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#1
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Amusing stats
So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of
2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. - Ron ^*^ |
#2
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"Werebat" wrote in message ... So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of 2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. You've got to be kidding! It's hard to take you seriously when you post erroneously to get people to react. But assuming what you posted is factual: 1. Take her off your health care insurance ASAP. Leave the child on your coverage. 2. Stop making non-court ordered student loan payments. 3. Turn her in for welfare fraud and demand your previous CS payments be credited to reimburse the state for welfare benefits. If you don't do this you will be forced to pay the CS already paid a second time to the state. Now explain a couple of things. She would have to name some man as the father of her child to get welfare benefits. If she didn't name you as the putative father, who did she name? And has the state come after you for a CS order to reimburse welfare benefits? And why aren't you already paying CS to the state based on an existing CS order? |
#3
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"Werebat" wrote in message ... So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of 2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. You've got to be kidding! It's hard to take you seriously when you post erroneously to get people to react. But assuming what you posted is factual: 1. Take her off your health care insurance ASAP. Leave the child on your coverage. 2. Stop making non-court ordered student loan payments. 3. Turn her in for welfare fraud and demand your previous CS payments be credited to reimburse the state for welfare benefits. If you don't do this you will be forced to pay the CS already paid a second time to the state. Now explain a couple of things. She would have to name some man as the father of her child to get welfare benefits. If she didn't name you as the putative father, who did she name? And has the state come after you for a CS order to reimburse welfare benefits? And why aren't you already paying CS to the state based on an existing CS order? |
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"Werebat" wrote in message ... So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of 2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. You've got to be kidding! It's hard to take you seriously when you post erroneously to get people to react. But assuming what you posted is factual: 1. Take her off your health care insurance ASAP. Leave the child on your coverage. 2. Stop making non-court ordered student loan payments. 3. Turn her in for welfare fraud and demand your previous CS payments be credited to reimburse the state for welfare benefits. If you don't do this you will be forced to pay the CS already paid a second time to the state. Now explain a couple of things. She would have to name some man as the father of her child to get welfare benefits. If she didn't name you as the putative father, who did she name? And has the state come after you for a CS order to reimburse welfare benefits? And why aren't you already paying CS to the state based on an existing CS order? |
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Bob Whiteside wrote:
"Werebat" wrote in message .. So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of 2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. You've got to be kidding! It's hard to take you seriously when you post erroneously to get people to react. Nope. This is all true. But assuming what you posted is factual: 1. Take her off your health care insurance ASAP. Leave the child on your coverage. I cannot. In Rhode Island, anyway, I have been told by a lawyer and my health insurance company that the only way to get her off the health insurance would be for one of us to get married, or for me to lose my job. 2. Stop making non-court ordered student loan payments. Yes, those may stop soon, depending on what we agree to out of court about CS payments. She knows that I can always just stop payments on the loans if I'm not happy with the CS, but this complicates things because I'll be done with the money I agreed to pay in a few years. Which is to say, nothing is stopping her from agreeing to one amount of CS, plus the "loan repayment" money, and then turning around and getting back on Welfare as soon as that money runs out. 3. Turn her in for welfare fraud and demand your previous CS payments be credited to reimburse the state for welfare benefits. If you don't do this you will be forced to pay the CS already paid a second time to the state. Already been done! Or, I'm in the process... Actually the woman who worked for the Welfare Fraud Unit seemed really helpful, almost like she actually cared about my situation. We'll see how that goes, but I'm optimistic. Now explain a couple of things. She would have to name some man as the father of her child to get welfare benefits. If she didn't name you as the putative father, who did she name? Umm... She named ME. And has the state come after you for a CS order to reimburse welfare benefits? And why aren't you already paying CS to the state based on an existing CS order? Ah. Well, it went like this. When we divorced, we mediated and I we agreed to $216 per month for child support and $178 per month to repay half of the student living expense loans she had incured while we lived together (this is sort of BS, looking back, because I contributed the lion's share of money to the household while we were together, and I'll never get any of that back from her because I didn't borrow it, I earned it... But at the time we had just spent $3000 of her loan money to buy me