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Why coffee is better then women



 
 
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  #1  
Old October 12th 04, 05:45 AM
coffee waxwing
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Default Why coffee is better then women

WHY COFFEE IS BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. You don't have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.
2. Coffee doesn't complain when you put whipped cream in it.
3. A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.
4. You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee.
5. You can always warm coffee up.
6. Coffee comes with endless refills.
7. Coffee is cheaper.
8. You won't get arrested for ordering coffee at 3 AM.
9. Coffee never runs out.
10. Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning.
11. You can take black coffee home to meet your parents.
12. You can make coffee as sweet as you want.
13. You can smoke while drinking coffee.
14. You can put out a cigarette in a cup of coffee.
15. Coffee smells and tastes good.
16. You don't have to put vinegar in your coffee.
17. If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel.
18. You can always get fresh coffee.
19. You can turn the pot on, leave the room, and it'll be hot when you get
back.
20. They sell coffee at police stations.
21. You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee.
22. Coffee goes down easier.
23. If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn't put on weight.
24. No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee.
25. A big cup or small cup? It doesn't matter.
26. Your coffee doesn't talk to you.
27. Coffee smells good in the morning.
28. Coffee is good when it's cold too.
29. Coffee stains are easier to remove.
30. Coffee doesn't care when you dunk things in it.
31. Coffee doesn't care what kind of mood you're in.
32. Coffee doesn't shed.
33. Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less.
34. You can't get a cup of coffee pregnant by putting cream in it.
35. Coffee doesn't mind being ground.
36. No matter how bad coffee is, you can always make it better.
37. Coffee doesn't have a time of the month...it's good all the time.
38. When coffee gets old, you can throw it away.
39. When you have a coffee, you don't end up with a pube in the back of your
throat.
40. Coffee doesn't take up half your bed.
41. Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide to have a cup.
42. INSTANT COFFEE!
43. You can have an intelligent conversation with coffee.
44. It can take up to 2 weeks for coffee to grow mold.
45. Your coffee won't be jealous of a larger cup.
46. If you spill coffee on your keyboard, the keys don't stick.
47. Juan Valdez doesn't call his coffee "Bitch" and charge by the hour.
48. You always want coffee in the morning.
  #2  
Old October 12th 04, 11:28 AM
LaTreen Washington
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Default

49. Coffee doesn't reproduce, creating whiney little cups of expresso.

"coffee waxwing" wrote in message
m...
WHY COFFEE IS BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. You don't have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.
2. Coffee doesn't complain when you put whipped cream in it.
3. A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.
4. You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee.
5. You can always warm coffee up.
6. Coffee comes with endless refills.
7. Coffee is cheaper.
8. You won't get arrested for ordering coffee at 3 AM.
9. Coffee never runs out.
10. Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning.
11. You can take black coffee home to meet your parents.
12. You can make coffee as sweet as you want.
13. You can smoke while drinking coffee.
14. You can put out a cigarette in a cup of coffee.
15. Coffee smells and tastes good.
16. You don't have to put vinegar in your coffee.
17. If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel.
18. You can always get fresh coffee.
19. You can turn the pot on, leave the room, and it'll be hot when you

get
back.
20. They sell coffee at police stations.
21. You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee.
22. Coffee goes down easier.
23. If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn't put on weight.
24. No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee.
25. A big cup or small cup? It doesn't matter.
26. Your coffee doesn't talk to you.
27. Coffee smells good in the morning.
28. Coffee is good when it's cold too.
29. Coffee stains are easier to remove.
30. Coffee doesn't care when you dunk things in it.
31. Coffee doesn't care what kind of mood you're in.
32. Coffee doesn't shed.
33. Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less.
34. You can't get a cup of coffee pregnant by putting cream in it.
35. Coffee doesn't mind being ground.
36. No matter how bad coffee is, you can always make it better.
37. Coffee doesn't have a time of the month...it's good all the time.
38. When coffee gets old, you can throw it away.
39. When you have a coffee, you don't end up with a pube in the back of

your
throat.
40. Coffee doesn't take up half your bed.
41. Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide to have a cup.
42. INSTANT COFFEE!
43. You can have an intelligent conversation with coffee.
44. It can take up to 2 weeks for coffee to grow mold.
45. Your coffee won't be jealous of a larger cup.
46. If you spill coffee on your keyboard, the keys don't stick.
47. Juan Valdez doesn't call his coffee "Bitch" and charge by the hour.
48. You always want coffee in the morning.



  #3  
Old October 12th 04, 01:21 PM
Banty
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Default

In article , LaTreen Washington says...


::snip snark::

It must be slow over there on alt.support.childfree today....

Banty

  #4  
Old October 12th 04, 04:33 PM
Nan
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Posts: n/a
Default

On 12 Oct 2004 05:21:02 -0700, Banty
scribbled:

In article , LaTreen Washington says...


::snip snark::

It must be slow over there on alt.support.childfree today....

Banty


It must be. Treenie's taken to calling me racist and is now fully
quoting x-no-archive posts just for spite. Mean little bugger.

Nan

  #5  
Old October 12th 04, 04:33 PM
Nan
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Default

On Tue, 12 Oct 2004 06:28:35 -0400, "LaTreen Washington"
scribbled:

49. Coffee doesn't reproduce, creating whiney little cups of expresso.


A woman wouldn't state this Treenie. You're a guy!

Nan
  #6  
Old October 12th 04, 05:08 PM
Banty
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Posts: n/a
Default

In article , Nan says...

On 12 Oct 2004 05:21:02 -0700, Banty
scribbled:

In article , LaTreen Washington says...


::snip snark::

It must be slow over there on alt.support.childfree today....

Banty


It must be. Treenie's taken to calling me racist and is now fully
quoting x-no-archive posts just for spite. Mean little bugger.

Nan


I saw that. I suppose he or she wouldn't have liked Queen Latifah's skits on
SNL this week ;-)

Banty

  #7  
Old October 12th 04, 07:14 PM
newfy.1
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Posts: n/a
Default


"LaTreen Washington" wrote in
message ...
49. Coffee doesn't reproduce, creating whiney little cups of expresso.


It's only "expresso" if they serve it super fast.

JennP.


  #8  
Old October 12th 04, 09:35 PM
Amy
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Posts: n/a
Default

"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , LaTreen Washington says...


::snip snark::

It must be slow over there on alt.support.childfree today....

Banty

The hazards of an aging population....g

--
Amy,
Mum to Carlos born sleeping 20/11/02,
& Ana born screaming 30/06/04


 




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