If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. |
|
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
#1
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
My youngest is about to turn 3. To say he is not interested in potty training would be an understatement. He will not sit on the potty without a diaper on. He seems scared, though he is not afraid to sit on it in a diaper and PJs (which he does every night after brushing his teeth while I give him his fluoride supplement). I've tried casually mentioning that at some point he's going to be too big for diapers and will wear underwear, and make his pees and poops in the potty. Whenever I mention anything of the sort, he gets agitated and says he doesn't "like" (he means "want") to go potty, and I drop it. Whenever I pick him up from preschool, I casually ask if he went potty that day and he repsonds (calmly) that he did not, and I say, "Oh, well, maybe tomorrow" to which he agrees ;-) Several of his classmates are trained or training, so there's plenty of potty use going on there. We went out and bought 4 packages of cool underwear, which he likes but not enough to try wearing it. I'm not really in a big hurry to get him to potty train, and in many ways it would be easier to wait until after our family vacation this summer (newly trained children can be quite a challenge while travelling). It just seems really odd to me that he is so resistant to this and it can't be "marketed" to him in any way, shape or form. I would like him to train before kindergarten ;-) So, should I just drop it for now, or keep talking about his cool underwear and about how "someday" he'll wear underwear and use the potty like his big brothers do. We have a potty video that he likes, but no books, fwiw. Thanks in advance, --Robyn (mommy to Ryan 9/93 and Matthew 6/96 and Evan 3/01) |
#2
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
"Robyn Kozierok" wrote in message
... I've tried casually mentioning that at some point he's going to be too big for diapers and will wear underwear, and make his pees and poops in the potty. When Rose was three, she mentioned that she would do such things when she was old enough to drive the car, and vote. We finally got her "trained" on her fourth birthday, basically by being total and complete potty nazis, just like they tell you not to do. We could have done it at least six months earlier, and probably much earlier than that, if we had had the support in being completely and thoroughly harsh and unrelenting on the issue. Everyone tells you to wait until the kid is ready, don't push it, etc. Well, that might be true with lots of kids, but it wasn't true for us. If you want the war story, I can dig it up and email it to you. If I remember right, 40% of kids are not PT by age 3, but only 2% aren't by age 4, so there's lots of hope for you all yet, though. Warm Regards, Claire Petersky Please replace earthlink for mouse-potato and .net for .com Home of the meditative cyclist: http://home.earthlink.net/~cpetersky/Welcome.htm Email me the new Tiferet CD (http://www.tiferet.net) |
#3
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
|
#4
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
"Robyn Kozierok" wrote in message ... My youngest is about to turn 3. To say he is not interested in potty training would be an understatement. He will not sit on the potty without a diaper on. He seems scared, though he is not afraid to sit on it in a diaper and PJs (which he does every night after brushing his teeth while I give him his fluoride supplement). I've tried casually mentioning that at some point he's going to be too big for diapers and will wear underwear, and make his pees and poops in the potty. Whenever I mention anything of the sort, he gets agitated and says he doesn't "like" (he means "want") to go potty, and I drop it. I'd drop it for awhile, until it's been forgotten about as an issue -- maybe a few months? Then try again as you've been doing, maybe adding in a cup of M&Ms as an incentive for using the toilet. My son wasn't afraid of the potty but totally resistant to it. it seemed to me that he just saw no benefit to himself, and none of the usual arguments (e.g., peer issues) mattered to him. Why stop what you're doing to hit the toilet when you can keep going and get it taken care of at your convenience? Finally, a few months before his 4th birthday, I warned him that he was going to be using the toilet by 4. Period. I reminded him about that a few times over the course of a few weeks. Then, perhaps a month before he turned 4, I gave him a week's notice. On deadline-day, after preschool, he was made to put on underwear. He didn't want to, but nor did he refuse. He peed in it. I expressed my displeasure the same way I might have if he'd done anything else in direct defiance. Later that evening, he pooped in his underwear. (And this is a