a car, and I didn't feel right just leaving her with the bill on that one). We were told that the judge would just rubber-stamp our mediation agreement, but that's not exactly what happened. He raised the CS by $50 per month, and removed the $178 loan repayment entirely. Neither of us read the actual decree, working on the assumption that it was just a rubber-stamp of our agreement. Trouble for me really started when she got on Welfare. We both received summons to court to have my CS adjusted, and I didn't understand why (we had only divorced a few months previously, and she said she hadn't asked to have CS adjusted... Now I know better how the system works). We both forgot to appear in court -- we're absent-minded and didn't realize what was really going on -- and remembered on the same day. She called Welfare and they told her that the court date was only to tell us that her CS payments had to go to the Family Court system instead of to her directly. I began making payments to the Family Court System, but for $216 per month -- not the $266 per month the state knew about from reading the divorce decree. Therefore, by their reckoning, I was $50 per month short on my payments. Also, I hadn't shown up in court for them to "adjust" (read: raise) my CS obligation. Eventually my ex got off Welfare, and told me to pay her directly. I called Welfare to check on this and a clerk told me that she was right, I was all paid up, and she was no longer on Welfare (this was, again, sort of half true -- my ex was no longer on Welfare, but I wasn't "all paid up" by CSE's reckoning). I began giving the checks to my ex. About a year later my ex went back on Welfare. She told me to mail the checks to the Family Courts again, and I did. A few months later, something interesting happened. She told me again that she was off Welfare, and that I should mail the checks directly to her. This time, she was lying. I had intended to call Welfare to check on this, but I never got around to it, partly because she had been honest the last time and I didn't really doubt that she was telling me the truth. I stopped sending money to the Family Court system and began sending it directly to her. This went on for exactly twelve months. At that point, I was pulled over for "driving suspiciously" at 2:00 am (on the way back from a friend's house), told that there was a warrant out for my arrest, and taken to jail. Of course this was early on a Sunday morning, so I ended up having to go to the ACI for a night. Lots of fun. I never did figure out exactly what the warrant was FOR, but I think it was for not showing up in court for them to raise my CS obligation. Again, I understand a lot more about the system now than I did at the time. In court, it was revealed that my ex was still on Welfare. Curiously, the judge harped on the $50 per month I was short in my payments from the first time my ex got on Welfare, but never mentioned the entire YEAR that I had made no payments at all! CSE's lawyer also wanted to raise my CS obligations to the maximum, based on a salary that I didn't make (somehow they had decided that I earned $60,000 per year). Luckily I had a lawyer who convinced the judge to continue the case and give us a chance to sort things out. Meanwhile, I was ordered to make CS payments to the courts by check. The first month I did so, CSE also began garnishing my wages ("double dipping" for a month, as I didn't learn about the garnishment until I had already sent in the money for that particular month). I was able to prove that I had made the payments to the payroll office at work, and they stalled until the end of the month. I recieved a notice that I had to pay a lump sum to the Family Courts of about $600, which *seemed* to be for the missing $50 per month from my ex's original stint with Welfare (it didn't say exactly where the owed money came from, just that I owed it and if I didn't pay they would cancel my license, forbid passports, etc.) In all of this, no one has mentioned the year of payments I didn't make. My useless lawyer told me not to mention them to anyone. It appears that this advice would only have gotten me screwed eventually. After calling CSE and asking them about the situation, I was told to call the Welfare Fraud Unit. There I was told that if I reported my ex, I would likely be able to avoid having to pay for the missing year, as they would come after my ex instead. My ex knew what I was doing, and that I was just doing it to protect my own finances, and I told the same thing to the Welfare Fraud woman, who seemed to believe me. She told me she wasn't going to prosecute my ex, just pull her in and tell her that she owed them money. My hunch is that trouble will brew if my ex simply refuses to pay, as CSE will ultimately cast about to take the money from SOMEONE, and that will be me. My hope is that my ex, confronted with all the cancelled checks, will concede and get some money from her parents to pay off Welfare with. Meanwhile, my ex has gotten off Welfare and we are supposed to appear in court to agree on an amount of CS, which we are told the judge will likely agree to. The interesting thing going on is that while the $$$ have certainly lit up in my ex's eyes by this point, she also knows that if she pushes it too far I will simply stop paying the loan money, which I am under no obligation to pay. For my part, it makes the most sense to keep giving her the loan money, at least until an agreement about CS is reached. After that, we'll see. - Ron ^*^ |
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Bob Whiteside wrote:
"Werebat" wrote in message .. So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of 2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. You've got to be kidding! It's hard to take you seriously when you post erroneously to get people to react. Nope. This is all true. But assuming what you posted is factual: 1. Take her off your health care insurance ASAP. Leave the child on your coverage. I cannot. In Rhode Island, anyway, I have been told by a lawyer and my health insurance company that the only way to get her off the health insurance would be for one of us to get married, or for me to lose my job. 2. Stop making non-court ordered student loan payments. Yes, those may stop soon, depending on what we agree to out of court about CS payments. She knows that I can always just stop payments on the loans if I'm not happy with the CS, but this complicates things because I'll be done with the money I agreed to pay in a few years. Which is to say, nothing is stopping her from agreeing to one amount of CS, plus the "loan repayment" money, and then turning around and getting back on Welfare as soon as that money runs out. 3. Turn her in for welfare fraud and demand your previous CS payments be credited to reimburse the state for welfare benefits. If you don't do this you will be forced to pay the CS already paid a second time to the state. Already been done! Or, I'm in the process... Actually the woman who worked for the Welfare Fraud Unit seemed really helpful, almost like she actually cared about my situation. We'll see how that goes, but I'm optimistic. Now explain a couple of things. She would have to name some man as the father of her child to get welfare benefits. If she didn't name you as the putative father, who did she name? Umm... She named ME. And has the state come after you for a CS order to reimburse welfare benefits? And why aren't you already paying CS to the state based on an existing CS order? Ah. Well, it went like this. When we divorced, we mediated and I we agreed to $216 per month for child support and $178 per month to repay half of the student living expense loans she had incured while we lived together (this is sort of BS, looking back, because I contributed the lion's share of money to the household while we were together, and I'll never get any of that back from her because I didn't borrow it, I earned it... But at the time we had just spent $3000 of her loan money to buy me a car, and I didn't feel right just leaving her with the bill on that one). We were told that the judge would just rubber-stamp our mediation agreement, but that's not exactly what happened. He raised the CS by $50 per month, and removed the $178 loan repayment entirely. Neither of us read the actual decree, working on the assumption that it was just a rubber-stamp of our agreement. Trouble for me really started when she got on Welfare. We both received summons to court to have my CS adjusted, and I didn't understand why (we had only divorced a few months previously, and she said she hadn't asked to have CS adjusted... Now I know better how the system works). We both forgot to appear in court -- we're absent-minded and didn't realize what was really going on -- and remembered on the same day. She called Welfare and they told her that the court date was only to tell us that her CS payments had to go to the Family Court system instead of to her directly. I began making payments to the Family Court System, but for $216 per month -- not the $266 per month the state knew about from reading the divorce decree. Therefore, by their reckoning, I was $50 per month short on my payments. Also, I hadn't shown up in court for them to "adjust" (read: raise) my CS obligation. Eventually my ex got off Welfare, and told me to pay her directly. I called Welfare to check on this and a clerk told me that she was right, I was all paid up, and she was no longer on Welfare (this was, again, sort of half true -- my ex was no longer on Welfare, but I wasn't "all paid up" by CSE's reckoning). I began giving the checks to my ex. About a year later my ex went back on Welfare. She told me to mail the checks to the Family Courts again, and I did. A few months later, something interesting happened. She told me again that she was off Welfare, and that I should mail the checks directly to her. This time, she was lying. I had intended to call Welfare to check on this, but I never got around to it, partly because she had been honest the last time and I didn't really doubt that she was telling me the truth. I stopped sending money to the Family Court system and began sending it directly to her. This went on for exactly twelve months. At that point, I was pulled over for "driving suspiciously" at 2:00 am (on the way back from a friend's house), told that there was a warrant out for my arrest, and taken to jail. Of course this was early on a Sunday morning, so I ended up having to go to the ACI for a night. Lots of fun. I never did figure out exactly what the warrant was FOR, but I think it was for not showing up in court for them to raise my CS obligation. Again, I understand a lot more about the system now than I did at the time. In court, it was revealed that my ex was still on Welfare. Curiously, the judge harped on the $50 per month I was short in my payments from the first time my ex got on Welfare, but never mentioned the entire YEAR that I had made no payments at all! CSE's lawyer also wanted to raise my CS obligations to the maximum, based on a salary that I didn't make (somehow they had decided that I earned $60,000 per year). Luckily I had a lawyer who convinced the judge to continue the case and give us a chance to sort things out. Meanwhile, I was ordered to make CS payments to the courts by check. The first month I did so, CSE also began garnishing my wages ("double dipping" for a month, as I didn't learn about the garnishment until I had already sent in the money for that particular month). I was able to prove that I had made the payments to the payroll office at work, and they stalled until the end of the month. I recieved a notice that I had to pay a lump sum to the Family Courts of about $600, which *seemed* to be for the missing $50 per