what have I done?

This is posted to misc kids and mkp.

Hello,

I am new here. I am 30 weeks pregnant and in need of some
opinions/support. I am VERY happy to be pregnant, but many terrible
things have happened in my life (death in family, loss of hubby's job,
etc) since I have been pregnant. I got very depressed early on and
have not been taking good care of myself. I am now worried I have
harmed my baby in some way for my carelessness. Here are some things
that I have been doing during this pregnancy.

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Thanks for reading this.

Mindy M wrote:

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

Not terribly good, but I doubt it was harmful to the baby.

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

Splenda is fine, nutrasweet is debatable.

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

I don't know what could be wrong with that, except if it were some kind
of herbal tea that would have bad ingredients?

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

As long as you're not feeling dehydrated you should be fine - by all
means drink more water - but I can't stomach plain water myself and
barely ever drink half as much as I'm supposed to. My baby is fine and
has the right amount of amniotic fluid and everything.

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

That stuff is fine.

"Mindy M" wrote in message
...
This is posted to misc kids and mkp.

Hello,

I am new here. I am 30 weeks pregnant and in need of some
opinions/support. I am VERY happy to be pregnant, but many terrible
things have happened in my life (death in family, loss of hubby's job,
etc) since I have been pregnant. I got very depressed early on and
have not been taking good care of myself. I am now worried I have
harmed my baby in some way for my carelessness. Here are some things
that I have been doing during this pregnancy.

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Thanks for reading this.


I don't think you have done anything if that is all you say you did, but
that is my opinion. I say that because I've done all those things with all
4 of my pregnancies, not because was being careless but because thats just
it is. As far as the fast food goes, it's probably been more lately because
we have been so busy with the 3 kids we have and Chrismas coming and the new
baby coming. I have never gave up my coffee or Diet Cokes during any of my
pregnancys. My two oldest are both in a gifted class at their school and my
4 year old is too smart for his age. But that is me and my kids and of
course. I will defently get replies saying just because your kids came out
all right, blah, blah, blah, that is true but I never *personally* knew
anybody who also did these things while pregnant have any problems with
their newborns nor did there new borns have any problems. But I am sure
someone here has. Have you talk to your doctor or midwife about this? And
if so what does he or she think?

Crystal
38 weeks 4 days & counting!!

"C&J" wrote in message
t...

"Mindy M" wrote in message
...
This is posted to misc kids and mkp.

Hello,

I am new here. I am 30 weeks pregnant and in need of some
opinions/support. I am VERY happy to be pregnant, but many terrible
things have happened in my life (death in family, loss of hubby's job,
etc) since I have been pregnant. I got very depressed early on and
have not been taking good care of myself. I am now worried I have
harmed my baby in some way for my carelessness. Here are some things
that I have been doing during this pregnancy.

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Thanks for reading this.


I don't think you have done anything if that is all you say you did, but
that is my opinion. I say that because I've done all those things with
all
4 of my pregnancies, not because was being careless but because thats just
it is. As far as the fast food goes, it's probably been more lately
because
we have been so busy with the 3 kids we have and Chrismas coming and the
new
baby coming. I have never gave up my coffee or Diet Cokes during any of
my
pregnancys. My two oldest are both in a gifted class at their school and
my
4 year old is too smart for his age. But that is me and my kids and of
course. I will defently get replies saying just because your kids came
out
all right, blah, blah, blah, that is true but I never *personally* knew
anybody who also did these things while pregnant have any problems with
their newborns nor did there new borns have any problems. But I am sure
someone here has. Have you talk to your doctor or midwife about this?
And
if so what does he or she think?

Crystal
38 weeks 4 days & counting!!

LOL........after reading my own post I guess it is a miracle I have smart
kids because I can't seem to write or spell for crap!! My dh was standing
behind me and after I hit the send button he then asked me "what the hell
did you say?" LOL.......Maybe I should lay off some of the caffeine ~

Crystal

This will sound very bad out loud and while writing it down I am cringing a
bit but, with my first child, I didn't know I was pregnant for 4 weeks
(which just happened to be over the christmas period)... As a result, I
drunk copious amounts of alcohol at different parties, I ate plenty of food
that could harbour the listeria(sorry can't spell) virus and I drunk plenty
of strong black coffee... Anyway, to get to the point, I had a good
pregnancy with no problems and my daughter is fine, with no congential,
hereditary or any learning difficulties (going through terrible 2's at the
moment, but she was good prior to them starting).. All reports from her
Childcare teachers, is that she is doing very well and is very
intelligent...

