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#1
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Help! Toddler left in car question
I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a
rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first. Thanks. -- nimue "If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon "There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete bitches." Dawn French |
#2
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"nimue" wrote in message ... daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first. Thanks. I have children and I do not leave my kids in the car for more than a minute out of my sight. There's a law against that here, thank goodness, and it states exactly that. We can't leave our kids in the car alone out of our sight for more than a minute, so I only do it long enough to walk literally a few feet from the driveway to the door of the dcp and step in to sign one child in or out. It only take a few seconds, but I lock the vehicle door and I put the emergency brake on. I've had GP's on both sides and friends suggest I leave on or both kids in the car on different occasions, but that's not me. I have a fear that something terrible might happen and then I couldn't forgive myself for not following my heart. |
#3
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Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then that
even) It takes 9 months to create a brother or sister. (and does not replace the child stolen) It takes many many many years, (even decades) getting over the fact you have no idea where your child is, Or what happened to your child, or who ever took your child. Never ever do I leave a kid in a car. It would never happen to me. I have heard to many cases of it happening. In fact was one here recently where baby was dumped and it was lucky a passer by found it otherwise it would have died. Its againest the law in this state im living in, and also to you just dont know who is really watching or following you. I would suggest that she should be more careful. Maybe find out how many cases have happened in the last year ? Or you could be more forceful next time and if she refuses, you could then shock her, (by being mean) and get another friend of yours to take baby whilst she is inside looking at the houses. When she comes out, I bet you one dollar she will panic and lose it !. (Unless of couse she doesn't really care about the baby and is only using in a tug of war between her and her ex) BB I know off topic but look at "I know my name is steven" or "the beaumont children" both unlucky and in the wrong spot at the wrong time. "nimue" wrote in message ... I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first. Thanks. -- nimue "If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon "There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete bitches." Dawn French |
#4
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Billy bob wrote:
Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then that even) It takes 9 months to create a brother or sister. (and does not replace the child stolen) It takes many many many years, (even decades) getting over the fact you have no idea where your child is, Or what happened to your child, or who ever took your child. Never ever do I leave a kid in a car. It would never happen to me. I have heard to many cases of it happening. In fact was one here recently where baby was dumped and it was lucky a passer by found it otherwise it would have died. Its againest the law in this state im living in, What state is that? This happened in Arizona and I live in New York. and also to you just dont know who is really watching or following you. I would suggest that she should be more careful. Maybe find out how many cases have happened in the last year ? Or you could be more forceful next time and if she refuses, you could then shock her, (by being mean) and get another friend of yours to take baby whilst she is inside looking at the houses. No, no, I could never do that. When she comes out, I bet you one dollar she will panic and lose it !. (Unless of couse she doesn't really care about the baby and is only using in a tug of war between her and her ex) Uh, creepy -- I didn't mention that she is divorced -- how did you know? I think she does love her baby -- I just think she is UNBELIEVABLY naive -- she just assumes everything will be okay and constantly has these little messes in her life that come from not making sure things are as they should be. BB I know off topic but look at "I know my name is steven" or "the beaumont children" both unlucky and in the wrong spot at the wrong time. "nimue" wrote in message ... I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first. Thanks. -- nimue "If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon "There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete bitches." Dawn French -- nimue "If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon "There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete bitches." Dawn French |
#5
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On Sun, 27 Feb 2005 23:52:16 GMT, "nimue"
scribbled: I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first. Thanks. Well, I think the most you can do is to voice your concern to her. You could call your local PD and ask if there is a law against it, and cite that if there is. If you're present when she decides to leave the child in the car, you can refuse to accompany her and tell her you'll wait with the child until she returns... give her the idea that you feel it's serious business. Fwiw, I never leave either of my children in the car for any length of time. If I have the infant when dropping the preschooler off at school, I carry the baby in with me. I have opened our front door and took my purse in while the baby is in the car, but it's parked less than 5 feet from my front door. Nan |
