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#1
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Met with lawyer
The summary of his advice was that there wasn't much that could be done to prevent the State from meddling in our affairs, although he told me he would look into it and get back to me in a week. He told me that even if we set up "shared placement" (the Rhode Island equivalent of "joint physical custody"), that could change five years down the road with a change in circumstance (like my GF and I breaking up). Not much to be done but "throw caution to the wind" and "trust in the LOVE!" I had thought that the court tended to keep existing custody arrangements intact unless presented with a GOOD reason to change them (i.e. someone gets busted for drugs, etc). I had thought that if we "never went to the court and worked things out between us", one parent could always visit the family court twenty years later and demand "back support" from a judge who had no knowledge of an unofficial agreement -- and no reason to accept it? What will my sons do? What will I tell them when they come of age? Are fathers forced to keep their mouths shut and let their sons be tricked into dangerous situations if they ever want to see grandchildren? Is there NO way for a man to prevent a lazy wretch from posing as someone worthwhile and then draining his life's blood for two decades? When will the courts stop awarding the lion's share to those who do the LEAST amount of work and take on the LEAST amount of responsibility? When will we finally, finally bleach the parasites and scum from the face of the earth? When will we know the satisfaction of watching them tremble in fear as they know that the gig is up and they are about to get what is coming to them? When? There is no trusting the State in this matter, they have too much invested in keeping people adversarial and whispering in the woman's ear about how greatly she can profit from their Devil's Bargains. CSE laughs like the Devil it is and throws more pitch on the fire with its black fork. THEY ARE *ABUSERS*!!! Why does no one else *SEE* this?!? I have my son with me 50% of the time and yet I must pay 90% of the standard (overblown to begin with) CS order. My ex sits and sits and sits and sits on her fat, lazy ass and has no intention of budging until she absolutely HAS to. Oh, but she is doing me a *favor* by *allowing* me to see my son! And she isn't even the Custodial Parent! Disgusted, - Ron ^*^ |
#2
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"Werebat" wrote in message news:jln_d.64727$7z6.63637@lakeread04... The summary of his advice was that there wasn't much that could be done to prevent the State from meddling in our affairs, although he told me he would look into it and get back to me in a week. He told me that even if we set up "shared placement" (the Rhode Island equivalent of "joint physical custody"), that could change five years down the road with a change in circumstance (like my GF and I breaking up). Not much to be done but "throw caution to the wind" and "trust in the LOVE!" I had thought that the court tended to keep existing custody arrangements intact unless presented with a GOOD reason to change them (i.e. someone gets busted for drugs, etc). I had thought that if we "never went to the court and worked things out between us", one parent could always visit the family court twenty years later and demand "back support" from a judge who had no knowledge of an unofficial agreement -- and no reason to accept it? What will my sons do? What will I tell them when they come of age? Are fathers forced to keep their mouths shut and let their sons be tricked into dangerous situations if they ever want to see grandchildren? Is there NO way for a man to prevent a lazy wretch from posing as someone worthwhile and then draining his life's blood for two decades? I'm NOT going to keep my mouth shut. When my son is old enough I am going to tell him exactly what is going on. I will not stand by and let him get suckered into this EVIL system of legalized slavery. I am also going to show my daughter how her mother has been leeching off of everybody that will allow it. Of course I can't come out and say that to her, but I will make it very obvious just by the facts. Today belongs to her mother...tomorrow is mine! When will the courts stop awarding the lion's share to those who do the LEAST amount of work and take on the LEAST amount of responsibility? When will we finally, finally bleach the parasites and scum from the face of the earth? When will we know the satisfaction of watching them tremble in fear as they know that the gig is up and they are about to get what is coming to them? When? We may never know that satisfaction, but I'd settle for just feeling like there is some kind of fairness in the system where I don't feel like missing a day of work could result in jail while the lazy wench is not even working. There is no trusting the State in this matter, they have too much invested in keeping people adversarial and whispering in the woman's ear about how greatly she can profit from their Devil's Bargains. CSE laughs like the Devil it is and throws more pitch on the fire with its black fork. THEY ARE *ABUSERS*!!! Why does no one else *SEE* this?!? I see it every day of my life. I see how a government "family" agency has been corrupted so that they are like mafia enforcers selling protection to men. Of course, like any thug, they get a cut. I have my son with me 50% of the time and yet I must pay 90% of the standard (overblown to begin with) CS order. My ex sits and sits and sits and sits on her fat, lazy ass and has no intention of budging until she absolutely HAS to. Oh, but she is doing me a *favor* by *allowing* me to see my son! And she isn't even the Custodial Parent! I see this like any other racket...Of course the people reaping the rewards are going to set it up so that it stays in their control. Your kids and freedom are held hostage until you pay the ransom. Disgusted, - Ron ^*^ |
