Chose the baby's god mother. Now what?

What exactly do I need to do? I've never done this before.


~Carol Ann
EDD March 31/April 1

On Wed, 29 Oct 2003 20:11:30 GMT, "Carol Ann"
wrote:

What exactly do I need to do? I've never done this before.

Well, it will largely depend on if this is a religious or a symbolic
role. If it is religious, your church may have requirements that have
to be met. If it is symbolic, it can be anyone.

My children will not have godparents. My sister did give godparents
to her children, but it was a symbolic role. I think for all 3 she
chose her best friend (but I could be wrong).

Good luck with your decision!

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan
"Boy" EDD 11 Jan 2004
See Jayan: http://jayan.topcities.com/

We do not have a god mother for Izabella. When we had her baptised we were
asked if we were going to have god parents. The rev. than told us not alot
of people do this anymore. Plus its not legal unless they are listed in
your wills.
We did ask DHs sister to be a god mother though but she did not seem keen on
it for some reason.

--
Laura
Mommy to Izabella **Feb 10th, 2003**
And 2 felines *Ashes(3) & George (5)*
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/i/izabellawelburn/

"Carol Ann" wrote in message
link.net...
What exactly do I need to do? I've never done this before.


~Carol Ann
EDD March 31/April 1

On Wed, 29 Oct 2003 20:33:48 GMT, "Rob and Laura"
wrote:

We did ask DHs sister to be a god mother though but she did not seem keen on
it for some reason.

If they are not the same religion as you (or don't hold your beliefs),
they may feel uncomfortable because they think they will have to teach
the child about God. (That is the traditional role of a godparent.)

To the OP, I would be very clear what you expect out of the godparent
when you ask them especially if they are to fill a religious role in
the child's life. Being a godparent means different things to
different people.

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan
"Boy" EDD 11 Jan 2004
See Jayan: http://jayan.topcities.com/

"Rob and Laura" wrote
Plus its not legal unless they are listed in
your wills.
We did ask DHs sister to be a god mother though but she did not seem keen
on
it for some reason.

M y husband and I have no idea who to put in our wills....that is a large
responsibility for someone if you mean it seriously and not just
symbolically, for someone to assume responsibility for your child/ren if
something happens to you.

My husband and I first of all don't know anyone that would be as fit and
trustworthy as we would want , but a couple who we could think of we are not
sure if theyd WANT the responsibility.

This is just like anything else- everybod has a different opinion. My
parents think it should be them, my husbands parents think it should be
them, my husband thinks it should be his parents,I personally do not want to
pick grandparents on either side for various reasons including age. Neither
of us wants his brother and sister in law, and his other brother and mine
both are single. Various people our age, freidns, coworkers etc just are not
appealing, I guess I will pass up even having godparents and just make sure
our will is solid. I refuse to have any of the grandparents be in a
godparents role though...what can you do if you DON'T have an ideal
godparent? If something happened would it just be up to whoever to step
forward, such as grandparents? When our baby is 18 the grandparents will be
in upper 70's....

On Wed, 29 Oct 2003 20:11:30 GMT, "Carol Ann"
wrote:

What exactly do I need to do? I've never done this before.


As others have pointed out it depends on why you are doing this.

We thought about this for a while before asking anyone, as we where
asking them to be God Parents in the full religious meaning. Once we
worked out who we wanted we asked them, before doing anything else -
so that they would have a chance to say no.

After that we discussed the details with them and our pastor while
arranging for DD to be baptised.

Di

J wrote:

"Rob and Laura" wrote
Plus its not legal unless they are listed i
your wills.


M y husband and I have no idea who to put in our wills....that is a large
responsibility for someone if you mean it seriously and not just
symbolically, for someone to assume responsibility for your child/ren if
something happens to you.


Deciding on guardians for your children is completely
separate from deciding on godparents (though of course you
might end up choosing the same person, as some do). Why
would someone think it's a problem that godparents aren't
"legal" unless you put them in your will? They're perfectly
fine as godparents regardless of what you do, and you don't
have to put them in your will for them to be able to
exercise their religious obligations (whatever those might
be according to your religion). If you want them to *also*
be guardians of your children, then of course you have to
put that in your will. Out of the eight godparents we
have for our three children, only one is also a guardian
(and she'd get all three kids).


Obviously, some people equate godparents with

guardians, but I don't think this holds water with any
religion I'm familiar with, nor with the law. I don't
see any need whatsoever to refrain from having someone
as a godparent just because you don't want them as
guardians of your child (assuming, of course, that
they meet whatever you consider to be the religious
requirements of the job).

Best wishes,
Ericka

Carol Ann wrote:

What exactly do I need to do? I've never done this before.


It completely depends on the requirements of
your religion and any other requirements you have for
the job. If you're not sure of the religious requirements,
contact your church to get the details. Beyond that,
ask yourself what sort of relationship you'd like your
child to have. I really wanted someone I felt confident
would still be in my child's life years from now. I also
wanted someone who could be another adult my child could
turn to in times of trouble if he or she couldn't or
wouldn't talk to us (so therefore I wanted someone whose
judgement I really trusted).
Once you have some ideas about whom you'd like
to ask, have a discussion with that person explaining
what you're looking for in a godparent and ask if he
or she would be comfortable with that. Ask in a way that
leaves the person a graceful exit if he or she wishes
to decline.
After you've got someone lined up, check with
your church to see if there are any additional requirements,
like classes or rehearsals or whatnot, in addition to
whatever you need to do to get on the schedule.
Personally, I love the opportunity to choose
godparents. I see it as one of those opportunities
to turn friends into family ;-)

Best wishes,
Ericka

Ericka Kammerer wrote in message ...

Obviously, some people equate godparents with
guardians, but I don't think this holds water with any
religion I'm familiar with, nor with the law. I don't
see any need whatsoever to refrain from having someone
as a godparent just because you don't want them as
guardians of your child (assuming, of course, that
they meet whatever you consider to be the religious
requirements of the job).

Not to mention that it might be kind of weird to have your children
split up with different guardians, if you chose different godparents
for your different children (which I believe is somewhat typical, in
my admittedly limited experience!)

(My Presbyterian SIL did ask my dh to be godfather for one niece, and
asked if I would want to be the godmother, but was not at all offended
when I said I would be rather uncomfortable with the role, considering
that I'm Jewish!)

Irene