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#1
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YOU CAN'T LOCK 12yos UP
I have never been to prison but it is a well known fact that those who
enter, always come out worse than when they went in. I am not suggesting that there are no crimes for children that warrant incarceration. Murder (Jamie Bulger case) - That is a prime example of where prison is needed. I feel in the case of those Brats, they should have thrown the key away, they did for Mira Hindley and Ian Brady. Spanking never did me any harm. It has never affected any of my family or friends. It depends who administers it. Do they love the child they are spanking? If the answer is 'yes' then spanking them as a last resort is not a problem because they won't go to far. Step parents usually grow to love the children they have taken on. Those who abuse children should be hanged. There is no excuse. I am about to take on three youngsters, 10, 6, 4 - The 10 year old rarely needs disciplining but when he does, he knows he deserves it. He knows he has pushed too far and he is warned long before the spanking happens. He has no problem with bending over and receiving a few hard whacks with the hand or paddle (light paddle, not a mega one). As for the six and four year old, they also know when they push too far, there mother will spank them. I rarely spank them as I am not their father or even yet their step-father. If I do spank them, their mother is always present and it is because she has asked me to spank them. I am an advocator of spanking as long as it is a last resort and is not abusive. It must hurt. Humiliation will be a natural part of it anyway. When a child gets to six, they usually become aware of their own sexuality and therefore start to hide their bodies. Having said that, both the six and four year old still run around naked once they have had a bath. The ten year old is more protective. If I smack, it is through whatever they are wearing at the time and it is appropriate for the offence. Usually no more than three, more often two. It has never affected my relationship with them negatively. They respect me and love me as I love them. They are not afraid of me because I am fair (so they say). I am also kind and generous with my time and energy. I play with them. Take a full and active interest in their activities, (sometimes at the expense of time with my partner and also at the expense of my work). The children and my fiancée come first. Work is second and very important because I need to provide. But, if the children need me, I'm there. I don't care how hard it is to get to them, I'll make it. They know I love them. They feel secure with me. Their mother (my fiancée) is very much pleased with the love and affection I offer them. I am currently back in the UK for a month and I can tell you; there is never a day that goes past that I don't miss the children. They, and my fiancée are my life. I would give everything for them but I will never spoil them. I love them all equally. The eldest's father cannot boast that, he treats the ten year old as the favourite and ignores the other two. The ten year old has watched as I have treated each child the same and he, and they respect that aspect of our relationship. If you love your children, natural parents or step parents, there is really nothing you would do to hurt them. Spanking is teaching them. When used appropriately and correctly, it can be very effective for most children. After-all, who is going to stand-by and watch your child (step or not) - any child, walk out in front of a car and not stop them. They need to understand there and then. Spanking them will do no permanent damage but it may teach them to remember to be careful. PRISON IS NOT THE ANSWER UNLESS THE CRIME FITS - THE PUNISHMENT SHOULD FIT THE CRIME. Remember with spanking: If you are not sure how hard you are spanking, or you don't trust yourself, spank bare-bottomed. You can then see what's happening. NEVER, NEVER SPANK IN ANGER - ONLY DESPERATION FOR THE CHILD TO LEARN. IF YOU ARE ANGRY, TAKE TEN MINUTES TO CALM DOWN. IF YOU HAVE TO SPANK IMMEDIATELY AND ARE ANGRY, LIMIT THE AMOUNT TO A NUMBER YOU KNOW WILL SERVE AS A LESSON, NOT ABUSE! STICK TO THAT NUMBER IN ANY SITUATION OF ANGER AND DON'T USE A CANE OR PADDLE IN ANGER. SPANK BARE-BOTTOMED (IF POSSIBLE) - THEN YOU WILL KNOW FOR SURE WHEN TO STOP. Bare-bottom spanking is not always necessary. But if you spank through two layers of clothes, make sure you spank with enough force to get the message across. Otherwise, the child will laugh at you every time thereafter. A spanking must hurt otherwise there is no point in administering it. DON'T BLISTER A CHILDS BOTTOM - IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IF FEELS LIKE TO RECEIVE A PADDLE HARD AND FOR A LONG TIME, GET YOUR PARTNER TO WHACK YOU. YOU'LL SOON LEARN HOW HARD TO SPANK CHILDREN. AS FOR UNRULY TEENAGERS - As long as they feel safe with you and don't feel like you're sexually abusing them, it is (in my opinion), okay to spank. I would make sure that your partner is with you. If you don't have a partner, ask a friend to come round. Men, use a woman as a witness, ladies, use either. EXPLAIN BEFORE YOU SPANK AND AFTER - The child needs to learn. While you are spanking them they will be thinking not just of the pain and humiliation but also, they will be thinking about what they did wrong. GIVE THEM A HUG - Once you have spanked them, if you give them 'cornertime', make sure you give them a hug before they leave the room (after cornertime). This is so important, they need to know that you forgive them and still love them. If they don't want a hug or back-chat you, put them back in the corner until their attitude changes. If they don't want a hug but their attitude is right, sit down with them and talk to them. Tell them 'I'm sorry I had to spank you but your