--
Kelly
Mother of Emily 2 and Isabella 1

"Mindy M" wrote in message
...
This is posted to misc kids and mkp.

Hello,

I am new here. I am 30 weeks pregnant and in need of some
opinions/support. I am VERY happy to be pregnant, but many terrible
things have happened in my life (death in family, loss of hubby's job,
etc) since I have been pregnant. I got very depressed early on and
have not been taking good care of myself. I am now worried I have
harmed my baby in some way for my carelessness. Here are some things
that I have been doing during this pregnancy.

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Thanks for reading this.

On Wed, 17 Dec 2003 03:09:17 GMT, Mindy M
wrote:


I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Everything you're doing, with the exception of not enough water, was
stuff my doctor said was safe to do, if not neceesarily the wisest
thing. The not enough water can cause problems but more for you than
for the baby, and if it had yet you would have noticed. I'd say start
doing better and don't worry about it; I don't think you can possibly
have cause real problems.

Sorry to hear things have been going so badly.

Naomi

"Mindy M" wrote in message
...
This is posted to misc kids and mkp.

Hello,

I am new here. I am 30 weeks pregnant and in need of some
opinions/support. I am VERY happy to be pregnant, but many terrible
things have happened in my life (death in family, loss of hubby's job,
etc) since I have been pregnant. I got very depressed early on and
have not been taking good care of myself. I am now worried I have
harmed my baby in some way for my carelessness. Here are some things
that I have been doing during this pregnancy.

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Thanks for reading this.

I did the same thing during my 3rd pregnancy. My husband (aka the food
police) was in Japan for 6 months of the pregnancy, and Sept 11 happened. I
was *stressed*. I ate badly, he was grown on Skittles, I've never liked
water. He was born healthy at 39 weeks weighing 7 lbs 1 (good size for me).
More than anything all the bad eating has probably made you gain a lot of
weight - I gained the most with that pregnancy - 45 lbs +. But it won't
cause birth defects.

I have read some of the other replies to your post and I was the same. I
found out I was pregnant at about 4 or 5 weeks, it was a surprise. I don't
drink alot to begin with but I was drinking for those first few weeks until
I found out. I drank pepsi all through my pregnancy and I ate crappy foods
that I craved. I ate cheerios for breakfast lunch and supper some days !!!
I didn't eat well for most of the pregnancy.... I couldn't stomach salad
dressing and all that healthy food you should eat. The best thing I can
tell you is that you should try to eat a bit better in what is left of your
pregnancy, and drink more water .... you should be drinking water all the
time anyhow. If you haven't been,start taking folic acid and some prenatal
vitamins...... take care of yourself now .... it doesn't reverse not taking
care of yourself ....... but at least it will make you feel better. I
doubt you have harmed the baby..... My daughter was born with a birth
defect.,,....and the doctors say there is nothing we could have done to have
changed that.,..... it was nothing I did or didn't do. My father died in
the 8th month of my second pregnancy and eveyone was very worried aobut
me..but I put the baby first and thought of my dad missing out on
this....and how my son had to be perfect for him.,....

As for your hubby lossing his job, he will find something.... help
him....put your thoughts and efforts into helping him get work.... don't
force the issue with him, as I am sure he is feeling bad enough with a baby
on the way. Just support him in finding a new job.
everything will work out
Good Luck
Karen

"Mindy M" wrote in message
...
This is posted to misc kids and mkp.

Hello,

I am new here. I am 30 weeks pregnant and in need of some
opinions/support. I am VERY happy to be pregnant, but many terrible
things have happened in my life (death in family, loss of hubby's job,
etc) since I have been pregnant. I got very depressed early on and
have not been taking good care of myself. I am now worried I have
harmed my baby in some way for my carelessness. Here are some things
that I have been doing during this pregnancy.

eating total crap (fast food, way too many sweets and sugar) almost
EVERYDAY

drinking several sodas each day with artificial sweeteners (Splenda
and nutrasweet)

drinking decaf tea that was NOT naturally decaffeinated (tons of it)

not getting NEARLY the amount of water I am supposed to (maybe one or
two glasses per day)

took Benadryl and Sudafed for a cold at 7 weeks

I feel so bad now and I am taking better care of myself, but what
about the damage I have done? Could I have caused birth defects from
all these things?

