Newborn and sleep

On Jul 10, 10:00 pm, Anne Rogers wrote:
Oh and the other thing is sometimes nothing helps. We feel helpless,
but honestly sometimes we think just letting him cry for 10 mins in
his crib seems to help. Maybe it helps him de-energize or something.

only 10 minutes? some babies at this age will cry for hours and be
unconsolable, 10 minutes really sounds very acceptable, your aim in life
isn't for your child to never cry, or be soothed instantly, but to
meet his needs, sometimes part of doing that includes some time crying.

Cheers

Anne

I'm sorry, I wasn't clear. We'll let him cry it out for 10 mins before
picking him up again. Sometimes that seems to help, although the wife
is reluctant to do so.

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On Jul 10, 10:00 pm, Anne Rogers wrote:
Oh and the other thing is sometimes nothing helps. We feel helpless,
but honestly sometimes we think just letting him cry for 10 mins in
his crib seems to help. Maybe it helps him de-energize or something.

only 10 minutes? some babies at this age will cry for hours and be
unconsolable, 10 minutes really sounds very acceptable, your aim in life
isn't for your child to never cry, or be soothed instantly, but to
meet his needs, sometimes part of doing that includes some time crying.

Cheers

Anne

I'm sorry, I wasn't clear. We'll let him cry it out for 10 mins before
picking him up again. Sometimes that seems to help, although the wife
is reluctant to do so.


Either which way, 10 minutes isn't very long to let him cry. Anne's
comment, "your aim in life
isn't for your child to never cry, or be soothed instantly, but to meet his
needs, sometimes part of doing that includes some time crying" still stands
true.

For me, with both of my girls, I figured they'd only be babies once (heck,
only be newborns once) and tried to spend as much time with them, holding
them, feeding them, etc, as I could in those first 3 months. I mean,
obviously they have to sleep, and they can't be in my arms 24/7, but at only
1 month old, your little bean is still so young, so immature, and is barely
out of the womb. He's had the constant compantionship of your wife for the
last 9 months, so it makes sense that he senses when he doesn't have someone
near him and isn't a fan of it.

Do you or your wife have a Baby Bjorn, or sling? That way you can wear him
for an extended period of time, yet still do stuff around the house, even if
it's sitting at the computer typing over/around your baby's head. That
might help both you and your wife, and the baby, all get what they want.
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys -- 01/03/03
Addison Grace -- 09/30/04

"Jamie Clark" wrote in message
...
snip

Do you or your wife have a Baby Bjorn, or sling? That way you can wear
him for an extended period of time, yet still do stuff around the house,

even if
it's sitting at the computer typing over/around your baby's head. That
might help both you and your wife, and the baby, all get what they want.
You don't need a sling to hold him and type on the keyboard. I'm feeding #3
as I type and don't need anything to hold him.
Debbie

On Jul 11, 8:45 am, "Jamie Clark" wrote:
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On Jul 10, 10:00 pm, Anne Rogers wrote:
Oh and the other thing is sometimes nothing helps. We feel helpless,
but honestly sometimes we think just letting him cry for 10 mins in
his crib seems to help. Maybe it helps him de-energize or something.

only 10 minutes? some babies at this age will cry for hours and be
unconsolable, 10 minutes really sounds very acceptable, your aim in life
isn't for your child to never cry, or be soothed instantly, but to
meet his needs, sometimes part of doing that includes some time crying.

Cheers

Anne

I'm sorry, I wasn't clear. We'll let him cry it out for 10 mins before
picking him up again. Sometimes that seems to help, although the wife
is reluctant to do so.

Either which way, 10 minutes isn't very long to let him cry. Anne's
comment, "your aim in life
isn't for your child to never cry, or be soothed instantly, but to meet his
needs, sometimes part of doing that includes some time crying" still stands
true.

For me, with both of my girls, I figured they'd only be babies once (heck,
only be newborns once) and tried to spend as much time with them, holding
them, feeding them, etc, as I could in those first 3 months. I mean,
obviously they have to sleep, and they can't be in my arms 24/7, but at only
1 month old, your little bean is still so young, so immature, and is barely
out of the womb. He's had the constant compantionship of your wife for the
last 9 months, so it makes sense that he senses when he doesn't have someone
near him and isn't a fan of it.

