Screaming at kid

I'm a bad parent. I have screamed at my child like a lunatic. Now my
child is waking up with nightmares and panic attacks. My child is
only two and a half years old.
I hardly ever yell at my child, but when my child has temper tantrums
for over twenty mintues I totally lose it.
I WISH I WERE FREAKING DEAD! I SHOULD KILL MYSELF BEFORE I EVER HARM
MY CHILD!
What can I do to get help? Who can I turn to? How can I change so I
no longer have a temper.
I DONT' WANT TO DESTROY MY CHILDS LIFE! I WOULD RATHER DIE!
HELP ME!

Hello we all have our moments, Parenting is very hard, its frustrating aggrivating ect.... I know I am the mom of twin fraternal 20 month olf girls. They get on my nerves I yell all the time, kids at this age just do not listen, bottom line. So dont beat yourself up over it. Just try to remember the child doesnt know better, children at this age will do anything get into anything and when its something they want and do not get,yes they will screem fall down cause a seen, its just the age they are .All we can do is try not to hit and yell try not to get too upset because they really dont understand why they cant or arent suppose to do the things they do. Love yourself and your child,do the best you can,its all we can do. Children dont come with a book of instuctions,how are we to know what lies ahead? Just try to do the best you can and take one hour at a time. Take care , Donna