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A slant on spanking



 
 
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  #11  
Old February 24th 04, 10:09 PM
Stephanie Stowe
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default A slant on spanking


"Doan" wrote in message
...
A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language: English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that professionals

in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the

subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not hitting

the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause much

more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have appeared in

the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are

authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional studies may

be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the

anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged

negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what I

refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the mental

and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes that are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the heart

and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates doing

time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young

children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the graduates

of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid support. As

a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early

development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced

"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in families of

all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three families

where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted, responsible

people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period from

about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent, nor were

they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any other

such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was not an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of

promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be personally safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive

capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get

through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon the

child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with

other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a lot

of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques that just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place spanking

in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I always

urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations with

their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that

inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought to have

a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just may

be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular child

at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork in an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your hand

so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom as

you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks you

get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop

psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming along too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would suggest

that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late Dr.

Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the Gesell


Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on never

spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics for

Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.



This is the weirest article I have ever read. Where's the beef?

S


  #12  
Old February 26th 04, 02:37 AM
Carlson LaVonne
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking

Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able to hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected? Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language: English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not hitting the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause much more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have appeared in the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional studies may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what I refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the mental and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes that are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the heart and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates doing time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid support. As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced "problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in families of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three families where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted, responsible people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period from about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent, nor were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any other such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was not an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be personally safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon the child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a lot of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques that just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I always urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations with their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought to have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just may be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork in an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom as you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks you get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming along too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would suggest that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late Dr. Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on never spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics for Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.


  #13  
Old February 26th 04, 05:09 AM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old LaVonne A slant on spanking



On Wed, 25 Feb 2004, Carlson LaVonne wrote:

I don't get it.


And you would be right! ;-)

Doan

  #14  
Old February 27th 04, 08:35 PM
Stephanie Stowe
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking

One must defend the rightness of hitting one's kid or one has to face that
it was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.

S
"Carlson LaVonne" wrote in message
...
Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able to hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected? Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language: English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that

professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the

subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not hitting

the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause much

more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have appeared in

the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of

emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are

authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my

opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional studies

may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the

anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged

negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what I

refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the mental

and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes that

are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the heart

and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are

highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates doing

time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young

children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the

graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as

well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid support.

As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early

development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at

experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced

"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in families

of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three families

where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted, responsible

people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period from

about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent, nor

were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any other

such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was not

an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of

promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this

particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be personally

safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive

capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the

child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get

through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon the

child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with

other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a lot

of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques that

just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place

spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I always

urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations with

their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that

inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought to

have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just may

be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular

child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork in

an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your

hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom as

you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks you

get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop

psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to

your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming along

too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would suggest

that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late Dr.

Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the

Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's

foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on never

spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter

Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics for

Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.




  #15  
Old February 27th 04, 09:25 PM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking


I just love the logic of the anti-spanking zealotS! :-) Let's try this:

One must defend the rightness of DIAPERING one's kid or one has to face
thatit was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.

Logic and the anti-spanking zealotS, are they mutually exclusive? ;-0

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:
One must defend the rightness of hitting one's kid or one has to face that
it was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.



S
"Carlson LaVonne" wrote in message
...
Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able to hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected? Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language: English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that

professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the

subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not hitting

the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause much

more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have appeared in

the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of

emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are

authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my

opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional studies

may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the

anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged

negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what I

refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the mental

and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes that

are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the heart

and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are

highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates doing

time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young

children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the

graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as

well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid support.

As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early

development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at

experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced

"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in families

of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three families

where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted, responsible

people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period from

about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent, nor

were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any other

such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was not

an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of

promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this

particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be personally

safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive

capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the

child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get

through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon the

child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with

other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a lot

of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques that

just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place

spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I always

urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations with

their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that

inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought to

have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just may

be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular

child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork in

an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your

hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom as

you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks you

get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop

psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to

your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming along

too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would suggest

that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late Dr.

Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the

Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's

foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on never

spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter

Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics for

Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.






  #16  
Old February 27th 04, 10:33 PM
Stephanie Stowe
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking

Can diapering be harmful? I never knew that.

geeeeesh

"Doan" wrote in message
...

I just love the logic of the anti-spanking zealotS! :-) Let's try this:

One must defend the rightness of DIAPERING one's kid or one has to face
thatit was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in

either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.

Logic and the anti-spanking zealotS, are they mutually exclusive? ;-0

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:
One must defend the rightness of hitting one's kid or one has to face

that
it was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in

either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.



