keeping kids tidy

Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. I found her favorite shirt stained with something
brown and some greasy stain on it today in at leat 7 or 8 spots. It
took a half inch of stain stick to get it treated. Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

What can I do? What should I do to help her keep her food in her
mouth/stomach or on her plate? Is this normal?

Karen G

PS Comparisons are odious, but my 3 year old doesn't have any trouble
with this issue.

Karen G wrote:
Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. I found her favorite shirt stained with something
brown and some greasy stain on it today in at leat 7 or 8 spots. It
took a half inch of stain stick to get it treated. Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

What can I do? What should I do to help her keep her food in her
mouth/stomach or on her plate? Is this normal?

Your 5-yo sounds normal to me. But I have an 8-yo
who thinks shirts are really napkins that you wear

Scott DD 10.5 and DS 8

If you discover the trick, let me know.

Marijke
mom to three teens who still stain their clothes on occasion


"Karen G" wrote in message
...
Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. I found her favorite shirt stained with something
brown and some greasy stain on it today in at leat 7 or 8 spots. It
took a half inch of stain stick to get it treated. Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

What can I do? What should I do to help her keep her food in her
mouth/stomach or on her plate? Is this normal?

Karen G

PS Comparisons are odious, but my 3 year old doesn't have any trouble
with this issue.

Hi -

I had the same problem with one of my kids, now mostly resolved at age
8. We just keep reminding him to "sit up straight and eat over your
plate". We had to be on top of him at all meals to enforce this.

We also discovered that his abdominal muscles were very weak, so we
started doing crunchers and stuff with him. It helped, and helped with
sitting properly at the table!

I hope these suggestions help,
--Beth Kevles

http://web.mit.edu/kevles/www/nomilk.html -- a page for the milk-allergic
Disclaimer: Nothing in this message should be construed as medical
advice. Please consult with your own medical practicioner.

NOTE: No email is read at my MIT address. Use the AOL one if you would
like me to reply.

In article ,
Karen G wrote:
Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. I found her favorite shirt stained with something
brown and some greasy stain on it today in at leat 7 or 8 spots. It
took a half inch of stain stick to get it treated. Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

With my 7yo, I often have him take off his shirt to eat dinner if we
are having something messy. Since he is a boy and rarely gets cold,
he usually just eats with no shirt, but we do have some "grubby" tops
he could put on instead if he wanted.

His issues are usually related to fidgeting at the table (so he is not
necessarily in his chair or eating over the table) or wiping his hands
on his clothes. For this you just have to watch and remind
frequently. It's getting better but...

Good luck,

Robyn (mommy to Ryan 9/93 and Matthew 6/96 and Evan 3/01)
--
Support a family business and learn about the technologies underlying
the Internet with the TCP/IP Guide! http://www.tcpipguide.com
Special Limited-Time Offer for Educators Currently Available

"Far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to
work hard at work worth doing." -- Theodore Roosevelt

In article ,
Karen G wrote:

Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. I found her favorite shirt stained with something
brown and some greasy stain on it today in at leat 7 or 8 spots. It
took a half inch of stain stick to get it treated. Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

What can I do? What should I do to help her keep her food in her
mouth/stomach or on her plate? Is this normal?

Karen G

PS Comparisons are odious, but my 3 year old doesn't have any trouble
with this issue.


Some kids just seem to attract dirt. I'm one of them: my grandma told
me that when I was a baby, she thought my mom wasn't doing a very good
job, because I was ALWAYS dirty -- until she took care of me herself.

I'm still like that. I have to work REALLY HARD to have my clothes
clean at the end of the day. My kids joke about the "(maiden name)
gene" -- there have been a few meals where a number of my family
members have all ended up with similar spots on our clothing, and my
kids think it's hilarious.

I don't think any amount of prodding, cajolling, harping, or anything
else could have made a difference: I am what I am. No matter how I
sit, no matter how careful I am, no matter how attentive I am -- this is
just the way it is. I've taken to useing "bibs" for messier meals.

I think your best bet is to start teaching him now to take care of his
own laundry: give HIM a stain stick, and show him how to use it, and
get him to use it daily when he takes his clothes off at night. You'll
have to help him at first, of course, but he'll start to notice when his
clothes have gotten dirtier than normal, and that awareness may help him
figure out how to be more careful (or not . . .). At a minimum, YOU
will be out of the job of taking care of it!

meh
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

"Karen G" wrote in message
...
Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. [snip] Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

What can I do? What should I do to help her keep her food in her
mouth/stomach or on her plate? Is this normal?