Do you or your wife have a Baby Bjorn, or sling? That way you can wear him
for an extended period of time, yet still do stuff around the house, even if
it's sitting at the computer typing over/around your baby's head. That
might help both you and your wife, and the baby, all get what they want.
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys -- 01/03/03
Addison Grace -- 09/30/04- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Hi Jamie,
Actually we're looking into the sling. She tried the snuggly, but it
was too cumbersome to use.

Some days my wife says he cries all day (off and on), for no apparent
reason.

On Jul 11, 3:11 am, "Welches"
wrote:
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On Jul 10, 5:46 pm, Anne Rogers wrote:
I agree with Jamie, as long as you don't just keep doing the same thing
because it's what you've always done and at least give a brief try to
what you ultimately want before trying other tricks, I don't think at
this age you are making a rod for your own back. I know plenty of people
who've not intended to co sleep, ended up doing so for the first 6
weeks, but not having any long term issues.

Swaddling can be good, but I would be cautious just now depending on
where you are, if you have air conditioning it would be fine, but here
in WA we're having a heat wave and not many people have air con -
swaddling a baby in these conditions would be dangerous.

Cheers
Anne

Oh and the other thing is sometimes nothing helps. We feel helpless,
but honestly sometimes we think just letting him cry for 10 mins in
his crib seems to help. Maybe it helps him de-energize or something.

I agree with Anne that 10 minutes is not long, although it can feel hours
for you! He may be colicy at a month. Sometimes putting them down to cry for
a few minutes can help. If they're windy and it doesn't seem to be coming
out, then a few minutes crying seemed (for 2 of mine*) help it to come out.
They'd burp as soon as I picked them up. It also tires them so then can then
go off to sleep quicker.
#3 is a month old (just) and he has on several occasions had to be left to
cry (in moses basket) or taken out hungry and crying while I do
something/fetch older sisters. Doesn't often happen but if I have to fetch
#1 from school just as he decides he's hungry then he has to wait about 10
minutes. (I have tried feeding him in the sling, but he's too nosy and
doesn't like lying down in the sling because he can't see!)
Debbie

*Leaving to cry didn't work for #2. She'd just get more and more hysterical
and take for ever to calm down afterwards.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Here's another question, I've read that around 3 months things get
better in regards to the crying. In other words it seems right now,
when he's awake, he's crying sometimes he's just spacing out but for
the most part he spends his day crying. Does it get better by three
months? (I really hope so)...And what can we expect around 6 months in
regards to crying?

Thanks guys!

wrote:

Actually we're looking into the sling. She tried the snuggly, but it
was too cumbersome to use.

Slings take a little practice, but often work well once
you get the hang of it. Personally, I prefer unpadded slings,
but everyone has their personal preferences.

Some days my wife says he cries all day (off and on), for no apparent
reason.

Some babies are like that and it just takes a while
for them to settle in. If it's something fixable, it seems
like the most common culprit is diet.

Best wishes,
Ericka

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On Jul 11, 3:11 am, "Welches"
wrote:
wrote in message

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On Jul 10, 5:46 pm, Anne Rogers wrote:
I agree with Jamie, as long as you don't just keep doing the same
thing
because it's what you've always done and at least give a brief try to
what you ultimately want before trying other tricks, I don't think at
this age you are making a rod for your own back. I know plenty of
people
who've not intended to co sleep, ended up doing so for the first 6
weeks, but not having any long term issues.

Swaddling can be good, but I would be cautious just now depending on
where you are, if you have air conditioning it would be fine, but here
in WA we're having a heat wave and not many people have air con -
swaddling a baby in these conditions would be dangerous.

Cheers
Anne

Oh and the other thing is sometimes nothing helps. We feel helpless,
but honestly sometimes we think just letting him cry for 10 mins in
his crib seems to help. Maybe it helps him de-energize or something.