Thanks for reading this.

"Mindy M" wrote in message
...

snip

dear mindy,
i think there is hardly any chance you have damaged your baby

as all the messages already posted say, even when we plan families we tend
to be surprised and are aware quite late to mend some "wrong" food and drink
choices

i was 7 weeks pregnant when i found out and was drinking alcohol on a
regular basis (a bit more as DH's b-day and our anniversary happened in the
fifth week), i was also smoking at the time (!!!! but quit as soon as I
found out I was pregnant), and also had a flu during which i took
antibiotics...

i can't say i was a very healthy eater, but i enjoyed what i ate and
imagined how my baby was enjoying it too

our DD was born three years ago as expected, healthy, weighing 3 kg 450 g,
and developing as other kids (she is a late talker, but no links to
pregnancy, unfortunately just trauma from a hospital visit we had before her
2nd b-day)

i know how money makes all the difference and that losing a job is not at
all what one needs when the baby is just around the corner

death can be a particularly difficult event to deal with when you are about
to have a baby
but try to relax and think of good things to come, to imagine the sweet
little feet and hands and pretty face of your baby
sing to your baby (singing always works to bring your spirits up)
think how your new baby will bring new good things and change life for the
better

lots of good wishes

--
Lejla/Lyla
DD 02 Nov 2000

I don't think you should feel bad. You haven't done anything too terrible. A
junk food diet isn't wonderful, but I don't think it harms the baby. And by
the way, I am not eating nearly as healthy as I thought I woulds myself,
KNOWING I am pregnant. I am so nauseous a lot, I can't usually choose to eat
something I can't keep down. Oddly enough there have been various things I
can eat that I consider junk but it was either that or not be able to eat. I
do the best I can, drink water, take my vitamin-- but I still eat some junk!
Oddly enough I love fresh fruits and veggies normally so I always though
that's how I'd eat during pregnancy. I can't stomach them at all! I can
sometimes keep a salad down...and occasionally one piece of fruit. But for
the most part I am eating more processed foods that I wouldn't really
choose, because I can keep them down. I have never eaten canned
spaghetti-o's before but have eaten that twice in the past week!

Sudafed and Benadryl are both on the list of safe medications from my
doctor. They also list artificial sweeteners as being safe, and caffeine as
well, both in moderation -2-3 cans per day.

You haven't been doing anything that horrific even if it's not "ideal". I
myself gave up on ideal a long time ago...I also had told myself I would not
touch any medications whatsoever during my pregnancy when I became pregnant.
I have allergies and migraines, 2 conditions for which I was taking meds for
daily to prevent. I also used several migraine medications several times per
week when I was getting the bad migraines. I stopped all of this cold turkey
when I found out I was pregnant. I have done ok, I have had some miserable
headaches but not as bad as before the pregnancy. I have been able to do
without my migraine meds except the dr did have to give me some darvocet
during a bad, 3 day long headache. I didn't want to take it but there came a
point when I couldn't sleep from the headache, tylenol hadn't helped, and I
had to do something or I was going to go to the ER. The dr said darvocet was
safe, narcotics don't usually help my headaches so I didn't really want to
use it, but the dr told me using a narcotic for a day or two is completely
safe, whereas my vaso-constricting migraines meds are much much less safe,
so I did end up using the darvocet for a few times. Also, I started having
breathing problems and had to go back on my Zyrtec and Rhinocort nasal
spray. As much as I wanted to not use any meds, I had to or I couldn't have
made it without being crazy and miserable.

Also-- for the 1st month I did not know I was pregnant, so I was on a
cocktail of migraine preventive meds. It took me YEARS of suffering and
neuro visits to find an effective combo. I was weaning off and got pregnant
immediately, the first month. I was on a calcium channel blocker and an
anti-anxiety/anti-seizure medication for the migraines as well as a muscle
relaxer. I was VERY worried when I turned up pregnant before I weaned off
these meds. It looks like everything is ok (and if it's not, it's probably
not the medications- but still I needed to stop them).