S
"Carlson LaVonne" wrote in message
...
Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to

keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able to

hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected? Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally

justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language:

English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that

professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the

subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not

hitting
the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause

much
more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have

appeared in
the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence

to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not

only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of

emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of

corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are

authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my

opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on

personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional

studies
may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either

built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the

anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged

negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what

I
refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the

mental
and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes

that
are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is

highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the

heart
and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are

highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from

limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates

doing
time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young

children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the

graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as

well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid

support.
As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity

to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early

development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at

experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced

"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in

families
of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three

families
where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted,

responsible
people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period

from
about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent,

nor
were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any

other
such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was

not
an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of

promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this

particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be

personally
safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in

a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive

capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably

better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the

child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get

through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon

the
child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with

other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a

lot
of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques

that
just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place

spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I

always
urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations

with
their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that

inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought

to
have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just

may
be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular

child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork

in
an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your

hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom

as
you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks

you
get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop

psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to

your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming

along
too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would

suggest
that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late

Dr.
Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the

Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's

foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on

never
spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of

times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter

Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory

and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address

is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics

for
Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.








  #17  
Old February 27th 04, 11:29 PM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking


Yes! Ever heard of DIAPER rash? I think the medical term is diaper
dermatitis. And you called yourself a mom! ;-)

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:

Can diapering be harmful? I never knew that.

geeeeesh

"Doan" wrote in message
...

I just love the logic of the anti-spanking zealotS! :-) Let's try this:

One must defend the rightness of DIAPERING one's kid or one has to face
thatit was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in

either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.

Logic and the anti-spanking zealotS, are they mutually exclusive? ;-0

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:
One must defend the rightness of hitting one's kid or one has to face

that
it was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result in

either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.



S
"Carlson LaVonne" wrote in message
...
Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to

keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able to

hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected? Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally

justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language:

English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that
professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the
subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not

hitting
the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause

much
more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have

appeared in
the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence

to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not

only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of
emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of

corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are
authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my
opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on

personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional

studies
may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either

built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the
anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged
negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what

I
refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the

mental
and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes

that
are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is

highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the

heart
and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are
highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from

limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates

doing
time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young
children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the
graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as
well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid

support.
As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity

to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early
development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at
experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced
"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in

families
of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three

families
where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted,

responsible
people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period

from
about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent,

nor
were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any

other
such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was

not
an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of
promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this
particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be

personally
safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in

a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive
capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably

better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the
child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get
through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon

the
child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with
other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a

lot
of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques

that
just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place
spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I

always
urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations

with
their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that
inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought

to
have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just

may
be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular
child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork

in
an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your
hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom

as
you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks

you
get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop
psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to
your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming

along
too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would

suggest
that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late

Dr.
Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the
Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's
foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on

never
spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of

times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter
Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory

and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address

is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics

for
Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.










  #18  
Old March 2nd 04, 09:03 PM
Stephanie Stowe
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking

Diaper rash comes from failing to diaper. Not diapering.

Geeesh,

"Doan" wrote in message
...

Yes! Ever heard of DIAPER rash? I think the medical term is diaper
dermatitis. And you called yourself a mom! ;-)

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:

Can diapering be harmful? I never knew that.

geeeeesh

"Doan" wrote in message
...

I just love the logic of the anti-spanking zealotS! :-) Let's try

this:

One must defend the rightness of DIAPERING one's kid or one has to

face
thatit was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result

in
either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.

Logic and the anti-spanking zealotS, are they mutually exclusive? ;-0

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:
One must defend the rightness of hitting one's kid or one has to

face
that
it was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result

in
either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.


S
"Carlson LaVonne" wrote in message
...
Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to

keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able

to
hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected?

Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally

justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the

body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language:

English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that
professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on

the
subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not

hitting
the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to

cause
much
more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have

appeared in
the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming

evidence
to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not

only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of
emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of

corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who

are
authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In

my
opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on

personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional

studies
may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either

built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything

so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the
anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the

alleged
negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by

what
I
refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through

the
mental
and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes

that
are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is

highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into

the
heart
and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result

are
highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the

long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from

limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the

inmates
doing
time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were

young
children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the
graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young

children as
well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid

support.
As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the

opportunity
to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of

early
development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at
experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced
"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in

families
of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three

families
where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted,

responsible
people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the

period
from
about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not

frequent,
nor
were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any

other
such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist

was
not
an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important

part of
promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this
particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be

personally
safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the

child in
a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive
capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably

better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil

the
child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to

get
through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending

upon
the
child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with
other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children

in a
lot
of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques

that
just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place
spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I

always
urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many

confrontations
with
their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those

that
inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be

thought
to
have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking

just
may
be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their

particular
child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a

fork
in
an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of

your
hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the

bottom
as
you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty

looks
you
get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop
psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable

damage to
your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming

along
too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would

suggest
that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the

late
Dr.
Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of

the
Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's
foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on

never
spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of

times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The

Epicenter
Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family

advisory
and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail

address
is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. ,

Pediatrics
for
Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.