#6
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I would definitely talk to her about it. It's illegal in many
states--considered child endangerment or child neglect. She may be unaware of how serious it is, but if she's reported, the consequences could be severe. If she left the child in the car to check on a rental property, (doesn't seem like an emergency reason) then she likely leaves her in the car at other times. It's very worth the conversation, no matter how uncomfortable. k. |
#7
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nimue wrote: I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? Am I just being paranoid? I would like to hear from some parents on this. As for the neighborhood -- it's ok. It's not great and not terrible -- just ok. Lord, I can tell you all that I am concerned about my friendship with this woman right now because I feel as if I should mention this again way more forcibly, but I would like some advice first. Thanks. -- nimue "If I had created reality television I would have had a much greater influence, but then I would have had to KILL MYSELF." Joss Whedon "There are two types of women -- those who like chocolate and complete bitches." Dawn French Whoa. I would talk to her about it. We don't own a car and only drive when visiting family, but if ds falls asleep in the car at naptime and we don't want to wake him, one of us will stay with him till he wakes up (we'll either catch a few zzzs or read a book/magazine). We've often timed long drives to coincide with a nap and had him still be sleeping upon arrival. Out in the country (I mean, really in the country, not in a small town) I wouldn't worry about him being abducted, but I worry about him being safe/comfortable (esp. with regard to temperature issues), and I don't want him to wake up strapped into a carseat and all alone. If you are out with more than one adult and you really don't want to wake the child, someone might stay with her. Or you could postpone whatever you need to do and drive around, park in the shade with a drink and just chat, or something. Melania Mom to Joffre (Jan 11, 2003) and #2 (edd May 21, 2005) |
#8
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"nimue" wrote in message
... I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were all down (this thanks to me -- my friend thought you could leave the windows up on a 70 degree day in Tucson! This is the kind of thing that worries me about my friend.). We were in the house about 15-20 minutes. She never went to check on the toddler and we could not see the car from the house unless we were in the front room. We went all over the house and the back yard. My husband went to check on the toddler during this time. My friend did not know he did it. I felt VERY uncomfortable about the fact that my friend left her kid in the car unattended and I mentioned it to her. She dismissed my concerns, saying that it was a safe neighborhood and one she was familiar with. She also said that she didn't like to wake up her daughter from her nap because she was so tired. I do not have children. I know that I would NEVER leave my baby (if I had one) alone in a car, but maybe I am just paranoid -- maybe, since I don't have kids, I just don't understand. What should I do? Should I mention it again, more forcefully this time? I don't think it's necessary to be confrontational. If you were in the exact same situation (away from the car from 15 minutes), then I'd just say, "You go ahead and check the property. I prefer to wait outside, as I'm uncomfortable in leaving a child alone in an open car for so long." Cite news stories or something, if needed, to explain your In such a case, you aren't telling what the other parent to do, but you are accomplishing the necessary task (keeping an eye on the child) yourself. So all is well. And the parent doesn't need a lecture anyway, as that's usually a waste of time. Adults, like their kids, learn better by example. As for the other posts, I agree with the one minute standard as making sense. I wouldn't wake a child to run inside the bakery to grab a loaf of bread, or go up to the counter to pay for my gas. In both cases, I can see the car pretty much at all times. P. Tierney |
#9
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In ,
nimue wrote: *I was recently in Tucson with a friend of mine and we went to check on a *rental property she owns. Her 2 year old was in the car seat, napping, and *my friend left her there when we went to check the house. The windows were http://www.azcapa.org/capa/pressmain4.html - this explains some reasons why it is stupid to leave kids in the car alone http://nrc.uchsc.edu/STATES/AZ/az_3.htm - this one states that it is illegal for a family care provider to leave a child unattended in a vehicle i can't find any site containing any rules regarding parents leaving their own kids in the car specifically, but I imagine this would fall into the child endangerment statutes... -- Hillary Israeli, VMD Lafayette Hill/PA/USA/Earth "Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it is too dark to read." --Groucho Marx |
#10
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"Billy bob" billybob@bobshome wrote in message u... Its takes one minute for someone to take your child. (yup less then that even) I think there are a lot of situations reported where the child was unintentionally taken by a car thief. You know, the child was in the back seat and the thief didn't know it. |
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