boy who used to go behind a chair to poop in his diaper, so he knew what he was doing.) I gave him loads of trouble. That was that. Never another accident. So, again, because he was so old and clearly physically and intellectually ready, I treated it like any other thing I needed him to do, such as cleaning his room, etc. However, your child is almost a year younger than my son was when we did this. I don't think I would have handled it this way with an almost 3 YO. As I'm sure you remember from your other kids, from almost 3 to almost 4 is a huge difference. And you might see more natural progress in the next 6-9 months. For whatever reason, I was not willing to have a 4 YO in diapers. Good luck! I hope it goes as well for you. |
#5
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
|
#6
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
|
#7
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
|
#8
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
"Bev Brandt" wrote in message
om... If that doesn't work, I was thinking of taking a few days off and hiding the diapers and letting youngest go about in either underwear or nothing. We did "naked and $75" with our little boy. When he was home, he wore no pants. He had a little potty seat in the family room so he could use the potty right when he needed to. He had a few accidents, and we had to occasionally put the computer in "time out" when he'd have an accident while playing on the computer, but within a couple of weeks he was trained. If we had waited until he was ready...well, who knows how long it would have been. He was over three years old (three months over, I think), and *I* was ready. The $75 is to have the carpet cleaned when the process is over. Best, Ann P.S. Robyn, how the heck did Evan get to be three already? He was just born! |
#9
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
In ,
Robyn Kozierok wrote: *It just seems really odd to me that he is so resistant to this and it *can't be "marketed" to him in any way, shape or form. I would like him *to train before kindergarten ;-) So, should I just drop it for now, or *keep talking about his cool underwear and about how "someday" he'll *wear underwear and use the potty like his big brothers do. We have a *potty video that he likes, but no books, fwiw. I made two full-on attempts at potty training my son during his 2-year-old year - first during winter break (he has a September birthday so he was a young 2 year old then) and then during spring break. Both times he STRONGLY resisted and the longer of the two attempts lasted less than 48 hours. He cried and said he did not LIKE the potty and that he wanted to wear diapers. Gosh, i feel just plain mean thinking about it. Anyway, we decided to blow it off entirely but to keep the potty there and to remind him a few times a week that if he DID want to use the potty and wear big boy underwear, it was there. Well, the first day of camp he woke up and said "I want to use the potty and wear big boy underwear" and that was it, he was pretty much trained. So that would have been in June. I think if I were you I would give it more time. I know my best friend's little girl, who is my son's age, is very very resistant to potty training too, if it makes you feel any better. Some kids are just that way, I think. -- hillary israeli vmd http://www.hillary.net "uber vaccae in quattuor partes divisum est." not-so-newly minted veterinarian-at-large |
#10
|
|||
|
|||
3yo avoiding potty training
In article , Bev Brandt wrote:
(Robyn Kozierok) wrote in message ... My youngest (of 3 kids as well) is 3.5 and has no desire to go in the toilet, either. None. Nada. Could not care about it any less. We had similar problems with my son. Even once we got him to use the potty at home he would not use the (child size) toilets at the day care. When we switched him to underpants, he'd retain his urine for 6 hours rather than use the toilets at school. The preschool staff were very good about dealing with both the stubbornness and the occassional accidents. Interestingly, he was dry at night long before he was fully toilet trained. He got over the problem of using toilets outside the home before kindergarten started, luckily, though he did still need to be reminded to go to the bathroom before starting something engrossing like using the computer or reading. |
Thread Tools | |
Display Modes | |
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
Bare-bottom potty training & cleanup | Irene | General | 21 | June 9th 04 08:45 PM |
potty training question - kinda long | Stephanie Stowe | General | 26 | April 21st 04 06:01 PM |
Update - child-led potty training | Cathy Weeks | General | 2 | November 22nd 03 11:00 PM |
OT - Potty training - can it be child-led? (xpost) | Cathy Weeks | General | 40 | November 21st 03 10:05 PM |
potty training | lynn | General | 8 | August 6th 03 10:37 PM |