It can be -- as you say, your 3 YO isn't like that, so not *all* kids are
very messy with their food, but plenty of 5 YOs certainly are. However, you
can stay on her while she is eating to eat over her plate. That's what I do.
It does make meals less enjoyable, as I'm pretty much constantly saying
either "please eat with your mouth closed!" to my 8 YO son (actually, he is
finally getting better about that) or "please keep your food over your
plate!" to my 5 YO daughter. Then, my husband gets worked up about my son
not using his utensils -- he is almost 9 after all -- and about both of the
kids not sitting face-front at the table! Dinnertime is not "bonding time"
around here, to say the least.

So, pick your poison: bug 'em during the meal, hoping that eventually they
will internalize your lessons, or let it go for a while longer and take the
dirty clothes. Maybe she could wear an apron?

Karen G

PS Comparisons are odious, but my 3 year old doesn't have any trouble
with this issue.

In article , Beth Gallagher wrote:

"Karen G" wrote in message
...
Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. [snip] Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

What can I do? What should I do to help her keep her food in her
mouth/stomach or on her plate? Is this normal?

It can be -- as you say, your 3 YO isn't like that, so not *all* kids are
very messy with their food, but plenty of 5 YOs certainly are. However, you
can stay on her while she is eating to eat over her plate. That's what I do.
It does make meals less enjoyable, as I'm pretty much constantly saying
either "please eat with your mouth closed!" to my 8 YO son (actually, he is
finally getting better about that) or "please keep your food over your
plate!" to my 5 YO daughter. Then, my husband gets worked up about my son
not using his utensils -- he is almost 9 after all -- and about both of the
kids not sitting face-front at the table! Dinnertime is not "bonding time"
around here, to say the least.

So, pick your poison: bug 'em during the meal, hoping that eventually they
will internalize your lessons, or let it go for a while longer and take the
dirty clothes. Maybe she could wear an apron?

We've never had much problem with my son spilling food on his
clothes---he's always had good fine motor control. We have had
trouble getting him to sit down to eat. He prefers doing many things
standing up (eating, writing, drawing). At home, we generally let him
stand as long as he doesn't move away from the table without being
excused, but in restaurants he has to sit. We also have to remind him
to put his book on the other side of the plate or bowl, so that he
doesn't spill anything on the books. (We only let him read at
breakfast and lunch---at dinner we try to have conversation.)


--
Kevin Karplus http://www.soe.ucsc.edu/~karplus
life member (LAB, Adventure Cycling, American Youth Hostels)
Effective Cycling Instructor #218-ck (lapsed)
Professor of Biomolecular Engineering, University of California, Santa Cruz
Undergraduate and Graduate Director, Bioinformatics
Affiliations for identification only.

dragonlady wrote:

I think your best bet is to start teaching him now to take care of his
own laundry: give HIM a stain stick, and show him how to use it, and
get him to use it daily when he takes his clothes off at night. You'll
have to help him at first, of course, but he'll start to notice when his
clothes have gotten dirtier than normal, and that awareness may help him
figure out how to be more careful (or not . . .). At a minimum, YOU
will be out of the job of taking care of it!

meh

Thank You. I tought her how to use the stain stick last night. I gave
her specific instructions about putting it on and washing her hands
afterward. Obviously, the first time was pretty exciting. We'll see
what she thinks of it in a week. Fortunately considering her age, she
has good motor skills to work the stain stick--she said that it works
just like a glue stick.

Karen G

(Robyn Kozierok) wrote:

In article ,
Karen G wrote:
Am I expecting too much? My 5 year old is still doing quite a number on
her clothing. I expect a certain amount of dirt, paint, and other "fun"
stuff to get on her clothes, but it seems like she should be making some
progress with food. I found her favorite shirt stained with something
brown and some greasy stain on it today in at leat 7 or 8 spots. It
took a half inch of stain stick to get it treated. Unfortunately this
isn't at all unusual. In fact, her favorite clothes tend to get stained
first.

I have to say that I still have a problem with this - usually eating
in a hurry. I start out nicely, but then get careless and ... oops!!

I think this is partly because my bosom is perfectly placed to catch
stuff that falls. I rarely wear plain color tops because they show
stains too much. My dad who had a stomach similarly placed always
had problems with stained ties.

With my 7yo, I often have him take off his shirt to eat dinner if we
are having something messy. Since he is a boy and rarely gets cold,
he usually just eats with no shirt, but we do have some "grubby" tops
he could put on instead if he wanted.

I know my DIL said that when they have sphaghetti her dd (who was
about 5 when she said this) sits at the table with no top. She joked
that when she was dating the boys would say .." .. just take her out
and have her order sphaghetti and see what she does."

DD#1 was very neat and could eat sphaghetti with out getting it on
herself at about 3. Everyone is different.

His issues are usually related to fidgeting at the table (so he is not
necessarily in his chair or eating over the table) or wiping his hands
on his clothes. For this you just have to watch and remind
frequently. It's getting better but...

Good luck,

Robyn (mommy to Ryan 9/93 and Matthew 6/96 and Evan 3/01)

grandma Rosalie