How bad a situation am I in?

Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

Where are you geographically?

Cameron

"gribble" wrote in message
om...
Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

Where are you geographically?

Cameron

"gribble" wrote in message
om...
Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

Where are you geographically?

Cameron

"gribble" wrote in message
om...
Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

gribble wrote:
Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

No, its only a couple months. Make the court petition, and they may even
make the downward adjustment retro-active to the year end. You are trying,
contact the courts, and don't worry about going to jail.

gribble wrote:
Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

No, its only a couple months. Make the court petition, and they may even
make the downward adjustment retro-active to the year end. You are trying,
contact the courts, and don't worry about going to jail.

gribble wrote:
Hello. Reading just a few posts in this group has gotten me very,
very concerned.

Here's my story:

My Ex-wife petitioned for divorce towards the end of 2002. During
mediation in December of 2002, I knew that money was the only thing
that would win her over, so I offered to pay $600/month in child
support so that I might have custody of our child 1/2 time (we have
weekly rotating custody). The first C/S payment was made by personal
check in January of '03.

Well, towards the end of '03, I got laid off from a $75K/year IT job.
My severance package effectively paid me through the end of the year.
Since an income deduction was in place, the Ex rec'd a total of $7200
in child support (12 * $600) for all of last year. Let me point out
that in our state, the guidelines suggest a monthly payment of
$450/month --given our 50/50 arrangement.

Anyway, I was out of a job in November, December, and January of '04.

In February, I managed to land a job (a short-term contract position),
paying a WHOLE LOT less than I earned previously (about $30,000 less).
I'm just about keeping my head above water, and have kept up with the
mortgage, maintenance, car, credit cards, etc. I wasn't able to give
the Ex anything in January or February, but in March I did cut her a
check for $400. About a week ago I gave her another $200, because she
called to complain that "she's broke". She earns about $38K/year, and
is shacking up with a guy who earns in excess of $70K (he also went
through a divorce at about the same time).

After being laid off, I kept in touch with my attorney, practically
begging him to protect me from being held in contempt of court. We
went back and forth on this for months, until last week he finally
came back to advise me that the guidelines for my state say that with
my new, decreased level of income, my financial commitment is
$50/month. He said that it would cost between $1000 and $1500 to get
the legal documents filed with the court.

In fairness to my Ex, she did place our little one on her health
insurance plan at her place of employ after my layoff (I simply could
not afford to pay the COBRA premium). She claims that this costs her
$200/month. I've never been shown any proof of that.

So, I ask you: how bad a situation am I in? Can I really be sent to
jail for not having paid the full amount of C/S these past 4 months?
It may sound stupid, but I'm really afraid that she will release the
dogs from the c/s enforcement division on me, haul me into court, and
subsequently into jail.

No, its only a couple months. Make the court petition, and they may even
make the downward adjustment retro-active to the year end. You are trying,
contact the courts, and don't worry about going to jail.

The important unknown variable in your case is the attitude/policy of
the judge which might ultimately rule on a contempt citation.
However, under the circumstances you relate, jail is unlikely because
you were not responsible for the reduction in income and you have
continued to make some payments. The worst thing you can do is to
make no payments just because you can't afford to make the whole
payment. First, make sure your payments always go through the child
support agency. Direct payments are dangerous. Second, depending on
where you are, child support agencies can initiate proceedings to
modify support obligations, which includes increases or decreases when
appropriate, at no cost to the parties (except court costs). The
general policy in amending child support orders is to do what's best
for the kids while also considering what you would have done if you
were still married to the mother and had been laid off. The $50.00
per month estimated by your attorney seems unrealistic. Double check
that information.

The important unknown variable in your case is the attitude/policy of
the judge which might ultimately rule on a contempt citation.
However, under the circumstances you relate, jail is unlikely because
you were not responsible for the reduction in income and you have
continued to make some payments. The worst thing you can do is to
make no payments just because you can't afford to make the whole
payment. First, make sure your payments always go through the child
support agency. Direct payments are dangerous. Second, depending on
where you are, child support agencies can initiate proceedings to
modify support obligations, which includes increases or decreases when
appropriate, at no cost to the parties (except court costs). The
general policy in amending child support orders is to do what's best
for the kids while also considering what you would have done if you
were still married to the mother and had been laid off. The $50.00
per month estimated by your attorney seems unrealistic. Double check
that information.

The important unknown variable in your case is the attitude/policy of
the judge which might ultimately rule on a contempt citation.
However, under the circumstances you relate, jail is unlikely because
you were not responsible for the reduction in income and you have
continued to make some payments. The worst thing you can do is to
make no payments just because you can't afford to make the whole
payment. First, make sure your payments always go through the child
support agency. Direct payments are dangerous. Second, depending on
where you are, child support agencies can initiate proceedings to
modify support obligations, which includes increases or decreases when
appropriate, at no cost to the parties (except court costs). The
general policy in amending child support orders is to do what's best
for the kids while also considering what you would have done if you
were still married to the mother and had been laid off. The $50.00
per month estimated by your attorney seems unrealistic. Double check
that information.