Divorced mom of two

"turtledove" wrote in message
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"Kristen313" wrote in message
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My advice is to develop thicker skin

Hmmm yeah we should continue the online thing. I think what's
difficult
for him at times is that I'm not always this funny witty all-that kindof
woman... I do laundry, sit and read, I can be pretty boring because hell
my
life can be hectic, and bloody hell, I'm on vacation! He's in for a
rude
awakening when Fall Semester hits. lol I mean, I'm purposely trying to
take
it easy meanwhile he's working (but not supporting us, but I still think
he's a tad annoyed because he hasn't actually seen me during the school
year
where I'm active, goal-orientated, he came here while I was on
vacation.)
So there's a bit of tension sometimes because I feel guilty about doing
nothing (although I do the laundry, cook and take care of the boys etc,
so
in my books it's not entirely nothing.) But on the otherhand, I know I
need
the break because I was severly burnt out last semester and I can not
let
that happen this term.
Anyways, we're starting to work things out because it was a
difficult
transition to make. Sometimes I find he's changed, other times he's my
best
friend, sometimes I feel we have nothing in common, and other times just
him
walking in the door makes me smile. Errrrr my life is full of
contradictions. lol I think what's difficult for me is that I talked to
him
for 6 months online and over the phone... we'd talk for hours, he knows
me
better than anyone so when he got here, it was like a blind date, only
it
wasn't... and then for about a week or so there was this honeymoon
period,
and a month later it's like we've been married for 20 years. We seem to
have skipped a step, a step I think is vital because although I do know
him,
realistically I don't. Do you know what I mean? I've talked to friends
about this, but they can't really help me because they've never been
there.
I'm going to give it time so we can both adjust to real life because I
do
want this to work, I want him in my life... but I'm starting to wonder
if
I
can spend the rest of my life, with this man, in that way. I feel like
we're friends, more than anything, and is that enough for me? I don't
know.
Ahhh sorry guys for the incoherent ramblings. lol I'm just unloading
what
I
feel, ANY advice would be appreciated.

Christine



I SOOOOOOOO understand where you are coming from. Friendship is very
important. And yes, it does seem as if you 'skip' a step online. I think
it's because you do a lot of the mental bonding with no physical
bonding....so when the physical bonding comes (and I'm not talking sex,
I'm
talking everything else) it's almost scary in a way. Emotionally
overwhelming at times. So when you run the gamant of emotions that one
has
with a partner from annoyance or anger to happiness and ecstacy...your
highs
are higher than expected, and the lows can take your breath away as
well....because you didn't bond with him emotionally and physically at the
same time..

did that make any sense whatsoever?

I think time will tell. Cammy and I dated for over 2 years before we got
married. We didn't live together, but we may as well have....we were
together 80% of the time. Remember you skipped the dating part of the
relationship. You dated online and on the phone, but not face to face.

Another thing, I was very much used to being a homebody and I'm extremely
independent. Allowing myself to completely fall for someone was extremely
hard for me. Once bitten twice shy and all that. Remember to acknowledge
the fact that you deserve happiness with someone....Doing that is hard.
Allowing yourself to 'let go' with someone is scary...and even after 4
years
with him is still scary at times. As single parents we build up many
walls
that we may not realize. Allow yourself to be happy. Don't be afraid.
Enjoy your life.

feel free to write me anytime if you want. brianne at alpha66 dot com or
pharmchic at hotmail dot com.

hugs,
*bri


Thanks, what you said makes perfect sense to me. lol And I'm going to take
you up on writing once and awhile because this is so weird for me and it's
nice to talk to someone who knows and has made it a success.

Christine

In ,
CME typed:
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"steveb" wrote in message
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(Kristen313) lifted the trapdoor, peered
around and wrote:

Oh, oh, oh can I be on that list??? lmao

Christine

No Christine, and now neither, sadly(?) can I. Merely by posting
here, we are now "involved." LOL



Never fear...

I've already written you both up! So, you are on MY list...so
watch yourself!!

hehe,
*b

Hmmmm. Being on the Queen B's list...is this a good thing or a bad
thing? BTW when dealing with nicknames...I used to be known as
Beasty. Long story, maybe someday I will share it if anyone's
interested.

Betsy
--
Meddle not in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and good
with ketchup.