father/stepfather/mother/stepmother/uncle/aunt, etc. need you to understand that what you did was very wrong. Do you understand?' Once they agree, hug them again (they will usually want one because they will feel guilty). Tell them it's all over now, you love them and you don't need to talk about it again (unless they repeat the same issue). ASK FOR UNDERSTANDING - The question: 'DO YOU UNDERSTAND?' Is probably (in my opinion), the most important. There is no point in spanking a child who doesn't understand why they are being spanked. Make sure you spend time explaining what you're going to do and why you're going to do it. MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SPANK UNTIL YOUR CHILD UNDERSTANDS! We all have a responsibility to protect children not matter who they are! It doesn't matter if you have children or not, protect them. But, don't poke your nose into another parents life. You may disagree with spanking, that's fine, you don't need to impose your view on others who haven't asked for it! Most children today realise a spanking is part of discipline. I wish it happened more in the UK, maybe then there would be less abusive children around. I guess each country has it's cross to bare, the UK's is the Education Secretary. Stupid policy not to teach children right and wrong. I can't believe that teachers are no longer allowed to tell a child what they did was wrong because they believe it mentally scars the child. I ask you, how else will a child learn. If little David is beating up a young man in the playground, do the teachers really have to go to David, not touch him. Stand at a non-threatening distance and say, "Now David, that's not a good idea, is it" or "David, do you think that is a good idea?" I wish we could send the Education Secretary back to school and he can see for himself what our country is becoming. TOO MUCH MOLLY-COT TELLING - One thing my fiancée's divorce has taught me, children are strong. Or they can be when encouraged in the right way. Telling a teacher they are not allowed to tell a child they are 'wrong' is pathetic. It's like telling a parent you mustn't smack a child. Admittedly, there are some children who don't respond to spanking, with those children, there are other methods like grounding or withdrawal of pocket-money (if that still exists) - As a child, I would have preferred a few hard spanks on my bare bottom than being grounded for a week or loosing my pocket-money. Ask ten children what they would prefer. It would be my guess that the majority would agree with me, as long as the spanking encompasses two things: 1. The said crime is paid for in full and never referred to again unless the same indiscretion is repeated. 2. The spanking is administered by someone who they feel secure with. This DOES NOT discount head teachers as long as the pupil's Form Teacher or the Guidance Councillor, or their parents if possible, are able to attend. In the case of parents, I feel they should be given the option of administering the punishment in a private room. But, if the head teacher has decided to spank the child, the parents must back them and must administer a spanking there and then and in front of the Form Teacher, Principle or Guidance Councillor. Parents should discuss (not in front of the child), what is appropriate. Oh dear, this seems to have turned into a bit of a lecture. (Well, not really a bit, A LOT). Sorry. This is really an incomplete rough guide that, IS ONLY MY OPINION - THIS IS NOT A DEFINITIVE GUIDE TO RAISING CHILDREN - I AM NOT IN THE MEDICAL OR TEACHING PROFESSION, I'm writing a book on Sir Winston Churchill, aimed at my (soon-to-be) step-children's age group. Also, I give lectures around the US and UK in educational establishments and private groups and corporates, on the subject of this great man who, in his own school life and youth, was subjected to some of the worst treatment and beatings ever. Churchill learnt a lot about how not to treat a child. Although unhappy at school and in his youth, at 21 years old, he graduated from Sandhurst Military Academy and, like my father (who was as unruly as Churchill), he matured greatly. The name Churchill is revered by every nation. It is my vocation to ensure that it continues to the next generation. Wish me luck, this year and next, I'm going to need it. I hope you weren't too bored with my post. It's a subject I have an opinion on but, you may disagree with me. However, it's only my opinion. I don't wish to offend and if I have, I'm sorry. Jackpot |
#2
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YOU CAN'T LOCK 12yos UP
Jackpot wrote:
I have never been to prison but it is a well known fact that those who enter, always come out worse than when they went in. I am not suggesting that there are no crimes for children that warrant incarceration. Murder (Jamie Bulger case) - That is a prime example of where prison is needed. I feel in the case of those Brats, they should have thrown the key away, they did for Mira Hindley and Ian Brady. Spanking never did me any harm. It has never affected any of my family or friends. It depends who administers it. Do they love the child they are spanking? If the answer is 'yes' then spanking them as a last resort is not a problem because they won't go to far. Step parents usually grow to love the children they have taken on. Those who abuse children should be hanged. There is no excuse. I am about to take on three youngsters, 10, 6, 4 - The 10 year old rarely needs disciplining but when he does, he knows he deserves it. He knows he has pushed too far and he is warned long before the spanking happens. He has no problem with bending over and receiving a few hard whacks with the hand or paddle (light paddle, not a mega one). As for the six and four year old, they also know when they push too far, there mother will spank them. I rarely spank them as I am not their father or even yet their