month from my ex's original stint with Welfare (it didn't say exactly where the owed money came from, just that I owed it and if I didn't pay they would cancel my license, forbid passports, etc.) In all of this, no one has mentioned the year of payments I didn't make. My useless lawyer told me not to mention them to anyone. It appears that this advice would only have gotten me screwed eventually. After calling CSE and asking them about the situation, I was told to call the Welfare Fraud Unit. There I was told that if I reported my ex, I would likely be able to avoid having to pay for the missing year, as they would come after my ex instead. My ex knew what I was doing, and that I was just doing it to protect my own finances, and I told the same thing to the Welfare Fraud woman, who seemed to believe me. She told me she wasn't going to prosecute my ex, just pull her in and tell her that she owed them money. My hunch is that trouble will brew if my ex simply refuses to pay, as CSE will ultimately cast about to take the money from SOMEONE, and that will be me. My hope is that my ex, confronted with all the cancelled checks, will concede and get some money from her parents to pay off Welfare with. Meanwhile, my ex has gotten off Welfare and we are supposed to appear in court to agree on an amount of CS, which we are told the judge will likely agree to. The interesting thing going on is that while the $$$ have certainly lit up in my ex's eyes by this point, she also knows that if she pushes it too far I will simply stop paying the loan money, which I am under no obligation to pay. For my part, it makes the most sense to keep giving her the loan money, at least until an agreement about CS is reached. After that, we'll see. - Ron ^*^ |
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Bob Whiteside wrote:
"Werebat" wrote in message .. So, just got the skinny on my ex's finances for the entire year of 2003... Because she was cheating and collecting money from me as well as Welfare for our son, her monthly finances broke down to: $600 (Social Security, disability (depression)) $400 (Welfare, for our son) $216 (Child Support) $178 ("Student Loan Repayments" I gave her as part of divorce agreement) $300 (Food Stamps) These are conservative estimates, so the reality is that she was pulling in about $1700 per month for sitting on her ass. The "Student Loan Repayments" do not go to paying anything off, she uses them to live off of. Mind you, she has our son in her presence less than 40% of the week. So, collecting a tax-free revenue of over $20,000 per year, for caring for her own son 40% of the time while I work full-time and care for me son the same amount of time to pull in about $30,000 (after taxes, CS, and "loan repayment" money). But let's not forget the money she collected from churches with her sob stories of living "below the poverty level" (at $20,000 per year, tax-free)! "In the big rock candy mountain..." Now that she's been revealed as a Welfare Fraud, the best she can hope for for next year is: $600 (SS) $700 (CS) $300 (Food Stamps) $1600 per month. CS could easily be raised by our state law, but it would be highly unlikely to see it jacked up to the max if she's off Welfare and I have the child so much of the time. She's also been told that Food Stamps will to lowered with the loss of Welfare. I am not legally obligated to give the "Student Loan" money, and if I felt I was getting screwed with CS, I'd drop the loan payment money because I can. What we have to do now is come up with an agreed-upon sum of money, and present it to the judge. I've offered half of the maximum CS amount, or about $350 per month. Not sure what the point of this was, it's just that I was floored she was getting so muhc in food stamps and amazed at how much money she was raking in for the past year, while claiming to be living "below the poverty level". She's still on my health insurance. Amazing. You've got to be kidding! It's hard to take you seriously when you post erroneously to get people to react. Nope. This is all true. But assuming what you posted is factual: 1. Take her off your health care insurance ASAP. Leave the child on your coverage. I cannot. In Rhode Island, anyway, I have been told by a lawyer and my health insurance company that the only way to get her off the health insurance would be for one of us to get married, or for me to lose my job. 2. Stop making non-court ordered student loan payments. Yes, those may stop soon, depending on what we agree to out of court about CS payments. She knows that I can always just stop payments on the loans if I'm not happy with the CS, but this complicates things because I'll be done with the money I agreed to pay in a few years. Which is to say, nothing is stopping her from agreeing to one amount of CS, plus the "loan repayment" money, and then turning around and getting back on Welfare as soon as that money runs out. 3. Turn her in for welfare fraud and demand your previous CS payments be credited to reimburse the state for welfare benefits. If you don't do this you will be forced to pay the CS already paid a second time to the state. Already been done! Or, I'm in the process... Actually the woman who worked for the Welfare Fraud Unit seemed really helpful, almost like she actually cared about my situation. We'll see how that goes, but I'm optimistic. Now explain a couple of things. She would have to name some man as the father of her child to get welfare benefits. If she didn't name you as the putative father, who did she name? Umm... She named ME. And has the state come after you for a CS order to reimburse welfare benefits? And why aren't you already paying CS to the state based on an existing CS order? Ah. Well, it went like this. When we divorced, we mediated and I we agreed to $216 per month for child support and $178 per month to repay half of the student living expense