Well you know you can't just leave it at that! lol Spill it girl.


Christine

OK here it goes. I began working at a local hospital on the night
shift. When my diabetes got so out of control the doctor told me no
more nights, I switched to the day shift. The first day I worked,
they spelled my name wrong when putting up the assignment. Instead
of Betsy, I was called Besty. That was actually pretty cool. "Best"
nurse...Besty. Well after a couple of weeks of being called Besty
every morning the charge nurse made a slip. Subconcious I don't
really know. Anyway, the e came out long instead of short. Thus
the nickname Beasty was born. Of course while telling the story,
one of the Cardiologists overheard and commented, "Don't worry, it's
just Bitch for short." I knew then I really belonged, because that
doctor either ignored you, or picked on you. Once picked on, you
were a true staff member. So I was Beasty to most folks, which was
OK because sometimes I could be a real "beast." LOL! So that's it,
in a nutshell, or not.

Betsy
--
Meddle not in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and good
with ketchup.


LOL Yeah I've always found it a compliment if I was called a bitch
and the like, because I'd rather be known as that, than a pushover.
I'm a strong-headed woman, and if crossed, hell ya I can be a bitch!
lol Besides, I'm finding with my generation, insults can be a term
of endearment. Weird, eh? lol

Christine

Look at the letters in Bitch. They stand for Babe In Total Control of
Herself! I am proud to be one. LOL

Betsy
--
Meddle not in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and good with
ketchup.

just curous i know a joelle who is from the syracuse area i meet at
fishnet festival back in the 80s that wouldnt be u would it

just curous i know a joelle who is from the syracuse area i meet at
fishnet festival back in the 80s that wouldnt be u would it

No, never been to syracuse and the last time I wore fishnets it was in the 6th
grade, which would have been in the late 60s.

Joelle
If you want to make God laugh, tell him what you are doing tomorrow
Father Mike

"man hate sucks" wrote in message
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"Ring4SaleandMore" wrote in message
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Keep in mind we usually reap what we sow and all that.


You dont know you've sown bad seed until it's too late

"Joelle" wrote in message
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I disagree with what you said. And I don't expect everyone who reads
what I
wrote to have a clue, either. LOL You don't.

Why don't you get a clue and learn how to post so we know what the hell
you are
talking about. Not that it would make any more sense if you did...

Joelle
If you want to make God laugh, tell him what you are doing tomorrow
Father Mike

Bad day Joelle?......Vicar still playing hard to get???....LOL

"Cele" wrote in message
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On 18 Jun 2003 13:29:18 GMT,
(Ring4SaleandMore) wrote:


Snipping........is such a feckin pain in the arse.....

because people won't hire you since you have it...even
though you are eager to work!! They figure you will leave as soon as you
find a
better job. Help!! Lissy D.

Hi and welcome. There are people here whose experiences may be of help
to you.....I do know about being severely broke. I think many of us
here do.

You should try it......tis an education.....I went from having the best of
everything (as a single girl) to being broke (as a s/p) and worked my way
back up the financial ladder. Now I spend like my ass is on fire......was
much better when I was broke......Hence I'm going for broke again! LOLOL

Dolores

I have daughters, 15 & 18. The older one has moved out and is
thousands of miles away. The younger one is entering grade 11 & lives
with me. She visits her dad whenever she wants, which is often. I'm
very lucky on that score - he's an excellent father.

Cele

"Jennifer Valliere" wrote in message
...
welcome to our group. i am new here also. i am a single mom of one
trying to make it in this world also.

everyone is great in here with giving advice and listening to what you
have to say. you will really enjoy it in here.



LOLOL.....Yeah....until the FBI haul yer ass off! (In loving memory of
Petey)

Dolores

"Kristen313" wrote in message
...


Nope, still don't see where I admit to come here to cause trouble. I do,
however, admit to having come here to find a group of grown-up,
well-adjusted
single parents. Haven't had any luck with that, either.

It's yer luuuuuucky day Kirsten!!.....

Dolores

Nope, still don't see where I admit to come here to cause trouble. I do,
however, admit to having come here to find a group of grown-up,
well-adjusted
single parents. Haven't had any luck with that, either.

It's yer luuuuuucky day Kirsten!!.....

Dolores


Thank you! I am delighted to 'meet' you.