  #19  
Old March 2nd 04, 09:15 PM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default The Same Old Doan Slant On Spanking, was A slant on spanking


There will be no diaper rash if there is no diaper. Kids do not need
diaper.

Doan

On Tue, 2 Mar 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:

Diaper rash comes from failing to diaper. Not diapering.

Geeesh,

"Doan" wrote in message
...

Yes! Ever heard of DIAPER rash? I think the medical term is diaper
dermatitis. And you called yourself a mom! ;-)

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:

Can diapering be harmful? I never knew that.

geeeeesh

"Doan" wrote in message
...

I just love the logic of the anti-spanking zealotS! :-) Let's try

this:

One must defend the rightness of DIAPERING one's kid or one has to

face
thatit was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result

in
either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.

Logic and the anti-spanking zealotS, are they mutually exclusive? ;-0

Doan


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004, Stephanie Stowe wrote:
One must defend the rightness of hitting one's kid or one has to

face
that
it was wrong for their parents to do it to them. This would result

in
either
the need to forgive or to hate. Neither is easy. Denial is easier.


S
"Carlson LaVonne" wrote in message
...
Have you ever wondered why individuals fight so terribly hard to
keep
children legally hittable? It seems pretty bizarre to me.

Is it ignorance? Is it fear? Is it the enjoyment of being able

to
hit
someone and children are small, safe, and not legally protected?

Is it
the need to feel powerful? Is it a replay of the parenting these
individuals received as children? Is it payback?

I don't get it. I cannot understand why anyone would rationally
justify
or fight for the supposed right to raise his/her hand and hit the

body
of a little child.

LaVonne

Doan wrote:

A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language:
English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that
professionals in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on

the
subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not
hitting
the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to

cause
much
more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have
appeared in
the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming

evidence
to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not
only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of
emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of
corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who

are
authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In

my
opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on
personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional
studies
may be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either
built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything

so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the
anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the

alleged
negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by

what
I
refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through

the
mental
and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes
that
are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is
highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into

the
heart
and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result

are
highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the

long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from
limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the

inmates
doing
time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were

young
children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the
graduates of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young

children as
well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid
support.
As a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the

opportunity
to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of

early
development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at
experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced
"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in
families
of all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three
families
where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted,
responsible
people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the

period
from
about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not

frequent,
nor
were they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any
other
such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist

was
not
an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important

part of
promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this
particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be
personally
safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the

child in
a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive
capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably
better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil

the
child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to

get
through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending

upon
the
child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with
other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children

in a
lot
of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques
that
just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place
spanking in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I
always
urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many

confrontations
with
their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those

that
inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be

thought
to
have a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking

just
may
be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their

particular
child at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a

fork
in
an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of

your
hand so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the

bottom
as
you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty

looks
you
get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop
psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable

damage to
your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming
along
too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would
suggest
that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the

late
Dr.
Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of

the
Gesell
Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's
foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on
never
spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of
times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The

Epicenter
Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family

advisory
and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail

address
is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. ,

Pediatrics
for
Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.














  #20  
Old March 3rd 04, 06:14 PM
Ron
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default A slant on spanking


"Stephanie Stowe" wrote in message
...

"Doan" wrote in message
...
A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language: English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that

professionals
in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the

subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not hitting

the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause much

more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have appeared in

the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of

emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are

authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my

opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional studies

may
be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the

anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged

negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what I

refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the mental

and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes that

are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the heart

and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are

highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates doing

time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young

children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the

graduates
of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as

well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid support.

As
a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early

development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at

experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced

"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in families

of
all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three families

where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted, responsible

people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period from

about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent, nor

were
they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any other

such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was not

an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of

promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this

particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be personally

safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive

capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the

child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get

through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon the

child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with

other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a lot

of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques that

just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place

spanking
in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I always

urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations with

their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that

inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought to

have
a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just may

be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular

child
at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork in

an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your

hand
so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom as

you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks you

get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop

psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to

your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming along

too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would suggest

that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late Dr.

Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the

Gesell

Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's

foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on never

spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter

Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics for

Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.



This is the weirest article I have ever read. Where's the beef?

S


Here.

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois.



 




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