Planning to formula feed

"Rosie" wrote in message
...
Personally I think:

Lots of women find breastfeeding unpleasant - the very IDEA of it. They
might think of it as an animal thing, or just really dislike anyone
touching
their breasts. I've never found it comfortable - I LOVE nursing my
daughter, but it's still like having a clothespeg on my nipple!


A friend of mine was literally terified that she would feel sexually excited
by nursing her daughter. I (rather snidely) thought it was unlikely
considering how uptight she was.

Those of us who think of breastfeeding as a lovely and positive thing
should
think ourselves very lucky. Lots of women have bad past experiences/body
images/lack of education/a million other sad reasons in between them and a
positive nursing experience.

At the end of the day, breastfeeding is just a small part of the enormous
task of looking after a baby. Most of us born in the 60's/70's weren't
breastfed, but we were still loved and mothered just as well.

You don't have to breastfeed to be an excellent and loving parent - my
husband doesn't!

ROSIE
xx

SNIP
Some women are squicked out about breastfeeding so they don't want to do
it.
Some go back to work relatively soon, so they don't want to bother. Lots
of
women don't breastfeed because they simply do not understand that it is
important. Their doctors are not giving them the proper information. I
think
more women would breastfeed if their doctors were more pro-breastfeeding.
Most doctors will tell you (probably a CYA situation) that formula is just
as good and most women believe their doctors.



Do docs REALLY still say this kind of thing? My OB and DS's ped BOTH were
strong advocates for nursing. The ped even phoned me several times on the
weekend after birth to see how I was getting along when I had trouble. He
wanted to make sure the nurse had been by for me. And he got me an appt with
an LC himself.

I am surprised that docs still say this. Hell, even the formula companies
are not allowed to say this.

I think the pendulum is swinging back to more women breastfeeding.
Certainly
now, everyone I know is breastfeeding their babies. I also think that
since
more people have access to the computer and are educating themselves more,
the word is spreading that breast is best.


I second this and further think that the more people do it, the less hard it
will be on the new people, until, like in days of old, it is just something
you do. Once upon a time there was no question abotu whether or not a baby
was breastfed.

SNIP

Most doctors will tell you (probably a CYA situation) that formula is just
as good and most women believe their doctors.



Do docs REALLY still say this kind of thing?

They don't so often say exactly that. More likely that most of them make
comforting noises that are supposed to be just sympathy, and people take it for
medical advice. Like the OR nurse who, when I was being wheeled in for my
section, said "I had both my babies by C-section. It's the only way to go."
That's obviously not what she was taught, and she would probably be horrified
if I went out and repeated it as advice against attempting a vaginal birth. It
was her idea of a comforting remark.

--Helen

In article , Stephanie S
writes
SNIP
Some women are squicked out about breastfeeding so they don't want to do
it.
Some go back to work relatively soon, so they don't want to bother. Lots
of
women don't breastfeed because they simply do not understand that it is
important. Their doctors are not giving them the proper information. I
think
more women would breastfeed if their doctors were more pro-breastfeeding.
Most doctors will tell you (probably a CYA situation) that formula is just
as good and most women believe their doctors.



Do docs REALLY still say this kind of thing?

Mine asked me why I was bothering to try to get ds#1 to nurse (rather
than take EBM due to prematurely) as formula would be easier, and was
fine.

When I finally got him to nurse exclusively at six months she asked how
soon I would be weaning, as it was 'gone past time for formula to be
just as good', this in the UK, in 1999!

--
Jenn
UK

"Shannon" wrote in message ...
A good friend of mine who does not have kids yet, has told me in no
uncertain terms that when she has a baby, she will breastfeed for three
months, then its formula the rest of the way. I asked her why, and she told
me that she understands that mother's milk is really the best thing until
three months, but after that, it's "too much trouble".

It's surprising to me, because she saw how easy it was for me to nurse DS
right into toddlerhood. Go figure.

Is she going back to work?

It was much easier for me, personally, to breastfeed my son
before I returned to work. I didn't have much success pumping
(I could pump about 1/3 of the milk my son would drink over
a given period) and the pumping was a hassle. If you're pumping,
you're already dealing with bottles, sterilizing, etc. that
go along with formula, so formula doesn't seem much harder.
Plus, once you're back to work, you can't 'nap when the baby
naps' - you have to act like you're functioning even during
growth spurts when the baby is nursing every hour and a half
all night long. You can't ask your partner to do a night
feed if you can't pump enough milk to begin with, and those
night feeds are critical for supply anyway. Since I was
already worried about supply, I didn't want to give up night
feeds, but I never was able to learn to sleep while nursing
or nurse lying down, and boy was it grueling.

It was definitely easier to bf in some situations. We had
an ice storm last December and it was great not to have to
worry about sterilization of bottles during that week. It
was also great during Sam's two bouts with stomach flu.
I'm glad I stuck with it, and even though Sam is now weaned
at 10+ months I think it was worth it. However, I would
not say overall that breastfeeding was clearly easier.
Better, yes, but that's a different issue.

Beth
Sam 8/16/2002

Anyone planning ahead would have their reasons. They may be misinformed
or they may just have come to different conclusions than we have based
on the same information. Either way, what's important is that they're
doing what they think is best and what works best for their family all
things considered.

--
Suzanne http://cshardie.tripod.com
sittin' on the dock of eBay, watching the bids roll away
--Richard Powers, "Literary Devices"

cshardie wrote,

Formula increases the risk for certain problems, but a mother forced or
guilted into breastfeeding against her will or wishes may increase the
risk of abuse. Having a family that gets along well and loves each other
is more important than health aspects that may or may not be a problem.
--
Suzanne
formula fed and healthier than most anyone else she knows

Well, yes, formula feeding does increase the risk for certain problems.
Certain VERY SERIOUS problems that can have lifelong implications for your
child's health and happiness. Check out the folks at
alt.support.crohns-colitis if you want to find out how a couple of those
conditions can affect people's lives.

