common law marriage) to a CP does not give the new
parent any automatic guardianship rights. If your spouse's ex is the
child's
only guardian she may have the right and the power to register her partner
as a guardian without your spouses permission.

In my case I have/had 50/50 custody and guardianship of my two boys (only

one is now a minor) and (as I had to point out to my ex) her husband can
not
make life or death decisions for our children now or ever, as I will never
give him the right! She had put her husband down as the secondary contact
at
the school and I had it changed to me.

John

"DrLith"wrote
Teri wrote:

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

Let's say the child is in a horrible playground accident and is rushed to
the ER, and needs immediate surgery; they've gotten hold of the boyfriend
but not the mother. (a) is the hospital going to put their legal team on
the case to determine whether this guy is, in fact, a valid common-law
step-parent with legal rights? (b) are they going to hold up the surgery
because he isn't?

If that, indeed, is your concern--that the child will be in some sort of
medical emergency and fail to receive adequate care because there's no
parent/legal guardian available to authorize it--I think it is unfounded.

When I was a single parent, I had my next-door neighbor as the emergency
contact, for god's sake. Most "emergencies" with the schools are things
like "come pick up the child, she's puking in the hallway." As long as the
person is on the list of individuals approved to pick up the child,
they're not going to care WHO it is!
==
Perhaps--but, in the US it is common for parents to give written permission
to anyone
who may be called on to act as parent in an emergency (sitter, daycare,
school). However,
when my son was injured in a fall from a tree, I was out of town and my
husband (his stepdad)
took him to the ER for treatment without a parental release. His bio dad was
about 50 miles
away at the time. It is best to have a written release from a parent but the
hospital is not likely to
withhold needed treatment without it.

Teri wrote:

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for emergencies
so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

Let's say the child is in a horrible playground accident and is rushed
to the ER, and needs immediate surgery; they've gotten hold of the
boyfriend but not the mother. (a) is the hospital going to put their
legal team on the case to determine whether this guy is, in fact, a
valid common-law step-parent with legal rights? (b) are they going to
hold up the surgery because he isn't?

If that, indeed, is your concern--that the child will be in some sort of
medical emergency and fail to receive adequate care because there's no
parent/legal guardian available to authorize it--I think it is unfounded.

When I was a single parent, I had my next-door neighbor as the emergency
contact, for god's sake. Most "emergencies" with the schools are things
like "come pick up the child, she's puking in the hallway." As long as
the person is on the list of individuals approved to pick up the child,
they're not going to care WHO it is!

"DrLith" wrote in message
...
Teri wrote:

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

Let's say the child is in a horrible playground accident and is rushed to
the ER, and needs immediate surgery; they've gotten hold of the boyfriend
but not the mother. (a) is the hospital going to put their legal team on
the case to determine whether this guy is, in fact, a valid common-law
step-parent with legal rights? (b) are they going to hold up the surgery
because he isn't?

If that, indeed, is your concern--that the child will be in some sort of
medical emergency and fail to receive adequate care because there's no
parent/legal guardian available to authorize it--I think it is unfounded.

When I was a single parent, I had my next-door neighbor as the emergency
contact, for god's sake. Most "emergencies" with the schools are things
like "come pick up the child, she's puking in the hallway." As long as the
person is on the list of individuals approved to pick up the child,
they're not going to care WHO it is!

I don't know how it works in the US, but here in canuckland a
hospital/doctor (through child welfare) will make the decision in the
absence of a guardian, but I would not mind my ex's husband reinforcing a
good decision if he were the only one present.

John

Hi John!

Long time no see!

Isn't it coming up to your first anniversay to yor new wife?????

On Fri, 23 Mar 2007 00:22:04 GMT, "Slightly Graying Wolf"
wrote:


"Teri" wrote in message
...
Hi.

I am the stepmother of a 6 year old girl. My husband and I are
non-custodial but very involved in her upbringing. Stepdaughter, her
mother, and mother's boyfriend just moved to another city and enrolled SD
in a new school. My question is about emergency contacts. Who has the
legal right to approve emergency treatment of my SD? I know my husband
and her mother do, but do I?

With the mother's boyfriend, she goes around calling the boyfriend SD's
stepdad and saying they have a common law marriage - but the boyfriend is
still married to someone else so I don't think that's legally possible.
So if he's just her boyfriend and not a common-law husband/stepdad, can he
approve emergency treatment of my SD?

I'm concerned that SD's mother might have just listed herself and her
boyfriend as emergency contacts at the school, so I'm concerned that the
boyfriend even if reached wouldn't be able to give approval for
emergencies so he wouldn't be a reasonable alternate for SD's mother.

1) In the divorce documents who has guardianship rights? The Mother or is it
equally shared? Custody and Guardianship are two separate issues and should
be spelled out in the divorce.

2) Even marriage (or common law marriage) to a CP does not give the new
parent any automatic guardianship rights. If your spouse's ex is the child's
only guardian she may have the right and the power to register her partner
as a guardian without your spouses permission.

In my case I have/had 50/50 custody and guardianship of my two boys (only
one is now a minor) and (as I had to point out to my ex) her husband can not
make life or death decisions for our children now or ever, as I will never
give him the right! She had put her husband down as the secondary contact at
the school and I had it changed to me.

John

"Slightly Graying Wolf" wrote in
message news:M4FMh.52180$DN.13484@pd7urf2no...

1) In the divorce documents who has guardianship rights? The Mother or is
it equally shared? Custody and Guardianship are two separate issues and
should be spelled out in the divorce.

John, I believe in Canada that guardianship and custody are one and the
same - unless a difference is specifically documented. DH and BM (birth
mother) have 50/50 custody/guardianship of SD.

Teri

"Kathleen" wrote in message
...
In my case, in the US, I had the right to be secondary contact on all the
school papers, but they erased all traces of me and my information anyway.
I had to go in to the school with my papers.
With hope and heart,
Kathleen

I have a fear of that happening, Kathleen. I had a really good relationship
last year with SD's teacher - up until the teacher's conference. We met
with the teacher first, BM met with him the next day. The last time I tried
contacting him he wouldn't even answer my email. I've let it go though,
since SD has now moved to another school.

Teri