Just Found Your Group...

Hi everyone, I am right at 37 weeks pregnant. This baby is due on
January 19, 2004. My son was born exactly four weeks early, but that
was nine years ago and I had problems with my home life, my blood
pressure, and other things, so far with this one everything has been
amazingly wonderful, different Dad, different lifestyle, go figure. I
am 30 years old and scared to death! I always said I wanted a house
full of kids, but the closer the time comes, the more nervous I am, and
MOODY!! My family loves to hate me right now, not really, but they have
made comments about my mood swings.
With my first son, him being a month early, he only weighed 5 =BD
pounds and I thought I was dying, would have bet money on it. My water
broke with him, and I had no real bad pains until they gave me something
to make the contractions come sooner, I forget what it's called, but 30
mins. later when the pains came, I was told I couldn't have anything for
pain or it could stop the labor, natural childbirth is not something I
look forward to again. I am scared. I remember thinking I was going to
die, and I know I didn't and won't with this one, I know it's something
that I have to go through, but I have nightmares about this! My better
half said that his daughter, my 19 year-old step-daughter, weighed over
10 pounds when she was born, & this child already feels huge! Now, I
have been told that it doesn't matter if they are big or small, it still
hurts the same, but this one terrifies me.
Guess I have carried on long enough, I just figured maybe if I talked
about it, I wouldn't be quite so worried. Thanks for listening.

Hi Anita, and congrats on your pregnancy! No real advice to give on
labor...this is my first...but I hope it goes well for you and is easier
than your first!

-Michelle
edd 3/14/04

Anita MS wrote:

Hi everyone, I am right at 37 weeks pregnant. This baby is due on
January 19, 2004. My son was born exactly four weeks early, but that
was nine years ago and I had problems with my home life, my blood
pressure, and other things, so far with this one everything has been
amazingly wonderful, different Dad, different lifestyle, go figure. I
am 30 years old and scared to death! I always said I wanted a house
full of kids, but the closer the time comes, the more nervous I am, and
MOODY!! My family loves to hate me right now, not really, but they have
made comments about my mood swings.
With my first son, him being a month early, he only weighed 5 ½
pounds and I thought I was dying, would have bet money on it. My water
broke with him, and I had no real bad pains until they gave me something
to make the contractions come sooner, I forget what it's called, but 30
mins. later when the pains came, I was told I couldn't have anything for
pain or it could stop the labor, natural childbirth is not something I
look forward to again. I am scared. I remember thinking I was going to
die, and I know I didn't and won't with this one, I know it's something
that I have to go through, but I have nightmares about this! My better
half said that his daughter, my 19 year-old step-daughter, weighed over
10 pounds when she was born, & this child already feels huge! Now, I
have been told that it doesn't matter if they are big or small, it still
hurts the same, but this one terrifies me.
Guess I have carried on long enough, I just figured maybe if I talked
about it, I wouldn't be quite so worried. Thanks for listening.



Hi
Congrats and hope you have an easy one this time!

--
Vidya
mom to Vandu(4)
EDD May 6th '04

On Tue, 23 Dec 2003 16:20:22 -0500, Anita MS wrote:

snips I always said I wanted a house full of kids, but the closer the
time comes, the more nervous I am, and MOODY!! My family loves to hate
me right now, not really, but they have made comments about my mood
swings.

That's perfectly normal late pregnancy behaviour. You are starting to ward
off any potential harm to your baby, and may find you have become very
self-centered. There is nothing wrong with you, think of how mother bears
behave towards strangers when they have cubs (not that you should start
clawing at people ). Tell people how you feel, and that it is not
because of them, but because of the upcoming birth.

With my first son, him being a month early, he only weighed 5 ½
pounds and I thought I was dying, would have bet money on it.

It sounds like you never completely got over this traumatic birth
experience, and therefore you are very scared. It is very good of you to
talk about it like this, nothing works better to get over a bad thing than
talking, IME. Yes, you will have to go through another birth, but there is
absolutely no reason to presume it will be equally bad, and chances are
pretty good it is going to be a lot easier in fact. As many women on this
group can concur, bigger babies are often easier to birth than smaller
ones.

Try to come to terms with your birth experience, and also make sure that
the OB/GYN or midwife who assists you during birth knows about it. A
lingering anxiety can influence how you progress in labour, or how you
respond to certain tests, so it is very important they know. In addition,
they will be much better able to console you, or more eager to administer
any pain medication you might ask for. Make sure you talk it through with
them before you go into labour, and ask them what they can do to help you
through it. Ask how they feel about epidurals, just the idea that you can
ask for one may make you feel reassured, and the more relaxed you are, the
better labour will go. In the end you may not even need any medication,
just because you know it is there....