step-father. If I do spank them, their mother is always present and it is because she has asked me to spank them. I am an advocator of spanking as long as it is a last resort and is not abusive. It must hurt. Humiliation will be a natural part of it anyway. When a child gets to six, they usually become aware of their own sexuality and therefore start to hide their bodies. Having said that, both the six and four year old still run around naked once they have had a bath. The ten year old is more protective. If I smack, it is through whatever they are wearing at the time and it is appropriate for the offence. Usually no more than three, more often two. It has never affected my relationship with them negatively. They respect me and love me as I love them. They are not afraid of me because I am fair (so they say). I am also kind and generous with my time and energy. I play with them. Take a full and active interest in their activities, (sometimes at the expense of time with my partner and also at the expense of my work). The children and my fiancée come first. Work is second and very important because I need to provide. But, if the children need me, I'm there. I don't care how hard it is to get to them, I'll make it. They know I love them. They feel secure with me. Their mother (my fiancée) is very much pleased with the love and affection I offer them. I am currently back in the UK for a month and I can tell you; there is never a day that goes past that I don't miss the children. They, and my fiancée are my life. I would give everything for them but I will never spoil them. I love them all equally. The eldest's father cannot boast that, he treats the ten year old as the favourite and ignores the other two. The ten year old has watched as I have treated each child the same and he, and they respect that aspect of our relationship. If you love your children, natural parents or step parents, there is really nothing you would do to hurt them. Spanking is teaching them. When used appropriately and correctly, it can be very effective for most children. After-all, who is going to stand-by and watch your child (step or not) - any child, walk out in front of a car and not stop them. They need to understand there and then. Spanking them will do no permanent damage but it may teach them to remember to be careful. PRISON IS NOT THE ANSWER UNLESS THE CRIME FITS - THE PUNISHMENT SHOULD FIT THE CRIME. Remember with spanking: If you are not sure how hard you are spanking, or you don't trust yourself, spank bare-bottomed. You can then see what's happening. NEVER, NEVER SPANK IN ANGER - ONLY DESPERATION FOR THE CHILD TO LEARN. IF YOU ARE ANGRY, TAKE TEN MINUTES TO CALM DOWN. IF YOU HAVE TO SPANK IMMEDIATELY AND ARE ANGRY, LIMIT THE AMOUNT TO A NUMBER YOU KNOW WILL SERVE AS A LESSON, NOT ABUSE! STICK TO THAT NUMBER IN ANY SITUATION OF ANGER AND DON'T USE A CANE OR PADDLE IN ANGER. SPANK BARE-BOTTOMED (IF POSSIBLE) - THEN YOU WILL KNOW FOR SURE WHEN TO STOP. Bare-bottom spanking is not always necessary. But if you spank through two layers of clothes, make sure you spank with enough force to get the message across. Otherwise, the child will laugh at you every time thereafter. A spanking must hurt otherwise there is no point in administering it. DON'T BLISTER A CHILDS BOTTOM - IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IF FEELS LIKE TO RECEIVE A PADDLE HARD AND FOR A LONG TIME, GET YOUR PARTNER TO WHACK YOU. YOU'LL SOON LEARN HOW HARD TO SPANK CHILDREN. AS FOR UNRULY TEENAGERS - As long as they feel safe with you and don't feel like you're sexually abusing them, it is (in my opinion), okay to spank. I would make sure that your partner is with you. If you don't have a partner, ask a friend to come round. Men, use a woman as a witness, ladies, use either. EXPLAIN BEFORE YOU SPANK AND AFTER - The child needs to learn. While you are spanking them they will be thinking not just of the pain and humiliation but also, they will be thinking about what they did wrong. GIVE THEM A HUG - Once you have spanked them, if you give them 'cornertime', make sure you give them a hug before they leave the room (after cornertime). This is so important, they need to know that you forgive them and still love them. If they don't want a hug or back-chat you, put them back in the corner until their attitude changes. If they don't want a hug but their attitude is right, sit down with them and talk to them. Tell them 'I'm sorry I had to spank you but your father/stepfather/mother/stepmother/uncle/aunt, etc. need you to understand that what you did was very wrong. Do you understand?' Once they agree, hug them again (they will usually want one because they will feel guilty). Tell them it's all over now, you love them and you don't need to talk about it again (unless they repeat the same issue). ASK FOR UNDERSTANDING - The question: 'DO YOU UNDERSTAND?' Is probably (in my opinion), the most important. There is no point in spanking a child who doesn't understand why they are being spanked. Make sure you spend time explaining what you're going to do and why you're going to do it. MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SPANK UNTIL YOUR CHILD UNDERSTANDS! We all have a responsibility to protect children not matter who they are! It doesn't matter if you have children or not, protect them. But, don't poke your nose into another parents life. You may disagree with spanking, that's fine, you don't need to impose your view on others who haven't asked for it! Most children today realise a spanking is part of discipline. I wish it happened more in the UK, maybe then there would be less abusive children around. I guess each country has it's cross to bare, the UK's is the Education Secretary. Stupid policy not to teach children right and wrong. I can't believe that teachers are no longer allowed to tell a child what they did was wrong because they believe it mentally scars