I agree with Anne that 10 minutes is not long, although it can feel hours
for you! He may be colicy at a month. Sometimes putting them down to cry
for
a few minutes can help. If they're windy and it doesn't seem to be coming
out, then a few minutes crying seemed (for 2 of mine*) help it to come
out.
They'd burp as soon as I picked them up. It also tires them so then can
then
go off to sleep quicker.
#3 is a month old (just) and he has on several occasions had to be left
to
cry (in moses basket) or taken out hungry and crying while I do
something/fetch older sisters. Doesn't often happen but if I have to
fetch
#1 from school just as he decides he's hungry then he has to wait about
10
minutes. (I have tried feeding him in the sling, but he's too nosy and
doesn't like lying down in the sling because he can't see!)
Debbie

*Leaving to cry didn't work for #2. She'd just get more and more
hysterical
and take for ever to calm down afterwards.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Here's another question, I've read that around 3 months things get
better in regards to the crying. In other words it seems right now,
when he's awake, he's crying sometimes he's just spacing out but for
the most part he spends his day crying. Does it get better by three
months? (I really hope so)...And what can we expect around 6 months in
regards to crying?

For #2 I certainly remember it getting better round 3 months. It was very
gradual, more suddenly thinking "hey, she hasn't sounded windy at night for
a few nights" rather than a sudden change.
At the moment they don't do a lot when awake except feed and cry. #3's began
to bop his baby gym (neither of the others liked doing that) and will keep
himself entertained for sometimes nearly 10 minutes! That's really long time
for this age! Really the best thing for this age is an older sibling who
will get on playing round them, and just keep them interested.
I find the best thing for an inconsolable baby is the sling. Put them in the
sling and walk down to the shops. Sometimes it was the only way of consoling
#2 at that age.

When I nannied, the first couple of weeks I tended to view it as a failure
if the baby (he was 6 months) cried at all. So if they cried I felt panicky,
which didn't help. About then I went out for the day with the baby and
mother, and I discovered something. He cried even when his mother was there,
even when she was holding him! After that I realised that he would cry at
times and all I could do was my best to make sure he wasn't hungry, tired or
needing a cuddle. Then I got on much better.
So when you see these confident parents with their perpetually happy
children, just remind yourself that these babies still cry.
Debbie

wrote:

Here's another question, I've read that around 3 months things get
better in regards to the crying. In other words it seems right now,
when he's awake, he's crying sometimes he's just spacing out but for
the most part he spends his day crying. Does it get better by three
months? (I really hope so)...And what can we expect around 6 months in
regards to crying?

Babies are very different. If it's colic, then it
often does start to improve around 3 months. If it's just
being a newborn, you might start to see improvement around
6 weeks. If it's diet (or something else causing a problem),
you might not see a lot of improvement until you fix the problem.
Some kids are temperamentally more fussy than others. Some
get lucky and have babies that literally almost never cry.
So, unfortunately, that's not a very helpful answer. Odds
are, however, that it will be improving by then.

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Welches" wrote in message
...

"Jamie Clark" wrote in message
...
snip

Do you or your wife have a Baby Bjorn, or sling? That way you can wear
him for an extended period of time, yet still do stuff around the house,

even if
it's sitting at the computer typing over/around your baby's head. That
might help both you and your wife, and the baby, all get what they want.

You don't need a sling to hold him and type on the keyboard. I'm feeding
#3 as I type and don't need anything to hold him.
Debbie

While that's true, there are still lots of other things that they may be
able to do more comfortably while wearing their child in some sort of
carrier or sling, that they cannot do now, without one.
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys -- 01/03/03
Addison Grace -- 09/30/04

"Jamie Clark" wrote in message
. ..
"Welches" wrote in message
...

"Jamie Clark" wrote in message
...
snip

Do you or your wife have a Baby Bjorn, or sling? That way you can wear
him for an extended period of time, yet still do stuff around the house,

even if
it's sitting at the computer typing over/around your baby's head. That
might help both you and your wife, and the baby, all get what they want.

You don't need a sling to hold him and type on the keyboard. I'm feeding
#3 as I type and don't need anything to hold him.
Debbie

While that's true, there are still lots of other things that they may be
able to do more comfortably while wearing their child in some sort of
carrier or sling, that they cannot do now, without one.
--
Agreed:
But if you're chopping veg. then make sure they're facing inwards rather
than outwards once they're at the stage of grabbing!
Debbie