I am sure you will do just fine giving birth! And feel free to ask for
more support around here if you need it. This is a wonderful group of
women (and some men), and the combined knowledge and experience is
immense. Take advantage of it!

--
-- I
mommy to DS (17m)
mommy to a tiny angel (Oct 2003)
guardian of DH (33)
TTC #2.5
War doesn't decide who's right, only who's left

Welcome and Congratulations! :-)

--
Brigitte aa #2145
edd #3 February 15, 2004
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/j/joshuaandkaterina/

"Readers are plentiful; thinkers are rare."
~ Harriet Martineau

Thank you all. You have been a lot of help and given me some things to
think about too.

Anita

On Tue, 23 Dec 2003 16:20:22 -0500 (EST), (Anita MS)
wrote:

I am right at 37 weeks pregnant.

Congrats and welcome!

--
Daye
Momma to Jayan
"Boy" EDD 11 Jan 2004
See Jayan: http://jayan.topcities.com/

With my first son, him being a month early, he only weighed 5 ½
pounds and I thought I was dying, would have bet money on it.

My friend had something similar happen. Her first was born 11 weeks early.
Her second (7 yrs later) was full-term. She said the "extra" 11 weeks she
had with her second pregnancy was so weird.

Hang in there

Sophie
#4 due 7/18/04

Anita MS writes:
: Hi everyone, I am right at 37 weeks pregnant. This baby is due on
: January 19, 2004.

Hi, and welcome to the newsgroup.

: My son was born exactly four weeks early, but that
: was nine years ago and I had problems with my home life, my blood
: pressure, and other things, so far with this one everything has been
: amazingly wonderful, different Dad, different lifestyle, go figure.

Things like thyis can make a birth experience pretty horrible. With
some support your will have a better experience this time.

: I am 30 years old and scared to death! I always said I wanted a house
: full of kids, but the closer the time comes, the more nervous I am, and
: MOODY!! My family loves to hate me right now, not really, but they have
: made comments about my mood swings.

Mood swings in pregnancy are normal. Hang around here and we will try
to be understanding and helpful.

: With my first son, him being a month early, he only weighed 5 ½
: pounds and I thought I was dying, would have bet money on it. My water
: broke with him, and I had no real bad pains until they gave me something
: to make the contractions come sooner, I forget what it's called, but 30
: mins. later when the pains came, I was told I couldn't have anything for
: pain or it could stop the labor, natural childbirth is not something I
: look forward to again. I am scared. I remember thinking I was going to
: die, and I know I didn't and won't with this one, I know it's something
: that I have to go through, but I have nightmares about this! My better
: half said that his daughter, my 19 year-old step-daughter, weighed over
: 10 pounds when she was born, & this child already feels huge! Now, I
: have been told that it doesn't matter if they are big or small, it still
: hurts the same, but this one terrifies me.

Whoa, slow down. Let's talk about this one thing at a time...

First, you say that you had no bad pains until they gave you meds to
increase your contractions. This is normal, and they way it should be.

I would suspect that what they gave you is pitocin, a drug that is used
to either induce or augment labor. It tends to cause back to back contractions
that are very painful. Very few women can stand to have this drug without
some pain relief. I think this is the problem you faced. The fact that
you gave birth with augmentation and no pain meds is a testament to your
strength!

What you had is NOT a natural childbirth! With a natural childbirth, you
would not have been give the pitocin! Many women can tolerate a REAL
natural childbirth without the excutiating pain you experienced. Just
refuse induction or augmentation, and you will probably not need pain meds
nor will you have the unpleasant experience you had with your first.

Next, if your first was 5+ lbs at 36 weeks, then your next will probably
be around 7+ lbs at term. This is not especially large. Don't listen
to the scare stories! This is one area where being soundly informed can
help you have a better experience. One of the most important factors in
the ease of giving birth can be the POSITION in which you give birth.
Some OBs want you to give birth lying on your back or sitting, but this
closes the birth canal up to 30%. It is much easier to give birth
in a squatting, side lying, kneeling position, or on all fours. You
should discuss this with your OB. I suspect you were placed in the
wrong position for your first birth.

There is no reason for birth to be terrifying or unreasonably painful.
But to make it better, it is very helpful to be knowledgable about what
is going on. I know time is short, but I would recommend Henci Goer's
book "The Thinkning Woman's Guide to a Better Birth."

Finally, seek out the collective support and wisdom of this newsgroup.
There are lots of women who have been through the experience that you
face and can be helpful. If you have questions post and expect good
and insightful answers.

: Guess I have carried on long enough, I just figured maybe if I talked
: about it, I wouldn't be quite so worried. Thanks for listening.

If you are interested you can read about our children Clara's and Niel's
births at http://home.comcast.net/~l.mcmahan.

Good luck,
Larry