the child. I ask you, how else will a child learn. If little David is beating up a young man in the playground, do the teachers really have to go to David, not touch him. Stand at a non-threatening distance and say, "Now David, that's not a good idea, is it" or "David, do you think that is a good idea?" I wish we could send the Education Secretary back to school and he can see for himself what our country is becoming. TOO MUCH MOLLY-COT TELLING - One thing my fiancée's divorce has taught me, children are strong. Or they can be when encouraged in the right way. Telling a teacher they are not allowed to tell a child they are 'wrong' is pathetic. It's like telling a parent you mustn't smack a child. Admittedly, there are some children who don't respond to spanking, with those children, there are other methods like grounding or withdrawal of pocket-money (if that still exists) - As a child, I would have preferred a few hard spanks on my bare bottom than being grounded for a week or loosing my pocket-money. Ask ten children what they would prefer. It would be my guess that the majority would agree with me, as long as the spanking encompasses two things: 1. The said crime is paid for in full and never referred to again unless the same indiscretion is repeated. 2. The spanking is administered by someone who they feel secure with. This DOES NOT discount head teachers as long as the pupil's Form Teacher or the Guidance Councillor, or their parents if possible, are able to attend. In the case of parents, I feel they should be given the option of administering the punishment in a private room. But, if the head teacher has decided to spank the child, the parents must back them and must administer a spanking there and then and in front of the Form Teacher, Principle or Guidance Councillor. Parents should discuss (not in front of the child), what is appropriate. Oh dear, this seems to have turned into a bit of a lecture. (Well, not really a bit, A LOT). Sorry. This is really an incomplete rough guide that, IS ONLY MY OPINION - THIS IS NOT A DEFINITIVE GUIDE TO RAISING CHILDREN - I AM NOT IN THE MEDICAL OR TEACHING PROFESSION, I'm writing a book on Sir Winston Churchill, aimed at my (soon-to-be) step-children's age group. Also, I give lectures around the US and UK in educational establishments and private groups and corporates, on the subject of this great man who, in his own school life and youth, was subjected to some of the worst treatment and beatings ever. Churchill learnt a lot about how not to treat a child. Although unhappy at school and in his youth, at 21 years old, he graduated from Sandhurst Military Academy and, like my father (who was as unruly as Churchill), he matured greatly. The name Churchill is revered by every nation. It is my vocation to ensure that it continues to the next generation. Wish me luck, this year and next, I'm going to need it. I hope you weren't too bored with my post. It's a subject I have an opinion on but, you may disagree with me. However, it's only my opinion. I don't wish to offend and if I have, I'm sorry. Jackpot Very interesting. 0:- -- "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin (or someone else) |
#3
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YOU CAN'T LOCK 12yos UP
Jackpot:
It seems heartfelt and thought out. Bravo! The idiots now say that teachers must not ever tell kids they are wrong for fear it will harm their psyche? This kind of thinking (and laws) seems to happen by DEGREES. It seems that democracy suffers from many of the same ills over time that doing things "by committee" bring about. If democratic people could support ONLY the fundamentals, things might be OK, but democracy is vulnerable to every bad idea that SOUNDS GOOD to half the people. And when democratic citizens become COWED to a certain point, government leads them around like a cow with a ring in their nose. Socialism seems to be creeping into everything and citizens consent by remaining silent. What few citizens take a position in opposition to the bureaucratic steam roller are generally just rolled flat. The Movie "Brazil", Franz Kafka's "The Trial" and of course Orwell's 1984 all seemed fantastic, but many of the same things the West complained about in our former enemies are now becoming familiar parts of our lives in the West! Parents have been terrorized by the Child Protective agencies. Children actually threaten their own parents with comments about calling the Child Protection agencies. Not knowing what a nightmare that can truly bring about, some kids engage in this type of brinksmanship. Jackpot wrote: I have never been to prison but it is a well known fact that those who enter, always come out worse than when they went in. I am not suggesting that there are no crimes for children that warrant incarceration. Murder (Jamie Bulger case) - That is a prime example of where prison is needed. I feel in the case of those Brats, they should have thrown the key away, they did for Mira Hindley and Ian Brady. Spanking never did me any harm. It has never affected any of my family or friends. It depends who administers it. Do they love the child they are spanking? If the answer is 'yes' then spanking them as a last resort is not a problem because they won't go to far. Step parents usually grow to love the children they have taken on. Those who abuse children should be hanged. There is no excuse. I am about to take on three youngsters, 10, 6, 4 - The 10 year old rarely needs disciplining but when he does, he knows he deserves it. He knows he has pushed too far and he is warned long before the spanking happens. He has no problem with bending over and receiving a few hard whacks with the hand or paddle (light paddle, not a mega one). As for the six and four year old, they also know when they push too far, there mother will spank them. I rarely spank them as I am not their father or even yet their step-father. If