I have a daughter that is 6 her "father" hasn't paid a dime

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Indyguy1" wrote in message
...
AZ wrote:

A woman who chooses to keep a child when she knows that the
father
is
opposed to it should be prepared to raise it on her own.

A man who chooses to participate in an activity that can produce a
child
should
be prepared to help raise it.

A man should have
the ability to opt-out of fatherhood with the same impunity that
the
mother
has.

He has the same opportunity, just at a different time.

Actually, Indy, he doesn't. If there is an "ooops" discovered after
the
act, SHE still has choices. But he no longer has any. I agree with
AZ
that
a woman who chooses to bring a child into the world on her own
should
make
darn sure she can support it on her own. If she can't do so, she
should
have the decency to give the child up for adoption, rather than
feeling
that
she should have a pipeline to a man's wallet for 2 decades. Perhaps
CSE
should check the financials of all unmarried mothers-to-be and take
the
babies of those who cannot, either on their own or with a cosigner,
meet
the
stringent financial requirements of supporting the child. But I do
agree
with you that abstinence would prevent the entire problem.



That's all find and dandy but what about the soon to be father who
claims
that yes, he will help raise the child, he will be a DAD but then
changes
his mind after the baby is born? Before the mother realizes it, she IS
a
single mom, whether she wanted to be or not. Should she then dump the
kid
off that she has raised a few years because she doesn't have a lot of
money?

My opinion, Tiffany, is that any woman--married or single--should make
sure
that she has the means to support her child(ren) by herself in this day
and
age. Things happen--accidents, poor economy, war--you never know when
you
will find yourself alone. It is only wise to be prepared. That's not
to
criticize those to whom this has already happened, and they were not
prepared--you can't turn back the clock. But it is important for every
parent to be self supporting in some way in these uncertain times.



I agree but one doesn't always know these things until later in life. lol
Age makes us wiser!

.......... or just an older fool.


T

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Indyguy1" wrote in message
...
AZ wrote:

A woman who chooses to keep a child when she knows that the
father
is
opposed to it should be prepared to raise it on her own.

A man who chooses to participate in an activity that can produce a
child
should
be prepared to help raise it.

A man should have
the ability to opt-out of fatherhood with the same impunity that
the
mother
has.

He has the same opportunity, just at a different time.

Actually, Indy, he doesn't. If there is an "ooops" discovered after
the
act, SHE still has choices. But he no longer has any. I agree with
AZ
that
a woman who chooses to bring a child into the world on her own
should
make
darn sure she can support it on her own. If she can't do so, she
should
have the decency to give the child up for adoption, rather than
feeling
that
she should have a pipeline to a man's wallet for 2 decades. Perhaps
CSE
should check the financials of all unmarried mothers-to-be and take
the
babies of those who cannot, either on their own or with a cosigner,
meet
the
stringent financial requirements of supporting the child. But I do
agree
with you that abstinence would prevent the entire problem.



That's all find and dandy but what about the soon to be father who
claims
that yes, he will help raise the child, he will be a DAD but then
changes
his mind after the baby is born? Before the mother realizes it, she IS
a
single mom, whether she wanted to be or not. Should she then dump the
kid
off that she has raised a few years because she doesn't have a lot of
money?

My opinion, Tiffany, is that any woman--married or single--should make
sure
that she has the means to support her child(ren) by herself in this day
and
age. Things happen--accidents, poor economy, war--you never know when
you
will find yourself alone. It is only wise to be prepared. That's not
to
criticize those to whom this has already happened, and they were not
prepared--you can't turn back the clock. But it is important for every
parent to be self supporting in some way in these uncertain times.



I agree but one doesn't always know these things until later in life. lol
Age makes us wiser!

.......... or just an older fool.


T

Phil,
I had to respond to your last comment.I was the ONLY one working in this
house for 5 years.I was supporting the children and their father..and when
I was with My 6 year olds father I supported him too.The man I am with now
just got a job.IT's not someone I just chose off the street to be her next
father.My story is nothing like that.
I was engaged to be married and I broke it off cause after having 2 kids
things started to go down hill. During the break up I met my daughters
father (it was about a yr. later) We were talking about marriage and how
much he wanted a baby.then I got pregnant and he started cheating on
me..He choked me in front of my 2 toddlers,and he ended up sending me to
the hospitol when I was pregnant with his daughter. The last straw was
when he went to another state to go to work(uh huh) and found out he was
cheating on me the whole time.His daughter was 6 months old at this time.I
then asked him to leave and we spoke a few times and that was it,he
dissappeared.
I went back with my childrens father and we have been together ever since
my now 6 yr. old daughter was a baby so she knows no other daddy...He's
the only man she has ever known. BTW yes I still support my daughter.I am
a C.N.A. at a nursing home.Thats all I have to say on this.

