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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
I don't really have a problem that needs fixing, but I would like to
hear some other people's stories, if they have had similar experiences to mine, just to get a sense of how long my current situation might last. DS2 is 16 months old, and a few months ago completely reverse cycled. I don't mind, because it means I have a great deal of freedom in the daytime. Since we've coslept from birth, don't have a crib, etc, he nurses at night instead. I don't have any idea how many times a night he nurses - sometimes it feels like hardly anything, and sometimes he seems to be latched on the whole night long. I sleep with him is "his bed", which is a single mattress on the floor in our room. I often get him settled, and then go to sleep later in the "big bed", only to move over sometime during the night. I think as long as we're cosleeping, it will be hard to night wean, and I'm hoping to gradually move myself out of his bed. I don't really see it happening for a while, though. My experience with DS1 was of course totally different. Although we coslept, he seemed to be a deeper sleeper, and was only nursing once a night (sometimes not at all) by 8 or 9 months. We moved him out at 13-14 months, which took about two weeks of DH going to him in the night instead of me, before he basically settled. By 18mo, he was only nursing to fall asleep for naps and bedtime, and it was pretty easy to gently transition him to snuggling to sleep instead by 22mo. Now, however, DH is working very long hours in a high-stress job with a lot of responsibility, and can't afford broken sleep. So I'm on my own with DS2, who is generally Mr. Contrary and Independent all day long, and then Mommy's Little Velcro Baby all night long. He has been known to climb on top of me to sleep, when I'm trying to sneak out of the bed, presumably to keep me there! So, if anyone has gone through this, did the kid suddenly become a deeper sleeper and night wean before age 2? Before age 3? Was it child-led, or at least easy, or did you really have to "break" them of it? A few months from now DH will be done this heavy stage of work and might be able to become the nighttime parent for a while, but given the obstinence of this kid, I don't suppose DS2'll give up easily. I just kind of want there to be a light at the end of the tunnel, where I tuck my kids into bed at 7:30 and don't see them again till the morning . . . .I want my evenings and nights back, eventually!! thanks, Melania |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
Melania wrote: I don't really have a problem that needs fixing, but I would like to hear some other people's stories, if they have had similar experiences to mine, just to get a sense of how long my current situation might last. snip So, if anyone has gone through this, did the kid suddenly become a deeper sleeper and night wean before age 2? Before age 3? Was it child-led, or at least easy, or did you really have to "break" them of it? A few months from now DH will be done this heavy stage of work and might be able to become the nighttime parent for a while, but given the obstinence of this kid, I don't suppose DS2'll give up easily. DD1 night weaned much like your DS1, we moved her into her own bed in her own room at 18 months. Around then DH started getting up with her. She weaned completely at 26 months. DD2 is still in our bed (25 months), but very, very soon we are getting bunk beds and she is moving to her sister's room (don't have room in our room for a mattress on the floor, or I'd do that first). That said, she did night nurse a fair bit through her second year. She self night weaned a bit ago, maybe around 20 months? She just stopped waking up (yeah!). I also do give her a sippy cup of milk before bed so she can drink her fill. I think that helps hold her until morning. She now nurses briefly before bed and that is her only nursing session- which she skipped last night. I expect to wean her when we move her out of our room. So, I didn't do anything about it, she just stopped waking up. Don't know why, but I'm not about to compain. Mary W. |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
Mary W. wrote: snip DD1 night weaned much like your DS1, we moved her into her own bed in her own room at 18 months. Around then DH started getting up with her. She weaned completely at 26 months. DD2 is still in our bed (25 months), but very, very soon we are getting bunk beds and she is moving to her sister's room (don't have room in our room for a mattress on the floor, or I'd do that first). That said, she did night nurse a fair bit through her second year. She self night weaned a bit ago, maybe around 20 months? She just stopped waking up (yeah!). I also do give her a sippy cup of milk before bed so she can drink her fill. I think that helps hold her until morning. She now nurses briefly before bed and that is her only nursing session- which she skipped last night. I expect to wean her when we move her out of our room. So, I didn't do anything about it, she just stopped waking up. Don't know why, but I'm not about to compain. Mary W. Yay! That's the sort of thing I like to hear - we are moving in January, when DS2 will be about 20mo. With DS1, I managed to make weaning coincide with moving into a new place, and I'm hoping to do a loft bed over a futon for the boys in the new place, and making the move coincide with The Move. (I've always had good luck slipping in an extra change or transition during a big move). I wouldn't mind nursing DS2 to sleep in his room with his big brother, and then hopefully they will sleep together happily (they are big buddies, so it could work!). Now that you mention it, we did the sippy cup thing with DS1 before bed, and it worked well - always with milk, since he didn't like drinking water. DS2 can't stomach milk, but drinks water, so I think we will have to start bringing a sippy cup of water to bed with us. Thanks! Melania |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
Melania writes:
: I don't really have a problem that needs fixing, but I would like to : hear some other people's stories, if they have had similar experiences : to mine, just to get a sense of how long my current situation might : last. Until your kids leave home... :-) : DS2 is 16 months old, and a few months ago completely reverse cycled. I : don't mind, because it means I have a great deal of freedom in the : daytime. Since we've coslept from birth, don't have a crib, etc, he : nurses at night instead. I don't have any idea how many times a night : he nurses - sometimes it feels like hardly anything, and sometimes he : seems to be latched on the whole night long. This sounds like Clara. : I sleep with him is "his bed", which is a single mattress on the floor : in our room. I often get him settled, and then go to sleep later in the : "big bed", only to move over sometime during the night. I think as long : as we're cosleeping, it will be hard to night wean, and I'm hoping to : gradually move myself out of his bed. I don't really see it happening : for a while, though. This sounds a LOT like Clara. : My experience with DS1 was of course totally different. Although we : coslept, he seemed to be a deeper sleeper, and was only nursing once a : night (sometimes not at all) by 8 or 9 months. We moved him out at : 13-14 months, which took about two weeks of DH going to him in the : night instead of me, before he basically settled. By 18mo, he was only : nursing to fall asleep for naps and bedtime, and it was pretty easy to : gently transition him to snuggling to sleep instead by 22mo. Now, : however, DH is working very long hours in a high-stress job with a lot : of responsibility, and can't afford broken sleep. So I'm on my own with : DS2, who is generally Mr. Contrary and Independent all day long, and : then Mommy's Little Velcro Baby all night long. He has been known to : climb on top of me to sleep, when I'm trying to sneak out of the bed, : presumably to keep me there! So your DS1 sounds more like Niel. He would wake and nurse maybe one or two times night. Clara would nurse 3 to 5. : So, if anyone has gone through this, did the kid suddenly become a : deeper sleeper and night wean before age 2? Before age 3? Was it : child-led, or at least easy, or did you really have to "break" them of : it? A few months from now DH will be done this heavy stage of work and : might be able to become the nighttime parent for a while, but given the : obstinence of this kid, I don't suppose DS2'll give up easily. We did child led weaning. (with Clara). Monika would nurse her in her bed during the early part of the night, then let her come in our bed within a hour or two of wake-up time. I think she was nursing at least twice a night past 3 yo. I think she was down to the bedtime and wake-u[ sessions by the time she was 4. Niel, on the other hand, nursed only once a night past about 2 1/2. : I just kind of want there to be a light at the end of the tunnel, where : I tuck my kids into bed at 7:30 and don't see them again till the : morning . . . .I want my evenings and nights back, eventually!! Well, neither of them are nursing any more, but this still doesn't happen. Niel, will go right to sleep when we put him to bed, but Clara will lie awake until we go to bed. She is 9 today. : thanks, : Melania Larry |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
Melania wrote: I don't really have a problem that needs fixing, but I would like to hear some other people's stories, if they have had similar experiences to mine, just to get a sense of how long my current situation might last. DS2 is 16 months old, and a few months ago completely reverse cycled. I don't mind, because it means I have a great deal of freedom in the daytime. Since we've coslept from birth, don't have a crib, etc, he nurses at night instead. I don't have any idea how many times a night he nurses - sometimes it feels like hardly anything, and sometimes he seems to be latched on the whole night long. I sleep with him is "his bed", which is a single mattress on the floor in our room. I often get him settled, and then go to sleep later in the "big bed", only to move over sometime during the night. I think as long as we're cosleeping, it will be hard to night wean, and I'm hoping to gradually move myself out of his bed. I don't really see it happening for a while, though. My experience with DS1 was of course totally different. Although we coslept, he seemed to be a deeper sleeper, and was only nursing once a night (sometimes not at all) by 8 or 9 months. We moved him out at 13-14 months, which took about two weeks of DH going to him in the night instead of me, before he basically settled. By 18mo, he was only nursing to fall asleep for naps and bedtime, and it was pretty easy to gently transition him to snuggling to sleep instead by 22mo. Now, however, DH is working very long hours in a high-stress job with a lot of responsibility, and can't afford broken sleep. So I'm on my own with DS2, who is generally Mr. Contrary and Independent all day long, and then Mommy's Little Velcro Baby all night long. He has been known to climb on top of me to sleep, when I'm trying to sneak out of the bed, presumably to keep me there! So, if anyone has gone through this, did the kid suddenly become a deeper sleeper and night wean before age 2? Before age 3? Was it child-led, or at least easy, or did you really have to "break" them of it? A few months from now DH will be done this heavy stage of work and might be able to become the nighttime parent for a while, but given the obstinence of this kid, I don't suppose DS2'll give up easily. I just kind of want there to be a light at the end of the tunnel, where I tuck my kids into bed at 7:30 and don't see them again till the morning . . . .I want my evenings and nights back, eventually!! thanks, Melania i have two kids ages 3 and 2. I'm a very big advocate of night weaning. My 2yo still nurses twice a day. I set strict limits on when she can nurse. before going to sleep and soon after waking up. in her bed and in her room only. This is necessary for my sanity's sake. I woh full time. I can't function without adequate and quality sleep. you dont want to talk to me if I didn't have my 7 hours a night both girls sleep in their room and in separate beds. it didn't come easy. I had to struggle a lot to get here but it is stable now. the 2yo went through phases of nightweaning and suddenly waking up several times a night etc. I had to show her tough-love and do everything but nurse during those times. Finally she got the point that mummy doesnt nurse until the sun comes up. i don't know how badly you want to nightwean but I was desperate. at present, life's good |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