I do spank them, their mother is always present and it is because she has asked me to spank them. I am an advocator of spanking as long as it is a last resort and is not abusive. It must hurt. Humiliation will be a natural part of it anyway. When a child gets to six, they usually become aware of their own sexuality and therefore start to hide their bodies. Having said that, both the six and four year old still run around naked once they have had a bath. The ten year old is more protective. If I smack, it is through whatever they are wearing at the time and it is appropriate for the offence. Usually no more than three, more often two. It has never affected my relationship with them negatively. They respect me and love me as I love them. They are not afraid of me because I am fair (so they say). I am also kind and generous with my time and energy. I play with them. Take a full and active interest in their activities, (sometimes at the expense of time with my partner and also at the expense of my work). The children and my fiancée come first. Work is second and very important because I need to provide. But, if the children need me, I'm there. I don't care how hard it is to get to them, I'll make it. They know I love them. They feel secure with me. Their mother (my fiancée) is very much pleased with the love and affection I offer them. I am currently back in the UK for a month and I can tell you; there is never a day that goes past that I don't miss the children. They, and my fiancée are my life. I would give everything for them but I will never spoil them. I love them all equally. The eldest's father cannot boast that, he treats the ten year old as the favourite and ignores the other two. The ten year old has watched as I have treated each child the same and he, and they respect that aspect of our relationship. If you love your children, natural parents or step parents, there is really nothing you would do to hurt them. Spanking is teaching them. When used appropriately and correctly, it can be very effective for most children. After-all, who is going to stand-by and watch your child (step or not) - any child, walk out in front of a car and not stop them. They need to understand there and then. Spanking them will do no permanent damage but it may teach them to remember to be careful. PRISON IS NOT THE ANSWER UNLESS THE CRIME FITS - THE PUNISHMENT SHOULD FIT THE CRIME. Remember with spanking: If you are not sure how hard you are spanking, or you don't trust yourself, spank bare-bottomed. You can then see what's happening. NEVER, NEVER SPANK IN ANGER - ONLY DESPERATION FOR THE CHILD TO LEARN. IF YOU ARE ANGRY, TAKE TEN MINUTES TO CALM DOWN. IF YOU HAVE TO SPANK IMMEDIATELY AND ARE ANGRY, LIMIT THE AMOUNT TO A NUMBER YOU KNOW WILL SERVE AS A LESSON, NOT ABUSE! STICK TO THAT NUMBER IN ANY SITUATION OF ANGER AND DON'T USE A CANE OR PADDLE IN ANGER. SPANK BARE-BOTTOMED (IF POSSIBLE) - THEN YOU WILL KNOW FOR SURE WHEN TO STOP. Bare-bottom spanking is not always necessary. But if you spank through two layers of clothes, make sure you spank with enough force to get the message across. Otherwise, the child will laugh at you every time thereafter. A spanking must hurt otherwise there is no point in administering it. DON'T BLISTER A CHILDS BOTTOM - IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IF FEELS LIKE TO RECEIVE A PADDLE HARD AND FOR A LONG TIME, GET YOUR PARTNER TO WHACK YOU. YOU'LL SOON LEARN HOW HARD TO SPANK CHILDREN. AS FOR UNRULY TEENAGERS - As long as they feel safe with you and don't feel like you're sexually abusing them, it is (in my opinion), okay to spank. I would make sure that your partner is with you. If you don't have a partner, ask a friend to come round. Men, use a woman as a witness, ladies, use either. EXPLAIN BEFORE YOU SPANK AND AFTER - The child needs to learn. While you are spanking them they will be thinking not just of the pain and humiliation but also, they will be thinking about what they did wrong. GIVE THEM A HUG - Once you have spanked them, if you give them 'cornertime', make sure you give them a hug before they leave the room (after cornertime). This is so important, they need to know that you forgive them and still love them. If they don't want a hug or back-chat you, put them back in the corner until their attitude changes. If they don't want a hug but their attitude is right, sit down with them and talk to them. Tell them 'I'm sorry I had to spank you but your father/stepfather/mother/stepmother/uncle/aunt, etc. need you to understand that what you did was very wrong. Do you understand?' Once they agree, hug them again (they will usually want one because they will feel guilty). Tell them it's all over now, you love them and you don't need to talk about it again (unless they repeat the same issue). ASK FOR UNDERSTANDING - The question: 'DO YOU UNDERSTAND?' Is probably (in my opinion), the most important. There is no point in spanking a child who doesn't understand why they are being spanked. Make sure you spend time explaining what you're going to do and why you're going to do it. MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SPANK UNTIL YOUR CHILD UNDERSTANDS! We all have a responsibility to protect children not matter who they are! It doesn't matter if you have children or not, protect them. But, don't poke your nose into another parents life. You may disagree with spanking, that's fine, you don't need to impose your view on others who haven't asked for it! Most children today realise a spanking is part of discipline. I wish it happened more in the UK, maybe then there would be less abusive children around. I guess each country has it's cross to bare, the UK's is the Education Secretary. Stupid policy not to teach children right and wrong. I can't believe that teachers are no longer allowed to tell a child what they did was wrong because they believe it mentally scars the child. I