#3
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What did I tell you. Least your attorney has some sense. And without a
marriage license... When people get too emotional about a subject they tend to loose subjectivity. I mean "When will we finally, finally bleach the parasites and scum from the face of the earth"? Or "watch them tremble" You don't own a secret weapon of mass destruction do you? You sound like one of those maniacal anti-heroes from a bad 50s B movie. I don't understand why you give yourself ulcers over this. You can't control how your ex is. Who cares if she is worthless. You can't change it. You can, however, control the relationship you have with your son. If he sees you in this state, or hears you bad mouth his mother then your relationship will surely suffer. She is not doing you a 'favor'. You have rights; pure and simple. The parent with whom the child resides have the most responsibility, by far. The courts do not award the lion's share to the parent that accomplishing the least. Rather to the parent with whom the child resides most of the time. If your son resides with her then she does have the lion's share of the responsibility for him. You say 50%. Is that literally? Florida must be pretty soft on CSE. A friend from Indiana, were I grew up, said they are very strict there. You obviously feel Rhode Island takes CSE seriously And see, what did I tell ya about trusting in love? You had to pay an attorney fee to hear it. I told you previously, pro bono. Bill |
#4
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Don't take this the wrong way, but why did you get her pregnant if you
hadn't cleared this up? "Werebat" wrote in message news:jln_d.64727$7z6.63637@lakeread04... The summary of his advice was that there wasn't much that could be done to prevent the State from meddling in our affairs, although he told me he would look into it and get back to me in a week. He told me that even if we set up "shared placement" (the Rhode Island equivalent of "joint physical custody"), that could change five years down the road with a change in circumstance (like my GF and I breaking up). Not much to be done but "throw caution to the wind" and "trust in the LOVE!" I had thought that the court tended to keep existing custody arrangements intact unless presented with a GOOD reason to change them (i.e. someone gets busted for drugs, etc). I had thought that if we "never went to the court and worked things out between us", one parent could always visit the family court twenty years later and demand "back support" from a judge who had no knowledge of an unofficial agreement -- and no reason to accept it? What will my sons do? What will I tell them when they come of age? Are fathers forced to keep their mouths shut and let their sons be tricked into dangerous situations if they ever want to see grandchildren? Is there NO way for a man to prevent a lazy wretch from posing as someone worthwhile and then draining his life's blood for two decades? When will the courts stop awarding the lion's share to those who do the LEAST amount of work and take on the LEAST amount of responsibility? When will we finally, finally bleach the parasites and scum from the face of the earth? When will we know the satisfaction of watching them tremble in fear as they know that the gig is up and they are about to get what is coming to them? When? There is no trusting the State in this matter, they have too much invested in keeping people adversarial and whispering in the woman's ear about how greatly she can profit from their Devil's Bargains. CSE laughs like the Devil it is and throws more pitch on the fire with its black fork. THEY ARE *ABUSERS*!!! Why does no one else *SEE* this?!? I have my son with me 50% of the time and yet I must pay 90% of the standard (overblown to begin with) CS order. My ex sits and sits and sits and sits on her fat, lazy ass and has no intention of budging until she absolutely HAS to. Oh, but she is doing me a *favor* by *allowing* me to see my son! And she isn't even the Custodial Parent! Disgusted, - Ron ^*^ |
#5
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William Barger wrote: What did I tell you. Least your attorney has some sense. And without a marriage license... When people get too emotional about a subject they tend to loose subjectivity. I mean "When will we finally, finally bleach the parasites and scum from the face of the earth"? Or "watch them tremble" You don't own a secret weapon of mass destruction do you? You sound like one of those maniacal anti-heroes from a bad 50s B movie. Or maybe Nat Turner. I don't understand why you give yourself ulcers over this. You can't control how your ex is. Who cares if she is worthless. You can't change it. True that. I no longer care about what she does with her life other than how it affects my son. But Papa Government won't let me stop being affected by her slothful indolence. You can, however, control the relationship you have with your son. If he sees you in this state, or hears you bad mouth his mother then your relationship will surely suffer. She is not doing you a 'favor'. You have rights; pure and simple. Then why was I jailed for two days when I never missed a payment of C$? Why did they let someone in prison with me post bail and leave the night they arrived WHEN THEY HAD *STABBED* SOMEONE, but not me? You have this funny definition of the word "rights". The parent with whom the child resides have the most responsibility, by far. The courts do not award the lion's share to the parent that accomplishing the least. Rather to the parent with whom the child resides most of the time. If your son resides with her then she does have the lion's share of the responsibility for him. You say 50%. Is that literally? Yes, asshole. Literally. Like I've said. Several. Times. In fact he is with me about half an hour more per week than he is with her. Get that fact through your pointy little trolling head. Sorta blows your words out of the water, doesn't it? No one is leaning on HER to be responsible. I wonder why? And see, what did I tell ya about trusting in love? You had to pay an attorney fee to hear it. I told you previously, pro bono. It's more like "trust in the greed of the legal system". Why should they allow people to forge an enforceable peace when there is so much more profit in escalating weapons sales between them? - Ron ^*^ |