loans she had incured while we lived together (this is sort of BS, looking back, because I contributed the lion's share of money to the household while we were together, and I'll never get any of that back from her because I didn't borrow it, I earned it... But at the time we had just spent $3000 of her loan money to buy me a car, and I didn't feel right just leaving her with the bill on that one). We were told that the judge would just rubber-stamp our mediation agreement, but that's not exactly what happened. He raised the CS by $50 per month, and removed the $178 loan repayment entirely. Neither of us read the actual decree, working on the assumption that it was just a rubber-stamp of our agreement. Trouble for me really started when she got on Welfare. We both received summons to court to have my CS adjusted, and I didn't understand why (we had only divorced a few months previously, and she said she hadn't asked to have CS adjusted... Now I know better how the system works). We both forgot to appear in court -- we're absent-minded and didn't realize what was really going on -- and remembered on the same day. She called Welfare and they told her that the court date was only to tell us that her CS payments had to go to the Family Court system instead of to her directly. I began making payments to the Family Court System, but for $216 per month -- not the $266 per month the state knew about from reading the divorce decree. Therefore, by their reckoning, I was $50 per month short on my payments. Also, I hadn't shown up in court for them to "adjust" (read: raise) my CS obligation. Eventually my ex got off Welfare, and told me to pay her directly. I called Welfare to check on this and a clerk told me that she was right, I was all paid up, and she was no longer on Welfare (this was, again, sort of half true -- my ex was no longer on Welfare, but I wasn't "all paid up" by CSE's reckoning). I began giving the checks to my ex. About a year later my ex went back on Welfare. She told me to mail the checks to the Family Courts again, and I did. A few months later, something interesting happened. She told me again that she was off Welfare, and that I should mail the checks directly to her. This time, she was lying. I had intended to call Welfare to check on this, but I never got around to it, partly because she had been honest the last time and I didn't really doubt that she was telling me the truth. I stopped sending money to the Family Court system and began sending it directly to her. This went on for exactly twelve months. At that point, I was pulled over for "driving suspiciously" at 2:00 am (on the way back from a friend's house), told that there was a warrant out for my arrest, and taken to jail. Of course this was early on a Sunday morning, so I ended up having to go to the ACI for a night. Lots of fun. I never did figure out exactly what the warrant was FOR, but I think it was for not showing up in court for them to raise my CS obligation. Again, I understand a lot more about the system now than I did at the time. In court, it was revealed that my ex was still on Welfare. Curiously, the judge harped on the $50 per month I was short in my payments from the first time my ex got on Welfare, but never mentioned the entire YEAR that I had made no payments at all! CSE's lawyer also wanted to raise my CS obligations to the maximum, based on a salary that I didn't make (somehow they had decided that I earned $60,000 per year). Luckily I had a lawyer who convinced the judge to continue the case and give us a chance to sort things out. Meanwhile, I was ordered to make CS payments to the courts by check. The first month I did so, CSE also began garnishing my wages ("double dipping" for a month, as I didn't learn about the garnishment until I had already sent in the money for that particular month). I was able to prove that I had made the payments to the payroll office at work, and they stalled until the end of the month. I recieved a notice that I had to pay a lump sum to the Family Courts of about $600, which *seemed* to be for the missing $50 per month from my ex's original stint with Welfare (it didn't say exactly where the owed money came from, just that I owed it and if I didn't pay they would cancel my license, forbid passports, etc.) In all of this, no one has mentioned the year of payments I didn't make. My useless lawyer told me not to mention them to anyone. It appears that this advice would only have gotten me screwed eventually. After calling CSE and asking them about the situation, I was told to call the Welfare Fraud Unit. There I was told that if I reported my ex, I would likely be able to avoid having to pay for the missing year, as they would come after my ex instead. My ex knew what I was doing, and that I was just doing it to protect my own finances, and I told the same thing to the Welfare Fraud woman, who seemed to believe me. She told me she wasn't going to prosecute my ex, just pull her in and tell her that she owed them money. My hunch is that trouble will brew if my ex simply refuses to pay, as CSE will ultimately cast about to take the money from SOMEONE, and that will be me. My hope is that my ex, confronted with all the cancelled checks, will concede and get some money from her parents to pay off Welfare with. Meanwhile, my ex has gotten off Welfare and we are supposed to appear in court to agree on an amount of CS, which we are told the judge will likely agree to. The interesting thing going on is that while the $$$ have certainly lit up in my ex's eyes by this point, she also knows that if she pushes it too far I will simply stop paying the loan money, which I am under no obligation to pay. For my part, it makes the most sense to keep giving her the loan money, at least until an agreement about CS is reached. After that, we'll see. - Ron ^*^ |
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