ask you, how else will a child learn. If little David is beating up a young man in the playground, do the teachers really have to go to David, not touch him. Stand at a non-threatening distance and say, "Now David, that's not a good idea, is it" or "David, do you think that is a good idea?" I wish we could send the Education Secretary back to school and he can see for himself what our country is becoming. TOO MUCH MOLLY-COT TELLING - One thing my fiancée's divorce has taught me, children are strong. Or they can be when encouraged in the right way. Telling a teacher they are not allowed to tell a child they are 'wrong' is pathetic. It's like telling a parent you mustn't smack a child. Admittedly, there are some children who don't respond to spanking, with those children, there are other methods like grounding or withdrawal of pocket-money (if that still exists) - As a child, I would have preferred a few hard spanks on my bare bottom than being grounded for a week or loosing my pocket-money. Ask ten children what they would prefer. It would be my guess that the majority would agree with me, as long as the spanking encompasses two things: 1. The said crime is paid for in full and never referred to again unless the same indiscretion is repeated. 2. The spanking is administered by someone who they feel secure with. This DOES NOT discount head teachers as long as the pupil's Form Teacher or the Guidance Councillor, or their parents if possible, are able to attend. In the case of parents, I feel they should be given the option of administering the punishment in a private room. But, if the head teacher has decided to spank the child, the parents must back them and must administer a spanking there and then and in front of the Form Teacher, Principle or Guidance Councillor. Parents should discuss (not in front of the child), what is appropriate. Oh dear, this seems to have turned into a bit of a lecture. (Well, not really a bit, A LOT). Sorry. This is really an incomplete rough guide that, IS ONLY MY OPINION - THIS IS NOT A DEFINITIVE GUIDE TO RAISING CHILDREN - I AM NOT IN THE MEDICAL OR TEACHING PROFESSION, I'm writing a book on Sir Winston Churchill, aimed at my (soon-to-be) step-children's age group. Also, I give lectures around the US and UK in educational establishments and private groups and corporates, on the subject of this great man who, in his own school life and youth, was subjected to some of the worst treatment and beatings ever. Churchill learnt a lot about how not to treat a child. Although unhappy at school and in his youth, at 21 years old, he graduated from Sandhurst Military Academy and, like my father (who was as unruly as Churchill), he matured greatly. The name Churchill is revered by every nation. It is my vocation to ensure that it continues to the next generation. Wish me luck, this year and next, I'm going to need it. I hope you weren't too bored with my post. It's a subject I have an opinion on but, you may disagree with me. However, it's only my opinion. I don't wish to offend and if I have, I'm sorry. Jackpot |
#4
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YOU CAN'T LOCK 12yos UP
Greegor wrote: Jackpot: It seems heartfelt and thought out. Bravo! The idiots now say that teachers must not ever tell kids they are wrong for fear it will harm their psyche? This kind of thinking (and laws) seems to happen by DEGREES. It seems that democracy suffers from many of the same ills over time that doing things "by committee" bring about. If democratic people could support ONLY the fundamentals, things might be OK, but democracy is vulnerable to every bad idea that SOUNDS GOOD to half the people. And when democratic citizens become COWED to a certain point, government leads them around like a cow with a ring in their nose. Socialism seems to be creeping into everything and citizens consent by remaining silent. What few citizens take a position in opposition to the bureaucratic steam roller are generally just rolled flat. The Movie "Brazil", Franz Kafka's "The Trial" and of course Orwell's 1984 all seemed fantastic, but many of the same things the West complained about in our former enemies are now becoming familiar parts of our lives in the West! Parents have been terrorized by the Child Protective agencies. Children actually threaten their own parents with comments about calling the Child Protection agencies. Not knowing what a nightmare that can truly bring about, some kids engage in this type of brinksmanship. Jackpot wrote: I have never been to prison but it is a well known fact that those who enter, always come out worse than when they went in. I am not suggesting that there are no crimes for children that warrant incarceration. Murder (Jamie Bulger case) - That is a prime example of where prison is needed. I feel in the case of those Brats, they should have thrown the key away, they did for Mira Hindley and Ian Brady. Spanking never did me any harm. It has never affected any of my family or friends. It depends who administers it. Do they love the child they are spanking? If the answer is 'yes' then spanking them as a last resort is not a problem because they won't go to far. Step parents usually grow to love the children they have taken on. Those who abuse children should be hanged. There is no excuse. I am about to take on three youngsters, 10, 6, 4 - The 10 year old rarely needs disciplining but when he does, he knows he deserves it. He knows he has pushed too far and he is warned long before the spanking happens. He has no problem with bending over and receiving a few hard whacks with the hand or paddle (light paddle, not a mega one). As for the six and four year old, they also know when they push too far, there mother will spank them. I rarely spank them as I am not their father or even yet their step-father. If I do spank them, their mother is always present and it is because she has asked me to