"Melania" wrote in message So, if anyone has gone through this, did the kid suddenly become a deeper sleeper and night wean before age 2? Before age 3? Was it child-led, or at least easy, or did you really have to "break" them of it? A few months from now DH will be done this heavy stage of work and might be able to become the nighttime parent for a while, but given the obstinence of this kid, I don't suppose DS2'll give up easily. Both my older boys were a lot like that. Hunter reverse cycled, Luke just nursed all night. I night weaned them and it was not easy. Hunter was 18mos and it only worked because my milk was drying up due to pg. Luke was also 18mos. It was more gradual but took a very long time. He still woke up asking to nurse until he completely weaned at 26mos. Again, that was mother led. They both co-slept and I had a hard time with that. My kids wouldn't stay asleep without me there beside them so that made it hard. The transition to get them to their own bed was again mother led, and not real easy. I make it sound horrible. ;-) It wasn't fun but it wasn't all that bad. I will say that the twins are in their own room, in their crib and I planned that before I knew there would be two. They sleep better now at 5mo then my other two did/do at 5yo. They are still nursed on demand. -- Nikki, mama to Hunter 4/99 Luke 4/01 Brock 4/06 Ben 4/06 |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
Nikki wrote: I make it sound horrible. ;-) It wasn't fun but it wasn't all that bad. I will say that the twins are in their own room, in their crib and I planned that before I knew there would be two. They sleep better now at 5mo then my other two did/do at 5yo. They are still nursed on demand. Blimey, has it really been 5 months! Jeni |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
wrote in message ups.com... Nikki wrote: I make it sound horrible. ;-) It wasn't fun but it wasn't all that bad. I will say that the twins are in their own room, in their crib and I planned that before I knew there would be two. They sleep better now at 5mo then my other two did/do at 5yo. They are still nursed on demand. Blimey, has it really been 5 months! Hard to believe! They *just* turned 5mo. They are big rowdy already and can't even crawl yet, lol. -- Nikki, mama to Hunter 4/99 Luke 4/01 Brock 4/06 Ben 4/06 |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
Nikki wrote: "Melania" wrote in message So, if anyone has gone through this, did the kid suddenly become a deeper sleeper and night wean before age 2? Before age 3? Was it child-led, or at least easy, or did you really have to "break" them of it? A few months from now DH will be done this heavy stage of work and might be able to become the nighttime parent for a while, but given the obstinence of this kid, I don't suppose DS2'll give up easily. Both my older boys were a lot like that. Hunter reverse cycled, Luke just nursed all night. I night weaned them and it was not easy. Hunter was 18mos and it only worked because my milk was drying up due to pg. Luke was also 18mos. It was more gradual but took a very long time. He still woke up asking to nurse until he completely weaned at 26mos. Again, that was mother led. They both co-slept and I had a hard time with that. My kids wouldn't stay asleep without me there beside them so that made it hard. The transition to get them to their own bed was again mother led, and not real easy. I make it sound horrible. ;-) It wasn't fun but it wasn't all that bad. I will say that the twins are in their own room, in their crib and I planned that before I knew there would be two. They sleep better now at 5mo then my other two did/do at 5yo. They are still nursed on demand. -- Nikki, mama to Hunter 4/99 Luke 4/01 Brock 4/06 Ben 4/06 Wow! I can't believe the little ones are already five months old. Am I reading this correctly, that all of your boys have April birthdays? Thanks for your feedback, Nikki and everyone. Based on what you've all said, and what I know about DS2, I think we'll maintain the status quo at least till the move back to Canada and settling into our new place in January. By then he will be 20mo, instead of 15-16, and I had a lot more luck with communicating about nursing with DS1 when he was 20-22mo. Realistically, I can't use the "tough love" solution, although I know it works for many people. I just don't have the constitution for it, and if I were going to do it, waiting till he's 16mo would not be the way to go! I do hope he becomes a better sleeper, but I'm not holding my breath. He is my kid and I was legendary for my ability to not sleep, for the first ten years or so of my life. If my parents' stories are true, I've gotten off pretty darn lightly with my own two! Thanks again, all! Melania |
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Night weaning and reverse cycling - Anecdotes please!
"Melania" wrote in message Wow! I can't believe the little ones are already five months old. Am I reading this correctly, that all of your boys have April birthdays? I know - time rushes on! Yes, all in April. July must be a good month for me ;-) Based on what you've all said, and what I know about DS2, I think we'll maintain the status quo at least till the move back to Canada and settling into our new place in January. That sounds like a good plan. good luck with the move - in winter no less! -- Nikki, mama to Hunter 4/99 Luke 4/01 Brock 4/06 Ben 4/06 |
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