I never dreamed that I would actually have to use this response on *this*
board, but....

I WAS FORMULA FED AND I AM NOT HEALTHY.

Please let us not minimize the very real potential health consequences of
formula feeding in an effort to spare feelings on this board, of all places. I
am certainly aware that there are some mothers that have no choice but to
supplement or FF entirely due to insufficient glandular tissue, chemotherapy
drugs, prior breast reduction surgery, or adoption, and it is for these mothers
that formula exists. But mothers who have a choice about breastfeeding need to
understand what exactly may be riding on that choice.

Mary Ellen (diagnosed with ulcerative colitis in 1993)
William (8)
Matthew (6)
Margaret (1)

"Lauren" wrote in message
...
Just interested in opinions here on the point of planning to formula feed
even before a baby is born (or perhaps even conceived).

Unplanned pregnancies and exceptional circumstances aside, I can't help
but
wonder that if it is too much trouble for a parent to even plan to attempt
to breastfeed (or perhaps even plan not to continue after the first couple
of days breastfeeding) then maybe they either aren't ready or aren't
suitable candidates for parenting. Am not sure yet if my own feelings
change
on this subject when the parent in question is under the impression that
formula is 'almost as good'.

Another question is, does your opinion change if there is pressure from
family and friends not to breastfeed?

One other thing, does anyone have any idea or sources of information that
might give some kind of estimate as to how many women plan not to
breastfeed
and reasons given?

As it can be a sensitive subject to some, I wish to point out that this
isn't about parents who try to breastfeed and can't or have been told they
can't or have problems breastfeeding etc. Just the idea of 'planning' not
to
breastfeed at all or past the first couple of days.

Hope I haven't offended anyone, just interested in what other people think
on the subject.


I would hope that women who plan to ff are doing so due to a lack of
information on the great benefits of bf. I believe that bf is a forgotten
art and that education of it benefits would do a lot to change people's
perspectives.
A case in point:
One of my good friends always used to describe bf as gross and bf babies as
parasites. She told me that it was "OK" for me to bf my daughter for 1
year, but that more than that would be wrong (not that I pay that much
mind). She had a phobia about babies in general and would shake if I asked
her to hold DD for me while I went to the loo ... She has always also had a
"thing" about her breasts as she thinks they are too small and *always* has
something to say about my larger breasts.
BUT all that has changed and I'm happy to say that she is bf her 3 week old
DD and plans to continue. I'm happily being bored to tears with her endless
gushing about her beautiful new DD's bf antics and her offers of teaching me
how to bf whilst lying down (an art which I can do, but find incredibly
uncomfortable due to my bust size).
Part of the reason for her changed ideals is that I managed to slip her a
few good books on the benefits of bf when she got pregnant and subtly
encouraged her to attend an ABA course on bf whilst she was pg. ... and now
we behold the changed woman who is the picture of bf motherhood and espouses
the benefits to one and all. It brings a tear to my eye as I stifle laughter
when I hear her repeating my own words of wisdom back to me.

.... and for the record, I consider formula to be almost adequate rather than
almost "as good". In my opinion its what you use to feed a baby when every
attempt at bf has failed.
Cheers
Amanda

"Lauren" wrote in message
...
I can't help but
wonder that if it is too much trouble for a parent to even plan to attempt
to breastfeed (or perhaps even plan not to continue after the first couple
of days breastfeeding) then maybe they either aren't ready or aren't
suitable candidates for parenting.

Well, they are fighting hard to conserve their ignorance. I don't admire
that quality in a parent at all, although far be it from me to say that
someone is not a suitable candidate to be a parent. Sure they are parent
material . . . just not very conscientious.

Another question is, does your opinion change if there is pressure from
family and friends not to breastfeed?

No. Except when pressure to FF comes from the husband, because his
cooperation really does make a big difference when one BFs.

One other thing, does anyone have any idea or sources of information that
might give some kind of estimate as to how many women plan not to
breastfeed
and reasons given?

In the US it's roughly 50%, isn't it? Or even more? The majority of the
reasons not to BF are pure horse****, imo. Including, quite often, feeling
a sense of social or psychic discomfort at using one's breasts to feed a
baby. I mean hello . . . you had sex and grunted out a baby after 9 months
.. . . pretty damn graphic and suggestive compared to nursing, fer cryeye!
Get over yourself!

Hey . . . I had artificial insemination and then a c-section. Might be why
I'm such a committed breastfeeder . . . I need to do *something earthy* ;-)


As it can be a sensitive subject to some, I wish to point out that this
isn't about parents who try to breastfeed and can't or have been told they
can't or have problems breastfeeding etc. Just the idea of 'planning' not
to
breastfeed at all or past the first couple of days.

Yes . . . I understand. I reserve my negative judgment for women who are
able but will not. FF is such a lose/lose activity!

Beth

"Lauren" writes:

Unplanned pregnancies and exceptional circumstances aside, I can't help but
wonder that if it is too much trouble for a parent to even plan to attempt
to breastfeed (or perhaps even plan not to continue after the first couple
of days breastfeeding) then maybe they either aren't ready or aren't
suitable candidates for parenting.

It's like driving an SUV.

Individually: not that risky. Most people I know are healthy and few of us
got any breastmilk.

Populationwise: greatly increases the risk of costly health problems. A
very selfish decision. But it's a free universe.