spank them. I am an advocator of spanking as long as it is a last resort and is not abusive. It must hurt. Humiliation will be a natural part of it anyway. When a child gets to six, they usually become aware of their own sexuality and therefore start to hide their bodies. Having said that, both the six and four year old still run around naked once they have had a bath. The ten year old is more protective. If I smack, it is through whatever they are wearing at the time and it is appropriate for the offence. Usually no more than three, more often two. It has never affected my relationship with them negatively. They respect me and love me as I love them. They are not afraid of me because I am fair (so they say). I am also kind and generous with my time and energy. I play with them. Take a full and active interest in their activities, (sometimes at the expense of time with my partner and also at the expense of my work). The children and my fiancée come first. Work is second and very important because I need to provide. But, if the children need me, I'm there. I don't care how hard it is to get to them, I'll make it. They know I love them. They feel secure with me. Their mother (my fiancée) is very much pleased with the love and affection I offer them. I am currently back in the UK for a month and I can tell you; there is never a day that goes past that I don't miss the children. They, and my fiancée are my life. I would give everything for them but I will never spoil them. I love them all equally. The eldest's father cannot boast that, he treats the ten year old as the favourite and ignores the other two. The ten year old has watched as I have treated each child the same and he, and they respect that aspect of our relationship. If you love your children, natural parents or step parents, there is really nothing you would do to hurt them. Spanking is teaching them. When used appropriately and correctly, it can be very effective for most children. After-all, who is going to stand-by and watch your child (step or not) - any child, walk out in front of a car and not stop them. They need to understand there and then. Spanking them will do no permanent damage but it may teach them to remember to be careful. PRISON IS NOT THE ANSWER UNLESS THE CRIME FITS - THE PUNISHMENT SHOULD FIT THE CRIME. Remember with spanking: If you are not sure how hard you are spanking, or you don't trust yourself, spank bare-bottomed. You can then see what's happening. NEVER, NEVER SPANK IN ANGER - ONLY DESPERATION FOR THE CHILD TO LEARN. IF YOU ARE ANGRY, TAKE TEN MINUTES TO CALM DOWN. IF YOU HAVE TO SPANK IMMEDIATELY AND ARE ANGRY, LIMIT THE AMOUNT TO A NUMBER YOU KNOW WILL SERVE AS A LESSON, NOT ABUSE! STICK TO THAT NUMBER IN ANY SITUATION OF ANGER AND DON'T USE A CANE OR PADDLE IN ANGER. SPANK BARE-BOTTOMED (IF POSSIBLE) - THEN YOU WILL KNOW FOR SURE WHEN TO STOP. Bare-bottom spanking is not always necessary. But if you spank through two layers of clothes, make sure you spank with enough force to get the message across. Otherwise, the child will laugh at you every time thereafter. A spanking must hurt otherwise there is no point in administering it. DON'T BLISTER A CHILDS BOTTOM - IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IF FEELS LIKE TO RECEIVE A PADDLE HARD AND FOR A LONG TIME, GET YOUR PARTNER TO WHACK YOU. YOU'LL SOON LEARN HOW HARD TO SPANK CHILDREN. AS FOR UNRULY TEENAGERS - As long as they feel safe with you and don't feel like you're sexually abusing them, it is (in my opinion), okay to spank. I would make sure that your partner is with you. If you don't have a partner, ask a friend to come round. Men, use a woman as a witness, ladies, use either. EXPLAIN BEFORE YOU SPANK AND AFTER - The child needs to learn. While you are spanking them they will be thinking not just of the pain and humiliation but also, they will be thinking about what they did wrong. GIVE THEM A HUG - Once you have spanked them, if you give them 'cornertime', make sure you give them a hug before they leave the room (after cornertime). This is so important, they need to know that you forgive them and still love them. If they don't want a hug or back-chat you, put them back in the corner until their attitude changes. If they don't want a hug but their attitude is right, sit down with them and talk to them. Tell them 'I'm sorry I had to spank you but your father/stepfather/mother/stepmother/uncle/aunt, etc. need you to understand that what you did was very wrong. Do you understand?' Once they agree, hug them again (they will usually want one because they will feel guilty). Tell them it's all over now, you love them and you don't need to talk about it again (unless they repeat the same issue). ASK FOR UNDERSTANDING - The question: 'DO YOU UNDERSTAND?' Is probably (in my opinion), the most important. There is no point in spanking a child who doesn't understand why they are being spanked. Make sure you spend time explaining what you're going to do and why you're going to do it. MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SPANK UNTIL YOUR CHILD UNDERSTANDS! We all have a responsibility to protect children not matter who they are! It doesn't matter if you have children or not, protect them. But, don't poke your nose into another parents life. You may disagree with spanking, that's fine, you don't need to impose your view on others who haven't asked for it! Most children today realise a spanking is part of discipline. I wish it happened more in the UK, maybe then there would be less abusive children around. I guess each country has it's cross to bare, the UK's is the Education Secretary. Stupid policy not to teach children right and wrong. I can't believe that teachers are no longer allowed to tell a child what they did was wrong because they believe it mentally scars the child. I ask you, how else will a child learn. If little David is beating up a young man in the