Phil,
I had to respond to your last comment.I was the ONLY one working in this
house for 5 years.I was supporting the children and their father..and when
I was with My 6 year olds father I supported him too.The man I am with now
just got a job.IT's not someone I just chose off the street to be her next
father.My story is nothing like that.
I was engaged to be married and I broke it off cause after having 2 kids
things started to go down hill. During the break up I met my daughters
father (it was about a yr. later) We were talking about marriage and how
much he wanted a baby.then I got pregnant and he started cheating on
me..He choked me in front of my 2 toddlers,and he ended up sending me to
the hospitol when I was pregnant with his daughter. The last straw was
when he went to another state to go to work(uh huh) and found out he was
cheating on me the whole time.His daughter was 6 months old at this time.I
then asked him to leave and we spoke a few times and that was it,he
dissappeared.
I went back with my childrens father and we have been together ever since
my now 6 yr. old daughter was a baby so she knows no other daddy...He's
the only man she has ever known. BTW yes I still support my daughter.I am
a C.N.A. at a nursing home.Thats all I have to say on this.

Phil,
I had to respond to your last comment.I was the ONLY one working in this
house for 5 years.I was supporting the children and their father..and when
I was with My 6 year olds father I supported him too.The man I am with now
just got a job.IT's not someone I just chose off the street to be her next
father.My story is nothing like that.
I was engaged to be married and I broke it off cause after having 2 kids
things started to go down hill. During the break up I met my daughters
father (it was about a yr. later) We were talking about marriage and how
much he wanted a baby.then I got pregnant and he started cheating on
me..He choked me in front of my 2 toddlers,and he ended up sending me to
the hospitol when I was pregnant with his daughter. The last straw was
when he went to another state to go to work(uh huh) and found out he was
cheating on me the whole time.His daughter was 6 months old at this time.I
then asked him to leave and we spoke a few times and that was it,he
dissappeared.
I went back with my childrens father and we have been together ever since
my now 6 yr. old daughter was a baby so she knows no other daddy...He's
the only man she has ever known. BTW yes I still support my daughter.I am
a C.N.A. at a nursing home.Thats all I have to say on this.

"Chris" wrote in message
news:A6oIc.17898$yc.11945@fed1read06...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Indyguy1" wrote in message
...
AZ wrote:

A woman who chooses to keep a child when she knows that the
father
is
opposed to it should be prepared to raise it on her own.

A man who chooses to participate in an activity that can produce
a
child
should
be prepared to help raise it.

A man should have
the ability to opt-out of fatherhood with the same impunity
that
the
mother
has.

He has the same opportunity, just at a different time.

Actually, Indy, he doesn't. If there is an "ooops" discovered
after
the
act, SHE still has choices. But he no longer has any. I agree
with
AZ
that
a woman who chooses to bring a child into the world on her own
should
make
darn sure she can support it on her own. If she can't do so, she
should
have the decency to give the child up for adoption, rather than
feeling
that
she should have a pipeline to a man's wallet for 2 decades.
Perhaps
CSE
should check the financials of all unmarried mothers-to-be and
take
the
babies of those who cannot, either on their own or with a
cosigner,
meet
the
stringent financial requirements of supporting the child. But I
do
agree
with you that abstinence would prevent the entire problem.



That's all find and dandy but what about the soon to be father who
claims
that yes, he will help raise the child, he will be a DAD but then
changes
his mind after the baby is born? Before the mother realizes it, she
IS
a
single mom, whether she wanted to be or not. Should she then dump
the
kid
off that she has raised a few years because she doesn't have a lot
of
money?

My opinion, Tiffany, is that any woman--married or single--should make
sure
that she has the means to support her child(ren) by herself in this
day
and
age. Things happen--accidents, poor economy, war--you never know when
you
will find yourself alone. It is only wise to be prepared. That's not
to
criticize those to whom this has already happened, and they were not
prepared--you can't turn back the clock. But it is important for
every
parent to be self supporting in some way in these uncertain times.



I agree but one doesn't always know these things until later in life.
lol
Age makes us wiser!

......... or just an older fool.

Oh, Chris--you've got to stop thinking about yourself so negatively.........

"Chris" wrote in message
news:A6oIc.17898$yc.11945@fed1read06...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Indyguy1" wrote in message
...
AZ wrote:

A woman who chooses to keep a child when she knows that the
father
is
opposed to it should be prepared to raise it on her own.

A man who chooses to participate in an activity that can produce
a
child
should
be prepared to help raise it.

A man should have
the ability to opt-out of fatherhood with the same impunity
that
the
mother
has.

He has the same opportunity, just at a different time.

Actually, Indy, he doesn't. If there is an "ooops" discovered
after
the
act, SHE still has choices. But he no longer has any. I agree
with
AZ
that
a woman who chooses to bring a child into the world on her own
should
make
darn sure she can support it on her own. If she can't do so, she
should
have the decency to give the child up for adoption, rather than
feeling
that
she should have a pipeline to a man's wallet for 2 decades.
Perhaps
CSE
should check the financials of all unmarried mothers-to-be and
take
the
babies of those who cannot, either on their own or with a
cosigner,
meet
the
stringent financial requirements of supporting the child. But I
do
agree
with you that abstinence would prevent the entire problem.