#6
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Simpledog wrote: Don't take this the wrong way, but why did you get her pregnant if you hadn't cleared this up? Oh, well, we had planned on clearing it up later on. And to be honest, I do trust her. She's an amazing woman. I seriously doubt I'll ever have to worry about any of this with her. But... You never know. She is as interested in working this out as I am. She earns three times what I do and works longer hours. It is not inconcievable that I could win a custody battle on grounds that I spend more time with the child. Then she would be paying through the nose, evidently even if we were to split physical placement 50/50. Family Court says it's all for the children, but in reality it's all about the Benjamins, folks! - Ron ^*^ |
#7
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"Werebat" wrote in message
news:02H_d.65143$7z6.5545@lakeread04... SNIP She is as interested in working this out as I am. She earns three times what I do and works longer hours. It is not inconcievable that I could This is the key - next time around you meet up with someone who makes and has assets as much or MORE than you do. This prevents you from getting slammed in the family law court room. I lucked out and found a great woman - never married, no kids, college degree, decent job. win a custody battle on grounds that I spend more time with the child. Then she would be paying through the nose, evidently even if we were to split physical placement 50/50. Family Court says it's all for the children, but in reality it's all about the Benjamins, folks! - Ron ^*^ |
#8
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I think this is pretty good advice. It's not my intention to sound too
sexist, but often many men do choose women that... well, need to be cared for...um, maybe too much. Which I truely do not believe is, in and of itself bad. As a matter of fact my feelings are that I believe a man's natural inclination to be hmm...I don't know the right words... main support, (ugh, some of you are gonna hate this) natural head of the family.. um, tough guy, king kahuna, whatever... is a wonderful thing! (I promise I am not making fun, I just really can't find the right term, but I hope you get my drift)... My husband is truely my rock, I thank God for him daily. And, although I don't make the kind of money that he does, I do make about 2/3 of it and I did come into our marriage with sizable assets (no pun intended) as both my parents were deceased and there was an inheritance... which is probably not important. But what is, is that we BOTH work for the benfit of our family and I fully understood his work ethic and he understood mine long before we ever said "I DO". I have read this group on and off for years, and it still hurts me to hear the pain I read here. Since I haven't been here for awhile it's probably best that you know that I'm on the conceived "other side" of the fence from the majority of you here... but it doesn't change that no matter who got screwed the person that was the offender it not here ... my ex-husband left his two daughters years ago and no matter how much my husband loves them, they will never be whole, knowing they weren't important enough him to stick around for. And every now and then those issues come up in our lives... those daughters are 19 and 21 years old now....and when those hurts come up I tend to check back in here.... It's good to vent! Sometimes it prevents people from doing things they will regret later. But just maybe if we share we can help our kids thru those hurts......... Andi "flinrius" wrote in message link.net... "Werebat" wrote in message news:02H_d.65143$7z6.5545@lakeread04... SNIP She is as interested in working this out as I am. She earns three times what I do and works longer hours. It is not inconcievable that I could This is the key - next time around you meet up with someone who makes and has assets as much or MORE than you do. This prevents you from getting slammed in the family law court room. I lucked out and found a great woman - never married, no kids, college degree, decent job. win a custody battle on grounds that I spend more time with the child. Then she would be paying through the nose, evidently even if we were to split physical placement 50/50. Family Court says it's all for the children, but in reality it's all about the Benjamins, folks! - Ron ^*^ |
#9
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A profit for who?
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#10
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They didn't teach grammer at Harvard?
You are deafanately inntooleckshually stuperior to WHOM? English 101 First lesson free aka pro boner It might be useful to compare the forms of who to the forms of the pronouns he and they. Their forms are similar: Subject Form Possessive Form Object Form Singular he who his whose him whom Plural they who their whose them whom To choose correctly among the forms of who, re-phrase the sentence so you choose between he and him. If you want him, write whom; if you want he, write who. a.. Who do you think is responsible? (Do you think he is responsible?) b.. Whom shall we ask to the party? (Shall we ask him to the party?) c.. Give the box to whomever you please. (Give the box to him.) d.. Give the box to whoever seems to want it most. (He seems to want it most. [And then the clause "whoever seems to want it most" is the object of the preposition "to."]) e.. Whoever shows up first will win the prize. (He shows up first.) "William Barger" wrote in message ... A profit for who? |
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