playground, do the teachers really have to go to David, not touch him. Stand at a non-threatening distance and say, "Now David, that's not a good idea, is it" or "David, do you think that is a good idea?" I wish we could send the Education Secretary back to school and he can see for himself what our country is becoming. TOO MUCH MOLLY-COT TELLING - One thing my fiancée's divorce has taught me, children are strong. Or they can be when encouraged in the right way. Telling a teacher they are not allowed to tell a child they are 'wrong' is pathetic. It's like telling a parent you mustn't smack a child. Admittedly, there are some children who don't respond to spanking, with those children, there are other methods like grounding or withdrawal of pocket-money (if that still exists) - As a child, I would have preferred a few hard spanks on my bare bottom than being grounded for a week or loosing my pocket-money. Ask ten children what they would prefer. It would be my guess that the majority would agree with me, as long as the spanking encompasses two things: 1. The said crime is paid for in full and never referred to again unless the same indiscretion is repeated. 2. The spanking is administered by someone who they feel secure with. This DOES NOT discount head teachers as long as the pupil's Form Teacher or the Guidance Councillor, or their parents if possible, are able to attend. In the case of parents, I feel they should be given the option of administering the punishment in a private room. But, if the head teacher has decided to spank the child, the parents must back them and must administer a spanking there and then and in front of the Form Teacher, Principle or Guidance Councillor. Parents should discuss (not in front of the child), what is appropriate. Oh dear, this seems to have turned into a bit of a lecture. (Well, not really a bit, A LOT). Sorry. This is really an incomplete rough guide that, IS ONLY MY OPINION - THIS IS NOT A DEFINITIVE GUIDE TO RAISING CHILDREN - I AM NOT IN THE MEDICAL OR TEACHING PROFESSION, I'm writing a book on Sir Winston Churchill, aimed at my (soon-to-be) step-children's age group. Also, I give lectures around the US and UK in educational establishments and private groups and corporates, on the subject of this great man who, in his own school life and youth, was subjected to some of the worst treatment and beatings ever. Churchill learnt a lot about how not to treat a child. Although unhappy at school and in his youth, at 21 years old, he graduated from Sandhurst Military Academy and, like my father (who was as unruly as Churchill), he matured greatly. The name Churchill is revered by every nation. It is my vocation to ensure that it continues to the next generation. Wish me luck, this year and next, I'm going to need it. I hope you weren't too bored with my post. It's a subject I have an opinion on but, you may disagree with me. However, it's only my opinion. I don't wish to offend and if I have, I'm sorry. Jackpot Comment on that Jackpot post: No child should be spanked, period. Is whipping your kid with a belt going to really teach him? No, it's going to leave lasting physical trauma in that child all the way into adulthood from being abused. I called the Child Protection agencies on parents who I see abuse there children, I don't care it's hand spanking or hitting them with a belt, it's still abuse. Child Protection agencies are there for a reason, to stop child abuse. The only people I hear criticize them are usually parents who abuse and have lost there children. They are the same ones who criticize police, prison personnel or who ever is in authority because they can't seem to see what they are doing is WRONG. Wife/child beaters and child molesters should be tortured and put in camps to have medical experiments preformed on them. They are scum of society |
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YOU CAN'T LOCK 12yos UP
Comment on that Jackpot post:
No child should be spanked, period. Is whipping your kid with a belt going to really teach him? No, it's going to leave lasting physical trauma in that child all the way into adulthood from being abused. I called the Child Protection agencies on parents who I see abuse there children, I don't care it's hand spanking or hitting them with a belt, it's still abuse. Child Protection agencies are there for a reason, to stop child abuse. The only people I hear criticize them are usually parents who abuse and have lost there children. They are the same ones who criticize police, prison personnel or who ever is in authority because they can't seem to see what they are doing is WRONG. Wife/child beaters and child molesters should be tortured and put in camps to have medical experiments preformed on them. They are scum of society Comment on that Jackpot post: No child should be spanked, period. Is whipping your kid with a belt going to really teach him? No, it's going to leave lasting physical trauma in that child all the way into adulthood from being abused. I called the Child Protection agencies on parents who I see abuse there children, I don't care it's hand spanking or hitting them with a belt, it's still abuse. Child Protection agencies are there for a reason, to stop child abuse. The only people I hear criticize them are usually parents who abuse and have lost there children. They are the same ones who criticize police, prison personnel or who ever is in authority because they can't seem to see what they are doing is WRONG. Wife/child beaters and child molesters should be tortured and put in camps to have medical experiments preformed on them. They are scum of society |
#6
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YOU CAN'T LOCK 12yos UP
When cutting from other people or identities and
pasting as Chuck, please be more careful not to paste it twice. It ruins the whole illusion. |
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