That's all find and dandy but what about the soon to be father who
claims
that yes, he will help raise the child, he will be a DAD but then
changes
his mind after the baby is born? Before the mother realizes it, she
IS
a
single mom, whether she wanted to be or not. Should she then dump
the
kid
off that she has raised a few years because she doesn't have a lot
of
money?

My opinion, Tiffany, is that any woman--married or single--should make
sure
that she has the means to support her child(ren) by herself in this
day
and
age. Things happen--accidents, poor economy, war--you never know when
you
will find yourself alone. It is only wise to be prepared. That's not
to
criticize those to whom this has already happened, and they were not
prepared--you can't turn back the clock. But it is important for
every
parent to be self supporting in some way in these uncertain times.



I agree but one doesn't always know these things until later in life.
lol
Age makes us wiser!

......... or just an older fool.

Oh, Chris--you've got to stop thinking about yourself so negatively.........

"Chris" wrote in message
news:A6oIc.17898$yc.11945@fed1read06...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Indyguy1" wrote in message
...
AZ wrote:

A woman who chooses to keep a child when she knows that the
father
is
opposed to it should be prepared to raise it on her own.

A man who chooses to participate in an activity that can produce
a
child
should
be prepared to help raise it.

A man should have
the ability to opt-out of fatherhood with the same impunity
that
the
mother
has.

He has the same opportunity, just at a different time.

Actually, Indy, he doesn't. If there is an "ooops" discovered
after
the
act, SHE still has choices. But he no longer has any. I agree
with
AZ
that
a woman who chooses to bring a child into the world on her own
should
make
darn sure she can support it on her own. If she can't do so, she
should
have the decency to give the child up for adoption, rather than
feeling
that
she should have a pipeline to a man's wallet for 2 decades.
Perhaps
CSE
should check the financials of all unmarried mothers-to-be and
take
the
babies of those who cannot, either on their own or with a
cosigner,
meet
the
stringent financial requirements of supporting the child. But I
do
agree
with you that abstinence would prevent the entire problem.



That's all find and dandy but what about the soon to be father who
claims
that yes, he will help raise the child, he will be a DAD but then
changes
his mind after the baby is born? Before the mother realizes it, she
IS
a
single mom, whether she wanted to be or not. Should she then dump
the
kid
off that she has raised a few years because she doesn't have a lot
of
money?

My opinion, Tiffany, is that any woman--married or single--should make
sure
that she has the means to support her child(ren) by herself in this
day
and
age. Things happen--accidents, poor economy, war--you never know when
you
will find yourself alone. It is only wise to be prepared. That's not
to
criticize those to whom this has already happened, and they were not
prepared--you can't turn back the clock. But it is important for
every
parent to be self supporting in some way in these uncertain times.



I agree but one doesn't always know these things until later in life.
lol
Age makes us wiser!

......... or just an older fool.

Oh, Chris--you've got to stop thinking about yourself so negatively.........

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
.net...


snip for length


Okay. So what are your feelings about women who have children out of
wedlock and refuse to use one of the many choices women have to deal
with
a
pregnancy when they are not married?

I don't think in or out of wedlock is in issue. Two people can take care
of
their children without being married.

I don't agree with you on this, Tiffany. If you are going to agree to raise
children together, why would you not take the step of marriage? Why would
the man say "Sure, I want to be the father of your children" and not be
willing to commit to you? Marriage is an expression of commitment, and
raising a child together *is* a commitment.

My brother-in-law was telling us today that he had broken up with his long
time girlfriend. They were listening to the radio and someone on the
program made the comment that, if a girl went out with a guy for more than 2
years, she was expecting marriage. (They had been together for 5) He turned
to her in surprise, and said "Is that true?" She just looked at him. So he
said "Gosh, I'm sorry. I have no intention of getting married." SHE
thought they were committed to each other. HE thought she was a lot of fun.

The question is not whether 2 people *can* raise a child together without
being married. It's a question of whether or not their ideas of commitment
are even close to being the same. "Sure, I'll help" may not mean the same
thing to the guy as it does to the gal.

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
.net...


snip for length


Okay. So what are your feelings about women who have children out of
wedlock and refuse to use one of the many choices women have to deal
with
a
pregnancy when they are not married?

I don't think in or out of wedlock is in issue. Two people can take care
of
their children without being married.

I don't agree with you on this, Tiffany. If you are going to agree to raise
children together, why would you not take the step of marriage? Why would
the man say "Sure, I want to be the father of your children" and not be
willing to commit to you? Marriage is an expression of commitment, and
raising a child together *is* a commitment.

My brother-in-law was telling us today that he had broken up with his long
time girlfriend. They were listening to the radio and someone on the
program made the comment that, if a girl went out with a guy for more than 2
years, she was expecting marriage. (They had been together for 5) He turned
to her in surprise, and said "Is that true?" She just looked at him. So he
said "Gosh, I'm sorry. I have no intention of getting married." SHE
thought they were committed to each other. HE thought she was a lot of fun.

The question is not whether 2 people *can* raise a child together without
being married. It's a question of whether or not their ideas of commitment
are even close to being the same. "Sure, I'll help" may not mean the same
thing to the guy as it does to the gal.